Author: Blue Deity PM
After his assistant told him off for something she dreamed, Phoenix does what all the greats do when faced with something weird, he goes to bed, where an even odder dream is waiting for him. Sequel to Is That What You Really Think?Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor - Phoenix W./Nick & Maya F. - Words: 2,894 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 10 - Published: 03-19-10 - Status: Complete - id: 5828361
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Disclaimer: I do not own the Ace Attorney Series or any of its characters. All elements belong to Capcom.
Notes: The follow up for Is That What You Really Think? So read that one first if you haven't. This is Phoenix's dream. Review if you feel like it.
Phoenix remained on the couch for a few seconds after her heard Maya's door slam shut, just blinking and wondering if what just happened was real. During the two years he had known her, Maya was certainly no stranger to doing odd things every now and then, but this was plain weird. What was all that about reading her diary? Phoenix didn't know she even kept one. That was all he could pick out though; everything else just sort of ran together, it sounded like she said something about her breasts, whatever that was about. He didn't know and it was far too late at night to be worried about it. He simply gave a sigh as he turned off the television.
"Strange girl." He muttered to himself. Not the first time he said those words about Maya, and he had a feeling he would say them a few more times before all was said and done. He stood and stretched, whatever was wrong with Maya, it was nothing a few hamburgers won't be able to cure tomorrow morning.
Phoenix found himself in court in his usual spot behind the defense bench.
"Huh, what's going on?" He said to himself. Looking up, he saw the judge take his seat, an uncharacteristically stern look on his face. On the other side of the courtroom he saw Edgeworth standing behind the prosecutor's bench. He was opening his briefcase and had his game face on. "D-Do I have a trial now?!" He stammered with a bead of nervous sweat running down his temple. "I-I don't have anything prepared!" He then noticed the empty space beside him. "Where's my client anyway? And where's Maya for that matter. Maybe she knows what's going on." Luckily, he didn't have to wait long for his assistant as she soon sauntered into the courtroom. She didn't look like her usual perky self however, but Phoenix didn't have time to think about that now, he was in the middle of a crisis. "Maya! He called to her as she got closer. "Thank goodness! What's going on? What case is this? Who are we defen..." He trailed off when he realised she wasn't taking her place next to him, instead she crossed the floor and joined Edgeworth! "MAYA, WH-WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!!" He yelled in shock. Maya didn't answer him; she simply turned up her nose, looked away from him and gave a high-pitched
"Are you okay?" Edgeworth asked with concern, placing a hand on her shoulder.
"I'm fine." She answered.
"Wh-What in the world's going on?" Phoenix stammered. The judge slammed his gavel.
"Order in the court! The civil case of Maya Fey versus Phoenix Wright will now be heard!"
"Wh-what? M-Maya you're suing me?!" He shouted across the courtroom at the girl he thought was his best friend, "Why?!" The judge pounded his gavel again.
"Mr. Wright, you are NOT to address the plaintiff directly, understand!?" Phoenix's shoulders slumped.
"Y-yes your honour." He said meekly. "What is May- I mean Ms. Fey suing me for?"
"For creating an uncomfortable working environment while she was in your employ due to incessant advances of a physical nature." Edgeworth answered.
"SEXUAL HARRASSMENT?!" Phoenix exclaimed in disbelief. "Th-that's the silliest thing I've ever heard!" He put his hand to his forehead and slumped forward before giving out an exasperated sigh. "Your honour, I request a short recess so that I may talk with the plaintiff and get this whole thing worked out without having to waste the court's time any further."
"Denied." The judge replied simply.
"I said your request is denied. Now where is your representation?"
"I-I guess, I'll be representing myself." He stammered.
"Tch, tch Wright," Edgeworth said with a smirk while he shook his finger at him. "You do know what they say about a man whom chooses to defend himself in court?"
"And what's that?" Phoenix asked, knowing he wouldn't like the answer.
"That he has an idiot for a lawyer and a jackass for a client." Edgeworth shrugged.
"Erghh, since when did you act as council anyway Edgeworth, you're a prosecutor?"
"It is my duty to see justice done and offenders of the law punished. Seeing you pay for personal affronts to Ms. Fey is no different than sending a murderer to death row." He answered.
"UGHHH!" Phoenix groaned, "Can we just get this started?"
"Indeed." The judge replied sternly. "Mr. Edgeworth, state your case."
"Yes your honour. What we have here is a classic example of abuse of power and authority over a vulnerable person. Ms. Fey is completely alone in this world. Her sister and mother murdered, a missing father, no siblings, no friends, and no formal education. When Wright hired her to be his assistant, he held complete power over her and knew that she had no way of resisting his inappropriate advances as she had no alternatives for support or shelter." Edgeworth addressed the court. "In short, she felt she had to put up with his behaviour because she had nowhere else to go."
