|Sweet Dreams are Made of These
Author: Rosaiem PM
Poor Shin loves Nobu. And he can do nothing about it.Rated: Fiction M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Nobu & Shinichi - Words: 2,257 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10-09-09 - Status: Complete - id: 5432025
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Well, this was kind of a collab between me and Caseykins. She had the idea, we took turns... except I wrote the sex. xD I kind of revamped everything, though. She said it didn't even feel like her story anymore.
Warning, I have only read one volume of Nana, have only seen up to where Ren and Nana get back together, and do not know Shinichi at all. I am going off Caseykin's idea of his characterization. Sorry if they are OOC. -bow-
Warning (again) there is guraffic mayl secks in this story. And it is bad. xD Be gentle. Nobu isn't.
I love you.
He always woke up with the same pain in his chest, near his quick-beating heart. Always about the same person, always leaving him with the same empty feeling.
Shin sighed and twisted out of his sheets, making his way out of his bed to the kitchen to comfort himself with a late-night snack, as usual. Feeling for the light switch, he stifled a nervous scream when he made out a figure hunched over the table. He was relieved to see that the man was only Nobu.
His nervousness quickly returned when he remembered his dream. Nobu...
Shin couldn't see his friend's face, directed at the table, but he could hear the shakiness in voice. "Wha'cha doing up at this time of night, Shinichi?"
"Snack," he said, hovering anxiously in the door, "And you...?"
Nobu's fists, laying on the table, clenched tighter.
"Just got back from Nana's." Nobu tried too hard to make the words sound casual, and Shin could tell.
Something was obviously wrong. It wasn't hard to see- Nobu was greatly upset. But what bothered Shin more than his friend's anxiety was the fact that the only thing he could think about was his dream, zoning in on the well-shaped hands. The way he dreamed about those hands, the things they could do...
The blond head lifted, looking at Shin through hurt, but dry, eyes, and Shin felt guilty for even contemplating such things right now. His friend was in pain, his best friend, the one who had taken him in when he'd nowhere to go, and all he could think about was Nobu's shoulders, neck, hips.
"Nana dumped me, Shin."
After the initial flood of shock, Shin felt something that gave him more guilt- relief.
"She chose Takumi over me-"
How could he even feel that? Nobu'd been so good to him, and all he could feel was relief that he and his girlfriend had broken up.
"-he could keep her financially safe, and I know that now she needs that-"
He had been jealous their whole relationship, though he had no right to feel that way. His little crush on him made no difference.
"He's more mature, more popular, and he..." Nobu trailed off, biting his lip.
Shin wriggled, unsure. Just a little crush. A little...
"He has longer hair. Really long. Girls-" Nobu ran his fingers through his own short hair, finally breaking down and sobbing, "girls l-like long hair, d-don't they?"
At the sight of Nobu's tears, Shin rushed across the room, pulling the blond in his arms without thinking. Surprisingly, Nobu didn't resist.
"She's so perfect, Shin! She's so bright and... she makes me laugh and she is just so perfect and Shin I love her-"
Shin nuzzled the bleached head like a kitten, trying not to let the words hurt him, and Nobu spoke through heavy sobs.
"I don't think I can live without her, Shin. I don't think..."
Shin shut his eyes against the sobs racking the man's body. And when Nobu twisted about to clutch at Shin's shirt, the boy momentarily was lost in happiness.
To hold Nobu... to have Nobu holding him!
Suddenly, he was checked by guilt. This was his friend, his perfectly heterosexual friend, sobbing away for a girl he loved. His friend that needed comforting.
He almost detangled himself from Nobu. Almost
Shin didn't know how to comfort him. There were no words, nothing... he just wanted the sound of Nobu's crying to stop. So, without thinking, he lifted Nobu's face, opened his mouth for words that wouldn't come, and pressed his lips against Nobu's.
For a moment, he was lost, savoring the feel of the older male's mouth against his own, barely noticing Nobu's surprise.
His hands gripped the thin arms, just in time to prevent the startled male from twisting away.
"S-Shin! Wha-" was all Nobu managed to get out before his words were muffled by Shin's tongue exploring his mouth.
Shin loved the taste that invaded him. Loved it. It was just as he always had dreamed, better. He could feel Nobu trying to pull away, but he refused to let it happen.
He plunged his tongue deeper, too lost in blissful pleasure to notice the continuance of Nobu's struggles.
He prolonged the kiss for just one more moment before he pulled his tongue back, planting a light kiss on the pink lips before rubbing his cheek against the shocked Nobu, placing his lips against the pale shell of his friend's ear.
"I can make you forget...."
He quelled another attempt at escape. He could feel the warm tears wet his cheek, and realized just how ridiculous he was acting, but couldn't care less. His body went on autopilot, mouth saying whatever it needed to.
He traced Nobu's ear, nibbling gently on the lobe before speaking again.
"I'm good at what I do... Nobu..."
Shin moved to straddle Nobu's legs, ignoring the thrashing that it started.
"Shin! I don't care what you do! I'm your friend! But I don't like guys... I don't like you-"
"I could be her tonight, Nobu. Replace her." Shin whispered.
"You're nothing like her! You could never replace her! You have a c-cock Shin! I don't like men! I don't love you!" Nobu shouted almost frantically.
But I love you...
Gently, Shin hushed the wriggling man beside him. He gathered the shaking shoulders in one of his arms, transferring the other to make smooth patterns on Nobu's back.
"It's not like I'm going to force you into anything- just relax."
