|First Do No Harm
Author: Pari PM
A tragedy causes more tragedies for Christina and leaves her questioning and doubting everything she thought was good in her life; being a mother, a good nurse, and being in loveRated: Fiction T - English - Family/Angst - Christina H. - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,751 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 08-26-10 - Published: 07-13-10 - id: 6139144
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
"Ok, you're being silly, you love him and you know he would never hurt you."
"You say something?" Tom called out as he sat at the foot of her bed where he removed his shoes and then began unbuttoning the cuffs of his shirt.
"Uh…no just talking to myself," Christina called back through the closed bathroom door, where she stood staring at herself in the mirror. After splashing water on her face and taking a few deep breaths she exited the bathroom, turning off the light behind her. She stood just in the doorway staring at Tom as he fully removed his dress shirt and then pulled the tee shirt he wore underneath over his head. She allowed her eyes to rake over his broad back and when he turned towards her, they fell to his sculpted abs. She could feel the wetness seep from her, and soil her panties.
"Hey," He spoke pulling her from lustful thoughts. "Come here," He held out his hand to her and without any hesitation she moved to the foot of the bed where he stood and grasped his hand. He pulled her up against his body, which loomed over her tiny one. She nestled her head against his breastbone and took a deep sigh as she wrapped her arms around his waist, while he snaked his muscular arms around her shoulders, and he leaned down to bury his nose in her hair. "God you smell so good," He mumbled as he took a deep breath. Christina smiled and then turned her head a bit to kiss his chest.
"I love you," He said softly and the words always made her stomach flip flop and caused her to grin like a Cheshire cat. She pulled back from him moving her arms from his waist to his neck, this prompted him to lift her up so she could access him better, and she instinctively locked her legs around his waist.
"I love you too," She replied and she kissed his neck. She could feel his growing hard at her backside as he moved them to the bed and laid them down. He allowed most of his weight to rest on his arms and dipped in to capture her eager mouth in a kiss. She moaned as she absentmindedly thrust her pelvis upward until her hot center was rubbing against his engorged member. Tom thrust back in kind and with as much fervor. He broke from the kiss and began peppering kissing down her neck and across her collarbone as he used one hand the pulled down the strap of the pink camisole she wore. Christina arched up when Tom's mouth latched onto her exposed right breast. She fisted her right hand in his hair as she used the other hand to pull him closer. She became so internally hot from the sensations she was feeling, her mind nearly lost to a delirium of ecstasy, that her body seemed to be moving on autopilot, acting and reacting to Tom's manipulative mouth. Tom pulled back and she groaned at the loss of him. He yanked her upright and hurriedly pulled the camisole completely from her body, tossing it carelessly over his shoulder as he settled back down to feast upon her breasts. He kissed his way down her body, letting his tongue dip into the grove of her navel as he ventured past it.
"Lift up," He ordered and she hastily obliged him, lifting her bottom from the bed and then wiggling in an effort to help him remove her panties, which he then tossed in the same direction the camisole had gone. He buried his nose in the trimmed, patch of curly hair between her legs, as he spread her legs to gain better access to her pearl. He breathed in deeply and was rewarded with the sweet, musky smell he had come to love. "God you smell so good," He mumbled and then twirled his tongue around Christina's swollen clit. She could only moan in reply her body seemed to croon in harmony with Tom's suckling and licking. Then her body locked up and her voice hitched when Christina felt fingers probing at her center, burrowing through her folds. "Damn you're wet baby, are you wet for me?" Tom asked and suddenly Christina found herself face up on the hospital's parking garage floor. Tears began to sting her eyes as a shaky plea tore from her throat.
"No, stop…stop!" Christina kicked out her legs in a panic as she scurried from the bed. Tom in turn leaped from the bed, nursing his injured arm that Christina had accidentally kicked.
"Christina, what the hell is wrong with you?" Tom said in a roar due the throbbing in his recently repaired arm that was still healing.
"I'm sorry," She spoke, trembling as she moved to a drawer and pulled out some sweats, which she began to put on as a very baffled Tom watched her. "I have to go, I'm sorry." She said as tears fell from her eyes.
"Go, go where? Christina, talk to me, what's going on?" Tom pleaded as concerned filled him. He stepped to her and she turned and bolted from the room. He moved to rush after her but then realized he wasn't dressed for the occasion as he reached for his clothes, but by the time he had finished dress Christina was long gone, not that it matter he knew where she would go, and so he headed out after her.
