Author: ThunderClouds7 PM
Elite Zombie Hunting Force. My friends and I form a zombie hunting force as the world basically goes poof over night and is overrun by the undead. We have a whole lot of fun during our many insane adventures and get into a ton of stupid situations as we try to take back what was lost. And what's more fun than kicking zombie ass with magic? Elves, shapeshifters, werewolves, and fun.Rated: Fiction T - English - Horror/Adventure - Chapters: 32 - Words: 65,769 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 04-12-13 - Published: 08-09-10 - id: 6221672
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Enia: This is the last chapter. I'm sorry. I've enjoyed the ride.
Samik was mad at me when I found him and the others. When he saw me approaching, his face folded into a glare, and his arms folded, fingers tapping. "Hallo!" I yelled brightly, raising a hand in greeting.
"What the hell was that, Enia?" Samik demanded. "Where did you go?"
"I heard a tiny fairy calling my name on the wind, and I knew I had to follow it to fulfill my destiny," I answered. William, David, and Minka facepalmed. Zeus raised an eyebrow, Teemo and Onyx smirked, and Arin sighed. Samik fought to keep a straight face. "It let me into Gargoland where I journeyed across the world, met fantastical creatures, and killed a lot of stuff. I defeated an ancient evil that was trying to plunge the world into darkness so happiness and cupcakes could return!" I skipped across the slushy, icy ground and linked my arm through Samiks. "So, how long was I gone?"
"'Bout an hour," he answered.
"Huh, that's weird. I spent about a year there."
I finally got Samik to laugh. Together, we turned and started heading back towards the library. Teemo was wearing my flamethrower and playing with it happily, sending fire into the sky and whooping. Onyx had my chainsaw; that I was a little worried about. "So, anything interesting happen while I was gone?"
Samik shrugged. "David almost killed Trouble."
"Well, if somebody didn't, I was gonna," I laughed.
Something crashed through the window of the library, making us all jump. A frying pan skittered across the ground before us. Samik looked shocked and offended. "Bitch!" he yelled. A book nearly nailed Minka in the head; she cursed.
"What the hell is going on in there?" I demanded, storming towards the building.
Inside was chaos. All the humans were pushing and shoving, shouting angrily at each other. Tables had been knocked over, and books were strewn across the ground (some still flying through the air). Many weapons were drawn, and guess who was right in the middle of it.
"We need to stop this," I said. "I don't care what the hell started it, but it ends now."
William and David stepped forward, cracking their knuckles. I nodded to them. David leapt towards the nearest gun-toting maniac and crashed into the woman, knocking her to the floor. The gun flew out of her hand. David kicked it into the shadows and jumped onto the back of another human, snarling. William ran at Trouble, who was shouting unintelligibly at the skirmishing humans. William tapped him on the shoulder and slugged the man across the face when he turned around. Trouble went down like a sack of rotten tomatoes.
The rest of us moved into the room, fanning out. "Arin," I said. "Get up on a table and start shouting. Try to get people to calm down."
She nodded and jumped up onto the only table still on four legs. "Hey!"
No one heard her or cared enough to listen.
I spotted someone raising their pistol to shoot a woman in the chest. I rushed forward and kicked the weapon out of his hands. He yelped with pain. Another man stumbled past with William hanging off his back, fingernails in the man's ears. Onyx had someone in a headlock and was busy yelling, "Noogie!" Teemo had gotten into a childish slapping catfight with a seven-year-old girl. Minka was glaring furiously at a group of humans, making them cower in a corner, and Zeus was running about the room, kicking people's legs out from under them.
I punched a man in the gut when he tried to tackle me and threw him into a bookshelf. We needed to get this under control, fast. I ninja-rolled ('cause I was boss like that) across the floor to scoop up an abandoned pistol. I pointed it at the ceiling and gazed around at the chaos. Then I pulled the trigger.
Worst. Idea. Ever.
Startled by the blast, all the trigger-happy humans grabbed their guns and started shooting. All the sane ones hit the floor. I rolled my eyes; facepalm.
David leapt up onto the table with Arin, who was still waving her arms and yelling. There was blood on his shirt that I really didn't want to know where it came from. "Rawr!" he bellowed. His face held hints of the wolf inside him. "I'm a zombie, and I'm gonna eat you all if you don't shut the fuck up right now!"
