The amnesiac swordsman

Chapter 8: Shift Stone Fun Part 2

"Behold the mighty power of the Furious Five's Tigress!" After using the shift stone, Laobu (now turned into Po) went inside his master's room and played with his Furious five action figures. He played with Tigress' figure and fought it off against Monkey. "The acrobatic Master Monkey is skillful, but can he take on Master Tigress and her fearsome strength?"

"Po," Laobu jumped as he turned back to see where the voice came from, it was Monkey. "Did you hear about Shifu saying we have the day off?"

"Oh yeah, I was there when he told Zeng." He answered in the panda's voice.

"Don't you think it's a little weird?" Monkey asked. "Shifu's not the one to just let us have a day off, besides he was supposed to show us a new secret technique."

"I'm not sure what to say about it, but that's what Shifu said." Laobu answered. "But it does sound like a good idea, everybody needs a break. Plus it's fun to just have some time to ourselves."

"Po, are you feeling okay?" Crane came in as he heard the two conversed. "Even you know this sounds weird, and yet you're not very worried."

"Really, I guess I'm having a silly day." The two looked to each other as the disguised dog laughed. "Crane, can you tell me that story of yours again?"

"The one about the teapot the rickshaw cart, and the hot pepper?" Crane asked.

"Yeah I love that one, it always makes me laugh. Tell it again please?"

"Um… okay sure." Crane seemed to smile about that. "I got some more stories if you wanna listen."

"Awesome!"

Meanwhile on the other side of the palace, Chenmo (disguised as Shifu) walked around the empty training hall. "Hm, what can I do to mess with the raccoon now?"

"Master Shifu," Tigress came through the door and saw the disguised fox inside. "What's going on, why give us a day off?"

'Why? Has this chick never heard of a day off? The raccoon must be a work-a-holic.' She thought to herself and went back to the master before her. "A day off is good once in a while, just relax."

"Master, you never do something like this without a reason." Tigress replied. "Is something going on?"

"As a matter of fact, yes there is." Chenmo smirked, she had a great plan. "You see… I have a dance class to attend."

"A… A what?" Tigress was dumbfounded.

"That's right; lately I have started taking dance classes." The disguised fox spun and pranced about in the master's body. "I think it makes me rather elegant, don't you think?"

"Master Shifu, are you serious?" She asked.

"Now why would I not, ta-ta for now." Chenmo walked off with a devilish smirk on her face as she made her way outside to the palace steps. 'This is great, I'm so gonna have more fun with this.'

"Master Shifu!" Po called as he ran up to the disguised fox.

"Laobu, you're here." The dog skidded to a stop embarrassed.

"H-How'd you know it was me?" He asked nervously.

"It's me, Chenmo. Besides, your tail kept wagging." Chenmo pointed to the stubby bear tail swaying left and right happily. "What exactly were you up to?"

"Oh, I was in Po's room playing with action figures. Then I went and hung out with Crane, he has really cool stories." His excitement only grew as he was heard in Po's voice. "This is severely cool! Hey, where are you going?"

"Away from here, I'm gonna see what I can do to the raccoon in front of the whole village." Chenmo smirked until her stomach growled. "But first it'd be good to get something to eat."

"I know the perfect place, follow me!" Laobu hurried down the stairs while his vixen friend quickly followed.

"Lead the way, fat boy."

"Laobu, where are you?" The real Po searched around for his student and friend in the hall of warriors, but to no avail he couldn't find them. "Where could he have gone?"

"Chenmo is gone as well." Shifu stood by the moon pool in thought. "I have a feeling something is happening because of her."

"You think so?"

"Po," Viper called to the dragon warrior while the rest of the five followed. "Can you help me with my make up again?"

"What, makeup?" Po asked.

"You helped me with my makeup remember?" Po had no clue what she meant, but he did notice that she was prettier.

"Then after that, could you show me more Japanese calligraphy?" Crane asked. "I had no idea you had so much philosophy."

"No way, first you gotta show us that trick." Monkey argued.

"Yeah, that trick with the bowl and chopsticks was hilarious." Mantis included. "You gotta show us."

"What, what did I do?" Po was too confused to answer everyone.

"Master Shifu, I still want to know if this dance class is a joke." Tigress asked.

"Tigress, what are you talking about?" Shifu thought for a moment and said. "It appears everyone has been tricked, and by a certain fox I bet."

"Chenmo, that conniving little vixen." Tigress growled. "She tricked all of us."

"I don't know, when we met Po he was still pretty much the same as usual." Crane said. "I don't think she could pull off Po so easily."

"What does that mean?" He asked.

"Po, it's obvious she doesn't like you." Mantis said bluntly, the panda sighed since he knew it was true.

"The Po we met was pretty normal, well… there was this one thing I noticed." Monkey pointed out. "Every time you talked your tail wagged a lot."