Bobbie hadn't expected to see the light coming from Christina's office and was quite surprised when she peered through the office door window and found Christina seated at her desk, her face buried in her hands. She knocked gently as she opened the door. Christina stilled and chanced a quick glance at the door, and then let a visible sigh when she saw her close friend and confidant standing before her. Christina's face instantly fell and a sob escaped from her throat.
"Hey, what's wrong sweetie?" Bobbie cooed as she moved closer to her distraught friend and reached out to touched her shoulder.
"I freaked out and he knows something is wrong and I'm gonna lose him, Bobbie. I'm gonna lose him," Christina babbled off, ranting mostly to herself, more so than answering Bobbie's query.
"Who are you…are you talking about Tom? What happened?"
"We…we were making love and it was wonderful, like it always is. Tom was so gentle, so loving but…" Christina paused and began pinching at her bottom lip with her fingers.
"But what? What happened honey?"
"I saw him."
"Him…" Bobbie bunched up her brow in confusing before her mind registered what Christina meant. "You mean the guy who attacked you?" Bobbie asked and Christina nodded her head.
"It was like I was in that garage, lying on my back with all of his weight on me, with his hand…"She paused again as she clamped her eyes shut, but then instantly popped them widely open again. "Oh God what if this happens every time…every time Tom and I make love. I'm gonna lose him Bobbie."
"No, no you're not." Bobbie reassured as she stroked her friend's long, soft tresses. "You won't if you're honest with Tom, you need to tell him what happened."
"No, no I can't," Christina said as she vehemently shook her head. "And you can't either you promised me you won't say anything." She pointed at Bobbie.
"We've already been over this before, you know I would never, ever break your confidence. But I still think you need to tell him."
"I'm afraid," Christina said honestly as fresh tears began to spill from her eyes.
"Afraid of what?"
"Of losing him, I love him so much Bobbie and we've already been through hell getting to this place, being in love and in an 'official' relationship. I'm afraid that if I tell Tom what happened he won't want me anymore, he won't love me anymore."
"That's silly Christina, of course he'll still want you and still love you. What happened to you wasn't your fault. You know how this goes, this isn't going to go away until to speak to someone about this a professional, and you have to tell Tom too."
"Tell me what?" A voice spoke from the door and both Bobbie and Christina jumped, startled.
"Tom, what are you doing here?" Christina asked and Tom chuckled at the question even though his face held no amusement.
"You're seriously asking me that after what happened less than an hour ago?"
"Ok, I'm just gonna go…" Bobbie began to excuse herself.
"No, stay," Tom commanded Bobbie who stood stiffly, stunned by his tone. "I know you know what's going on with Christina, and one of you is gonna tell me what the hell it is." Again his tone stunned them both because it left no room for argument, but before they could continue their discussion Nurse Kelly Epson rushed into the room.
"Oh good you're all here, I'm so sorry for interrupting," Kelly spoke excitedly as she stood just inside the door wringing her hands. "We just got the call that a fire broke out in the downtown warehouse district. We're told that there were about 100 squatters in some of the abandoned warehouses that caught fire, and they already have 46 confirmed dead."
"Oh God," Bobbie gasped out as all concerned eyes in the room locked onto Kelly.
"They're bring half of the remaining burn victims here and diverting the rest to county, Nurse Gayle sent me to find any and all that can help, we need all hands on deck for this one."
"Of course," Christina said as she stood and moved to follow Kelly and Bobbie who were already heading out the door. She silently thanked God that she and Tom would be distracted long enough to postpone their discussion, but before she could follow Kelly and Bobbie out the door, Tom gently grasped her arm and stopped her.
"We're still having our conversation later Christina," He spoke in a lower voice and she shot her eyes up to meet his briefly and gave a curt nod. He then released her and they both exited her office and headed down to the ER.
When they finally reached the ER the burn victims had already arrived and the ER seemed to be in chaos. Each of them branched off and found a patient that seemed to be waiting to be looked at.
"Excuse me ma'am," A voice pulled Christina from her focus on the patient she had been tending, who luckily only had 1st degree burns that would only need ointment, and probably wouldn't scar. "We've got 6 more patients, where do you want them?" The paramedic asked as he pulled in a patient on a gurney. Christina looked around the ER which looked like a war-zone, as she contemplated.
"Uhm…there, that corridor right there just inside the entrance and we'll take care of them, thank you." With a nod the paramedic moved to do as he had been instructed to do. Christina moved to where she saw Tom working on another more serious looking patient. "Hey we have 6 more coming in now they're being placed in the entrance corridor, could you…"
"Yeah I'm done here, we had to put her in a drug induced coma. There's nothing more we can do for here down here. But there's a guy I left in exam room C, we need to get him on a morphine drip. His entire right side is completely black and melted, I doubt he'll make it but at least we can make him comfortable." Christina nodded in agreement.