"Objection!" Phoenix shouted. "This is completely inaccurate! There's an entire village two hours away from the city filled with people who would like nothing better to help out Maya, along with a huge Fey family mansion where she could live. Edgeworth is making it sound like I was keeping her prisoner, but Maya stayed with me because she wanted to!"
"Overruled." The judge replied.
"I said overruled, Mr. Wright!" Just then, something clocked Phoenix in the head, a muddy brown liquid ran down his face and covered his eyes, it smelled like...coffee? Once he could see again, he found that Edgeworth was gone, instead standing with Maya was another prosecutor.
"G-Godot?" He was Godot, but his visor was missing and his hair was brown with white streaks going through it.
"Not quite Trite, I'm both Diego Armando AND Godot, call me Diegodot." He announced, gulping down another mug of the brown stuff. "And I'd walk through hell to make you pay for hurting my kitten's sister."
"Oh boy!" Phoenix grunted to himself.
"If it pleases the court, my client would like to take the stand and give her own accounts of what happened between her and this...animal." Diegodot said as he glared at Phoenix.
"Very well." The judge said. "Whenever you're ready." Diegodot gently took Maya's hand and guided her to the witness stand.
"Miss Fey, would you please tell the court how it's been for you since your relationship with Trite began ." He said softly with a warm smile. Maya looked upset.
"It's alright." The judge smiled. "Take your time."
"Thank you your honour. Nick was always really affectionate, ever since I met him, but the last little while things changed. He started to touch me more, hug me, and kiss me for no reason. Then he started doing stuff like slap my butt when I'd walk by his desk or throw stuff on the floor and make me bend over and pick it up for him. Once I caught him trying to see down my robes when I was pouring him a cup of coffee. H-He treated me like a piece of meat most of the time. The whole thing made me so uncomfortable that I wanted to quit." She explained sadly, tears forming in the corners of her eyes as she cradled herself.
"Objection!" Phoenix shouted again. "Maya, you were the one that made our friendship more intimate when you started hugging me! And none of the other things you said happened!" Maya started crying uncontrollably.
"And now he's calling me a liar!!" She bawled.
"M-Maya, no wait, calm down, I-I'm not calling you a liar, you're just mixed up."
"Objection overruled." The judge said glaring at Phoenix. Diegodot put a comforting hand to Maya's shoulder as he gave Phoenix a death glare equal to that of the judge.
"Your honour may I have a short recess so that my client can pull herself together. This entire thing is very stressful on her?" He asked.
"Certainly. This court is in recess for twenty minutes" the judge announced, pounding his gavel. Phoenix shook his head.
"This isn't going very well." He thought. "And why didn't I get my recess when I asked for it? Anyway, at least now I can talk to Maya."
"For the duration of this recess the defendant will be cast in irons to keep him from having any contact with the plaintiff, and for the court's amusement." The judge said with a grin.
Phoenix was startled awake.
"Ughh." He grunted, with his hand to his forehead. He turned over and buried his head in his pillow and was almost immediately back to sleep.
The recess was over, but he was still in chains, this was definitely not a fair trial. Maya was back on the witness stand.
"Is the plaintiff alright to continue?" The judge asked softly, looking down at Maya with what seemed like paternal concern.
"Y-yes your honour, I'm fine." Maya croaked, giving the judge a weak smile.
"I'M not ready your honour!" Phoenix shouted desperately.
"Mr. Wright, these proceedings can go ahead with or without your presence, I suggest you stop these outbursts before I have you removed from my courtroom!"
"Ughh!" Phoenix grunted. The force of something connecting with his head caused him to rear back. "OWWWW!" With one eye closed because of the stabbing pain, he saw that now Franziska von Karma stood opposite him.
"PHOENIX WRIGHT!! You foolishly, foolish fool!" She began attacking him with her whip over and over again, each new crack to his head coming complete with a "FOOL!" from Franziska.
"O-Ob-Objection!" Phoenix called in between hits from the whip. "Th-this isn't right!" He whined. Franziska held her whip still for a second and looked to the judge who was holding his chin thinking.
"Overruled. I'm going to allow it." Franziska's eyes lit up and she turned back towards Phoenix, with a grin that would shame the Cheshire cat.
"Ohh!" he groaned as the whipping started again and eventually drove him to beneath the bench for cover. When the cracking sounds hitting the desk stooped he timidly peeked up over the edge, Franziska was gone, but who he saw in her place was much, much worse. Phoenix dragged himself up, bringing his chains with him. "Well, now I'm screwed." He sighed, Apparently, Maya's newest lawyer was none other than her sister, the deceased Mia Fey.
"Maya sweetie, would you mind telling the judge what happened the day of March 23rd." She said not even acknowledging Phoenix's presence.
"Objection!" Phoenix shouted. "Th-this isn't fair!" Sure he sounded like a whiny child, but what else did he have? "Th-there's no way I can stand up to MIA in court!"
"Overruled!" the judge answered almost immediately.