"My tail wagged, could it be…" Po shook his head, "Nah, it couldn't be him."

"Master, look what I've found." The other's looked as Viper went over to the shift stone box and found a bundle of papers. "There's a note on top."

Dear Master Shifu

I'm really sorry; please don't be mad at me or Chenmo. You see I was showing her all the weapons here and we came to the shift stones, I told her about them and she ended up using one to turn into you. I tried to stop her, but she tempted me by becoming Po; we left the shift stone back in the box though so don't worry. I'm very sorry, please don't let Po know.

Sincerely,

Laobu

P.S: I never noticed, but when you're mad or annoyed your ears twitch a lot.

P.P.S: Po's belly is really jiggly!

"That's it?" Po asked. "What about the rest of the papers?"

"The rest are just sketches." Shifu went skimmed to the end to see a little chibi dog, he flew back and saw the little animation bow up and down apologetically. "Your student is quite the artist."

"Hehe, well… at least he was kind enough to leave a note." Po sighed trying to laugh the situation off. "We gotta find them, or our reputations will be ruined."

"Or at least, Shifu's will be." Mantis joked

"All of you will search if they're here in the palace," Shifu instructed. "Po and I will go search down in the valley."

"Yes Master."

Down in the valley of peace, the villagers cheered in joy near Ping's noodle shop. "Po, tables 2, 3, and four need noodles."

"On it, Dad, three bowls coming at ya!" Laobu smiled in the Panda's body holding the bowls of noodles on his arms, he lifted them into the air and with his belly fired them right at the exact tables they were supposed to be.

"Thanks, Dragon Warrior!" The customers were happy and ate with delight as the disguised dog catered to them with giddy enthusiasm.

"Po this is great, the shop has gotten so many customers today." Mr. Ping hugged the dog as much as he could with his small wings. "And here I thought you were going to be busy with Kung Fu."

"I'd never be busy for you, I love you, Dad." He said smiling.

"Mr. Ping, are you coming to finish the game?" Chenmo waited in the kitchen where she was playing a game of mahjong with the goose in Shifu's form.

"Oh yes, I must say Shifu you've gotten much better at the game, its five to five in our wins." Ping went back to the table and placed his tiles down. "I call."

"Call, all triple straights." She said smiling.

"Oh you won again." The goose huffed. "Now how did you get so good, Po didn't teach you my secrets did he?"

"No, just years of practice that's all." Drinking the last bit of soup in her bowl, Chenmo stood up and walked out of the kitchen. "Thank you for the food, Mr. Ping. I need to take Po off for some… secret training."

"Oh yes, come again soon."

"Po, we're leaving." She called to Laobu who was busy kissing babies.

"Aw okay, good to see everybody." He waved goodbye and quickly caught up with the disguised vixen. "This is really fun, and I think everyone really loves Po more."

"This whole thing was to mess with their reputation not make it better." Chenmo sighed. "Whatever, at least the raccoon is gonna get a rude awakening."

"Hey we're leaving the valley, where are we going?" Laobu asked.

"A little place I found before coming here, I'm gonna end this fun with a little bang."

Meanwhile, the real Po and Shifu came down from the palace and searched the valley with no avail. Po scratched his head in thought. "Where could they have gone?"

"I'm not sure, but something tells me something bad is about to happen." Shifu answered the panda as he was suddenly smacked by a goats hoof. He looked to his left to see Mrs. Yoon. "M-Mrs. Yoon, what is the problem."

"You lecherous red panda, trying to play with my emotions in such a haughty way," Mrs. Yoon turned to Po and smiled. "Po, thank you so much for helping me sell my dumplings. You're just as sweet as I thought."

"Oh yeah, no problem," Po answered as she waved goodbye in confusion. "Well it's obvious they were here, Laobu's got everyone liking me too. Though Chenmo is really making you a…" Po stopped himself from finishing, the glare from Shifu made him scared for the worse. "Never mind forget what I was gonna say."

"Things could not get much worse." Shifu sighed as the sound of wings flapping reached his ears; Zeng flew down from the palace frantically as he landed down.

"M-Master Shifu, I…"

"This had better be good news." He replied. The bird fell on death ears as he looked nervously at the master.

"Well um… there is some news to tell." Zeng said.

"Yes?"

"Well a funny thing really," Zeng forced a few laughs. "It seems the sacred war hammer of Lei Lang… has been taken."

"… It's what!" Shifu exclaimed.

"T-The hammer in the palace is a fake, the real one has been taken somehow." Zeng stepped back in fear.

"But how, the hammer was couldn't have just…" Shifu's anger rose to its peak as one name to who could have stolen the hammer came to mind. "Chenmo…"

"Give me another drink here!" Chenmo had taken Laobu to a sleezy bar a few miles away from the valley of peace. The dog sat beside her nervously as she drunk another glass of baijiu (white liquor). "Man, I've been missing a good drink."

