Author: Dat fucking writefag PM
Crossover with Cowboy Bebop and FiM. Twilight Sparkle has found something in her studies which is about to be the discovery of the century.Rated: Fiction M - English - Mystery - & Spike S. - Chapters: 11 - Words: 44,839 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 01-04-13 - Published: 02-22-11 - id: 6767601
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Session β: Overture of the paddock – part one -
He raised his right hand and pointed his finger to the remaining Syndicate thugs. He grinned victoriously.
He fell. But he didn't feel the impact of the stone hard stairs hitting his face. Everything went dark around him. Then the cold kicked in. It didn't matter anymore anyway. The dream was finally over. He finally found peace.
He woke up and found himself in the same stairway he fell on again. But something was different this time. There was only the stairway; the sky, the floor before and after the stairs, everything was gone and was replaced by darkness. Looking up he realized that the number of the stairs increased, crimson carpet over it like a thread he should follow. Up there was a familiar light. He decided to go up. There weren't many options anyway. His hands in his pockets he climbed step by step, in a long endless journey of reaching the light. What felt like an eternity, he finally passed the last step and entered the light.
He found himself in a train station; not the one he was used to, the nostalgic ones from those old western movies. It was dusk, an orange heaven spread over him, as if it was burning with the sun's fire. He walked over a smooth surfaced floor, alongside the rails which followed him like a scar. He reached a public bench, two column pillars standing beside both endings. Above it was this ad "Son of a Gun" of this Cowboy wannabe he couldn't remember his name. Only this time it was he himself who was on this ad, holding his trademark gun and grinning like an idiot. The cowboy huffed at annoyance.
"Hey, buddy, long time no see", came the deep voice in front of him. He looked down the bench. On one seat was a green frog. It raised his one foot and made a greeting gesture and...smiled?
"Oh great, you again", Spike sighed and crossed his arms.
"Yo, man, show some li'l respect, it's not my fault I was born as a frog", the green amphibian whined.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever", Spike was fumbling all over his clothes, but couldn't find what he was looking for. "I suppose frogs don't have something to smoke, do they?"
"Hey, we aren't called classy for a reason." Suddenly out of nothing his left foot he had a cigarette between his fingers, his right one holding a zippo lighter. Spike took the thin cylinder and bowed closely to the frog so it could lighten the cigarette up.
"Thanks", the bounty hunter said and took a long breath from the smoke, the cherry pop on the other end glowing in the dusky heaven.
"So, what yer doin' here?", the green amphibian asked.
"Waitin' for my train coming", came the reply from the human.
"Oh, then you have just missed the last one. The next one will come much much later", it shook its head apologizing.
"Well, then I got no choice but to wait", Spike said and sat beside the frog.
They remained quiet for a while, both enjoying the warm weather and the scenery in front of them. Winged monkeys were flying on the sky, traveling to the north. A cold wind was breezing Spike's hairs a little, while he was smoking his cigarette.
"So",the frog started and looked up to Spike. "You finally woke up from the dream?"
"Yeah, I did", the bounty hunter answered, removing the cigarette to puff in the air with smoke rings. "It was a crappy one, but still worth the time."
"Hell, man, I can't blame ye. I mean, who would want to dream being a lowlife bounty hunter?",the frog babbled, receiving a look from the bounty hunter. "No offense, man."
"None taken", Spike said calmly, and looked around. "Am I the only one here?"
"Yeah. There was a girl here however. A blonde one", Spike's eyes opened wide when he heard the frog's reply. "We had some really nice conversation."
"And? What she said?", the bounty hunter tried to remain calm.
"Oh, sorry, can't tell ye, I promised her to keep it as a secret."
"Huh, a frog with a code of honor", Spike grumbled and took a long breath from the smoke.
"However, she told me if a guy with fuzzy hair should show up, I should tell him something", the frog said and eyed Spike critically. "Hey, come to think of it, it matches your profile."
"So, what's the message?", Spike mumbled while having his last smoke between his lips.
" 'Don't wake up' ". Spike gave another look to the green amphibian.
"What does that mean?", was his question.
"I dunno, she entered the train immediately after saying this. Didn't even say a Goodbye to me. Women, really, nothing but trouble...", the frog sighed and shook his head.
"I hear ye", Spike agreed.
The conversation between them went on, grasping different topics, both of them giving their two mulons about any matter they could come up with. Then, after what also felt like an eternity, a train came. The locomotive with a smooth violet surface and possessing a boiler in the form of a horn , each wagon of the train had a different color with different symbols plastered on them. Spike finally took his last smoke and threw the tip of cigarette away.
"Looks like my train has finally arrived", he said with a smoking sigh and got up.
"Yer sure that's the right one?", the frog asked uncertain.
