|We Own the Night
Author: DeniBear PM
A/U. New Moon Era. It's been five months since the Cullens left her and Bella's perspective on life has finally changed. She's moving on with the help of Angela, who seems to be harboring a dark secret. Femslash. Bella/Angela. Full Summary insideRated: Fiction M - English - Romance/Horror - Bella & Angela - Chapters: 6 - Words: 29,778 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 91 - Updated: 04-02-10 - Published: 03-15-10 - id: 5819602
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
We Own The Night
Six: Better than Her
Rated: M(For Language, Violence, and Sexuality)
Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, Stephanie Meyer takes the credit.
Author's Note: Thank you guys for your patience, I got caught up with the flu and didn't have the strength to write while I was out. I apologize, but here's the next chapter. If you guys are curious as to how Angela looks in her wolf form, a picture of her in said form is on my profile. Just a warning, this is mixed with a bit of angst and a pissed off Bella that leads her to doing a really stupid thing. Can you guess what that stupid thing is? Oh and Angie is pretty mean in this chapter. You'll see why.
Angela's Point of View:
The transformation was nothing like I had ever felt before in my entire life and the process was absolutely excruciating. I didn't expect for it to happen so soon but the pack anticipated it the night I went to sleep over at Leah's house. Nothing out of the ordinary happened during the day, for which I was truly grateful since my friends at school kept pestering me about the significant changes that took over me. Yes, I developed an extremely short temper and a very high sex drive but Emily assured me that the immeasurable amount of rage that swelled up within me over the littlest of things would go away after I phased a few more times. As for the sex drive, uh, unfortunately, I would be assaulted with explicit images of Bella and I partaking in overly rough and hot, violent sex until I imprinted on her... Ahem. I'm not that kind of girl though.
Or at least I never used to be, anyway. This was going to be far more difficult to handle than I imagined because the sex drive would continue to punish me at the worst possible of times. At school, especially, during gym when Bella would release her scent with her sweat and it would drive me insane with desire every time without failure. Or during dinner with my family when I'm simply trying to eat, a powerful jolt of arousal would strike me between my thighs out of freaking nowhere and I would have to squeeze my thighs tightly as I forcefully bite my tongue to keep from screaming out Bella's name in front of my father, who is blissfully ignorant of my sexuality. My mother, however, is very supportive but she can only watch with sad expressive eyes as I continued fighting the baggage that comes with being a horny as fuck, ill tempered werewolf. In Jacob's words, a pup basically.
The desperate need for sex was the least of my problems, however. That night that I spent with my entire pack, I could feel the transformation taking place within my body and the transition was so very uncomfortable. There was a full moon that night and it was like I was suddenly struck with a virus or something because one minute I'm wrestling with Seth Clearwater, and the next I'm down on my knees with the little boy I considered a younger sibling holding my hair up as I vomited a white liquid substance that burned my throat to the core. When I finally stopped, Leah pulled Seth out of the way just in time when I aggressively shot up from where I knelt and howled like a wolf. The ache began throbbing against my skull before it consumed my entire body and let me tell you, it hurt like hell.
I was clenching my stomach painfully and tried to find something to hold onto but nothing could ease the anxiety shooting through me. Oh god, the worst part of the evolution took place first and it began with my teeth. You ever hear the expression that people would rather give birth ten times over to whales than ever get a root canal? Well, I just made that one up right now but that's exactly what was running through my mind when I felt my entire jaw transforming into something else entirely. It was horrible but somehow I bore it all when I saw with my every own eyes that I had just formed a muzzle. My canines were very large and impressive but were so very sore and I cried the entire time I was changing because my teeth still hurt more than anything else. When it came to my legs, the muscles bulged out and I ripped my shorts and panties as they became really powerful hind wolf legs. My arms practically exploded and the only thing that didn't bother me most about the whole thing was the sudden appearance of fur.