"C-Chenmo, isn't this going too far?" Laobu looked around as he saw a few thieves and crooks around them. "There are a lot of bad guys here, and they don't like Po or Shifu either."

"Oh relax, it's not like they can do anything to us." She smirked taking another drink. "Besides, they try to pull anything… then I'll use this on them." Chenmo grabbed an object wrapped up in cloth on her side and unwrapped it a little to show the sacred hammer of Lei Lang.

"Are you insane, Chenmo why did you bring that here?" He whispered. "This is really bad; any bad guy who knows what that is will stop at nothing to get it. Not to mention that it'll destroy anything if it touches the ground. Shifu is gonna be really really mad."

"Don't worry about that raccoon, he won't find out about anything."

"And what have we here?" The two paid attention to the person on the other side of the table, a small man with big brownish eyes stared at them with a subtle yet menacing glare. "Master Shifu and the Dragon Warrior, I never expected seeing you two in a place like this."

"T-Tong Fo, what are you doing here?" Laobu asked.

"The real question is what are you doing here?" He responded.

"Who's the big eyed midget?" Chenmo whispered.

"That's Tong Fo; the one Po got the hammer from." The dog whispered nervously. "This is really bad; we have to get out of here before he notices…"

"Notices the war hammer of Lei Lang is with you?" Tong Fo heard them, at least enough to hear about the weapon. "Now what do you expect to do with that in a place like this? Not only that, but in a place like this with several crooks, it'll be hard to escape with it unscathed. You really should've thought this through before challenging someone smarter than you, but even then you would never beat me."

"That's a smart mouth for someone with big eyes." Chenmo retorted.

"I don't have big eyes; my brain is just bigger than my skull." He shot back. "If you insist on fighting for the hammer that's just fine, but so many enemies around might make it harder for you."

The vixen growled as a small flame grew in her paw, but she quickly dispersed it so not to break her cover. Chenmo had to think of a plan somehow, so she went with the only one she had. "Alright, why don't we make a little bet then?"

"A bet?" Tong Fo asked.

"A drinking game, we'll see which one of us can hold their liquor." She answered. "The first one drunk loses, and the victor wins the hammer."

"An interesting proposal, you want to challenge me to a battle of stamina then, Shifu?" He laughed. "I must warn you, I'm very well known for holding my baijiu."

"Oh not me, the dragon warrior will challenge you." The vixen gestured to the disguised panda.

"What?" Laobu whispered. "Chenmo, why do I have to do this?"

"Because I can't challenge him after the many drinks I had, you can do it." She replied.

"B-But… I don't think I can hold my liquor."

"Are you two done talking?" Tong Fo had already poured two glasses for him and the dog. "I'm ready to show you why you should never challenge me to a drinking game."

"Okay then um… you first." Laobu watched nervously as the villain drunk his glass with no problems.

"Now then, ready to give up dragon warrior?" He asked.

Laobu held his glass staring back at his fox friend for help, but since she wasn't much of help right now he decided to do what he had to do. He drunk the baijiu in one gulp and slammed the glass back down on the table. "Hm. Rather impressive dragon warrior, I never thought you would drink with such vigor."

"That's just the kind of dragon warrior I am, so you might wanna give-!" Liquor was definitely something the dog couldn't handle, Laobu fell head first on the table completely unconscious.

"I was right all along; you two are nothing but imposters." Tong Fo smirked. "Did you honestly think you could fool one as intelligent as me? Neither Shifu or the Dragon Warrior would drink alcohol, you're nothing but imposters. So I'll be taking my hammer now if you don't mind."

"Well you're right about one thing, but you should see what happens to my friend when he drinks." Chenmo smiled as she looked back to her unconscious friend.

"Master, how are we supposed to find those two now?" Po, Shifu, and the five had already made their way out of the valley and were searching for the two disguised friends.

"I knew that fox couldn't be trusted, taking the hammer of Lei Lang must've been her plan all along." Tigress growled.

"Come on, you don't know that." Po assured.

"And you do? Wake up Po, she's tricked everyone including the one she called a friend!" She shot back.

"Tigress, you gotta calm down." Monkey said.

"We'll find them; we just have to find some clues." As Crane said that, a piercing shout and had echoed out to them.

"Yep, that's good enough a clue to me." Mantis said.

"Follow that sound." Shifu lead the six as they ran to where the sound was, they found a small bar that had holes with several sleezy thieves and criminals that had been beaten unconscious. The door was suddenly destroyed as Tong Fo was thrown out in front of them. "Tong Fo? What are you up to now?"

"Shifu? So they were imposters." Tong Fo grunted in pain as he got back up.

