Disclaimer: I do not own, nor claim to own, any of these characters.
A/N: Herro! I just fell in love with this pairing for the second time as I was playing the game a while ago. I’m at the part right before you get Endrance back. He’s one of my characters to play with, so I was trying to constantly get him to join my team. I never really read the message he sends back, though. I did for the first time just a bit ago and it made me love the pairing even more! ‘Goodbye, Haseo… Goodbye… My Beloved.’ Really?! Seriously? How can you not love him to DEATH ;3;. Oh well, so that is kind of how I came up with this idea… sort of. Yeah, this takes place like… 2 and a half years after the end of the game :]. This is going to be a short chapter. Just kind of introducing the plot. Not really, but meh. It’s where I’m deciding to stop the introductory chapter. Enjoy if you can~!

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Waste Some Time
Chapter One
The Fall of the Rose

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There are quite a few things you’d want to hear from the one person who means everything to you. Maybe it’s the love confession you’ve dreamt of, that thank you went out of your way to earn, or sometimes just a warm greeting; as long as they acknowledge your presence. But, though there aren’t too many things you do not want to hear from that same person, when you do it hurts.

The controller that fit so well in his hands slipped from his slackened grip, clattering to the floor with a noise that he heard even over the background music that had become the soundtrack of his life. The body of the man behind the avatar of Endrance froze, thin fingers clenching around thin air.

As there came a lull in the music, his headset blared with the small avatar’s response to The Terror of Death’s words, “How dare you speak to Master En that way, Haseo! I’ve tolerated you this long because Master En likes you, but you’ve gone too-.” SakuBo shrieked, sounding as affronted as he felt.

“You honestly think I care what you have to say? You’re even worse than him!” The thin man behind Endrance felt a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. His chest clenched and his uncut nails dug into his palms.

SakuBo took a step back, looking between Endrance and Haseo, ambiguous face set in a frown. “You’re not just going to stand there and let him speak to you like that, are you, Master En?” she turned toward him, arms held akimbo as she leaned forward. His avatar remained as it had been: pixels and polygons just moving as they were programmed to when the players behind them let them sit for long enough. The girl’s expression softened. “…Master En?”

The character design he’d come to love just smirked at him, his voice oddly deeper than usual as he spoke, “You see, he’s realizing that I’m right. He is completely worthless.” Kaoru’s heart pounded in his ears, his chest aching as he stared in disbelief at the avatar that belonged to the one person he cared the most for.

“H… Haseo?” his soft voice cracked on his end of the microphone, but it was covered up by the advanced technology invested in the specialized headsets- the voice of Endrance sounded just as smooth as it always did, if a little hurt. His hands dropped to his lap and he felt blindly around for his controller. He felt it against his foot and bent down, hands groping in the room he rarely felt a part of.

When it was safely back in his hands, Endrance took a step toward Haseo, one arm outstretching slowly as it always did. Longing to touch him, even in cyberspace; to know he could touch him, that he was within range. But he wasn’t. He couldn’t touch him and he would never try against the other’s will, no matter how much he yearned for it himself.

As the dark smile faded from the multi-weapon’s face, replaced by the glare he’d seen directed towards others, he felt the threat of tears prickling. “Why won’t you just go away?” Haseo asked. The boy’d never sounded this aggravated.

He retracted his arm, eyes on the face of the game character, trying to discern whether this was some kind of cruel joke. Surely… “Is that really what you want, Haseo?” he asked, the playback of his voice much harder than he’d ever heard it. Kaoru gripped his controller to his chest as he leaned over his desk, waiting breathlessly for the answer he hoped he’d never hear. And yet…

“Yes.”

Endrance’s eyes closed as he turned away. Kaoru’s thumbs froze at the controls. He didn’t want it to be true. “Then… I suppose,” he halted in his words, fighting to make sure there was no hint of his distress in the voice the man of his dreams heard. “This is goodbye, Haseo.” And with that, Endrance warped out of the field.

He didn’t bother to save his progress; he wouldn’t be back.

“Master En!” was the last thing he heard before he logged out.

