Up in Smoke [Chapter One]
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Notes:
Weiss Kreuz is property of Koyasu Takehito, Kyoko Tsuchiya, Marine Entertainment, and Project Weiss.

This fic is based on the text of an RP session between my friend Kieran and I. Therefore, half the credit belongs to him. ^^ Well, at least the Ken half. *grins*

- White Kiss [formerly Rina Garet]
03/15/02, 2:38 pm

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Well, the evening had sucked.

And it hadn't even sucked WELL.

Youji brushed into the shared living room of Weiß's apartments, dropping his keys in the bowl on the table next to the door. Aya's idea, that was, and truthfully it wasn't a bad one. Kept Youji from losing his keys when he came home drunk some nights. He tossed his coat on the back of a chair and turned to look at the television, which was going quite loudly.

Ahh... Ken. Watching a late-night soccer game. Youji had to smile. Ken was so predictable sometimes. At Youji's entrance and closing of the door, Ken turned around to peer at him over the back of the couch. Then he looked at his watch and raised an eyebrow.

"Earlier than usual. Bad date?" he inquired.

Youji shrugged, slipping a pack of cigarettes out of his back pants pocket. He noticed Ken watching him, and winked over at the younger Weiß member. Ken blushed and turned back around to face the television. Wonderful, he couldn't even pretend he was watching the game now; some dumb commercial had come on.

Youji sauntered over to the couch and plopped himself down beside Ken. "What would you know about dates anyway?"

Ken crossed his arms. "It's not like I've never had any. Just because I don't announce it to the world like you do..."

Youji lit a cigarette and laughed with it between his lips. "That's right, Ken, don't be like me. Good man."

Ken uncrossed his arms and settled back into the couch, slightly confused at Youji's tone. There was a moment of utter silence as he stared at the television screen, and then slowly turned his eyes back to Youji. Usually the guy was more of a talker than this. He MUST have had a rotten night.

Youji raised an eyebrow, propping one foot up on the coffee table in front of the couch and exhaling a long puff of smoke. "So how's Kenken been today, eh?" his tone of voice was rather bored and strained. He wanted to go to bed, but he didn't want to go to bed alone, and his 'date' for the evening had come out all wrong, so he stayed up and tried to make small talk, figuring talking to Ken would be as good as talking to anyone else.

Ken paused for a minute, then replied. "Fine." He paused for another minute, then looked at Youji, slouched out on the couch and table. "Comfortable?"

"Quite."

Ken blinked. Yeah, Youji was definitely not in a good mood. Ken rubbed his chin. It was weird seeing Youji in a bad mood after a date. He tried to get to the level of Youji's mindset, and think of something stupid that might cheer him up.

"You're lucky I'm such a gentleman, or that position could be dangerous," he joked, trying to give an idiotic grin at Youji.

Youji barely moved, and flashed a tired smile. "Thinking about trying something while I'm not looking?"

"Eh, you don't really think I'd do something like that, do you?" Ken asked, only half serious.

"Baka." Youji breathed out another puff of smoke.

Ken flushed a bit. So much for cheering the guy up. And now he was distracted from his soccer game. He wasn't sure if he was angry at Youji for calling him stupid, or pissed at himself that he couldn't cheer him up.

"Feisty, aren't we..." Ken remarked, more to himself than for Youji.

"Always." Another clipped, one word answer. God, it was almost like trying to talk to Aya. That thought almost made Ken laugh, and he stared at Youji briefly, making sure he hadn't somehow mysteriously turned into Aya without Ken realizing it.

Youji caught him staring and the corners of his lips twitched into a soft grin. He plucked the cigarette from his mouth and handed it to Ken. It was an odd gesture of friendship from Youji, who normally didn't bother with men. Ken reluctantly took the offered, half-smoked cigarette, and looked at it, but didn't bring it to his lips.

"Just do it, Ken. It's not like you're in the J-League anymore, and with our profession, it's not like shortening your life span's gonna matter."

Ken popped the cigarette between his lips reluctantly, still confused at Youji's tone of voice. It was a friendly gesture he'd taken, and yet, his voice was harsh. So why was Youji staying out here with him instead of brooding alone in his room, like he usually did?

Grinning slightly, Youji shifted and sprawled out more across the couch, catching Ken unaware by propping one heel up on Ken's knee where he sat on the couch, crossing his other leg over it. Ken almost jumped, and then grumbled. Youji was taking up 3/4 of the couch. Not to mention had his shoes on Ken's jeans. He popped the cigarette back out of his mouth without really having smoked much, and frowned at Youji.

"Hope you wiped your feet, baka," Ken said, throwing the word back at Youji. "These are one of my better pairs of jeans!" In fact, they were his best pair, the only ones without rips.

"Eh, your jeans all have grass stains on them anyway, from playing soccer with all those rugrats."

Ken held the cigarette in his fingers and watched the smoke. "At least my clothes don't smell like alcohol, and..." he leaned over a little to sniff at Youji's clothes. "... cheap perfume."

"That's moderately expensive perfume, BAKA." Youji said, turning the word back on Ken again, reaching to take the cigarette back from him, if he wasn't going to smoke it.

Ken held it out of Youji's reach, meaning that he would have actually had to get up if he wanted to take it back. "Whatever you say, Yohtan." His voice was teasing.

Youji grunted, sitting up to take the cigarette back, and swinging his legs off Ken. "Watch it, soccer boy."

Ken sat up a little, feeling strange about the fact that it was almost amusing to annoy Youji. "What'cha gonna do about it? Wanna spar, string bean? I got time, not to mention excess energy to burn." He said, keeping his tone still teasing and joking. "Or is Yohtan too worn out from his nightly gallivanting?"