It was a beautiful multicolored coat, mainly black with grey and white silky tips but then again, something else startled the life out of me a few moments after I realized I was a werewolf. I wasn't walking around Leah Clearwater's property on all four of my legs; oh no, I was much larger than I actually thought I was and discovered that I could walk(more like stumble around at first) like I would in my human form. I risked glancing in front of me and found that that muscular creature-like arms in front of me were my own. I rolled my hands -or paws, claws, whatever the fuck they were-into fists and whimpered as if I had been a puppy who had just gotten kicked hard. This wasn't normal, I was supposed to look like Leah or Jacob, I wasn't supposed to stand and walk carefully around like an accident prone giant. This was terrifying and I wanted to cry but couldn't; the monster within me roared with anger and I just started sprinting towards the woods though I was supposed to wait for either Sam or Paul to phase so they could help me out.
They phased immediately it seemed, all of them with the exception of Seth, and they followed me out to God only knows where I was trying to head. It felt like I could fly in this abominable form, I was sprinting really fucking fast and silently and I just had to revel for a little bit knowing that fact. When I did stop running, I crouched down for a moment and took in my surroundings; I was back in Forks in the middle of a beautiful meadow where I looked above me and saw the most beautiful thing in the world aside from Bella's face; the full naked gleaming moon. It was my deity and I had to worship it somehow so I knelt for a minute before I howled menacingly into the night sky. I was interrupted when I heard other familiar howls behind me and for a brief second, I couldn't recognize them until it was Sam's fearless thoughts that appeased me.
They were all very dangerous looking, giant werewolves yet there was something about the sight of them together like this that screamed my true family. Sam approached me cautiously, and it almost intimidated me that just like himself, the men behind him were far more terrifying and grotesque looking than the women were. Was it designed like that to frighten off the vampires and innocent citizens who happened to wander in the wrong clearing at the wrong time? He bowed respectfully like a gentleman and the rest followed suit, and I hesitated for only a second before something inside of me snapped and told me to return the gesture. It turned out that voice was my human self, Angela, and she was just as bossy as the wolf Angela was. From the grunts I heard, I could tell the rest of the pack were laughing at something…somehow.
When Sam's voice could be heard in my mind, I almost freaked out but I remembered from Leah that this was how the pack communicated whenever we were in wolf form. It sucked that they could pretty much read into your mind whenever they could but if we were supposed to stay a family that vowed to protect the citizens of Forks from filthy leeches like the Cullens, then so be it. I could handle all the taunting and teasing I would get from the boys once they um, explore the parts of my dirty mind involving all the sexy times I wish Bella and I would have already. Ugh…Bella, if she knew that I could turn into this hideous thing, would she turn me away? I don't want to corrupt her like that tenacious blond parasite did…Maybe I can fight the imprint for awhile until it eventually fades away. I just can't willingly believe that she would openly accept this, it's not right…
As the night wore on, I learned that I would stay in this form for the next twenty four hours and it was very vital for me to exhaust myself during the day and everybody didn't mind calling in or missing school just to make sure that my needs were met. God, I loved them even though it's been a short amount of time. Leah and Jacob were officially my best friends as they taught me many different techniques to blend in with the shadows in the forest in order to keep myself hidden from the human eye. We may have looked like rabid pissed off monsters ready to eat human beings like the werewolves did in the movie but fuck, when you were with others who were like family, we were playful, horny, aggressive creatures. Too many times I caught Leah thinking about how much she wanted Jacob to f-fuck her and Jacob would hear and would mount her from behind though I would stop them before anything…disgusting took place. Jacob growled lightly and called me a twat swat in his mind and I was confused. What the fuck was that?
It was still pretty early in the morning, I couldn't exactly tell since you know, oversized wolves walking on their hind legs don't often wear watches or carry their cell phones with them. But it was just one of those days where I felt myself longing for Bella and thinking to myself how I should tell her to fuck off at the same time. I sound like a real asshole here, but there were so many emotions running rampant through my heart, it was difficult to reign them all on a leash. It was going to rain, I could smell it in the air, the wonderful aroma of rainfall mixed with forest teasing me beautifully and all I wanted to do was lay on the grass and bask in it all day. But I couldn't. My plan to rest momentarily was ruined when I heard her from far away, the sound of a familiar beat up truck's engine and my heart raced wildly. She was near, and I could feel strings pulling me to her but then, I heard voices that wanted to deny me my happiness.