"Yeah, got a feeling it's the one", Spike said, cracking his neck. The door opened and he started to enter the train. "Well, was nice knowing ye."
"See you then, Space Cowboy",the frog said, winking with its tiny foot. "Little advice for you, from frog to man: Confound these ponies, they drive you to drink."
"Huh?",Spike looked back and wanted to go out as he realized something. But the doors shut down quickly.
"HEY WAIT!", the bounty hunter screamed and hit the doors panicked. But the train started to move finally.
Damn, he took the wrong train.
He heard a voice. It was the one of a woman, the tone a really gentle one. She was humming something, something really beautiful. Spike never heard this song before, but still, really beautiful. Then, the voice stopped, and the singer seemed like placing something on a table near by. He wanted to open his eyes, but he felt so tired. He didn't want to wake up.
"Ehmm, Twilight, are you sure it was a good idea bringing him here?He looks kinda...scary", he heard another voice of a woman whispering softly.
"Of course it's alright",the more confident sounding voice replied. It switched then to an worn up giggle. "Oh my god, this is so exciting, a real life angel! This is much better than I hoped for!"
What, angel? Did she meant him? Oh, the irony.
"But he doesn't look like one", a voice of another woman commented, this one was raspy. "I mean, aren't angels supposed to have...I dunno, wings?"
No shit, Wattson.
"Appearance can be deceiving. We can ask him all this once he regains full consciousness", replied the confident voice.
God, couldn't these chicks be quiet? All their voices were ringing like bells in his head.
"So, how d'we know when he wakes up?", another female voice with a redneck accent asked.
"He was put under cyrogenic freeze as far as I figured out. It is some sort of artificial coma. But if I have done it right, he should be up in an hour or so.", the confident voice was replying.
Huh, this explained why he felt like crap.
"Now, where is this dragon? I got to report this to Princess Celestia immediatly! This is the discovery of a century!" The voice of this confident smug girl was getting on his nerves already. "Spike? Spiiike? Where are you, Spike?"
"I'm right here, dammit", Spike grumbled. "Can't you give a man his beauty sleep?"
A round of shocked gasps were triggered by his surprising answer, but he didn't care. Damn, women were nothing but trouble, that frog was right. He hated when frogs were right. He still kept his eyes closed as he got up, raised his arms, and yawned like a lazy lion.
"He's...he's awake already!", the one redneck voice shouted aloud.
"Morning to you too, sunshine", Spike shot back absently, his throat strained like dried beef. The voices were whispering around him in an uncertain way, as if they didn't know how to handle the situation. Damn, what has gotten into them? Never seen a man before?
The bounty hunter started feeling his bare chest as he scratched it, breathing in and out. The he felt his legs and the fabric of baggy pants over them. He cross-legged and pushed with his right arm his head to receive a satisfying CRACK from his neck, his eyes still closed from his exhaustion.
"Uhhh...how are you feeling?", the confident sounding voice asked, a hint of fear was detected by Spike.
"Like being in a bad dream you can't wake up from. The usual", the bounty hunter replied calmly. "So how long have I been out cold?"
Another round of whispers. Boy, they sure do talk a lot, he thought. The confident voice said again: "Well, we can't say for sure, but-"
"Whatever, sorry I asked", Spike interrupted her abruptly, annoyed by all this girly gushing. He fumbled on his trousers to look for a pack of smokes, but to no avail. "Say, you don't have any cigarettes around, do you?"
"What's a cigarette?", a high pitch voice of a girl asked. Spike blinked mentally. Okay, the bounty hunter concluded, where I landed is not up with current modern times.
He sighed and opened his eyes slightly to make a sarcastic retort. But then he stopped. His eyes opened wide, noticing what was before him.
He saw ponies; ponies everywhere,each of them in different colors. He looked around carefully. It were six totally. Two of them had wings, the other two had horns on their head.
He took an extra notion of the one nearest of him. This was a violet pony...or unicorn? Anyway, this one was breathing hysterically, from the tone he concluded this was the one with the smug confident voice. Wait, this could talk?
He eyed her with half close eyes then and remained silent. Then suddenly, he grabbed her snooze and opened it forcefully, causing the pony to gasp at surprise.
"He-hey, wha' a' ye' 'oing?", the pony asked shocked. Spike said nothing and looked inside the yap. It didn't resembled the anatomy he knew from a normal horse. It even had an uvula at the end, just like a human.
"Eh", he groaned and let go of the pony's yap. He gave her his cold shoulder then and lied back to the bed, eyes closed again. "I must be still under drugs or something."
"How rude!" The confident pony lost her coolness and rambled angrily: "What does he think he is?"
"Ehm", the more softer voice tried to answer shyly. "I think he thinks we aren't real."
