Auberon was nervous. Now, the Companion was known about the Circle for being rather emotional, but even Sari could not remember a time when he had been nervous. He fidgeted about with an energy he couldn’t seem to contain, and finally this morning, Sari couldn’t take it anymore.

He was walking Auberon around the practice ring where the Guard trained with their horses. Although he knew the Companion would never toss him, Sari was still a bit weary of riding him for now, and was simply trying to work off the nerves.

He’d thought the fault had been his own. Sari, at first, was the one who’d been nervous. The encounter he’d had with Sidra had been days ago, but he still felt rattled every time he thought of it. He knew it was partially because he wasn’t used to feeling so strongly about anything, but the other part of him wasn’t sure at all about what to call the emotion he felt. He had felt drawn to her and yet repelled, and he couldn’t tell which one was stronger- or right.

When Elspeth had told him it would be Sidra he would be escorting, his stomach had leapt into his throat. He’d never felt such anticipation or terror. That alone was keeping him rattled. He felt out of control and out of his depth. Elspeth hadn’t seemed to notice, thank Vkandis, or he would have had to explain himself. As if he could have.

Normally, Auberon would have taken to opposite position as Sari as he always had done. When Sari was skeptical, Auberon was trusting. When Sari was irritated, Auberon was soothing. And when Auberon had airs, Sari kept to the ground.

This time, Auberon and Sari had gone their separate ways again, but oddly along the same path. And once Sari had regained enough of his head to really look into it, he realized that Auberon’s anger at having been put on a mission again wasn’t due to his wanting time to relax, but because of Jereth.

He got the feeling, as he listened to Auberon mutter about nothing, that Jereth was somewhat intimidating. Sari was far less impressed by the older Companion, especially since he had Chosen later than even his own foal (which seemed to have escaped Auberon’s notice), and was at a true loss as to why Auberon was stricken. It was enough to reduce him to being walked like a normal, everyday horse (which had also escaped Auberon’s notice) but Sari couldn’t think of anything else to do.

Truth be told, it was doing them both some good. Not only was it working off the Companion’s excess energy, but the repetition of it was serving to ground and center Sari himself. He felt his breathing fall into an even, regular pattern, and his racing mind settled back into the now. He began to put aside yesterday and tomorrow, and pulled this moment to the forefront. Eventually, he Felt Auberon begin to reach for the same place, and he very gently began to lead the Companion’s mind along with his hands.

It was nearly two hours before either of them was calm enough to leave the ring. Sari knew that he would have to keep a close eye of Auberon for the whole trip, although he was fairly sure the worst of it was over and done with. As for himself, he could only hope the worst was over for himself as well.

He was walking with Auberon (no longer actually walking him) back to the stables when they were intercepted. The man who approached them was elegant and slight, dressed in the particular green of the Healers. His blond hair was cut short for practicality’s sake rather than fashion, but the wide blue eyes he sported easily distracted anyone’s gaze from noticing right away. Sari did notice that he was actually wearing clean robes; normally this Healer sported so many stains and patches that it was difficult to tell which color was the original one.

“What can I do for you, Elios,” he asked, as the Healer came closer.

“Ouch. What’s got a bur under your tail,” Eli asked back, raising a golden eyebrow. “You never call me Elios unless something is bothering you. Out with it.”

Sari held in a sigh. He should have known Eli wouldn’t have been fooled by his light tone. Still, the Healer was the last person Sari wanted to see right now.

Anyone but Eli. Or Sidra, he thought to himself.

Out loud, he said, “Just a bit world weary. We’re going back out tomorrow and we’re both getting a bit impatient.” It wasn’t exactly a lie and it was something Eli would expect of him.

This time, it worked. “I know. That’s what I came to talk to you about. I spoke with Herald Elspeth and convinced her to let me come with you.”

Auberon snickered in his mind and Sari mentally groaned himself. This mission was going to kill him.

“Oh, Eli,” he said, not even bothering to hide the disapproval in his voice, “That would not be a good idea.”

“Sari, we’ve been through this,” Eli started.

“I know, I know. You’re over it.” Sari told him that he believed it every time it came up, but Sari was enough of an Empath to know it wasn’t true at all.

You would think he’d have gotten the picture years ago, Auberon remarked. Especially after that time he tried to make you jealous.

They had had a fling for a brief month back when they were both trainees, right after Sari had arrived, and right before Sari had realized that it would not be fair for any partner he took. Sari didn’t think about trysting the same way others did—it was an unemotional, unpleasurable thing for him. It had taken him the whole month to realize that he was only performing the act because he was not used to not performing it, and he had been using Eli to do it.

Of course Eli hadn’t understood. For years he’d tried every trick from every tale; trying a hand at making Sari jealous, following him around like a duckling, ignoring him completely. It had only served to make Sari feel pity that they hadn’t worked at all. A treacherous part of him almost wished that he could give back some of what Eli had been trying to give, but it was not to be. Sari was resolved and that feeling was only further cemented by the fact that Auberon was in complete agreement with him.