"Of course!" Phoenix sighed, shaking his head.
"W-well, I was just trying to get a book for Nick off the top of his book shelf and I lost my balance and fell. N-Nick caught me but he didn't just let me go, he held on to me and just rubbed my chest and my backside, I-I didn't think he was gonna stop!"
"Ob-Objection!!" Phoenix screamed. "...Overruled!" He said in unison with the judge, throwing his arms in the air in defeat.
"Your honour!" Mia began sternly. "This isn't just sexual harassment, its borderline sexual assault!" She slammed her hands onto the bench. " It is clear that Mr. Wright acted inappropriately in regards to his relationship with my sister!"
"Your honour, will I ever get a chance to cross-examine the plaintiff?" Phoenix asked, already knowing the answer.
"No." The judge replied.
"One final point your honour." A somewhat squeaky male voice came from the prosecutor's bench. The curvaceous and frightening form of Phoenix's mentor had been replaced by that of a scrawny little guy that he didn't recognise, he had the most ridiculous hairstyle he had seen in his life, and that's saying something, along with a rather impressive forehead. "Miss Fey, if it isn't too painful, would you describe what happened on your most recent birthday?"
"Yeah, we had a big party back at the office for me, everyone was there!" Maya chirped, then if remembering herself, she went back to being sombre. When did you become so underhanded Maya? "A-Anyway, when I opened Nick's gift, i-it was this really sexy lingerie. A-And I opened it up on front of everyone, God I-I was so mortified!" Maya said placing her hands to her forehead and leaning on the bench.
"Objection!" Phoenix knew it wouldn't help, but he was having his say this time. "I did NOT give you 'sexy lingerie' for your birthday! I gave you the Pink Princess pajamas you asked me for! And you sure didn't seem 'mortified' when you opened 'em up and went around showing 'em to everyone at the party!"
"Regardless of that." The kid said with a confident smile. "Sleepwear is a very intimate thing and giving such gifts certainly crosses the line between employer and employee!" he pointed at Phoenix.
"Wh-what's up with this kid, only me and Mia point like that it court. Who is this guy?" Phoenix shook his head, he had more important things to worry about.
"Hold it! Maya isn't just my assistant, she was my best friend, I did nothing inappropriate by giving her what she wanted for her birthday, and there wasn't anything sexual behind it!"
"Yeah, and when did this happen? When did you two become such good friends? Miss Fey?"
"I-I didn't think we were ever friends Nick!" Maya said, Phoenix's jaw dropped, how could she say that? The judge pounded his gavel.
"I have heard enough!" the judge boomed. "This court finds in favour of the plaintiff; clearly the defendant is a despicable, despicable person; and orders him to pay her the amount of $ 100,000,000,000,000,000,000 in restitution!"
"Yay!" Maya exclaimed, jumping up with her arms raised in victory.
"Wh-what?" Phoenix whimpered, "But your honour, there's not that much money in the world! I-I'll never see that much money in my life!"
"True, therefore Phoenix Wright, you are hereby ordered to give every cent you make for the rest of your life over to Maya Fey and turn all of your holdings, including your law firm over to her."
"N-No. I-I'm ruined!!" Maya happily hopped down from the witness bench and went over to him.
"Never mess with me." She said in a hushed voice smiling.
Phoenix darted up.
"J-just a dream." He stammered to himself, he was breathing hard and was sweating profusely. He stood up and wobbled over to his door, when he opened it he almost jumped back, Maya was on the other side, wearing those Pink Princess pajamas he bought her.
"M-Morning Nick." She said lowly, her eyes downcast. Phoenix took a step back when she invited herself into his room.
"M-Morning Maya." Phoenix squeaked.
"Listen, Nick, about last night, umm, I had this really weird dream, you read my diary and were making fun of me about being with that dork Sal Manella. When I woke up I thought it was real and I yelled at you for something I dreampt you did." Maya gave a nervous laugh and shrugged. "Pretty dumb huh?" Phoenix didn't say anything he just kept backing up. "Nick are you alright? Stop giving me the silent treatment! Geez, Nick, I'm trying to be mature here you know!" Maya stepped forward and Phoenix stepped back, tripping up in his bed and falling head over heels over the far side. "Oh God, Nick you okay!" Maya gasped, leaning over the bed to find him sprawled in a heap.
"Y-Yeah, I'm okay." Phoenix replied with embarrassment as he rubbed the back of his head. Maya helped him to his feet. "Let's just say I had a weird dream of my own last night."
"So, are we cool?" Maya asked hopefully.
"Yeah, we're cool. So, come on I'll go make breakfast."
"Yay!" Maya exclaimed. "I'm starving!"
"No surprise there. Oh, Maya.." Phoenix began with a grin. "What was all that about your breasts last night!" Maya's face immediately turned red and she quickly turned her back on him.
"Sh-Shut up Nick and go make my breakfast!"