|Szayel vs The Internet
Author: WanderingGambler PM
Aizen decides it's time to bring the internet to Las Noches and Szayel's not happy about it, in more ways than one.Rated: Fiction K - English - Humor/Parody - Szayelaporro G. & Nnoitra G. - Words: 505 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11-14-10 - Status: Complete - id: 6477091
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A/N: This story is at least over 9000 years old...or at least something I did to kill the boredom a while back when I had the flu. And as such, it's a heap of crap. However, since I'm getting into the habit of posting stories from my old Quizilla account (and this was one of the lesser of many evils), here it is!
"Wait, so we can find whatever we want just by typing it in here?" Szayel asked, his ego having been slightly damaged due to the possibility that his "research" would soon be obsolete.
"Yes..." Aizen sighed, this was probably the hundredth time that the octava epsada had asked him that question in the past hour, he always made such a drama out of things.
"LET'S USE IT TO WATCH PORN!"
"Nnoitra, you're not going to find porn on the internet. Now stop yelling, you piece of trash." Ulquiorra stated with the slightest hint of irritation. Clearly the poor oblivious cuarta espada had no idea what he was talking about.
"What did you say emospada?" Grimmjow yelled, almost revealing the fact that he was inwardly a pervert, since he was clearly as upset as the serial rapis-Spoo-Nnoitra was. Needless to say both of them soon unleashed holy hell. During which, Aizen left the room to go make tea, never to return, Stark decided the internet clearly wasn't worth half the trouble it cause and went to the other room to take a nap, Barragan died of old age, Orihime was rescued, Hallibel went and got her back, and so the cycle continued until finally...they stopped.
"I have an idea!" Szayel proclaimed "Since I am a perfect being! And just absolutely fantastic in every way we should search my name in the internet!"
"All those who want to kill pinky, raise your hand now!" Nnoitra said, though being as tall as he was, the instant he went to raise his hand he smacked it off of the roof and was forced to bring it down again.
"Well" Szayel began, pushing up his glasses as he spoke. "Since there are clearly no objections I think we should go ahead, don't you?"
Of course, in typing his own name poor, innocent Szayel had no idea of what google had in store for him... 'SzayelXIllforte Yaoi'.
"What is yaoi?" Ulquiorra asked.
"I don't know, but it clearly involves me so it must be absolutely fabulous" Well, little did he know he was soon going to regret clicking that link.
"Hey Szayel isn't Illforte your broth-OH MY GOD" Grimmjow had a look of absolute horror on his face. Now he would never be able to look at his fracción in the same way ever again.
"Heh, I knew it, HEY PET-SAMA, WE HAVE SOMETHING TO SHOW YOU!"
From that day forward, everyone with the exception of Nnoitra was mentally scarred, and Aizen would never again introduce the espada to the world of technology.