Author: CharmGirl24 PM
You weren't supposed to fall in love in an arranged marriage. You weren't supposed to fail at being a wife. Now she couldn't even give him a child. Was there anything Hinata could do right? AU. Modern Day. Officially SasuHina. Chapter 10 has been split!Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Hinata H. & Sasuke U. - Chapters: 12 - Words: 57,723 - Reviews: 240 - Favs: 122 - Follows: 172 - Updated: 02-14-13 - Published: 05-15-11 - id: 6992602
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
Edited (11/5/12) by my new beta, DreamingCynic. Thank you for cleaning up all my mistakes, you are amazing!
Their marriage had been one of convenience, a business transaction rather than a love match. She supposed she was quite fortunate for her husband might have been far older and lacking in looks as opposed to the one she married.
Her husband had not been a total stranger, their families ran in the same social circles and they had been acquainted at a few parties. His family had wanted to ensure he'd make a proper match and that his future wife would have an exceptional pedigree to recommend her.
She had been the prime choice.
As the eldest child of Hyuuga Hiashi she had been in the direct line of succession to become the leader of the Hyuuga clan. However as fate would have it, she did not measure up to their expectations. Being a rather timid, reserved child she possessed none of the qualities befitting of a leader. As it would be Hinata had a younger sister, the spare who far exceeded her older sister and was the ideal heiress.
She lost her title, but if she could not be the heir then they would have to find another use for her. She had failed in her original purpose, but she could still prove to be of use to the clan and prove her worth by acting as a bargaining chip.
It was quite typical for wealthy families to wed off their daughters in order to form stronger ties and create alliances between other families and hers was no exception.
She knew what was expected of her and was aware of the reality of her situation. She was not one of those fortunate few who got to choose who they loved much less married.
The couple had only met on a few occasions before the actual wedding and even then they hardly spoke. His only words to her had been to carry out her duty and not screw up in addition to commenting that she should not expect any of those frivolous emotions such as love and affection from him.
Her husband wasn't exactly the warm and fuzzy type not that she had ever expected much in terms of the person she would one day marry, Hinata doubted that Sasuke even knew what love even felt like.
It seemed to Hinata that other girls when they were young usually dreamed about their wedding day, of all the plans they'd make, marrying their true love, their happily ever after. Hinata had never really entertained those thoughts, thankfully since she had no say in the least about the wedding preparations and most certainly not the groom.
Everything was chosen for her, her dress and her hairstyle, the flowers she would carry, the guests who were invited, the venue, the music, right down to the type of cake they would serve.
Even to this day she couldn't remember how she'd managed to survive that day, being the centre of attention, tying herself to a relative stranger for the rest of her life.
When she tried to recall the events of her wedding it was if watching someone else's life. She felt no real emotion or reaction toward what was going on, she had merely being going through the motions.
For as with any marriage between influential families there were certain conditions that had to be met and of course, a pre-nup was drawn up.
Apparently there were no penalties for extra-marital affairs unless it became public knowledge or they had an outside child. Essentially if they were discrete and used protection they could screw whoever they wanted or rather Sasuke was free to do so, but the wife was meant to remain faithful and pure, so she could have a lover except she'd be scorned for it. Talk about double standards.
Then there was the issue to producing an heir. If she conceived within the first five years of their marriage they would be able to divorce freely, if and only a viable heir was born. So all she had to do was get pregnant and bear his child and she'd be scot free after five years. Of course if they divorced their child would probably be taken in by the Uchiha family and she would have limited access to them. Knowing her family, the horrid bastards they'd probably marry her off again.
Married life wasn't that terrible; Sasuke was often preoccupied with work and didn't really spare her a second thought. She was left to her own devices; she was only twenty at the time and had been pursuing pre-med before she had gotten married. It wasn't usual for a trophy wife such as herself to attend school or even have a job outside of hosting parties and the like, but it had always been her dream to become a doctor and it was one she fought hard to achieve.
Luckily Sasuke didn't give a shit what she did really and he wasn't one to be bothered by social activities such as luncheons and garden parties. All she had to do was be quiet and look pretty on his arm whenever they had to attend business functions or any formal event.
Her life wasn't exactly the way she wanted it to be, but she wasn't completely unhappy, lonely yes but not unhappy.
She had her dreams and though she didn't really have much friends she got by.
They had been married for three years so far and she was in her second year of med school and almost twenty three. She was also on her third pregnancy.
Her last two had ended in miscarriages and her life was falling apart at the seams.
Her marriage or rather her business arrangement with Sasuke was hanging together by frail threads that were gradually being worn away with each failed pregnancy.
Hinata's mental state was a fragile as the worn pages of a book, the slightest of pressure and she would tear. Her miscarriages had taken an immense toil on her. She wasn't one to be unemotional and indifferent toward the life growing inside of her despite the less than savory circumstances it had been conceived under.
