|Kiss Me Closer
Author: DD Agent PM
He left, then he came back, only to go and then stay. Jenny Shepard is confused over Leroy Jethro Gibbs and she doesn't like it. Set end of S3/beginning of S4.Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Drama - Leroy Jethro Gibbs & Jenny Shepard - Words: 1,935 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 06-06-11 - Status: Complete - id: 7057765
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Kiss Me Closer by DD Agent
I do not own NCIS or any of its characters, or its settings - all belongs to the lovely folks at CBS
He was leaving. She knew that from his body language, from the way he stared at her glass of bourbon. She had been so happy when he had woken up from the coma, even happier somewhat that he didn't remember anything. He wouldn't remember the shared heartbreak which overwrote any happier times they had had.
Jethro stood up; his face still scared and his body wearing the blue scrubs that made his eyes look paler than she had ever seen them. Jenny didn't know what to say - her mouth wouldn't work to produce the words she really needed it to. It was too late for her to say anything that meant anything.
He headed for the door, but stopped at the handle. His hand fell and he turned to her. She didn't know what he was doing until he walked the few paces back to her, a purpose clouding his face.
"Jen, can you do something for me?"
"Anything," she whispered, wetting her lips to allow the words to come out.
He smiled softly at her, finally closing the distance between them. He rested an arm around her waist, and Jenny believed he wanted a hug goodbye. Maybe it was only the good memories seeping through. She let him bring her closer, his arm strong around her body. Naturally, Jenny put her arms around his neck, anticipating putting her head next to his.
But it seemed Jethro had other ideas. When she moved her head to complete the hug, his free hand reached out to trace her cheek. He closed his eyes and leant into her, pressing his lips softly against hers. It had been too long since their last kiss, but Jenny could remember how he felt, how he tasted. It wasn't a quick kiss farewell, but a soft reconfirmation of times gone by. She felt him smile as he deepened the kiss, his mouth sliding over hers in familiar patterns. She moaned a little as she relaxed into his touch, losing herself in how wonderful it felt to be held by him again.
When the kiss ended, Jenny didn't know what to think. His hands clasped her face now, stroking the skin carefully, like he was afraid of breaking her. He was smiling, his eyes once again bright.
"Just as I thought."
Without another word, Jethro left her office and walked over the catwalk. She followed him, watched him say goodbye to his team, his friends, his family. He gave her one last look before he left NCIS, her lips still tingling from his touch.
She didn't know why she was forcing him to go, other than for both their sakes. Her words were true - she was worried about his health and his tendency to run headfirst to rescue the damsel in distress. But there was something else wanting him to go, and that was her own heart. For the few months while Jethro had been on his Margarita Safari, she had been trying to stop thinking about him every moment of every day. The feel of his lips on hers in not a moment of passion but a total moment of surrender.
And there had been no mention of it, apart from a smart remark thrown out when he had first walked into her office. She had smiled, but she wanted him to be serious. She didn't have the luxury of sleeping with her colleagues, or worse - falling in love with them. She had spent the summer trying out Todd, the Doctor she had met when Jethro had been in hospital. He had been sweet, pleasant, but when they had kissed she hadn't felt the electricity run through her like the memory of that single kiss in her office did.
She turned around, her bag swinging from her hand. He still looked rough around the edges, his clothing loose and she tried to resist ideas about how easy they would be to remove. He walked the handful of steps up to her and pushed onwards until her knees bumped against the work bench. She leaned back, making sure she wasn't sitting on nails or mason jars of bourbon.
Jethro continued walking till their knees bumped. Like a repeat of her office, his hand reached up to caress her cheek. She tried to stop her heart beating, chastised herself for giving in to old feelings that couldn't resurface. Because she saw in his eyes a man who still wasn't ready to give it all up and head to a Cantina. He would be coming back to NCIS, and the fact that she disapproved added one more reason to come back, to continue their little game of trying to push the other into old habits, their old dynamics.
"Your eyes got cold, Jenny."
The tear slipped down despite her minds objections to the display of unwanted want. She supposed that in trying to repress everything she had once again put her heart back in its box.
Her skin shivered as he used his thumb to wipe the tear away. It then moved to her lips, where she tasted the salty tang of her own tears and the burn of spilt bourbon over his fingers. Her mouth opened and his thumb rested on the inside of her lip, his eyes trying to comprehend the situation in front of them both.