"Angela, don't go near her when you're like this! You could really snap and do something you'll regret. While it's not uncommon for some uh, wolves to mate with humans when they're still phased(Ew, Paul! We're not into that kinky immoral bestiality shit), it's fucking dangerous. Ignore her calls to you!" The voices pleaded and the human voice inside of me spoke gently, trying to convince me that it would be safer to leave her alone until we were in school. I am not going to ignore my mate any longer, she beckons me and I will take her whether or not my human self wants it or not! So I flew past all of them, though they predictably followed and attempted to attack me, only provoking me further into finally finding her and marking her as mine.
Half an hour later, I forcefully submitted to Emily, who was much stronger than I thought, but they agreed to follow Bella's scent so they could at least make up for the bruises, cuts, and sprained wrists I would wake up to later on in my human form. When I smelled her near me, I almost lost it again because she was wet from the rain and when the paralyzing scent that was Bella's mixed with rainfall, I was…in decent terms, horny again. I howled out of loneliness, which definitely alerted all of the girls Bella accompanied during this innocent hike of theirs. So they ran for it and I chased while they may or may not have noticed how I was closely tailing Bella on purpose. She eventually fell and begged for Jessica's help while she tossed Lauren her keys. I knew she could see me, I wanted her to see me but what she didn't realize was that she had locked eyes with me the entire time. I was absolutely in love with her but the moment that harlot Jessica Stanley lifted her off the ground and held her close as I howled, I wanted to kill her.
It didn't help that the rest of the pack surrounded the three horrified girls by the time they finally reached their vehicles but we wouldn't intentionally harm them. Well, at least two of them for me. I was being restrained by all the voices going off in my head, telling me to stay away until I turned human again but I was reluctant. All I wanted to do was tackle Bella and make love to her, mark my territory, and then fuck her again until her legs could no longer work. So I was holding back a lot of emotions when I growled possessively at Jessica, whose dirty hands could not stay off of Bella long enough. The human self told me it was irrational to feel this way when we haven't confessed our feelings to her and we had to wait until we could see her again to explain what was going on. I had to listen, because I realized that I did not ever want to see that scared look on my Bella ever again…
After the crucial twenty four hours finally passed, I was taken home by Quil and Embry because these guys were strong enough to restrain me if I were to phase again. I didn't sleep all that well at night because that damned high sex drive was affecting me as I lay in bed totally exhausted. I thrashed and writhed underneath the heavy weight of my own blankets as these filthy pornographic movies played behind my closed eyelids. In each fantasy, and I was pretty sure the wolf form of myself contributed to most of these, I had Bella in her beautiful nude form submit to me in the most sexiest of ways. She got on all fours on my bed and she spread her legs wide enough as she gave me a very seductive once over before bracing for a thorough pounding that immediately followed. That fantasy shook me to the core in all honesty.
How could I possibly get away with all these delusions of debauching my best friend, who may not reciprocate the strong romantic, sexual feelings I feel towards her? It was wrong, just wrong and I cannot lead myself on to believe that Bella and I were meant for each other since I am…a monster. It's not like I'm ashamed of who I am, contrary to popular belief, it's just that I cannot justify a relationship of any kind with Isabella Swan, who indeed was tarnished by a vampire. Yes, I've always been hurt by the fact that she was no longer a pure virgin because I always imagined that it could have been me that she gave it to. I would have given her all of me as well but when she's already been touched by another but far more disgusting creature, it turns the wolf inside of me off sometimes when I think about it. Other times, I imagine Bella fisting me using the hand that has been marked by the vampire so I could come all over it, claiming my territory in such a savage manner.