Eventually, Eli had tried a new tactic; friendship and denial. He socialized with Sari in public, among mutual friends and year-mates, and claimed to harbor no leftover affections for the Herald. Sari could only hope that one day the Healer would actually begin to believe it himself. Until then, he treaded lightly around him, and never sought out his company except for medicinal reasons.

At least he’s stopped saving himself for you, Auberon teased.

“I was thinking more along the lines of mechanics. We’re going on Companion-back,” Sari pointed out aloud. “Horses don’t travel as fast or for as long as Companions.”

“Well then, you’re going to have to make do. If this mission is successful, than the Errold’s Grove healers are going to need help. As far as I know, there’s only one or two up there, so it’s not as if I completely invited myself along. Even though I did,” Eli added with a shrug.

I can’t believe Elspeth went along with this. This is Firesong we’re talking about here, Sari told Auberon. Am I wrong? I thought they were close! How could she want this delayed even a few days?

He’s going to come anyway. We can’t just leave him behind on the road to fend for himself, the Companion reminded him. And he has a point.

Sari knew it, but did it have to be Eli?

Now he did sigh. “We’re leaving early tomorrow.”

“I know. I’ll be ready,” Eli replied, flashing him a grin. It was that grin that had first drawn Sari to him, but now it had no special charms.

“Well. His Majesty here needs a drink,” Sari said, rolling his eyes.

I’m not thirsty.

Eli nodded as Sari physically led Auberon past him and down the field.

Just whose side are you on?

*****

Sidra did her best not to listen in on the heated conversation that the Companion Auberon and his Chosen were having down on the other end of the stable. At least she had managed to shield herself from the actual words being passed back and forth, even if completely shielding her Empathy had not worked. Both of their emotions were frantic and erratic, and she had to go against all of her training and instincts not to go to them to soothe what she could.

When Elspeth had informed her that they would be the ones to travel with her on the mission, Jereth had pointed them out, and Sidra had recognized the Herald at once. He was a rare sight; she could count on one hand the amount of times she’d Felt him in Haven. He’d been in the Shrine only a few days ago, and had left abruptly after she had interrupted his meditation.

The encounter puzzled her a bit. It hadn’t at the time, but Altra had asked her why she had spoken to Sari in Karsite and not Valdermarian, and that had got her thinking. As honed as her senses were, there was really no way she could tell a person’s nationality by their emotions and auras, not unless they gave themselves away with classic reactions, but even that was unreliable. Sidra could tell a Shin’a’in by the way they relaxed around horses, but the Palace stablehands had the same reaction. There was once a Rethwellan delegate who gave himself away at once by his reaction to a pair of shaych Guards, but then half the city was prejudiced against those pairings.

A person could argue that it was a common mistake to simply assume that anyone praying or meditating in the Sun Shrine would be Karsite. Yet, Sidra was often present when the Queen’s Own Talia, who was also a Sunpriest, was performing her duties in the Shrine. Going on that alone, Sidra would not have been able to tell the difference between Talia and Sidra’s heart-uncle Karal—their emotional states in the Shrine were close enough that both could have been taken as Karsite, but of the two, the Karsite was Karal. Sidra could not claim ignorance to that.

Sidra had made a mistake of assumption that had turned out not to be a mistake at all, but it still left her feeling uneasy. There was simply no explanation for it. Not one she could think of anyway.

What have I missed here?, she asked Jereth, mildly irritated.

I couldn’t tell you, he answered honestly.

I’m not a novice. I’m not a Trainee. I’m not even a green Herald!

The very wisest.

I’m very confused.

You’ll figure it out, he assured her, lipping a lock of her hair.

She didn’t even bother to brush him away; they’d been together for far too long for her to ever break him of the habit. Her only retaliation was to tap the tips of her fingers up his nose, something that never failed to give him what children called “ghost tingles”, but even that hardly worked. He would back off… for a few minutes.

I have to go, she told him, reluctantly pulling away. I promised Freia I would help her pack. She wants to make sure I know where everything is.

I know hertasi don’t travel well, but I’m honestly surprised she did not demand to go with you, Jereth said.

I think she wanted to and talked herself out of it. Interns don’t have hertasi tagging along with them. Besides, who would watch my things? She cupped his cheeks in her hands and planted a kiss right in between his eyes. I will see you tomorrow.

Sidra made her way out of the stall and down towards the entrance. She stopped only once to visit one of the unChosen Companion fillies; she was about to foal and was nervous. Sidra soothed her fears and reassured her that even though Sidra would not be there, she was in good hands. No one would think to leave her alone when she was so close, and besides, there were other more capable ‘midwives’ than Sidra herself.

With that done, she left the stable, the Companions, and Herald Sari behind.