Then there was silence. There was nothing but silence and black. In the solitude of his room, Ichinose Kaoru once again dropped his controller. He took off his headset, unplugging the computer. He got out of his chair and walked toward his untouched bed. For the first time in more than a few months he fell onto the sheets, curled up on the covers and closed his eyes.

And he cried.

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He was sitting with Haseo in a deserted field. The temple stood out in the distance, the moon looking much more real than it ever had before. He swore he could feel the grass tickling his hand as it lay so close to Haseo’s.

For the first time, it was actually him with Haseo. Not Endrance, but Kaoru. And it was Haseo, not Haseo, but the person behind the avatar, the way Kaoru saw him. And, though he knew the student probably didn’t look the way he imagined, the person beside him was even more breathtaking than the beautiful avatar. His image of the boy had brown hair and a youthful face, wearing the same white clothing from his final form. He was striking.

Kaoru found he was unable to look away. As their eyes met, he melted. Those warm chocolate pools captivated him. He longed to indulge himself in the man beside him, but he held himself back. He wouldn’t even dream about going against Haseo’s will. Instead, he settled for an endearing smile, turning his eyes respectfully up over the moon that hung so high over the far distant mountains.

He felt the weight on his shoulder, but he didn’t look. “Kaoru,” the other spoke softly, using a voice the elder had only heard him use once before. “I’m glad you invited me to join your party.” His hand was covered, though he still didn’t look. “Thank you.”

Even as the other’s fingers intertwined with his own, he didn’t look back.

He’d had this dream before.

Every time he fell asleep the previous year, he’d had it. And every single time he looked the other in the eyes he used those three irrevocable words. And without fail they would go in for the kiss… and then he would wake up. Just before their lips met.

He wanted to enjoy the dream while he could. To feel the hands together and the body heat, and the closeness he could never share with the man, no matter how long they spent online together. Three years he’d known Haseo, and in all that time, he’d never even learned his name. He really was worthless…

“Kaoru…?” He almost looked. The warmth against him stiffened as the fingers gripped tighter at his own. “Kaoru…” He realized that the dream wasn’t waiting for him to make the first move any more.

“I… I love you, Kaoru.”

That was new.

His resolve crumbled to the tenderness in the voice. He turned his face to the love of his life and saw how beautiful he really was in this moonlit area. In the distance he heard the soft crooning of one of the lucky animals. Haseo twisted around to face him, eyes searching and bright.

The brunette took control, straddling Kaoru’s bony hips. The connected hands lifted to his chest, and he felt the fluttering of his racing heart. Their faces drew nearer, Haseo’s eyes glowing with the light of the moon. Despite himself, Kaoru felt himself giving into temptation. Their lips were mere centimeters apart; he cold feel the younger’s breath hot on his sensitive skin.

Then Ryou was kissing him.

He found his back flat against the grassy ground and his lips moving on their own. His arms wrapped around the brunette, pulling them as close together as he could manage.

They broke for breath and as their eyes met, it was Haseo who glared down at him. “You’re worthless.”

In a heart beat and a half Kaoru was blinking the sleep from his eyes, unwinding from the warmth of the covers. Sunlight streaked through the window he’d forgotten was there. As he sat up, the lone blanket slid from his shoulders, pooling around him. His thoughts momentarily went to his mother. He’d have to thank her.

Immediately, Haseo was back at the forefront of his mind. They’d kissed, and it had been so real. He grasped the blanket tightly in his fist. He’d never allowed himself a kiss, even in his dreams, and it struck him that, given the choice, he wouldn’t have stopped. A blush lit up his cheeks. He shook his head, clearing it as best as he could.

There, sitting on the desk on the opposite side of the room, was the computer that had been his one constant connection to Haseo for the three years he’d known him. His stomach clenched. He wanted so badly to believe that he hadn’t really meant it; that it really had just been a cruel joke. But even he wasn’t delusional enough to convince himself of that. Instead, he stood from his bed and shuffled past what had been his life-line until, for the first time in nearly four days, he was out of his room.