"Ok I'm on it and then I'll come help you with the others in the corridor." With a nod Tom head one way and Christina head the other way to Exam room C. She could hear the man's muffled screams as she neared the closed door. She entered the room intending to help ease the poor man's suffering but instead she entered her own nightmare as her eyes locked onto the half charred face of her attacker.
She hadn't recalled moving further into the room, she didn't remember taking the seat beside the bed, and she hadn't heard the voice calling to her. It had only been the slap across her face that slammed her back to reality. She blinked her eyes and focused on to Bobbie who stood before her.
"Christina what the hell is wrong with you, can't you hear this guy screaming in agony?" Bobbie asked as she yanked the morphine bag from Christina's grip and moved to start a drip.
"He's in agony?" Christina asked with a frown upon her face and tears falling from her eyes. "Are you in agony?" She asked as she leaned in closer to his face, so he could see her better. His one functioning eye widened with recognition. "Does it hurt?" She asked as she let her eyes roam over his body and then reached out and tugged the blanket up a bit as if she intended to make him more comfortable. "I hope it hurts."
"Christina!" Bobbie hissed out in disbelief as she turned to look at her friend. Christina didn't acknowledge Bobbie as her eyes remained fixed on the man whose screams had quieted down to mournful groans.
"I hope you suffer, like you've made me suffer." Christina continued to taunt the man. "And I hope you're scared, like you've made me scared." Bobbie's eyes nearly bulged out of her head as realization dawned on her.
"Oh my God," Bobbie exclaimed as her eyes moved from Christina to stare at the man, and she stalled in her movements to adjust his drip line more, to increase the drip.
"You're going to die," Christina said as she stood from the seat she had been sitting in and leaned over the man, leering down at him. Bobbie hurried around the bed and grasped Christina by the shoulders. "It's true, you're going to die the doctor told me your burns are too extensive."
"Christina, come on let's go." Bobbie spoke softly as she pulled her friend from the bedside and to the door.
"You're gonna die and I hope you burn in hell you son-of-a-bitch!" Christina spat out just before Bobbie tugged her from the exam room, shutting the door behind them. Once they were outside the room Christina crumbled into Bobbie's waiting arms and sobbed out her anger, her fear, and her relief as Bobbie gently rocked her. The weight of everything seems to crash down on her and around her and she pulled Bobbie to the floor with her, and that was where Tom found them.
"What happened?" Tom asked as he squatted before them and brushed his hands and eyes over Christina in concern.
"You should take her home." Bobbie said as she pulled back a bit from the embrace. "Christina sweetie, Tom's here and he's gonna take you home now ok." Christina shook her head but never stopped her sobbing.
"No, the patients...*hic*... we have to stay and help…"
"No, we can handle it. You're in no condition to do anything except rest, and if you go and Dr. Wakefield stays, he'll spend the entire time wondering and worrying about you, instead of being focused on the patients." Bobbie said as she threw Tom a smile and he didn't bother to argue her point because he knew she was right. "Come on," Bobbie fully extracted herself from Christina's embrace. "Let Tom take you home." Tom grasped both of the hands in one of his and tugged them up from the floor. Once she got her bearings Christina caught a glimpse of the man inside the room and the truth of what she had done, what she would have done if Bobbie hadn't found her struck her.
"Oh God," She gasped out as she covered her mouth with her hand, holding in the scream that wanted out. Bobbie understood the panic and grasped her shoulders to turn her and move her focus from the exam room window.
"It's ok, it's ok you didn't do anything wrong. I took care of him." Bobbie reassured as Tom watched them curiously. "Just go with Tom now." Bobbie then pushed her into Tom's open arms. Christina closed her eyes and rested her head against his broad chest as he enveloped her, wrapping his arms around her while he kissed the top of her head.
"Come on baby, let's go home." Tom spoke in a soft murmur against Christina's temple. She nodded as she took a step only to stubble and nearly fall to the floor from exhaustion. Tom swiftly and effortlessly scooped her up into his strong arms and walked them out, they ignored everyone they passed who tried to gain their attention.
Once they had arrived home Tom had settled Christina into a long hot bath, where she had soaked for nearly an hour before he came back in to retrieve her. He patiently dried her body and her hair and put her in a nightgown. He followed the nightly routine he had witness her danced through every night since he had taken up residency in her bed. He put lotion on her entire body and brushed her hair until it felt like silk. Finally he put her to bed and then settled in beside her, not bothering to put on his pajamas, just wanting to be near her, holding her. They had lain in comfortable silence for almost three hours before Christina spoke in a whisper, her voice was soft but loud enough to pull Tom from his semi dream state.
