|Their First Christmas
Author: Elise Davidson PM
JD/Cox/Jordan. It wasn't surprising that Perry hated Christmas. What they didn't get was why JD took off on Christmas eve. Their first Christmas, and how not everything goes according to plan. T for kissing/OT3.Rated: Fiction T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Words: 4,344 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12-21-09 - Status: Complete - id: 5598368
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Title: Their First Christmas
Warnings: Angst, Slash, Threesome
Author's Notes: Merry Christmas, folks! And no real sex in this one…mostly just h/c. Enjoy!
It was no secret that Perry hated Christmas. The act and show was good for Jenny and Jack, who waited patiently for Santa to come the hand-drawn chimney that JD had produced for them (he had gotten the idea when Izzy had asked how Santa would come into the apartment 'cause the furnace wasn't nearly big enough for him and Turk had drawn it on the wall, much to Carla's amusement).
The big secret was that JD did hate Christmas. He hadn't used to, he told Perry idly at one point, while lying in bed. But now…well, it was just another day full of accidents, drunks, losers, heartburn, suicide attempts and drunk drivers who had one too many.
Perry hadn't said anything, though some small part of him was disappointed that JD was putting on the same forced act for Sam that he had been putting on for Jack and Jenny. Still, he chucked it up to just a bad day for JD and left it alone. It wasn't any of his business.
Still, as the day drew closer, Perry inspected his apartment. JD hadn't put up any decorations, and the kids had decorated most of the tree. One of them had managed to talk them into the stupid star that now shone brightly from the top, as if to mock their lack of Christmas spirit.
At the moment, Sam, Jenny and Jack (ages 5, 5 and 9 respectively) were currently watching Rudolph on the television, the grainy claymation bringing back old, ugly memories for Perry.
Perry poured a glass of scotch at that, and left the kids to their own devices to find JD. "Newbie? Where are you hiding?"
He poked around the apartment, which was only so big, until he found JD sitting on the bed, laptop open and textbook beside of him as he balanced a notebook in his lap and scribbled furiously.
"You're missing the glory that is claymation," Perry said irritably. "The kids are going to wonder where you're at."
"I don't do Rudolph," JD mumbled, eyes fixed on the laptop screen. "And I'm busy."
Perry frowned. It wasn't like him to be so abrupt. With a long-suffering sigh, Perry cautiously sat down beside of him, looking over the medical journal that JD currently studied.
"Tay-Sachs? What are you looking at?" Perry asked with a frown.
"I've got a patient at Vincent's who's in the ICU. I'm looking at some experimental gene therapy," JD retorted.
"The research? Not old; it was just—"
"The patient, Newbie," Perry interrupted. "How old is the patient?"
JD stared at him, eyes glittering in the light of the laptop. "Five."
"Infantile Tay-Sachs and just hit five? Newbie, you know what the chances are of you getting your hands on an experimental gene therapy in time."
"Someone has to try. We can't just throw these kids away," JD pointed out, though he knew how hollow that sounded.
"Kid's lucky to have made it to five," Perry retorted harshly, reaching forward to pull the laptop shut. "Let the parents try and have their one last holiday and let it go."
JD snorted and pulled the laptop open again. "Parents abandoned him when they found out he had Tay-Sachs."
Perry hated how he felt only a mild twinge of anger at that. "There's nothing you can do about that."
"I'm going to work," JD finally muttered. "I can't concentrate here." He kissed Perry quickly on the mouth and began gathering his jacket and other things.
Perry watched him quietly. "You shouldn't put yourself through this kind of hell, Newbie. You can't help him and the best thing you can do is let him die and not be by his side."
"I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't," JD replied angrily. "If I'm not there, then who will be? If I am there, it's gonna stay with me the rest of my life. Either way, I'm not going to forget this kid. Let it go and let me do things my own way."
Perry grabbed his upper arms and stared at him. "Not being there is a hell of a lot less painful."
JD shrugged. "I never did things the easy way." He slid from Perry's grasp and began the round of good-byes to the kids.
Jordan returned from her mother's just as JD was exiting the apartment. He gave her his usual kiss (sans any real emotion) and shut the door behind him. Jordan quirked an eyebrow at Perry, who watched the scene with a hard gaze.
