Stupid Sonny

Something's gone terribly wrong, you're all I wanted. – Taylor Swift

Sonny woke up in Chad's estate on the couch in the game room. She opened her eyes, bewildered as she took in the scene surrounding her. Hey eyes rested on one of the portraits of Chad hanging on the wall… Chad. It all came flooding back to her, her excitement, the slow motion breaking of her heart, the pain… She got up abruptly with the strong intent, or more so need, to leave. She sped up as she came closer, almost running. The house was making her sick. She was so focused on getting out that she hadn't heard the doorman call her name.

"Ms. Munroe?" He called again. This time Sonny stopped, wiping her face before turning toward the man she'd smiled at so giddily just the day before. That seemed like ages ago. "He asked me to give this to you." He said, handing her an envelope that Sonny recognized; they'd always used these envelopes to answer their fan mail.

She nodded her thanks and walked as fast as she could out that door, knowing she could very well never enter it again. She kept on walking down his street till she couldn't see the house anymore, she walked without really seeing. She didn't care that her jeans were ripped and her hair was a mess. She didn't care that her right hand hurt a whole lot because it didn't compare to the ever present suffocation that was taking place in her chest. Nothing mattered to her but getting out, getting away from it. From the pile of rubble that used to be her oh so perfect life.

By the time she finally sat down on a bench tears were silently running down her face and her feet were quite sore in her sandals. She stared at the letter on her lap, her name, Sonny Monroe, was written in Chad's handwriting on the front. Hands shaking, she slowly opened the back and slipped the letter out. She carefully unfolded the expensive parchment and read the contents.

Sonny,

I love you, so much. I am so sorry.

I sent all your stuff back to your Mom's old apartment, the one she used before she moved back to Wisconsin. There is a key in the envelope; you can live there if you like.

Just let me explain things, give me a chance. If you are willing to, meet me at our spot tomorrow at 5 pm.

I love you, always,
Chad

Sonny stared at the letter, not really comprehending what it said. She read it again, and again, and again. She read it till her tears soaked the page and the words began melding together. She wanted to call him. Right then and there. Ask him how he could do this. She was so convinced; little did she know it was all about Tawni, not her. How could she have been so stupid and naïve to think that someone, especially Chad, would love her? The only one Chad loved is Chad. The urge to hit herself came over her and she trembled with anger, at herself, at Chad, at the world. Pulling out her cell she noticed about 15 missed calls, great, she thought. They were all from Marshall. She pressed end, not caring or wanting to call him back. Taking deep breathes she calmed herself. Pulling the key out of the envelope she resisted the urge to throw it down the man hole in the street and put it safely in her pocket. She hailed a cab and gave him the address.

It is gonna be okay, Sonny thought. It's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay. Though she didn't believe it, she continued to tell herself that. The truth is, she was unsure if she'd ever be the 'okay' again. The only thing that had really mattered in her life for the last year was Chad, and now the fact that it could be, or was gone. Had never even existed... She felt far away, not even there. It was like a dream, or nightmare that she couldn't escape. This was her new reality, all in the course of a night, everything was gone. It was just her, not 'Sonny and Chad', just Sonny. Stupid, naïve Sonny…