"He tried to rape me," She spoke out and the words shocked Tom still, though he instantly became filled with the overwhelming urged to strike out and kill whoever 'he' was but before he could act or speak Christina continued. "It wasn't a mugging." She said and he clamped his eyes shut to the truth, he finally understood her behavior for the past few weeks, and he just lay quietly allowing her to finally get it all off of her chest. "He held me down and stuck his hands inside my pants and put his fingers inside…" She nearly choked on the words and the sobs that sudden captured her. "I'm sorry." Tom's eyes shot open and he frowned down at her in confusion, not understanding why she was apologizing.
"You don't have anything to be sorry for. Baby it wasn't your fault. I'm the one who's sorry. I'm sorry that happened to you and I wasn't there to protect you."
"No, no," She moved back a bit and reached up and grasped his face in both of her hands as she stared at him intensely. "It wasn't your fault and I know that you would have protected me if you could have. Please don't blame yourself and please…please don't leave me."
"What…God Christina you think I'm gonna leave you…I love you and I still want to be with you." She cried out a bit in joy at hearing that her worst fear had been unfounded. "I'm here to stay and you're not getting rid of me, you're stuck kiddo."
"I think I'm ok with that," Christina said as she sniffled around a broad smile.
"This isn't gonna break us, it's only gonna make us stronger. I'm here for you if you want…need to see someone, I'm here or if you don't want to see someone I'm still here."
"I'm so lucky to have you in my life." She said her eyes shining with love as she stroked his face. "And I cannot believe I almost threw it all away tonight when I saw him in that exam room…"
"Wha…wait, the guy who attacked you…He was at the hospital…tonight?"
"Yeah it was Mr. Extra Crispy in exam room C." She answered. "I wanted to," She bit back the words. "I said horrible things to him and I don't know how long he sat screaming in pain before Bobbie found us and gave him the morphine drip."
"Well you probably wouldn't have done worse than what I'm gonna do to him." Tom spoke as he sat up to extract himself from Christina's arms, but her grip tightened around him.
"What no Tom, no. I'm not gonna let you go do something crazy. Something that's gonna make you lose your career and your freedom. I won't lose you like that. Please don't do anything crazy." She begged and she knew she had gotten through to him by the way his shoulders slumped in defeat.
"Fine, but at least let me call the police that guy needs to be off the streets, there's no telling how many other women he's attacked."
"You saw him, he's never gonna hurt anyone ever again." Tom nodded his head he knew the man would not survive the injuries he had sustained, but he still couldn't squash the need to choke the remaining life out of the man who had harmed the woman he loved. "I don't want to think about him anymore. Just hold me, please just hold me tight." Christina snuggled her face against Tom's chest and Tom indulged her as he encased her in a bear hug. It didn't take long for both of them to drift off into a peaceful sleep.
"Good morning Dr. Wakefield," The head RN of the burn unit greeted as Tom stopped at the nurse's station and grasped a chart. "We hardly see you around these parts."
"I'm just checking up on a patient I saw down in the ER, he was pretty bad off I didn't expect him to make it through the night."
"Oh you must mean Mr. Fitzgerald, yeah he was pretty bad off and he made it through the night ok but he died earlier this morning."
"Oh?" Tom pretended to read of the man's chart, when truthfully he could care less about his diagnosis or prognosis, and was just happy that the bastard had died, and yet disappointed he wouldn't get the chance to make him suffer more.
"Yes there was really nothing we could do for him except to make him more confortable before he passed on. Poor guy he was in a lot of pain but Nurse Jackson brought him up from the ER and stayed with him all night increasing the morphine drip, you know taking a bit of the edge off whenever he cried out. Though I don't think it was helping him he cried all night until he finally passed on."
"Well I'm sure he's in a better place now," Tom said but 'burning in hell' was the thought that filled his head as he sat the chart down and headed out.
"Amen," He heard the nurse call out after him. Once he made it around the corner from the nurse's station he pulled the syringe from his lab coat pocket, squirted out the concoction he had mixed into a nearby trash bin and then disposed of the needle in the hazard needle box on the wall nearby.
She read the plaque on the door for what had to be the 50th time. It read 'Richmond Virginia Rape Crisis Center'. She had decided that Bobbie was right she did need to seek the help of a professional about what had happened to her in order for her to stop being a victim and start being a survivor. With both Bobbie's and Tom's support Christina knew somehow she would get through it.