Author: Emo Fox PM
Zim finally defeated Dib. Why isn't it all he hoped for? Zim-centric/Slight ZaDr/Character DeathRated: Fiction K+ - English - Angst - Zim & Dib - Words: 1,175 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 3 - Published: 09-16-09 - Status: Complete - id: 5381012
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
By: Emo Fox
Zim was standing with his back to the computers, facing the elevator, his hands tucked behind his back. The luminous light from the monitors cast a shadow across the floor; it looked as if Dib were behind him, slumped over something near the computer console.
"I won." Zim said absently, though he seemed a little distracted, staring at nothing, his expression neutral despite what he had just said.
You lost, Zim.
Zim's red eyes looked down to the shadow to his left, frowning just slightly, "No I didn't."
What do you have to show for your victory?
Zim was quiet, staring at his feet a long moment, avoiding looking at the shadow to his left.
You messed everything up Zim. I was the only person who cared about you, the Tallest don't care, Irk doesn't care.
Zim reeled around, pointing accusingly towards the computers, "Shut up! You don't know anything! Shut up!"
Dib's blood-stained coat was hanging over the computer chair; his glasses lying on the desk. The human was nowhere to be seen, yet Zim just kept on pointing to the coat as if it offended him.
You don't know anything Zim.
"Zim knows all!" He shrieked, his red eyes looking a little confused, a little hurt as he glared at the emotionless items before him.
What do you know then? Tell me.
"I won." Zim said again though the conviction didn't make it to his tone this time.
What have you won?
"Fo-for Irk." Zim murmured, reaching up and running a hand over an antennae, glancing towards the hem of Dib's tattered trench coat.
Irk abandoned you. What are you going to do now, huh Zim? Who cares about your victory now?
It's the truth Zim, you destroyed everything.
"No, it was, it was for the mission." Zim looked a little worn, his eyes glancing here and there.
Mission. What mission? You've been here five years! Five years and then you just go and kill me! What's wrong with you?! They didn't care! You have nothing now Zim! Nothing! You don't even have me!
"That's not true." Zim's heart ached, his clawed hand gripping at the fabric on his chest, yanking it as if trying to make the hurt go away, "It's not true."
I can't come back Zim, I'm never coming back.
Zim looked torn, looking to the computers as he slowly made his way to them. He set himself in the chair, Dib's coat falling over his shoulders slightly as the Irken reached for the glasses. He held them to his chest as he curled over them, a finger running gently over the broken right lens. "No."
No? You have no say anymore Zim. I'm gone, there's nothing left, what are you going to do?
Zim was quiet.
We could have had something. There were so many what-ifs, so many things that could have happened, it could have gone differently.
"I'm an alien," Zim murmured almost without thought, "You were a human."
So? That's the stupidest excuse I've heard from you yet! Who cares? What did it matter?
Obviously, I'm dead.
Zim clenched his eyes shut, once again grabbing at his chest, trying to make the pain go away. "I didn't—I don't—" Zim choked, curling more into a ball on the chair, holding the pair of lenses firm.
Don't go on lying Zim. You know what you wanted to do; you knew exactly what you wanted to do when you came over that day. You wanted me dead.
"I didn't." Zim tried to protest, hearing the sneer in the human's voice.
It's too late now.
"No," Zim snapped his eyes open, the corners were leaking. "No, no, I can fix this! I can fix it!"
"I can!" Zim countered, "I—I can fix this."
It's over Zim.
"No, no, no it isn't!" Zim was growing hysterical, a choked sob ripping from his chest.
I'm dead. You can't just fix me like you fix Gir. It's over. We're done. You can go rule the world now, no one is going to stop you. Isn't that what you really wanted?
"I don't—" Zim snarled in anguish, "No, I, I didn't—"
Just say it, you did. You wanted to kill me from the beginning; you wanted to take over Earth. That's all you ever wanted. I was stupid to think things might've happened differently, to think you could change.
"Dib," The name hurt more than anything, acknowledging the cause of his suffering, "I can fix this. Zim can fix this; I just need, just give me time." He knew it was almost pointless to say this, but madness was creeping into his brain and Zim truly wanted to believe something could be done. Something could happen and then Dib would be wearing his coat again, these glasses, yelling at Zim because he ruined them. Zim couldn't help the tears that started to form, he wanted Dib back, he wanted him to run into his lab and demand he fight him again.
It would be different.
This time it would be different.
Zim wouldn't impale him, he wouldn't use his spider limbs and the electricity, he wouldn't try and murder him. He'd let Dib live, they'd just have a friendly fight like they had before.
Dib would live and Zim wouldn't be alone now.
He could fix this, he could fix this, he could fix this.
Zim started to rock in his seat, cradling the glasses like a lover.
You can't just fix it this time. It's over. Goodbye Zim.
"No!" Zim started, getting out of his seat, yelling to the quiet around him, "No! You aren't leaving! I won't let you leave!"
"Dib!" Zim yelled, "Dib! Answer me! Answer me stupid dirt-child!" Tears started to fall faster, his words started to turn into a mess of garbled noise. "D-Don't leave. Dib! Come back!"
Zim was left to his madness, left to his silence.
Zim broke down, falling to the floor, rocking as he cradled Dib's lenses. His eyes pinched shut as he continued to scream and yell, wanting things to change, wanting to fix everything that had been done.
There was no going back.
It was really over.
Zim had won.
Ugh. This was a whole lot better in my head last night but I had been too lazy to write it down or open the computer. I think I failed. Tell me what you think? I wanted to write something sad and profound but I don't think this really cut it. Oh well. Thanks for reading.