The room fell silent, and the people froze. In the middle, Teemow as shaking with suppressed laughter. I found myself starting to smirk, and I had to turn around to keep it from showing. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw most of E.Z.H.F. doing the same.
"Very good," David growled. I heard him jump down from the table.
"Oooookay," Arin said slowly. "Somone wanna tell me what the fuck's going on here?"
I faced forward again to watch. An older man pointed towards Trouble's prone form. "He started it.
"Could you guys stop swearing?" a woman asked. She had a small child clutched to her chest. "There are small children in the room."
Seriously? That was what she was worried about?
"Oh, sorry," Arin said. Onyx smirked. "But seriously, what happened?"
The older man shrugged. "Not entirely sure. That man was yammering about something or the other, I don't even know what. Something started arguing with him, and the whole thing just sorta exploded."
"Of course it did," I sighed.
"Can I throw him out the window?" William asked eagerly.
I was tempted to agree; I really was. But I didn't think the humans would like it. "No," I sighed. "Don't."
William huffed and folded his arms. I shrugged apologetically. "So the next question is," the older man continued, "who fired the first shot?"
Everyone looked around the room, searching for the culprit. I tried to look innocent and unobtrusively dropped the pistol behind my back. Samik rolled his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose when he saw. "That doesn't matter now," he said. "What's done is done, and there's nothing we can do to change it."
Wow, thanks for making me feel bad.
"And we need to find out who's dead or wounded," he finished.
The older man nodded. "Alright. Good idea."
"Somebody smack Trouble and wake him up; I want to talk to him," I added.
I pointed at the unconscious human on the floor. "That's what I call him."
The older man smirked. "That's a good name for him." He pointed at a nearby woman. She took great pleasure in smacking him across the face. I stalked over and, as soon as he spluttered awake, grabbed his arm and yanked him to his feet.
"Hey!" he protested, tugging at my hand.
"Come with me," I snarled. "You and I are going to have a chitty-chat."
"Give him a smack for me, Enia!" Teemo called.
I raised a hand abruptly. "Will do."
I dragged Trouble across the library unceremoniously. "Let go of me!" he yelled.
I obliged and threw him into an empty office. I stepped in after him, shutting the door behind him. When I turned around, he was pressed against the far wall, a lamp held out before him. Its cord was still plugged into the wall. "Put that down," I ordered.
"Make me, bitch," he growled.
I sighed, and when I blinked, a jolt of electricity jumped through the socket and gave Trouble a shock. He yelped and quickly dropped the lamp, giving me a frightened look. "What the hell was all that?" I demanded.
"Was all what?" he asked, bewildering.
I gestured behind me at the library where the dead were being rounded up and the wounded tended to. "Back there. Getting people to start trying to kill each other."
"It wasn't my fault," he answered quickly.
I laughed darkly. "Yeah? Then who was it? The Easter Bunny's? Or did the zombies get inside your head and start whispering?"
Trouble finally regained enough courage to glare at me. "No. It was your fault."
Okay, didn't see that one coming. "What!" I yelled, fists clenching. "Don't you dare try to blame this on me, you bastard!"
"Well, maybe if you guys weren't such freaks this wouldn't be a problem!"
"What the hell's that supposed to mean!?" I stalked forward, moving silently across the floor, head aching to draw my sword and cut Trouble's head off with it.
He swiftly sidestepped me before I could get too close and ran away, putting a desk between us. "I've heard your friends talking, you know, when they think they aren't listening. They talk down about us, using the word human like it's a bad thing. Like they're above us, or better than us. As if they aren't human." His eyes were wild, bordering on maniac. He was clutching a stapler in his hand; I really hoped he would end up stabling his thumb with it. "I've seen things too. Weird things. Your friend Teemo lies to play with fire, but he never has a lighter or matches. Your two scary friends always smell like dog. And-"
"Shut the fuck up," I snarled slowly, moving towards him again until I was close enough that he took a step back. I planted my hands on the desk and leaned forward, fixing him with my best glare. "Do you hear me? Shut the fuck up before I kill you."
Troubles eyes glinted victoriously. "So I'm right then."
"I never said that. Do not put words in my mouth." Trouble opened his mouth to deliver some pithy reply, but I beat him to it. "Besides, you'd probably be dead if it weren't for us."