I hung my head in shame. There was no way I could taint Bella far more than she has been already, she deserves to lead a very human life without me in the way. As long as that bitch Rosalie was out of the picture, I could be happy for her. Or at least I could try since the wolf part of me still yearns for Bella's love. This, along with many other aspects of my life, would prove to be difficult because jealousy(an emotion that was almost foreign to me) really knows how to control me when I don't want it to. As much as I keep telling myself that staying away from Bella would be a selfless thing to do, it didn't help that other people were allowed the chance to get close to my human mate. Jessica Stanley, no matter how heterosexual she was, pissed me off more than anything because she was always so goddamn touchy with Swan. Which leads to my current situation: I'm at school in a rather foul, exhausted mood again and everybody was pissing me off.
We were in the cafeteria and of course, I'm still taking in the events that took place the other night after I transformed for the first time. Then out of nowhere, everyone's dumping their mindless high school bullshit on me and it's overwhelming to the point I can already feel my blood boiling. From Jessica ranting about boys and how she wants Mike to ask her out already like a desperate slut to Lauren complaining about my annoying silence and unwillingness to contribute to the situation, I've about had it until Bella makes it all so very worse. She's smiling at me as she leans forward to gently caress a side of my face but when her skin makes contact with mine, an electrical current runs through the both of us and it's so powerful that a spark is formed. Literally.
She gasps and pulls her hand away from me, much to my inner possessive wolf's dismay, and stares at me with a dumbfounded expression. That innocent look on her face tells me how much I shouldn't want her for my own selfish purposes but my inner wolf howls with depression at the thoughts that I force feed my mind and heart. She deserved better than Rosalie, much better than her, but I was a monster all the same in a different form. I couldn't have her, and I won't; she needs to grow and live a normal life. So I muster up all the confidence I possibly could and a scowl forms on my face. I'm simply conveying a message that I'm dangerous and that I was no good for her. With that, she actually looks offended and starts mouthing off again.
"Angela, what was that? I don't know what's going on with you but you're really freaking me the fuck out with all these changes. What's wrong with you?" She asks almost hesitantly but there's still a challenge lurking behind those beautiful eyes of hers and I can't surrender to her, not when I've already started the mission of rejecting my imprint. It was physically painful but I could deal with it. I was sure of it. I could tell I was giving off an irritated vibe and I was going to let everyone at this table know how I felt finally. "Is it so unusual for me, Angela Webber, to be going through a phase like a normal teenager(except I wasn't normal)? I recall never once judging any of you when you had all gone through some of the most mediocre, immature, and ridiculous crap ever witnessed by anybody." I spat out, emphasizing that sentence directly to Bella so she could hold onto the pseudo malice in my gaze.
Lauren narrowed her eyes and Jessica was cowering into her seat but she knew I was insulting the prettier brunette next to her. As if she could sway me from my purpose, Jessica said, "Um, Angela, can we not get into this right now? I don't know what crawled up your ass but don't talk to Bella like that." The tone of her voice was weak and soft but her intention was to defend Bella and that was supposed to be my job. Jesus, I hated contradicting myself but blame the wolf inside of me who keeps voicing its opinion when it's not wanted. I briefly glanced at Jessica for a moment, praising whatever God existed out there that Bella could at least hang on to her as a new best friend, and I turned back to Bella who was blushing furiously. "What crawled up my ass, Stanley? Do you really want to know the complicated answers to that retarded question of yours?" I reply, breathing heavily now as my fists were threatening to let loose on everybody around me.
She didn't answer and Lauren wanted to say something but I erupted quite loudly, realizing that there was way too much stress bottled up inside of me. "I've been dealing with your childish shit for my most of my life, Mallory and Stanley, but when Bella's added to the goddamn equation, it just got that much harder to deal with. You bitches always complain about being fat, not looking pretty enough for the disgusting, hormonal boys that run rampant with STD's at this school, and how much you hate getting caught texting in class! You morons have nothing decent to complain about when it's your high school career you should be worried about!" I screamed, venting out all the thoughts that have been formulating in the back of my mind since my freshman year of high school. I know that being a teenager was hard and sometimes it was hard grasping onto what was really important in your life, but damn, these barbies were clueless and annoying as all hell.