Youji cuffed him on the side of the chin, not hard, but enough to jolt the soccer player's ranting. Ken rubbed his chin and frowned.

"I forgot, only your little dates are allowed to call you Yohtan," Ken remarked, giving an idiotic, toothy grin.

"Better watch those pretty white teeth before I knock 'em out for you, Kenken," Youji said, making a point of using Ken's nickname. He thought about going to his room, but the thought of moving right now was just too damn much. He was in a bad mood, and tired, and hopefully Ken would know enough to shut up. It wasn't turning out like he'd hoped.

Ken, however, was all fueled up now, and in a bantering mood, regardless of the fact that he was annoying Youji. "Playboy's all riled up, must've hit a nerve."

Youji clamped his teeth down on the end of his dwindling cigarette. "Since when were you so damn interested in my dates, anyway?" he said, trying to steer away from the subject.

Ken genuinely grinned and shrugged. If he wanted to get friendly with Youji, maybe talking about girls was the way to do it. And Youji sure as hell knew a lot more about women than he did. Or so it seemed, at least.

"I dunno, Youji, sometimes I find your love life interesting." After all, Ken thought, his own love life was pretty nonexistent. Sure he'd had dates, but nothing ever amounted to much. No heavy relationships.

Youji's eyes actually glittered with mischief, and a grin spread on his lips. He looked at Ken with a slightly predatory gaze. "Oh? Thinking of taking a lesson or two?"

Ken swallowed hard. The look Youji gave him was unnerving him. So he thought Ken needed lessons, huh? That he didn't know anything? Ken's indignant temper flared a little at the knock, and he sat back and crossed his arms again. "What makes you think I need lessons? Maybe I was just trying to make conversation."

Youji laughed. Ken's temper and naiveté was altogether too cute sometimes. "I only make conversation with people I plan on getting in bed." He said, matter of factly, mostly just to watch Ken's reaction.

Ken had a feeling the mood of the conversation had just taken a violent shove into an area he wasn't sure he wanted to play around in. He hadn't even seen Youji display anything more than indifference for men, but the look Youji was giving him right now was one he'd only seen Youji turn on women. Pretty women. Pretty women he slept with.

Youji watched Ken's flustered reaction, and chuckled softly. He wasn't sure where he was going with any of this. He only knew he was desperate for company at the moment, and was going about it the only way he really knew how.

Ken felt like he was being played with.

In a quick flash of temper, he pinned Youji against the couch and plucked the almost-gone cigarette from his lips, giving a bit of a growl. "What, have a bad date so it's time to come home and play with reliable old Ken? Or would you have done it with the others, too? Do you play with everyone?"

Youji didn't flinch underneath Ken. "Aya's too cold, and Omi's too young." He smirked. Ah, predictable, predictable Ken.

Ken pushed Youji harder against the couch, and then suddenly let him go, curling up in the corner near the arm of the sofa. "So I'm your last resort, huh? Real smooth, Youji." Ken realized that he was holding the butt of Youji's cigarette still, and crushed it in the ashtray on the table. "And Aya hates when you smoke in here..." he said, trying to change the subject. At first he'd wanted to cheer Youji up, but something had happened and now he was feeling uncomfortable.

"Like I give a damn about what Aya says," Youji said offhandedly. "And you didn't really think I was serious, did you, Ken?" Youji thought the other guy would have been smart enough not to take anything he said to heart.

"Of course not. Who'd ever be serious about me?" Ken muttered. Youji sensed that Ken's comment was laced with something that he was altogether too familiar with. Sarcasm.

"Didn't you know, Ken? Nice guys finish last." Youji quipped.

Ken grinned despite himself. Youji was an ass, sometimes. "Knowing you, that's got some hentai double meaning."

Youji chuckled softly. "See, you're already learning." Then he sighed. "You're a nice guy, Ken. Don't let me fuck that up for you."

Ken just stared blankly for a minute. "I know what you think." Youji smiled and tapped his finger on Ken's forehead, then leaned back into the couch, lighting up another cigarette. He was chain-smoking tonight, what did it matter? "I know what you all think."

"Oh yeah?" Ken sounded skeptical.

Youji laughed, but it was mirthless. "That I can't possibly be lonely. Youji, always on the move, always on the prowl, always out on the town." He laughed again, just as mirthless as before.

Ken didn't say anything, just listened.

"Well, none of that means shit, Ken. The quicker you learn that, the happier you'll be. Alone doesn't equal lonely. And vice versa."

Ken kept quiet, but reluctantly put his hand on Youji's shoulder. Youji didn't look at him, didn't move.

"You don't have to pretend you care, Ken. The way I live, I don't expect anything from anybody." Ken didn't move his hand. He smiled a soft, almost bitter smile.

"Then why live?"

Youji's face went blank. Then he smiled. It was a painful smile, a smile that showed just how old Youji was, and how much he'd seen and lived through.

"We don't, Ken. We survive."

Youji let out one last breath of smoke, and took his cigarette from his lips, holding it lightly. Ken reached over, plucking the cigarette from Youji's fingers, and set it between his own lips, taking a small drag.

He exhaled, with a pensive expression on his face. "Yeah..." he said, and handed the cigarette back to Youji. His lips parted, as if to speak, but no sound came out. Youji watched him intently, his eyes telling Ken to finish whatever it was he was going to say. Ken smiled softly and turned away, before finishing his thought.

"And we watch our past go up in smoke." He laughed softly.

Youji smiled.