"Fo-force---?" Nobu senselessly sputtered, disbelief flashing in his eyes. "Shin- please- I don't like-! I don't want-!"
He continued, obviously failing to suppress a shudder as the blonde twirled his tongue around his neck intricately. "I'm not going to let you...!"
Shin smiled slightly- he felt like a parent comforting a crying child. "Nobu, trust me. I won't do anything you won't like."
"I'm going to punch you, Shin. I'm going to punch you in the face and I'm gonna knock you the hell out."
"Just pretend..." Shin moved his head to stare directly into the wild eyes before him.
"...just pretend I'm her."
He saw something switch in his friend's eyes. He moved back to the sharp collarbone, nipping around the broken line it drew on Nobu's chest.
"...Nana...?" Shin heard the breathy whisper drop in the air. "Yes," he hissed back, moving down to push up the thin cotton shirt and return to his lightly toned chest from a different angle. "Yes, Nana-"
Shin wasn't lying when he said he wasn't going to force Nobu into anything. He could, honestly. He was strong, had to be for what he did. But the thought made him sick, forcing anybody, especially his friend.
He wanted this to be nice.
He wanted Nobu to forget. He wanted to hold Nobu and comfort him. But most of all, he wanted Nobu... period. He knew it was dishonest, to himself and to Nobu, but if this was the way he could get him...
Even with the amount of people Shin had been with he was still able to be fascinated by Nobu's body, just as he knew he would be. The pale skin reminded him of cream and the heady flush that covered his cheeks was a beautiful shade of pink.
He brushed his thumb over one dark nipple and watched as it hardened to its peak. Nobu's expression betrayed his mixed emotions. And though pleasure was not in the forefront it was evident as he hissed and threw his head back.
He littered kisses in a downward course only stopping to make quick work of the buttons that kept his from his destination. But hands closed around his own as he began pulling at the belt loops of the jeans.
"No. Nana likes..." Nobu trailed off, giving Shin a little shove on the shoulders. He let himself fall backwards and hit the table with a thud, slightly unsure at the turn of events.
It was his turn to be surprised when he felt Nobu's weight push down on him, sandwiching him between the heavy table and himself. The pink lips he'd taken earlier now took him teasingly, tongue darting in and out.
Shin's back arched against the body, feeling a burning hand travel up his own shirt, thumb flitting over one nipple, Nobu's hand cupped in a habitual curl.
Nobu kissed his way gently behind the boy's ear, and drew his way downward with his free hand, working into the waistband of the drawstring pants Shin was wearing.
He was not used to this, receiving such actions. Nobody paid to get someone else off. His already hot need flared and burned deep in his belly. God, the way Nobu was touching him, Nobu was touching him-
Shin turned his head to look away from the man above him when Nobu tensed. His hand had frozen at the source of Shin's arousal. He was ashamed, as if Nobu hadn't known...
For a moment, he thought that Nobu was going to push away.
"I can't-" Nobu managed before Shin's lips softly touched his own.
After what seemed like eternities, Nobu kissed back, removing his hand. Shin vainly groaned in protest. It didn't seem to faze the blonde- he was somewhere else entirely.
His arms lifted as his shirt was pulled gracelessly off his body. He arched out of his loose pants and underwear. He shivered- the table surface was cold against his searing body.
Barely glancing at his naked flesh, Nobu hurriedly began yanking off his own clothes.
Shin flushed and shut his eyes. He knew this wouldn't be like he had fantasized about, wouldn't be how he had dreamed. But it still hurt. At least if he closed his own eyes, he would be able to pretend, too.
It hardly hurt when Nobu pushed in dry- he was used to that sort of thing. And when he gently thrust back and hit the pleasurable spot within him, Shin threw his head back and gasped.
Nobu took it slow, catering to the needs of another lover, laving the boy's neck and chest softly, kissing his ear, eyes, lips. The friction the dryness caused barely bothered Shin, him flying in his own heaven.
It didn't take long for him to get close, so sweetly close. The tiny grunts the man made with each thrust, the gentle hands smoothing over his torso and face, the way Nobu's soft lips rained kisses on his body, all of it so perfect.
"Nobu..." Shin moaned, dancing on the edge. "Nob-" his deep, hoarse voice was cut off sharply as the man's mouth sealed over his, preventing further sound.
At the verge of climax, he did what he always did in his fantasies of Nobu- he opened his eyes to stare deep into the eyes above him.
And the second before he slipped over the edge, he saw that Nobu's eyes were closed, blocking him out completely.
He felt as if he had shattered into shards. What should have been perfect, sweet fulfillment felt dirty.
I did this to myself, he thought, tears slipping out of the corners of his wide eyes, still riding throes of orgasm, I knew it would be like this, and I still feel so used.
Did I think he'd realize that he loved me, too...?
He shivered when Nobu thrust faster, erratic, himself nearing his climax.
I have never felt like more of a whore.
"Nana..." he groaned against Shin's lips, not noticing the wetness coursing down the smooth face. "Nana...!"
He ground his body harder, biting hard on the boy's lip. Blood filled Shin's mouth and Nobu's words stuck in his ears. "Nana-!"
He pretended I was her, just like I told him to. And still...
"-I love you..."
Later, after Nobu fell against him panting, after Nobu had pulled his clothes on and left without looking up from the ground, after he lay naked on the table for an hour, Nobu's seed dried on his thighs and he cried.
I have never felt like more of a whore.
"Girls l-like l-ong h-hair, don't they?"
Eh, I liked it, anyway.
Please, review. Unless you're Elizabeth. I told you not to read this, you little skank. xD
But seriously, please review.