Title: Cloak and Wand
Rating: PG-13 for violence right now, may necessitate a stronger rating in
Category: Crossover X-Files/Harry Potter
Disclaimer: I own nothing, no services, goods or money is exchanging hands,
and no horses were harmed or even slightly inconvenienced in the creation
of this story.
Author's Note: This is my very first serious fanfic. Comments are very
welcome, even flames. Dedicated to the Wee Three, Anna "Well Spotted,"
Dana "Are you a witch or aren't you?," and Jeff "Ah, we've won."
* * * * * * *
Cloak and Wand: Chapter the First
The man took a drag from his cigarette and watched the two men on his video
monitor thoughtfully. Though these particular employees weren't the
brightest bulbs in the bunch, what they lacked in creativity they made up
for in size and strength. At least they had been able to set up the video
feed properly. The day's last rays of natural light had ceased filtering
through the dense foliage, but the man could still make out his operatives'
boulderlike forms on the brilliant green and black screen. And so he leaned
back in his chair and waited.
* * * * * * *
Halfway across the globe, the two men stood in uncomfortable silence. The
evening air was muggy, but neither man felt like advertising their presence
to whatever might be around the next tree. Heavy rain had been predicted
for the evening and into the night, but a light, swirling mist was all that
evidenced that particular forecast. The smaller of the two checked his
watch quickly, then returned his hand to the protection of his pocket. The
taller man grunted, then checked his own watch.
"They don't keep time like us, you know."
"You met one before?"
"Well, not me, but my mate Port has."
"They really ten feet tall?"
The larger man smiled a superior smile. "There's none out there taller than
me, and that's a fact. They don't breathe fire or belch poison gas, and
they don't eat nothing but plants. Oooh, you going to piss your pants?"
The smaller man puffed out his barrel chest in annoyance. "There ain't no
need to be sharpish. I just asked a question. Besides, how d'you know if
you never seen one?"
The taller man winced. "Just keep it down, will you? They may not be
dangerous, but they's right tricky to deal with. You just keep your trap
shut and let me do all the talking."
The smaller man narrowed his eyes, but said nothing more. He began digging
his toe into the soil and kicking clods of it at the trees. The minutes
dragged on in relative silence; occasionally a clump of turf would thud
against a tree or disturb the leaves of a bush. Suddenly, the tall man
grabbed the other by the arm.
"Stop that! I think I heard something," he hissed in the short man's ear.
Sure enough, both men could hear hoofbeats and the sound of something
powerful breaking through the brush. Whatever it was was getting steadily
closer, and the men began to yell.
"Oi there! Get back! Keep 'way!" The short man's voice cracked, and his
partner elbowed him.
"I told you to keep quiet!" He took a deep breath and yelled in what he
hoped was a threatening voice. "Stay away from us. We're armed!"
A rich chuckle came from the edge of the clearing, but its owner was
obscured by the mist. "Since Jupiter is rising, I won't take offence."
"Did you bring the samples?"
The chuckle again, "My kind do not renege on deals. I won't insult you by
asking if you brought what I want."
The short man tapped his foot against a cardboard box. "Right here, mate."
The tall man glared at him.
"Very well, I shall move very slowly toward you with the samples in my left
hand. I promise not to make any sudden moves. I will brook no aggression."
The tall man swallowed perceptibly. "Leave the samples on the ground where
the box is. Keep away."
Both men took several quick steps back from the box and watched anxiously.
From the bank of mist stepped a magnificent creature. His horse half was
well-formed and dark chestnut, and his muscular human torso and head were
equally so. His eyes were a soft brown, and his features were as sweet as a
cherub's. The two men gaped at him.
"I believe these are what you requested," said the creature, who held out a
small ice chest. The white styrofoam object seemed horribly incongruous
with the unearthly being that stood before them. "May I?" he asked,
gesturing toward the box.
The tall man nodded dumbly. The centaur knelt and placed the chest on the
ground, then scooped the box under his arm. He smiled brilliantly, and
nodded approvingly at the men.