She had had no problems getting pregnant, it was merely the difficulty of sustaining the child for the entire nine months. According to the doctors the terrible "training sessions" she had undergone when she had been younger and still considered the Hyuuga heiress had damaged her womb making it extremely difficult, not to mention dangerous for her to bear a child.
Nonetheless Sasuke had been determined for her to have his heir and she was not blind to the fact that he had also been affected by the loss of their child. Every time something went wrong she could see the brief flash of anguish that marred his features and his shoulders that seemed to bow under the weight of his grief.
This was her last chance. If this child didn't make it this time it would probably very well claim her life. Well then her family couldn't belittle and mock her any further for her failure if she did perish and Sasuke could be free to find someone else to give him a child.
Her mindset wasn't very optimistic, a baby should be a time for joy and celebration, but after the first two time she didn't have the spirit to hold out the belief this one would make it, she never seemed to do anything right. Hinata tried not to get too attached, it was an impossible endeavour, but she had to try to keep her heart safe, it was so bruised and torn up at point.
She did her best to ensure everything went smoothly with this pregnancy, she couldn't control faith, but she wanted to take every precaution possible. So she applied for a leave of absence from school so she would be stress free, took all the pre-natal care supplements, ate all the right foods and visited the doctor religiously every two weeks in her case to ensure everything was going well and for her own peace of mind.
As she entered into her into her fifth month of pregnancy, the longest she had ever carried a child, she had found out she was having a little girl. A boy would have been preferred, but after so many miscarriages, the sex of the child hardly mattered. Hinata was determined to have her own baby, very own her little girl. For the first time in dark period that seemed to stretch into an age, she allowed herself to hope.
Against her better sense she went to a baby store the day she found out and bought a soft knit blanket and the prettiest pink baby doll dress.
She had decided she would name her Megumi. Uchiha Megumi for she had been Hinata's very own miracle, her blessing, her gift from God.
At seven months God decided he wanted back his angel.
Hinata went into labour while she had been tending to her garden. At first the pain had been subtle, small cramps, nothing too terrible but steadily they worsened until fear had gripped her heart as a powerful contraction left her dazed and panting, her body wracked with pain.
She screamed for the servants who immediately came rushing to her aid and carried her to the hospital.
Five hours later she gave birth to a four pound 7 ounce baby girl. The child was immediately placed into incubation and connected to too many tubes and machines to count. Meanwhile Hinata was fighting for her life, the premature birth and her past injuries led to her haemorrhaging uncontrollably.
There were at least two of their top doctors and several nurses all desperately trying to preserve her fading life force. All the while she begged God to spare her daughter's life.
She cried and she pleaded with him to take her life in exchange for her daughter's.
Somehow nearing 11 in the night they managed to stabilize Hinata.
At 3:35 a.m. Uchiha Megumi's lungs gave out and the rest of her organs failed right after.
Hinata had never gotten a chance to hold her daughter, she had briefly touched her brow before her child had been carried away and she had continued in the struggle for her life.
All the while her husband had been rushing home from a business meeting he had been attending almost halfway around the world.
Once he arrived Sasuke was greeted by the news of the death of his daughter and a wife who had almost lost her life as well.
Hinata had still been recovering so they had refrained from telling her the truth, though she had asked numerous times about her child, questions they evasively answered - all the while feeling guilty and saddened for the poor young woman.
Almost three days after her daughter's death, they felt her condition had improved sufficiently and they could no longer hide the truth especially since her husband had told them to go ahead.
They had tried to break it as gently as possible, tried to explain all the medical reasons why it had happened, why it could not have been avoided, and most especially that she had nothing to do with it in the least.
But none of their supposedly comforting words had any effect.
Once she had heard instead of the crying and denial and hysteria they had expected, she had gone utterly still, her face going slack before she asked for some privacy.
When Sasuke finally entered the room he found her lying on her side, curled like a comma with her arms wrapped around her trembling body. She stared unseeingly at the wall with glassy eyes filled with tears that couldn't fall.
Looking at her so broken and lifeless prompted Sasuke to do something wholly uncharacteristic.
He already knew from the doctors that she would never be able to have a child again for it would surely kill her, the baby in most cases as well.
He also knew just how much she had wanted this child even more so than himself.
And though he had never done so before he wanted to comfort her, he wanted them to share their grief together and most of all he wanted to tell her that he was sorry for putting her through this, sorry that the world was so cruel and unfair, sorry that she had lost a child not once but three times and that she would never have any of her own.
But he could not find his voice to tell her these things and he knew at this time it would hardly matter. So removing his shoes he sat on her bed before lying down and wrapping his arms around her frail body, adding his heat to her own as they reflected upon the child and the future they had just lost.
A/N: This story has been bouncing around in my head for a while and honestly I don't feel I have it in me to write a whole long fic so I'm giving a shortened version just outlining the main events.
Well I know it's pretty sad but it will get better. Due to the request from reviewers it will be a SasuHina fic with some twists lol. Also it won't be that long if I can help it but there will be more dialogue and details and such.
Anyway please tell me what you think by reviewing.