Tetris

One day, in the hot desert lands of mid-Egypt, a pharaoh was given the body of his son, who had died in battle against the Kushan Empire. As he lay his son before him, weeping, he asked the Gods to let his son leave this world in glory before the demonic Anubis took his the young fighter’s noble heart to the Great Scale.

In the Afterlife, the World of the Gods, Osiris answered his prayers. He turned to his armies of angels and called upon one, Khonsu, his best archangel. Osiris sent Khonsu down to the earth in the form of a wise sorcerer. As the sorcerer, Khonsu introduced himself to the pharaoh with the title of Tetris. Tetris came to the pharaoh with a deal: the largest tomb in history will be made for his son by the Gods…but sixty of his people will die of horrible causes. The pharaoh agreed, and so Tetris used the power of the Gods to create an extremely large hole, rectangular and paved with cinderblock on all of its sides.

From the Gods Tetris brought forth colorful bricks to bury the dead son, much to the pharaoh’s delight.

“Look!” cried Tetris. “See these stones of many hues? They are from the Underworld itself, and contain extremely powerful magic! Once set down, these blocks of many shapes and sizes will never move, so it is very important that they are set in the perfect place!”

So the pharaoh hired his sixty best workers in all the land to set work to his son’s tomb, placing the mummified body at the bottom of the paved trench. Although they managed a lot of progress, the workers were killed off one-by-one in accidents whilst working upon the gigantic puzzle. Eventually, all that was left was one block, a purple squared one that would look magnificent at the top…but no workers were left; all had perished.

The pharaoh himself pushed the block into the remaining space, and completed his son’s tomb. However, he wept with shame. This was not a tomb for only his son, but also of the sixty men who died trying to bury him…and the magical blocks could not be moved. Then Tetris appeared again, his face cold and expressionless.

“Why dost thou cry, king? Did you not achieve your son’s grave?”

“Not just his grave!” cried the king. “He has to share it with those…those peasants! You did not tell me the sixty dead men would be my workers, mage.”

“Selfish hooligan,” spat Tetris. “I shan’t bother with you anymore. Let this be a warning to you now: if you cannot share your presents of the Gods with others, do not expect the Gods to share any more gifts with you.”

And with a flash of light, Tetris was gone, leaving the pharaoh to weep upon his son’s tomb shared by sixty others.