"What's his problem and what did you do?" Jordan asked quietly so the kids wouldn't hear her angry voice.
Sam, however, perked up and looked behind him. "Shh!" he hissed. "We're watchin' Rudolph!"
Jordan rubbed his head affectionately, smiling amusingly when he batted her hand away from the dark strands. He lay out on his stomach with Jack on one side and Jenny on the other as they watched the island of misfits.
Perry gestured Jordan into the kitchen. "I didn't do anything; why do you always think it's my fault?" he muttered, pouring them both a cup of coffee.
"It usually is your fault," Jordan retorted smartly, taking the offered mug. "It's Christmas eve, why's he going to work?"
"Special case," Perry mumbled, looking into the black coffee. "I don't think he could stay away."
Jordan pursed her lips. "Like hell. You can take care of the stockings and gifts, right?"
"Shh!" Perry hissed. "You know all three of them still believe."
Jordan rolled her eyes. "Just take care of it, Santa. I'll be back with JD later."
"What makes you think you can bring him home?" Perry grumbled, not looking forward to playing Santa Claus.
He hated cookies.
Jordan shrugged. "He's afraid of me. We'll be home later."
Perry was the one who sighed through pursed lips now. "We should both go, don't you think?" he finally asked.
Jordan snorted. "So you can piss him off even more? No. And we're not dropping the kids off with Elliot or Carla or Kim, so stop that train now before I do."
Perry rolled his eyes. "Alright, just be home before four, will you? Jack woke up at three last year."
"And he knows this year to give the coffee out before he comes jumping on the bed."
"Well, that and to knock." Perry gave an unexpected grin and kissed her forehead. "It's a really special case, Jordan. You think you can take this?"
Jordan nodded quickly. "After all the crap you've pulled over my eyes at your dump-slash-hospital, I think I'll be fine." She kissed his cheek. "Make sure and read the night before Christmas before they go to bed. And let Jenny and Sam help with the cookies and milk."
"I hate cookies and milk," Perry muttered, but didn't protest further.
"I'm going to go back to Grandma Sullivan's to get something I forgot," Jordan said to the kids, who were sitting up now to get a better look at the claymation Santa.
"See, I told you my daddy's related to him," Jack said proudly. "Blue eyes!"
"Like that means Uncle Perry's related," Jenny said smartly. "Just means they have blue eyes, dummy."
"Hey, no name-calling," Perry said sharply. "Or you'll find coal in the morning."
That immediately shut all three of them up and Jordan kissed their heads as a means of good bye. She shot Perry a look, and then left the apartment.
When Jordan arrived at St. Vincent's, she walked along the unfamiliar hospital hallways. It wasn't that terribly different from Sacred Heart, she supposed, just different. The smells were still the same (she was hard-pressed to figure out how Perry or JD had gotten used to that fecal, throw-up smell that lay beneath all of the antiseptic), and it was just as cold as the other.
She walked quickly with her head up, though she wasn't sure which floor JD worked on. She did, however, know which floor that Kim worked on. And since she happened to know for a fact that Kim was working (which was why Sam was over in the first place), she headed to the fifth floor.
After all, it'd be a hell of a lot easier to find JD if she was being escorted by a fellow staffer.
Jordan waited impatiently in the elevator, a bit of anger growing as she did. It wasn't like DJ to simply take off on Christmas Eve, even for work. She had been married to Perry for so long, that it hadn't seemed odd till she remembered it was DJ, not Perry, that was avoiding the holiday.
It turned out she didn't have to look far for Kim, who was apparently waiting for the elevator.
Kim raised an eyebrow at her. "What are you doing here?"
"I'd ask you the same thing, but I've got two dicks I already can't take care of, so I'll abstain," Jordan replied breezily as she walked out. "Where's DJ?"
"I thought he was back with you and Dr. Cox," Kim said with a frown. "I can't imagine what he'd be doing here."
"He said something about a special patient," Jordan replied. "Look, it's Christmas Eve, and I still have a few presents to wrap and stockings to stuff at some point since Per-bear can't touch stockings without burning himself with bad memories. You want to just tell me where he'd be?"
"Special patient?" Kim asked again. "All of his patients are special." She frowned again. "He doesn't really…you could check the ICU, I suppose."
Jordan held up a hand. "Which floor, do I need a key, help me out here."