"'Course you ain't real", the bounty hunter chuckled humorlessly. "I mean, talking horses; seriously? I'd rather hit a cold shower than to argue with you critters right now." Spike then tried to get sleep again. Once he had clear senses again, he could then figure out where he was.
"Well...if ye say so", the redneck voice replied uncertainly. "Rainbow Dash, would ye?"
"His wish is granted!", the raspy voice answered proudly and Spike heard a dashing in the air.
Then he felt ice cold water pouring down him, knocking his senses back to reality.
"WAAH!", he screamed and jumped up out startled. "That was a figure of speech, you stupid..."
He stopped and looked down. They were still here, those...
"...Ponies?", he finished the sentence, his mind not processing what was before him. Even with sharp senses, he still couldn't believe it. He must have been still dreaming, there was no other way. He took notion of the surrounding then:
Spike was in some sort of wooden house. Wait, the house seemed to be a tree itself! He was standing in the highest floor of this tree, because he saw stair leading downstairs. The bounty hunter saw several decorations like a cuckoo clock, but that wasn't worth the attention. But what he noticed was the huge number of bookshelves on the walls which stored a alot of books, making it appear to be a library or something. He turned to his bed and saw a white cloud floating before him. On it sat a blue and winged pony whose tail and mane had rainbow colors. Behind her was a window shut by yellow curtains.
"Ehehe, hi", the blue flying horse said, nervously chuckling. It was the one with the raspy voice. Spike gave her a blank stare. Then he pushed her to the side roughly, causing the pony to shout "WOAH",removed the curtains and looked outside the window.
"What the hell?", Spike yelled. He saw a small village, the kind of rustic village where you would take a vacation if you had enough of your job and family. But there were no humans outside. There were ponies, everywhere just sponies! Flying ponies, normally trotting ponies, chatting ponies, his whole view was filled with ponies. This wasn't a dream. It was a nightmare!
"Look, I know you may be confused right now, Mr. Angel", the violet pony said to the horrified bounty hunter. "So please, let me explain-"
"You there, the yellow one with the wings", Spike interrupted her and pointed a finger at said pony.
"M-me?", the yellow pegasus meeped, revealed herself to be the one with the soft shy voice, and hid her snooze between her mane.
"Yeah, you, come over here", Spike said annoyed. The pegasus looked uncertain at the others and crawled towards the bounty hunter. She was barely half as big as Spike. He frowned down her, but then held his hand before her.
"Bite my hand", he commanded.
"Wh-What?", she stuttered, her face turning pale at this order.
"I need to make sure I am not dreaming. Go on, bite it", the bounty hunter urged her, getting impatient.
"I-I don't now if I...", she was to terrified to continue and hid her snooze deeper between her mane.
"Don't worry Fluttershy, you can count on me!", the pink pony said, who had this high pitched voice. She jumped between the two of them, and bit into the bounty hunter's hand deeply.
"YOUCH!", Spike screamed out of pain, getting tears in his eyes. He withdrew his hand and railed against her. "Not so hard, dammit!"
"Hm, tastes like hotdogs", the pink one ignored him and licked her lips, probably enjoying having bitten him.
"You...you things are real!", Spike realized as he stared at his bitten hand wide eyed, and made a terrified glare at the ponies. "Wh-what are you?"
"Eh-hm", Twilight Sparkle coughed slightly and neared before the panicked bounty hunter to introduce herself: "I'm Twilight Sparkle and this is-"
"Answer my question, dammit!", Spike snarled, grabbed her instantly, and hold her close. Rapid wild brown eyes were meeting shocked violet ones. "What the hell are you? Where am I? Why have you brought me here?"
"I...I...", Twilight Sparkle stuttered, her careful manners forgotten and feeling the tension rising in the room. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to bring him here after all.
"ANSWER ME!", he roared at her and shook her brutally.
"Hey, let go of her, you jerk!", Rainbow Dash yelled and dashed to the enraged Spike to free her friend. But Spike avoided the attack, headbutted the pegasus to the other side of the room, and threw Twilight Sparkle like a spear towards her out of instincts. The other ponies were gasping and wanted to save Twilight and Rainbow from the abuser. The bounty hunter took the chance to jump over them and sprinted down the stair. The ponies were surprised, but continued to reach their wounded friends. Pinkie Pie however stopped as something was twitching. She followed Spike who was trying to reach the door.
"WAIT!", Pinkie Pie shouted at him, causing Spike to turn to her shocked.
"Get away from me, you freaks!", he threatened and made a fighting pose.
"Look out for -!", before Pinkie Pie couldn't finish the warning, the door opened widely and smashed the thrown off bounty hunter to the sides. "-the door."
"Say, I heard screaming. Is everything alright?", the purple dragon asked concerned. Pinkie Pie pointed at something behind him. Spike turned and saw that he knocked the angel out cold. "Oh, sorry."
End of Overture of the paddock – part one -