I stood up from where I sat and I gave them all a piercing, murderous look before I settled onto Bella, who was unfortunately the only intentional victim in all of this. I pointed at her and everybody in the cafeteria gasped before uncomfortable silence hung in the air again as I blew up on her. "You, I thought you were going to be good one in the group Swan. For once, I thought there was an intelligent girl that I could finally connect with but when you got yourself tangled up in that horrifying, unhealthy, ridiculous relationship with Rosalie fucking Hale, you fell apart. You let that filthy little parasite run your life and look at the mess you've become!" I snarled, my heart compressing into a shriveled, black raisin because I was hurting myself more than I was her.
She stood up from where she sat too and threw off Lauren's restraining arms to shout right back at me like I predicted she would. Her eyes were glossy, tears obviously on the verge from spilling out, and her cheeks were a deep crimson shade. I would miss her expressive face…"What gives you the right to talk to any of us like that, Angela Webber? Did you misplace your tampons or something because you sound like an unbelievable douche bag right now! How dare you bring up something that is so personal to me, you don't know what it was like! So what, I can't express how sad I felt after a breakup from a serious relationship? You're so insensitive!" Oh that comment was ludicrous, I had to put her in her place and make her feel worthless because it was better off that we stayed the hell away from each other from now on. It was for the best.
"Express how you feel, Swan? Please, you were so wrapped up in your pathetic state of mind that Rosalie still loved you that you didn't realize how catatonic you were. You were a goddamn boring zombie that I put up with because I feared you to be the type to cut your fucking veins for somebody who didn't want you! You constantly bitched and moaned about how she dumped you in the woods and you let that whore control you even though she broke it off with you. 'Oh Rose, please come back. I can be good for you.' or remember this? 'Rosalie, you're my sun and you make everything better. I'll be good, please forgive me.'" I mocked, slightly amused by the outrageous expression she now wore on her face. She was redder than a tomato and her eyebrows were furrowed to the point that the lines on her forehead made her seem older than she appeared. It was kind of hot.
She was embarrassed, angry, and was willing to fight with me but the words weren't coming to her fast enough so I continued my tirade in order to push her away from me, for her sake. "God, Bella, I actually thought you were going to kill yourself for that useless cunt and that pissed me off. You changed so much because of her, and you aren't that girl that I found attractive anymore. You gave yourself away to her and look what she did. You're tainted and I don't want you around me anymore. I think it's best we part ways, Isabella, because we deserve happiness in the form of other people. I can live with or without you just fine, but I need you to know that this…friendship, is over. I don't need people like you in my life anymore, I got tired of you a long time ago after you started dating Cullen. " I told her a little more softly, though all of it was a lie and it really, really felt like I was inflicting more pain upon myself because I cringed at the sight of her broken hearted facial expression.
She was really sobbing now, and she was slowly backing away from me before Lauren and Jessica stopped her. It then hit me that during the last part of my speech, it sounded similar to the one Rosalie gave Bella before dumping her like an irresponsible retard. Oh my god, what have I done? So stupid, so fucking stupid! My mouth and tongue continued to move without my consent though and what I said to her must have made her snap back at me finally. "I can't just be your friend while you mope around and wish you and her were still together. It hurts me a lot seeing you like this, but I'm sick of the leftovers. Why can't you move on?" That blunt statement earned me a hard slap across the face though my face stayed in place, and there was hardly any sting to it due to my new strength.
"You…you're…I didn't expect that to c-come from you, why-why are you and Rosalie so alike!? I hate you, stay away from me!" She cries out, slapping me across the face a second time before she turns around and starts sprinting out of the cafeteria. Yeah, apparently I don't like it when people are violent with me because I feel that familiar ache in my jaw again. I was going to phase. Jessica ran after Bella and Lauren was in the middle of deciding whether to go after Bella as well or kick my ass first but I didn't allow her the comfort of making that decision. I abandoned the school, running faster than I could ever imagine as a human as I fled towards the woods in order to hide my phasing. Just as I managed to get out of sight, I felt my body explode into a smaller but faster form of my inner wolf. I was on all fours this time but I didn't have time to think about it; I was running on pure adrenaline and instinct and made my way towards La Push. I was not looking forward to the lectures I surely deserved but damn, I needed to be around my family more than anything.