"Yeah, come on." Kim entered the elevator with Jordan, who looked unhappy at the prospect of waiting more. "He was talking to the geneticist earlier today, I heard." Her face suddenly froze in dawning. "Oh, that special case."
"What special case?"
"Five year old, has Tay-Sachs," Kim said in clipped tones. "No parents; he's probably going to die in the next few hours or so."
"What in god's name is Tay-Sachs?" Jordan asked irritably.
"Serious genetic disorder," Kim replied. "Kids usually die by the age of four. It's miraculous this kid lived that long."
Jordan didn't say anything else as Kim led her through the hallways and swiped her badge to be let into the ICU.
"He'll be in room 698," Kim said quietly. "Are you sure you want to go after him? I can go get him for you."
Jordan waved her off. "Beat it. Thanks for bringing me up." She headed into the quiet ward, long-used to the familiar beeping and quiet staff running around the vent patients. She eyed the room numbers instead of looking at signs, following the rising and lowering numbers until she found room 698.
Sure enough, JD was in there. He was sitting beside the bed, legs balanced on the thin mattress. A small Christmas tree was blinking merrily on the nightstand, with fake boxes underneath it for good cheer's sake.
The boy in the bed didn't look as if he were five; he looked three because of the lack of growth. Tubes were running everywhere from him, and it was hard to tell what color his hair was because his head had been shaved. Wires and electrodes were stuck obscenely to his scalp, and his eyes were eerily open, staring blankly at nothing. Occasionally, his hand would twitch or his toes would move. He made odd gurgling noises behind the trachea tube in his throat, and there was a long feeding tube running from his stomach.
Jordan felt slightly sick at the sight, but persevered. She entered the room quietly, glad that she had worn ballet flats instead of heels or sneakers.
JD seemed to sense her presence though. "You didn't have to see this. You could've paged me."
"Your pager was at the apartment," Jordan replied quietly. "Who's this?"
"Paul Callahan," JD said in the same quiet tone, though the boy in the bed didn't seem to know people were around him. "Tay-Sachs."
"Kim gave me the breakdown," Jordan replied and scooted a chair quietly beside of JD. "Why are you doing this to yourself, DJ?" She sighed irritably, leaning back in the chair and balancing her feet on the bed beside of JD's. "All the kids are at the apartment, Perry and I are there. Why be here on Christmas eve?"
"Because Paul doesn't and never had any of that," JD forced out. "He should have someone besides a faceless nurse who could give half a shit as long as he goes quietly."
"You know that's not how the nurses feel about it," Jordan pointed out tiredly. She had spent the majority of the day with her own family, which tended to exhaust her with old memories of Ben, and what Ben would do if he were there. Combining that with Danni having broken into the liquor cabinet a shade after two pm, and Jordan was ready to snap by five, and had made it to eight before she'd headed back to the apartment. "What's this really about?"
"It's about him," JD said bitingly, trying not to raise his voice. "He doesn't have anyone beside of him tonight, and he's going to die, and no one's going to care because they abandoned him to some catholic church when he was six months old because he couldn't roll over."
Jordan quietly listened as JD talked, memories resurfacing from his mouth eventually about other bad experiences, until he seemed to have worn himself out. She gently leaned his head on her shoulder, stroking his shoulder. She wasn't good at feeling the comfort, but she sure as hell knew when someone needed it.
"I just…I don't know if I can do this; I can't do anything for him. I tried to talk the geneticist here into getting him into a drug trial, but his disease is too far gone and he's too old. He's five, for Christ's sake."
Jordan sighed. Nothing she could think of to say was going to make him feel better, and so she said nothing.
The time passed by slowly, the only sound in the room the beeping of Paul's monitors and the faint strains of soft Christmas music filtering through the ICU.
"Dr. Dorian?" a nurse asked quietly when the clock had crept to two AM. "Father Callahan is here to see Paul."
JD raised his tired, bloodshot eyes from Jordan's shoulder. "Pulling out?"
The nurse nodded apologetically. "Sister Mary Katherine is here too. I can get the on-call resident to do this."
"No, I've got it." JD wiped the sleep from his eyes and tried to pull the devastation from his heart that they were giving up on the boy. But even he knew at this point that there was nothing else to be done.