"Everything seems to be in order. Thank you for your cooperation. I believe
it is customary to shake on transaction of this nature?"
The men made no move toward the centaur's extended hand.
"Well then, we shall forego that formality and part ways." He turned to
leave, but paused as an odd clicking noise drifted into the clearing.
"Aah," he said softly, gazing up at the clouded sky. "Mars must be bright
With that, he leaped over a fallen log and was gone.
The tall man cuffed the smaller man on the back of the head. "Didn't I tell
you to keep your gob shut?"
"You wasn't saying nothing, and it asked us a question!" The clicking
sounds were louder, and the tall man looked uneasy.
"Grab the samples, and let's get out of here."
As the small man reached for the ice chest, a stream of viscous white fluid
hit his hand. He yelled as more jets of fluid pelted him from various
directions. He turned to run, but his hand was stuck fast in the rapidly
hardening substance. The taller man tried to back quietly out of the
clearing, but he ran into something hard, bristly, and enormous.
A voice hissed in his ear, "Stay, my pet. The feed has just begun." He felt
a sudden pain in his shoulder which stung horribly, but suddenly there was
no pain. All was very warm and the voice in his ear was hissing "Sleep,
sleep, sleep" so sweetly. So tired. He wondered vaguely who was screaming,
but his eyelids were so heavy. He closed his eyes, and darkness came.
* * * * * * *
Thousands of miles away, the man with the cigarette swore softly at the
monitor in front of him. He spoke roughly into the intercom. "Get Malfoy,
and make it fast."
"Certainly, sir!" came the too-cheery voice of his assistant.
A few moments later, an irritated voice snapped, "This had better be
important. I'm entertaining some very important people."
The cigarette man's voice was smooth and even, "Lucius, my friend. This
evening's business venture seems to have gone awry."
"What the devil do I care? I held up my end of the bargain, and I will do
nothing until I see the results you promised. I can only keep my people
waiting for so long before they become... restless."
The silk was gone from the man's voice "You are in no position to be
issuing demands, Malfoy. It's your responsibility to find out what happened
in the forest tonight and recover what is ours."
Malfoy's voice was icy. "You mean what is yours. If you were fool enough to
send defenceless Muggles into that forest at night, then I will have no
part in fixing your mistakes. I arranged for my equine contact to meet your
operatives at great personal risk; I even affiliated them with my
"Then that was your own mistake," the Smoker interrupted. "Your
organization, your responsibility. I have perfect faith in your ability to
rectify the situation with minimal inconvenience to all."
Malfoy swore. "Have you any idea of the legal mess you've made for me?" He
composed himself. "Of course, I will require more of the usual
compensation. I'll see that everything goes through all necessary channels.
After tomorrow morning, they are no longer my responsibility. I trust your
agent will contact me during business hours and let me know how we are to
proceed. Good evening." The line went dead.
"Will you be needing anyone else, sir? My lunch break is coming up."
The man deftly tapped another Morley out of the package on his desk and lit
"Thank you, Doris. Will you get me Mr. Skinner on the phone before you
He inhaled deeply and rolled the familiar smoke around in his mouth before
"Right away, sir!"
The cigarette man smiled wanly. Moments later, the intercom on his desk
barked, "This is Skinner."
"Aah, Walter, how delightful to hear your voice again. I have a favor to
* * * * * * *
Fox Mulder bent delicately over the innards of the machine lay on his desk,
paintbrush in hand. He knew that Scully would be amazed if he could get the
machine, a relic from a bygone era, working again. He began picking the
larger clumps of dust from the cooling fan, then using the brush to remove
the dust from the tiny areas his fingers couldn't reach. After a few
minutes of painstaking work, he took a deep breath and blew at the dust as
hard as he could. Shutting his eyes quickly against the cloud that rose
before him and breathing in quickly through his nose, he grabbed a file
folder from his desk and began fanning the cloud away from him.
The door opened and Dana Scully swept into the room, directly into the
"Mulder!" she spluttered, "What have you been doing in here? Beating
carpets with old magazines?" She sneezed loudly.