Bella's Point of View:
I couldn't believe what just happened. Angela ended our friendship, something I wanted to evolve into something more and she screwed everything up! Yeah, I knew something was up after all that time she spent with her new friends and people she considered family back on the reservation but how can she betray me like that!? I was her best friend and she was supposed to be mine…there was something off about her still and I'm not certain I'm curious enough to find out what's happening anymore. I'm sick of being the one that gets trampled on by people who think they are bigger than I am. Can't they see that I'm just a human being with a heart and soul? I hurt, I cry, and I smile just like everybody else but what the hell is it about me that makes them push me away! Fuck my life. Hard!
This physical transformation might have something to do with that new, horrible attitude she developed but I want to know what made her explode like that! She never used to bottle anything up but she never unloaded like that either so really, what's her fucking deal? I felt so strongly attracted to her and it feels like my heart shattered again, by someone I never once had to suspect of doing something like that to me. Well, we may no longer be on speaking terms anymore but I'm determined to find out what the fuck is up with that girl and what those damn people back at the reservation have to do with it all. I'm sick of being left in the dark like some incompetent child, they should know by now that I'm more stubborn than the lamb they think I am.
When I got home, I threw everything school related onto the floor of my living room and stomped up to my room, ripping the clothes off of my body as I changed into something else that was more comfortable. I needed to think and if I stayed in my house, I would most likely blow up on Charlie who doesn't deserve to be mistreated. I was going out, and I knew just the perfect place I could go to in order to think and vent out properly; the meadow. I felt a pang of hurt when I thought of that place again but the meadow was no longer a paradise for me and a certain lover I once missed. It was just a comfortable place I could go to so I could release all of my inhibitions. I'm sick of allowing my wounds to control me, it just wasn't right anyway.
After hastily writing a note and leaving it on the table for Charlie to read, saying that I was going around for a walk with Jessica and Lauren, I dashed out of my house and started my truck. I didn't bother calling up the girls to lie for me because I'm sure they would actually want to tag along with me and discuss the encounter we had with Angela. Ugh…I couldn't get to the meadow fast enough because throughout the whole way there, I kept thinking about the one girl I missed more than anything else in this world. But I'm pissed at her, and I will not resort to longing for her when she was the one who horribly insulted me in the first place.
Finding the meadow proved to be a very daunting and intimidating task but I was determined and I needed to breathe and re-think about everything that has happened recently. Half an hour and a few droplets of blood, sweat, and tears later, I rediscovered paradise and it was still magnificent as it ever was. There was that familiar clearing where…Rosalie cuddled me after we kissed, and there was that beautiful stream of water that led to a small lake not too far away from here. For the first time in awhile, I felt so at peace and comfortable, like I was meant to find happiness in this place.
It's too bad the feeling didn't last as the hairs on the back of my head stood up. I wasn't alone anymore, of that I was certain because I felt a familiar presence that sent an uncomfortable shiver down my spine. It was a menacing, unfriendly presence and I could predict who it might have been because I still haven't forgotten them like the Cullens easily did. When I slowly, cautiously turned around, I was stunned into silence because I didn't figure out it would be him out of the two nomad vampires I met not too long ago. Laurent was standing right behind me with a ravenous look in his red eyes and I couldn't help but gulp in fear. I couldn't believe my time was actually up, that I didn't have the courage to tell Angela how I felt and to tell my parents how much I loved them. God, I was so selfish.
"Well, hello there, Bella. Long time, no see. You look absolutely delicious this evening, what's the occasion?" He drawled, that predatory look never leaving him. Oh, I was so screwed.
Author's Note: Okay, that's the longest update I've ever done in awhile and I hope it makes up for keeping you guys waiting. I got really sick, and then I got hooked on Glee fan fiction. So I hope you guys like this update cause it was a pain in the ass to deliver with all the distractions. Lol And yes, delicious lemons are on their way. ;) Let's see what happens next though. And, if you haven't heard the song called "We Own the Night" by The 69 Eyes, I suggest you listen to it because I so picture the wolves roaming around at night with this song playing in the background. It's awesome!