That shut him up. His mouth snapped close like a sprung trap. I grinned maliciously. "That's right. And don't forget we can toss you out of here just as quickly as we brought you in."
"Look at you, getting all high and mighty," Trouble growled, lip curling. "Who do you think you are, God?"
"No," I snapped. I wanted to throttle the man! "I'm the super angry bitch who can and will kick your ass if you keep annoying her!"
"Oh, I'm so scared," he sneered.
I wasn't thinking any more. I was ready to make the stupidest move ever and show this bastard just who he was dealing with. I was tired of the pretentious human, tired of hiding my powers, tired of trying to be a good person. I was ready to ruin everything we were trying to build in the library for one quick flash of pleasure, damn the consequences.
But before I could, someone in the main room screamed.
Instantly, I leapt over the deck, shoved Trouble out of the way, and burst through the door, sword in hand. The room was locked in pandemonium, humans panicking, drawing weapons, or trying to hide. E.Z.H.F. was trying to calm them down but with no success. "Enia!" Samik called, beckoning me over. "We've got a bit of problem."
I ran to the window where he stood, shoving a woman out of the way. "What?"
"Look," he said and stepped back so I could see.
I peered through the glass and immediately began to curse violently, mixing Elvish with English. At our doorstep was an army. The zombies blanketed the downtown area, stretching on and on, thousands. They pressed up against our wall (it had been weakened by explosives by someone) and pressed into each other from behind, crushing a few unlucky ones. The stench that rose from them like steam from soup was almost unbearable, even through the thick concrete walls. At their back, floating high above the corpses and partially hidden by the clouds, I thought I saw a deep black shadow; proof that there was something else at work in this apocalypse. But I didn't have time to worry about it.
"Get the Molotov Cocktails!" I shouted to anyone who would listen, glad for once that we'd had that crazy-ass party. "Then get up on the stable parts of the walls! Let's rain fire down on these bitches like there's no tomorrow!"
Some of the humans heard and jumped to obey. The rest continued panicking.
"E.Z.H.F.!" I continued, turning and striding through the bedlam. "To me! We're going in!"
David caught my arm and spun me to a halt. "There are too many of them to take on without using our powers."
"I know," I agreed. "Just try to be subtle."
He nodded and ran on ahead. The nine of us formed up and walked down the stairs together, calm despite the rush around us. "Is there a plan?" Teemo asked excitedly. He was practically bouncing three feet in the air.
"Kill 'em all."
"Best plan evah!"
Onyx kicked the door open for us, and immediately we saw where we would have to attack first. The lead zombies had broken through the wall, pouring in in one's and two's, and attacking. At least three humans were already dead or being munched on. "Go!" I shouted, and we leapt into the battle.
I vaulted up and over the zombies' heads, landing on top of one of our parked cars. I lost track of the others as they dispersed into the weaving crowd, and drew my sword. Flaming bottles rained down around us, exploding in bright bursts on impact. Zombies clawed at the smooth roof of my perch, so I summoned up a hammer with my magic to play Whack-A-Zombie. Soon the white plastic turned brown and red.
The bodies began to pile up, and the zombies slowly crawled up them. They would swamp me soon. I leapt off the car and swept my sword in a glittering arc. Arms and hands flopped to the ground. But I needed more space. The zombies were crowding in ever closer.
I Flicked my finger at the nearest of them. The sudden blast sent me flying over the heads of the zombies, and I crashed-landed on the ground fifty feet away. I was pretty sure my eyebrows were gone. Groaning, I quickly flipped over and onto my feet. My sword darted out to impale a zombie's brain. I was still in trouble. I needed to get out of there, and I needed to do it fast.
The wall was ten feet to my right. Up above, the humans were still hurling Molotov Cocktails down on the herd. I waited until one landed, then added to it with my powers, blowing the zombies backwards. I ran through the hole it left and jumped onto the wall, clinging to a dangling rope. It was only just high enough for me to be out of reach if I pulled my legs up. Using my newfound height, I began to attack, swinging back and forth on the rope and hacking viciously. Soon I was sort of dizzy from the back and forth motion.
Again, the corpses piled up. My sword could no longer reach the living zombies easily. So I let go of the rope and pushed off the wall, landing right next to the tag team of William and David. A zombie was clinging to William's back, nomming at his sturdy leather jacket, and decimated corpses littered the ground.