"Imposters?" Po knew what that meant.

"Raaaaagh!" The same shout from before came from Laobu as he stared back with menacing eyes. "You should never mess with the dragon warrior, he's so strong that he… he… he can be really sleepy."

"It's amazing how powerful he is, and all he took was one glass of baijiu." The small villain hissed.

"Wait, you mean that Laobu…"

"He's drunk?" Everyone watched as the drunken dog woke back up in a daze and wobbled out of the bar.

"Ugh, baijiu tastes so weird… like a snake slithering down my throat." Laobu hiccupped walking a bit wobbly; not noticing an angry gorilla was creeping from behind with his own war hammer.

"Hey, look out!" Mantis warned.

"Wha?" The gorilla swung his hammer at full force, but Laobu leaned back as the swing missed him by the nose. "It's not nice to attack someone from behind!" While still leaning back he punched the gorilla with great force and launched him to the back of the bar before falling on his back. "Oh dear, everything is upside down. Or am I right side up in an upside down world? Hehe, I think Baba would laugh if he heard that."

"I swear, just one gulp and you turn into a drunken powerhouse." Chenmo walked out until she was beside the dazed dog.

"Well it's your fault!" A wolf and three boars charged at the two of them, Laobu sprung back to his feet and dodged their blows with dazed and fluid grace. "I hate drinking liquor and you know that I can't hold it like you, why do you always make me do things I don't want to do?" He dropped kicked one of the boars and fell down when another swung at him with his sword, since he dodged it he grabbed the second boar with his feet and slammed him flat on his face to the floor before getting back up. "Mm, and now everyone is mad at Po. I wanted people to like him more, he's always super cool and awesome but now he has more enemies." Grabbing the wolf by his tail, Laobu swung with awesome strength and threw him and the last boar right out of the bar.

"He knows drunken Kung Fu?" Viper looked in amazement. "It's amazing, I never suspected him to have that much skill."

"Hey, Tong Fo is gone." Tigress said, the rest looked around but to no avail found him. "He must've escaped during the commotion."

"No need to worry, he's not a problem at the moment." Shifu assured, and then turned back to the two friends. "Laobu, Chenmo."

"Master Shifu?" The dazed dog looked back and saw Po, his expression turned to a giddy gleefulness jumping up to hug the real panda. "Po, I'm glad to see you again! Being you is cool, I wish I could be you for *hic* for real but I know I couldn't."

"That's enough; you both are in a load of trouble." Shifu spoke.

Laobu and Chenmo sat in the kitchen back in their normal forms as Shifu and the other's looked back to them at the other side of the table. Shifu kept a stern eye on them and the war hammer in the middle of the table and said, "You both used my shift stone without permission, using them to ruin the dragon warrior and my reputation."

"Well the only one whose reputation was ruined was…" The red panda's glare went back to Po to shut him up.

"Not only that, but you stole the war hammer of Lei Lang." He finished. "Give me a reason why I shouldn't punish you both."

Chenmo sighed. "Look it's…"

"It's my fault." Laobu said. "I told Chenmo all about the stone and the hammer; I brought her to the hall of warriors and was too weak when she asked me to have some fun with the stones. It's all my fault, I'm sorry… I'm so sorry." The dog teared up a little through his confession.

"Laobu, come on don't cry." Po felt bad already.

"I don't blame you for this Laobu; you've done nothing but be yourself… in your own way." Shifu looked back to Chenmo. "As for you, Chenmo…"

"Yeah I know, but just so you know." Chenmo grabbed the hammer and raised it ready to hit the ground.

"No, Chenmo stop!" Laobu pleaded but was too late; she slammed the hammer with great force. But to everyone's surprise, the hammer turned to dust. "A fake?"

"You honestly think I'd bring something that powerful?" Chenmo asked. "I may not listen to you much, but I can tell when you're serious about something. I hid the real hammer behind that shield in the hall of warriors."

"Wow, she tricked us more than we thought." Crane said impressed.

"Once a fox always a fox." Tigress huffed.

"If that is the case, then I think I've made a suitable punishment for you." Shifu stood from his chair and looked back at the vixen. "You will stay and train in Kung Fu, just like the rest of us."

"What, why should I?" She asked.

"I think that's a great idea, Chenmo's good with a sword but totally sucks when it comes to hand to hand." Laobu smiled dodging a few punches from the fox. "Hehe, see?"

"Shut up, fatso!" She punched again only for her fist to be grabbed and swung back to the ground.

"Then it's settled, you'll start tomorrow." Shifu stepped from his chair and made his way out.

"Shifu, where are you going?" Po asked.

"I need to… fix what she's done." Shifu muttered. 'I might have taken in more than I can handle with those two."

To be continued

Finally done, sorry bout that. Chapter 9 coming soon.