A priest and nun came quietly into the room. JD spoke with them quietly; Jordan couldn't hear the words that transpired.
"Jordan, you can step out," JD said. "Patient-doctor confidentiality. I'll be out in a minute."
Jordan wanted to stay, surprised herself at how much she wanted to be there to support him. When she, Perry and DJ had gotten together seven months ago, she didn't think she'd ever want to be there for anything other than sex.
She had been wrong.
Jordan stepped out quietly and pretended she didn't hear the priest and nun saying prayers, didn't hear the beeping as it slowed down to a crawl and eventually whined. She waited in silence for DJ, who finally came out about a half hour later, his face pale and freshly washed. His breath smelled faintly of mint, and the scruff on his jaw was thicker than ever.
"Ready?" Jordan asked.
"Let's go home," JD finally said, pulling an arm around her shoulder and gave her a somewhat surprised stare when she not only let him, but slid an arm around his waist.
"Merry Christmas, DJ," Jordan said, leaning her head on his shoulder, unexpectedly needing to take comfort from him even though she was sure he hadn't any to give her. She was proven wrong again when he kissed her head and nuzzled her hair a little in the elevator.
"Merry Christmas, Jordan."
Perry had just finished Jack's stocking (with Jenny and Sam's left to go) when the door opened with a click. He looked up grumpily at JD and Jordan, but the growling greeting slipped away when he saw the pallor of JD's face and the warning look on Jordan's face.
"Hey, Carol," Perry finally said quietly and held up the tray of sugar cookies. "Wanna eat these for me?"
"Who doesn't like cookies," JD muttered, the first thing he'd really said since the boy's death at the hospital. He grabbed a few and handed one to Jordan, who glared at him.
"You're ruining my diet," she grumbled, but took it and bit off the head of the gingerbread man with relish.
"Man-eater," Perry said to JD, who nodded in agreement. His face was still pale, and the boy's loss was still heavy in his eyes, but the small smile on his face was real.
"Oh, you're doing it wrong," Jordan hissed quietly, and grabbed Jenny's stocking from him.
JD picked off Sam's, gently filling it as Perry carted in more presents for the children (and, unbeknownst to Jordan or JD, gifts for them too). JD stepped out a few times to grab things from the linen closet (lost as well on Jordan and Perry) and Jordan had quietly stolen away to sneak in things from her closet (which Perry and JD steadfastly refused to go near, saying they were gay enough, thank you, without having to step into a woman's closet).
"Christmas is exhausting," JD murmured as he finally flopped on the bed. Jordan slipped in beside of him, sugar still sweet on both their mouths.
Perry came in, wiping off a milk moustache. "I can't believe you two ate those cookies." He sat down on the side of the bed, glaring at the clock which told him 4:43 AM. "And Jack's going to be bounding up any minute now."
"He gets that from Dan," JD said absently as Jordan wrapped an arm around JD's hip, her soft snores already filling into the room. "Dan couldn't wake up to save his own life year-round, but on Christmas and Easter, he was up at four."
"Dan's also a selfish little jerk sometimes," Perry pointed out, feeling JD pull at him to lay down. "There's no use trying to sleep, Newbie. The kids are gonna be up any minute."
"Who said anything about sleep?" JD replied, running his mouth quickly across Perry's neck. "I want a merry Christmas."
Perry pushed down the arousal that rose in his belly and poked Jordan's arm. "You, spawn of Satan. You're always up for sex. Get him off of me."
"Don't be an old fogy," Jordan replied sleepily. "Just give him a blowjob so we get a few minutes of sleep, and then we'll play later when the kids are at my mom's house." She turned on her other side. "And don't shake the bed."
JD looked at Perry almost pleadingly. "Please?" He leaned in close and brushed his lips teasingly over Perry's mouth. "I'll make it worth your while."
Perry grumbled a bit, and pulled him in for a proper kiss. When he felt a hand that was definitely not his or JD's wrapping around his waist, he glanced over at Jordan, who was grinning at him.
"Thought you were going to sleep, Elphaba. I know you need to build your resistance to the cold water that is snow before you burn yourself to death," Perry said amusingly.
Jordan shrugged. "DJ's playing footsies with me while kissing you. I figured he wasn't going to let up till I joined in."