William roared angrily, and his form shivered. A giant black wolf replaced the man, and the zombie lost its grip.
That was when the carnage really began. David howled and joined his friend, turning into a white wolf. They leapt into the mob of zombies, and body parts began to fly. I dodged a bloody arm and was besieged by my own little army.
I was on a roll. I leapt from spot to spot, leaving behind donut shaped piles of corpses in my wake. The space between the staggering zombies grew larger and larger. The ground was a carpet of blood and body parts. Smoking craters dotted the battlefield. We were actually going to win this thing. Who'da thunk.
But then a low wailing sound pierced the air. More of the dark shadows from before appeared, creating a star around the crowd of zombies. I glanced at them suspiciously; they emitted a powerful magical aura.
Everything went dark for an instant. I cursed silently, ready for an attack, but none came. Light returned to the world and everything was the same…except that all the zombies were gone.
What. The. Fuck.
E.Z.H.F. was scattered across the battlefield, all still standing. William and David prowled on all fours, still in wolf form. A human screamed. I spun around; a woman was pointing at the two animals, bawling her head off. Trouble had found his way onto the wall. "I knew you were all freaks!" he yelled.
I gave him the finger with both hands.
"Shit," William muttered, back in human form. The rest of my friends came over, and we stood together.
David winced. "Sorry."
Trouble had gotten down from the wall and was stalking towards us, yelling something. I crossed my arms and tapped my foot. "I knew it!" He finally came close enough for us to understand his words. "I knew you were all freaks!"
"Why is that a bad thing?" Arin wondered to herself. Teemo shrugged.
"Those boys are monsters!" Trouble ranted. "Demons! Sorcerers! They consort with the power of evil!"
"And saved your asses," I interrupted. "Without them, the library probably would've been overrun."
"Because they called upon the demons to whisk the zombies away! We all saw the sudden darkness, and when the lights came back, they were all gone!" There was just no winning with that guy.
"Technically, you can't see darkness," Zeus mused, earning a glare from Trouble. She stuck her thumbs in her ears, wiggled her fingers, and poked her tongue out at him.
I glanced back at the library and saw that the majority of the humans were gathered on the wall. They looked angry and were muttering amongst themselves. Some even had guns trained on us, on William and David. "They need to leave," Trouble finished. I'd missed the finale of his speech.
"No, they don't," I snarled.
William smirked. "Aw, Enia, you really do love me!"
That earned him a smack upside his pretentious wolfy face from me, a kick in the shin from Teemo, a stomp on the foot from Arin, and a smirk from Samik because of his swift punishment.
"It's alright," David said, silencing all of us. "William and I have been talking about this, actually." He looked at me. "We were going to tell you when we decided. I've got some people I want to check on in Canada, and William thinks there'll be more action and less annoying people up there. We're okay leaving."
"Yeah," William agreed.
"Are you sure?" I asked. Both nodded. I shrugged and stuck out my hand. "Okay. Go and fight in Canada. Maybe we'll see each other again."
William shook with me first and waggled his eyebrows. "I certainly hope so." I crushed his fingers before letting go.
"Count on it," David said. He leaned in to murmur in my ear, "Keep an eye out. There's something else at work here."
"Don't I know it," I agreed.
William and David stepped back, glaring at Trouble one last time (and Samik in William's case). They morphed into wolves just to scare the humans again. Trouble quickly stepped back, tripping over a dismembered arm. He landed hard on his butt. I raised my hand in farewell to the werewolves. They howled in reply, turned tail, and ran off into the sunset…well, it was only three o'clock…Shut up.
I stepped over Trouble without giving him a second look. E.Z.H.F. filed after me. I glared up at the humans on the wall. "If anyone wants to leave, then get the hell out of here! If not, start helping clean up." No one moved. "NOW!"
The humans jumped to attention. Some did leave, quite a few actually. Trouble got up and scrambled away, yelling profanities back at us. Everyone else began to squeamishly pick up the body parts, piling them up to be burned. I kept busy, though my mind pulsed with questions. Chief among them were the shadows. Who were they? What did they want and why? Something would have to be done. But what? How could we find them, and what if they staged another attack?
Things had just gotten a lot more complicated.
Enia: Heh heh heh, I lied. :)