|You Changed, Not Me
Author: Follow-The-Firefly PM
I'm not the one who became a different person. That was all you. Rated T for Teen. AkuSai/ LeaXIsa ONESHOTRated: Fiction T - English - Angst/Drama - Axel & Saïx - Words: 2,258 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Published: 08-07-10 - Status: Complete - id: 6215487
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts. How awesome would it be if I did?
Zephyr here! Yeah, I had another name change. So I've been working on this story for almost a year. I think I started it back around Thanksgiving...This is kinda based off of a note-thing in 358/2 Days. You won't be able to get it unless you've beaten the game, though. The title and the last two lines are straight from this note. So let the deadly tale begin!
"We have to set things right. There's simply too much on the line, Lea."
I don't even bother responding. He knows that our former friendship has fallen apart, if you can even call it a friendship. He knows that he's touched a nerve by mentioning my feelings for Roxas.
He knows he hasn't called me by my true name since we became Nobodies.
My eyes remain on him for a few seconds before I turn and walk away, over to Nothing's Call where I can think properly. It's the place I go when I need to be alone. Sure, it's out in the open, but when everyone else sees me here, they know not to mess with me. After I attacked Vexen when he tried to bother me, they all leave me alone.
Everything's gotten really crazy lately. I mean, things used to be normal. I would go on missions, come back to the Castle, and train with the Dusks. I know it sounds boring, but what else was there to do? It's not like I was going to challenge Larxene to a fight. God, that's one mistake I'll never make.
Then Roxas showed up and everything changed.
I'll admit I didn't really like the kid when he first showed up. He didn't seem like much to me. He didn't speak for the first week and he was horrible at fighting. And I was supposed to believe that he was the Keyblade master's Nobody? Give me a break.
I honestly have no idea why I was meant to show Roxas how to carry out missions. Seriously! I'm no good with kids! The incident with Demyx in Fragment Crossing should be enough to prove that!
But no, I was ordered to go to Twilight Town with Roxas and show him "basic survival skills", as Xemnas put it.
But in all seriousness, the kid did better than I thought he would. I mean, he still had a long ways to go, but at least he was talking to me, even if a little.
For a while there, Roxas would go with the other members and learn other things: Vexen taught him about reconnaissance, he learned about using magic from Larxene (a really bad teacher, might I add) and Marluxia taught him how to use his Keyblade. I kept hearing about how he was improving, despite how he didn't understand the Organization's real goal.
Well, he's not going to understand it if no one explains it to him.
Then we went on our first mission together: Heartless elimination. I was dreading it because I was stuck with the kid again, but I wanted to see how much he'd improved. Was he holding himself up to the Organization's standards?
Roxas did really well, despite the fact that he was a little over a week old. Sure, he had his rough spots, but who the hell doesn't? Even Xemnas isn't perfect.
Around that time, Xion showed up. Forget Roxas, this was a kid who was withdrawn. She didn't talk for the longest time. It was just confusing for me. When I left for Castle Oblivion, she wasn't speaking to anyone and when I came back, she was acting like nothing was out of the ordinary.
I always thought Roxas had something to do with why she started speaking.
My question is why Roxas? Seriously though, what is it about him that made her start to speak?
I didn't understand until I found out the truth about Xion. Once I knew that, all the pieces came into place.
Roxas suggested that the three of us hang out on the clock tower in Twilight Town after our missions for ice cream. I wasn't so sure about it at first, but I went for Roxas. After a few meetings, I realized that it wasn't so bad. It was interesting to watch Roxas and Xion interact with each other.
For one reason or another, I started to feel different. When I was around Roxas, I was fine. But when Xion joined us, things changed. And that's not even half of it. While I felt fine around Roxas, it wasn't the same way I used to feel around him. Before Castle Oblivion, I felt like he was just another Nobody, nothing special. But when I got back, I noticed that something had changed.
It took me a while to realize that it was me who had changed. It was kinda scary, too. I mean, Nobodies can't feel, right? We have no hearts, so that means that we have no emotion.
But I know that what I feel about Roxas is an emotion. It is a feeling, and I had no idea what to do.
I tried to tell Saïx about it, but he was too concerned with Kingdom Hearts to care. That's when I realized it.
Saïx isn't who he once was.
Granted, he's a Nobody so of course he isn't an exact copy of his other, but I digress.
I can't believe I didn't notice it before. I mean, back before Saïx and I became Nobodies, we used to be really close. And I mean that in the most literal way possible.
Let me put it this way: I used to like Saïx like I now like Roxas.
Looking back on it now, I can't see how in the world it happened. It just looks so weird and crazy.
Seriously, I don't see how we became friends. I know Lea was kinda on the odd side and Isa didn't really fit in with everyone else. So is that how we became friends? Because we were really different from everyone else?
I remember Lea wanted to play soccer during recess at school, but there weren't enough kids to form two teams. He wanted Isa to play, but Isa didn't want to. While they were walking home from school, Lea asked Isa why he didn't play with the rest of the kids. Isa simply said that he didn't think any of the other kids would like it if he joined them.