Perry rolled his eyes, and bit at JD's collarbone, meeting Jordan's mouth over the younger man's shoulder. "Unfair, nubile one. And here I thought I always taught you to play fairly."
"Like hell you did," JD muttered, hooking a leg over Perry's hip and turning his head to plant a kiss on Jordan's pliant mouth.
"Daddy!" a voice wailed from the hallway. "Coffee's on! Get up, it's Christmas!"
"Shh, Sam! They're probably kissing or something," came Jack's disgusted voice.
"But we can't open anything till they get up," Jennifer's voice pointed out irritably. "You got us up. Get Mommy and Daddy and Uncle JD up."
A pounding came on the door next. "Careful, you'll spill it!" Sam squawked.
JD groaned, rubbing against Perry, who had reached over to tangle his hand in Jordan's hair. Jordan was half-way through straddling JD when Jack jiggled the doorknob.
Another pained wail alerted them all, and Jordan was on her feet. Sure enough, Jack had spilled hot coffee over his hands, and Sam, trying to help him, had picked up the hot mugs.
Jennifer was looking at them both as if they were stupid.
Jordan rolled her eyes as Perry joined her and looked over Jack's hands critically. "Bet that hurts, buddy," he said affectionately, holding Jack's hands carefully.
"Sammy, it's okay," JD said softly, kissing Sammy's reddened hands.
"He was tryin' to get you coffee," Jennifer said. "And he knocked on the door with the mug."
Jordan rolled her eyes and scooped up Jenny. "Come on, missy. Let's get some wet towels for the boys, okay?"
Jenny nodded. "Stupid boys," she mumbled.
"I know, sweetie," Jordan said with a smile and tapped her nose.
Much later into the day and at the end of the night, JD fell away into bed, absolutely exhausted once more. It had been a decent Christmas, all in all, and his first with Jordan and Perry, who were surprisingly cheerful. He simply thought it was for the kids' benefit, but even when they were busy and playing with new toys, Jordan had plopped a gift bow on Perry's head and he'd hooked an ornament into JD's sweater.
Jordan came in first, sitting on the bed next to JD. "You look terrible," she said bluntly. "Not enough coffee?"
JD laughed hoarsely. "Too much fun, too much Christmas. I feel like I could sleep for a million years."
Jordan pouted, though it was more alluring than childish, and JD sat up to kiss the look from her face. She made a long "hmm" sound into his mouth, leaning him back and straddling his hips once more.
Perry opened the door to that, raising an eyebrow as he shut it and locked it behind him. "You two can't go five minutes without sex, I swear."
"You're just jealous 'cause you wish you were on top," Jordan threw back. "Kids down?"
"Yeah," Perry replied and slid in behind Jordan, sitting on his knees on top of JD's shins. He kissed the back of her neck, sliding a hand beneath her to run up JD's thigh through his thin cords.
JD mumbled something unintelligible, lying his head back and trying to soak up the feeling. Jordan leaned down on top of him, wrapping her arms around his neck and leaning them to the side so they were both lying on their ribs.
Perry slipped behind JD, kneading his shoulders gently. JD felt something vaguely being slipped over his head, and he reached up to feel it. It was fuzzy. With a ball on the end.
"No, I'm so not wearing a Santa during sex; it's creepy," JD said instantly, and pulled it off. "Only Jordan could pull that off."
Jordan scoffed. "You're too cute. He thinks he has a say in what he gets to wear. Just like you, Per-per!" she said, poking Perry's chest.
Perry rolled his eyes. "Funny how you two were ready to go at it until I came in the room."
"Buzzkill," JD muttered, and turned to face Perry, pressing his chest and hips against the older man's. "Come on…I want my Merry Christmas."
Perry looked at him, noting that the spirit had returned to JD's face and finally relaxing a little at that. Jordan seemed to notice it too, and leaned in to nip at JD's vertebra.
"Merry Christmas, Newbie," Perry murmured against JD's mouth, sliding a hand over his hip and feeling Jordan's hand connect with it.
"You too." JD sighed contentedly as Jordan slipped his shirt off and the real fun began.
Author's Notes: All together now: AWWWWW! I had intended to write smut, but this is where it went. Unbeta'd, unedited, etc. Hope you enjoyed!
Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah, Happy Kwanzaa, and merry holidays in general!