|An 85th Chance
Author: Whatsername Stardust PM
Neville left her, and every attempt to get her back has failed. But she has one more chance to be with the man she knows she still loves, but she doesn't know still loves herRated: Fiction K+ - English - Angst/Romance - Neville L. & Luna L. - Words: 1,324 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Published: 12-15-10 - Status: Complete - id: 6558742
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
"I'm…I'm sorry Luna. And I do love you. I love you more than any person in the entire world. And I do want you. But right now, with the war having just ended, there are too many memories around you. I need time. But if you don't want to wait for me I'll understand." Luna could tell he was telling the truth, she was good at that. But it still broke her heart. He reached out to hug her, she obliged folding into his warm, broadshouldered frame like she used to. He kissed the top of her loose moonbeam colored curls and whispered a 'see you later' before giving her a weak smile and apparating out.
That was six months ago. They still wrote letters, though they never made phone calls or visited each other. Neither dated. Until she met Rolf. He was nice enough, smart enough, handsome enough. So when he asked her to dinner, she said yes. And after another six months, when he asked her to move in with him, she said yes again. She had given up hoping Neville would run after her. So when Rolf got down on one knee and proposed with a ring that was utterly un-Luna like, she said yes anyway. Even though she didn't love him. And Hermione frowned when she told her, but said she was happy she seemed happy. After the wedding invite went unanswered, she stopped sending Neville letters.
She went through life by going through the motions, although about three years after their wedding they stopped having sex. Rolf didn't seem to care. He continued showering her with gifts she didn't want or need. She'd tell him she loved him back whenever he said he loved her. And sometimes if she closed her eyes and thought really hard she believed it. Hermione smiled sadly whenever she and Luna saw each other. She asked about Neville, and Luna acted like it didn't hurt that he never sent her letters.
Sometimes she could almost forget he had ever been her friend, but then she'd see his name in the Prophet, or in a Ministry report, and it would all rush back. She saw him was, after she and Rolf had been married six years, in Diagon Alley. She almost said hi, but when he hurried into a shop she walked away.
Two things happened a little after her and Rolf's seven year anniversary. One was that she walked in on Rolf in bed with another woman. It didn't hurt. She'd never really loved him, and this gave her an excuse to leave him. The divorce wasn't messy. The second was she got a letter from Neville for the first time in seven years.
Dear Luna darling,
I miss you more than I can bear. I heard about you and Rolf, and I'm terribly sorry. I hope you can make yourself happier than he could. I know you won't respond to this. You didn't respond to the dozens of other letters. But know that if you need a friend or a shoulder to cry on, I'm here. I will always love you, Luna Lovegood. Be happy. You deserve that more than anyone in the world.
All my love,
Luna blinked. Dozens of letters? But Neville hadn't written since she and Rolf had…. Rolf. That was it. Rolf. Rolf always took care of the post. He knew about her and Neville's past, he'd probably hidden the letters. She apparated to his flat.
"Give them to me Rolf."
"Give you what"
"Every letter Neville wrote to me while we were married"
"I know you have them. Hand them over"
Rolf sighed and walked into the room, used his wand to open a hidden safe, and handed her a box full of letters. Some were long, and some were short. Each and every one seemed to begin with Dear Luna darling and end with All my love, Neville.
"Good bye" she said tersely as she apparated back to her own flat.
It took three days, but she read every letter. One in particular, from two months ago, stood out.
Dear Luna darling,
I'm sorry. I miss your voice. Your face. Your soft moon light colored hair. Your perfect, lavender eyes. Your slight fingers, and quirky fashion and your brilliant mind. I miss everything about you. I hope Rolf knows just what he has. I will regret until the day I die that I let my fairytale slip through my fingers. I love you. I love you so much it hurts me. Part of me is missing without you, Luna Lovegood. You are my heart. Please care for yourself. I hope you have the most wonderful life ever. I hope you've found bliss.
All of my love, always,
Luna was utterly in shock. Neville had written her a letter once a month for seven years, even though he never got a single response. He loved her. After all these years, he loved her. Through her being married to another man for seven years, and not speaking to her for seven years, he loved her still. She immediately flooed to Hermione's house to see what she thought.
A few hours later, Hermione sat with Luna on the floor of the house she shared with Harry, completely unsurprised.
"I knew it." She murmured "I knew he hadn't given up on you".
"But…what do I DO?"
"Well, you still love him, right?"
"Yes. I never stopped."
"And he obviously hasn't given up on you. I say go find him and give yourself a shot at the life that should have been yours years ago."
Luna smiled. Hermioene wasn't a rash human being, so she knew that was the right thing to do. So she gathered up every letter. All eighty four of them. She put them in her bag, leaving the first letter, the one she so desperately wished she had received, the first one that had been hidden, clutched in her hands. It read:
Dearest darling Luna,
Tomorrow you get married. I'm sorry I did not come after you sooner. I love you dearly, my darling. I hope Rolf can make you happy. If for some reason you still love me, know that I am here. You don't have to marry Rolf. My arms are always open to you, dearest. I wish you the best on your new life.
All my love forever,
Neville shook his head at his messy apartment. It was so messy, yet barren. He needed decorations. Or something to make it feel like home. He'd just moved. Maybe snapdragons? He though to himself.
There was a pop and a nervous squeak of a hello from the door.
He turned around only to find Luna standing there, feet turned it, pulling at her hair and staring at the grounf. He beamed and held back the urge to rush to her and hug her.
"Luna!" he grinned as he said her name.
"I've missed you. Why did you never write me back?"
"I never got your letters. He hid them all. I have them here" She showed him the basket of envelopes.
"I'm sorry. Guess I should have come looking?"
"I thought you hated me for marrying someone else. And I thought I hated you for hating me for that. But I don't think I ever did."
"I could never hate you, Luna. You're my world."
"...I still love you" her voice was shy and quiet.
Neville smiled and walked towards her, gathering her into his arms. He didn't kiss her. He didn't think she was ready for that. But he held her, tight and close"
"I love you too" he whispered.