"Just repairing the old slide projector. You know what that means!"
She rolled her eyes toward the ceiling. "A slide show of the exotic place
you'll undoubtedly be dragging me to at some ungodly hour? Wonderful. Just
what I need." She flopped down in her chair and let her head fall back
"The meeting went well, I take it?"
She groaned and lifted her head to look at him with narrowed eyes "If I
hear the word 'streamlining' one more time I'm going to scream. Why is it
that I'm the one who invariably has to attend these things?"
"Because we have a system, Scully. You attend the meetings on how to fill
out paperwork, and I do the actual filling out. That way, we achieve the
same level of efficiency as the rest of the Bureau." He snapped the
projector's casing back together and began replacing the screws. "That
should do it. What say I lift your spirits with good news and feats of
A smile quirked the corners of her lips "I'll pass on the feats of
audiovisual skill, but I could definitely use some good news."
Mulder shook his finger at her. "Now, now, Scully. First things first." He
flicked the light switch on the wall and plugged in the projector. It
whirred to life and lit up the adjescent wall. Mulder laughed triumphantly.
"My creature lives!" He began fitting the carousel of slides into the
machine, when it started making an odd grinding noise.
Scully wrinkled her nose. "Do you smell something burning?" Tendrils of
smoke began pouring out of the projector, but Mulder didn't seem to notice.
Scully strode quickly across the room to unplug the machine, but before she
could pull the plug, the machine sputtered and died. The smell of hot metal
and melting plastic was heavy in the air. Mulder's voice came sheepishly
out of the darkness. "I guess you won't be getting the slide show after
Scully felt around for Mulder's desk lamp and turned it on. "So is that the
good news or the audiovisual feat?"
"It was supposed to be both." He shurgged resignedly. "I might as well just
tell you. Skinner called me into his office while you were at the meeting
and suggested that we both take some time off."
"What?? He can't just remove us from duty! We're still behind on reports
from the incident in Tulsa, we're slated to check out the weird elements in
the Smithsonian break-in, and neither of us has been in trouble for months!
Well, unless you count that thing with the vat of chocolate, but I thought
you explained that when we returned."
Mulder cut her off. "Hold on a moment, Scully, we're not suspended or
dismissed. Skinner heard about some strange things going on in England and
he wants us to check them out."
Scully's brow wrinkled in confusion. "England? The Bureau doesn't have any
authority over there."
"We're being employed strictly as consultants. One of Skinner's connections
put out some discreet feelers to investigate some goings-on at the Brisbin
Institute. I figured that with your background in the sciences-"
"The Brisbin Institute?" Scully interjected, arching an eyebrow in
disbelief. "I don't have much research background in enzymology or cell
biology, and certainly not enough to be of use to people at the Brisbin
"But that's just it, Scully. They need people with experience in our field.
The unexplained. Paranormal phenomena. Our names were at the top of a very
"I see." Scully sat on the edge of Mulder's desk and eyed the smoking slide
projector for a moment. She paused before responding. "Well, I wouldn't
mind getting out of this basement for a while. I hate to think of all the
work we'll have to sort through when we get back, but-"
Mulder cut her off with a delighted whoop. "We'll have a great time,
Scully! The Brisbins won't know what hit them. And it only took me a few
minutes to convince you to come, even without a slide show! A personal
persuasiveness record! My previous best was 15 minutes back in 1994 when I
talked you into coming with me all the way to-"
Scully never found out which place she'd been too eager to visit, because
at that moment the smoke from the slide projector set off the fire alarm
and sprinkler system. Several minutes later when the entire Bureau was
assembled out on the front lawn, Scully mused over their brief
conversation. After checking in with her floor coordinator, she decided to
worry about the absence forms when she returned from England. "After all,"
she thought, tucking a wet strand of hair behind her ear, "we have a
system: I attend the meetings, Mulder does the paperwork."
She drove home, clothing sodden, but spirits considerably lighter than they
had been an hour ago.
* * * * * * *
A/N Please review!