So after that, Isa and Lea started to hang out. Isa was hesitant at first, but he gradually started to become more social. He didn't mind going to play soccer at the park or street hockey in the court where Lea lived.
Once they hit high school, Isa and Lea were practically inseparable. They did just about everything together. It was kinda creepy, now that I think about it.
Somehow, Lea had fallen for Isa, but he didn't know what to do about it. He knew that he was acting weird around him, but did Isa really notice it?
Deciding that Isa should know the truth, Lea told him. And somehow, Isa felt the same way about Lea.
So the two got together, something that really shocked everyone. I mean, really. The two didn't look like they would be friends, let alone boyfriends.
After some time, Isa came up with an idea: why not take over Organization XIII? Lea didn't think much of the idea at the time, since he knew how dangerous Organization XIII was.
Things got much worse when Saïx and I joined, let me tell you.
I'm going off topic again, aren't I? My bad.
So Isa somehow convinced Lea to go ahead with the plan. They started training ridiculously long hours of the day. Lea wasn't really concerned with taking over the Organization. I mean, it was something he was interested in, sure. He wouldn't mind if it actually happened, but he wasn't going to try and work himself to death trying to do so, either.
Isa was a different story. Isa was obsessed and I mean that quite literally. Lea would get so tired of Isa talking about how they were going to overthrow Organization XIII.
Now that I think about it, Isa was kinda like Marluxia. At least Marluxia toned it down a bit and knew when to shut up about the matter.
Isa didn't. Isa told everyone who would listen about how he and Lea were going to take over the Organization. Fortunately, Lea didn't tell anyone about their scheme. It's a good thing, too. If Lea had told anyone else, they'd probably have been arrested.
Scratch that, I'm almost positive they would have been arrested.
That aside, Lea didn't tell Isa that he was getting tired of trying to take over Organization XIII and fed up with training for hours on end. He knew that Isa wouldn't handle it very well, since he never took bad news well.
One night, Isa told Lea that he had some good news for him and to meet at his house. Confused, Lea did as Isa requested and headed over to his house. When they were alone in Isa's room, Isa told Lea something that would change them forever.
They were ready, ready to take over Organization XIII.
In order to do that, though, they had to become Heartless so that their Nobodies could become part of the Organization.
That night, Isa and Lea became Heartless, ceasing to exist as they once had, and Saïx and I were created.
Soon after, Xemnas found us and brought us back to the World That Never Was, but not without giving us new names. Isa became Saïx, Lea became Axel, became who I am.
After we became Nobodies, Saïx and I attended our first meeting as official members of Organization XIII. While I tried to master my fire powers, Saïx was paying attention to what Xemnas was saying.
In fact, he was the only one that was. Vexen was working on some experiment idea, Zexion was reading, Xigbar was flicking stray bullets in the air, and Lexaeus and Xaldin were asleep.
I knew this was going to happen. As soon as Isa and Lea became Nobodies, I knew Saïx would try to become Xemnas' favourite.
And what do you know? It actually happened.
These things really aren't that predictable, are they?
A few weeks after we became members, Saïx and I crossed paths in the Hall of Empty Melodies. Saïx asked where I had been when he was giving out mission assignments that morning. I replied by explaining to him that I was on a mission in the Deep Jungle and had just returned a few minutes before. Despite this, Saïx said that I should have been at the Castle for the assignments. This, however, was impossible since I was gone.
While this may seem like nothing, this was the first sign. I knew Saïx had changed. Isa would have understood if Lea had said that he wasn't available because he was already on a mission.
It appeared that Saïx was going to be different. And as the weeks went by and Saïx became more demanding, it became obvious that I was right.
Saïx was becoming like Xemnas.
I don't know how I didn't see it before. It was so obvious, right in front of me, but I just didn't see it.
I should have seen it before I told Saïx how I feel about Roxas. However, I was so focused on number XIII that I didn't pay much attention to anything else.
I had told Saïx that I was taken with Roxas and he simply stared at me. I looked into his eyes, trying to figure out what he was thinking, but I couldn't. I couldn't figure out what was going on inside his head.
Saïx just told me that Nobodies don't experience emotions, that being with Roxas too much was making me feel like I had a heart. He told me to spend less time with Roxas and that I'd return to normal.
That's when it finally hit me.
Saïx had lost his emotions. And that was not a good thing. At least for me, anyway.
I think some part of me was telling me that I wanted to pick up where Lea had left off. Some part of me was saying that I needed to get back with Saïx.
But the other half of me was saying no. The other side was saying that it would never work, that we'd changed too much. Well, that's not entirely correct.
I'm not the one who changed. You did.
Yeah, this is nowhere near what I hoped this would be. But here it is. I hope it's not TOO bad. I plan on writing a few more AkuSai oneshots in the future, but I think they'll be kinda like this one. Anyway, reviews equal love! Thanks for reading! Zephyr out.