"I better go," she whispered, not sure what she had left to say other than the press of her lips against his. But it wasn't the time, they were on the pinnacle of their relationship returning to the way it was and that was best for both of them. At least best for her.
She knew he watched her walk away, and she hoped he had the same look that she had had on her face the day he had left NCIS. Her lips trembled from his touch again, but this time a smile overcame her face as her security detail took her home. She would be seeing him in the morning and despite everything, that was a sight she missed seeing.
"Now is not Paris."
She knew she shouldn't have brought it up. But she wanted to know, know everything about Shannon and Kelly, the part of his life that he had cut off from her. She had thought about what life could have been like if they had been truly honest with each other on all counts, and her head kept going around in dizzying circles.
She thought constantly about their kiss and the movement of his fingers across her mouth. She had once woken up to the words "just as I thought" ringing in her head. Gibbs was driving her crazy, and the craziness was beginning to tire her out. She was already playing games with one man, and she couldn't stand to do it with another.
"Your priorities were clear in Paris."
Low blow, and it still stung. "I had a job to do in Paris." It didn't involve making love to him every night, didn't involve the many notepads she had gone through trying to choose between him and the job, or the one notepad when she had tried to think about how they could co-exist together. Her job meant everything, in the end it was all she had left.
"If I had told you about my first wife, would it have made a difference?"
"We'll never know, will we?"
Her words made him storm out of the office, slamming the door behind him. She kicked herself mentally and tried to get a grip of her feelings. Every encounter confused her more, made her believe that things had changed but they always stayed the same. Paris would not come again, and neither one of them would ever concede and admit their feelings, even if he had them.
"Yes Cynthia?" Back to work. Best place for her heart to be.
"Director. Agent Gibbs is still here."
There was a curse from the other side of the door, and Jethro came back through it, closing it silently behind him. Cynthia would be in his bad books for some time, but Jenny knew she would consider it worth it to see the great Leroy Jethro Gibbs look a little on edge.
She went to say something but Gibbs stormed over to her, their conversation still not finished. "I'm not going to apologise and don't you dare either. I taught you better."
"Yes you did. But not all your lessons are good ones. Rule twelve?"
He was silent. She closed her eyes and ran her hands over her face for a moment, not quite believing that he had come back. He never came back - he always walked away. She opened them when she felt something brush against the curve of her neck. She found Jethro's mouth linger over her skin. His hands reached for her, and when his eyes turned to hers, she could see the calm in them.
"I never thought I'd meet someone who was worth the trouble to break it."
Jenny smirked, and he stroked the corners of her smile. "So, am I worth the trouble?"
He looked like the man she had fallen in love with in Paris, like the man who she had come back to NCIS to see. He smiled, he flirted, he wanted her. Jethro smiled at her, stroking strands of hair behind her ear. He leant into kiss her, no surprises this time as she felt his mouth graze over hers. But she didn't want moments of teasing anymore, she didn't want games. She wanted to feel his embrace, confirming how they really felt.
She gripped the back of his neck and forced his mouth harder on hers. His lips moved in a frenzy, rediscovering sweet spots of her body that he could reach with his hands. When they broke their kiss, Jenny found herself bent over her desk, Jethro's smiling face gazing over her.
"Just as I thought," he whispered.
Jenny continued to look confused, wondering if he was going to explain himself this time. "Thought what?"
He smiled, and moved over to join her by her desk, his hand still holding hers. They watched his thumb dance over her skin, the tremors caused by the simple touch running through both of them.
"The first time I saw you after the explosion, I woke up and I felt this rush of emotion that I couldn't describe. As I started to wake up, I kept feeling more and more every time I thought about you. When I kissed you - it made me realise that Paris never ended, at least not for me."
Her hand broke from his and ran up his jacket, reaching down to stroke his pulse point. "And now?"
"Didn't end for you either."
Sitting side by side, Jenny reached over and kissed Jethro, clasping his face in her hands. As they broke apart, neither could stop smiling. It reminded Jenny of their first kiss in London, the first time she had really let herself feel for him. The real beginning of everything.
Ignoring his team grilling Cynthia a few metres away from the door, Jethro moved to hold her hand again. The world and the job could wait for just one more kiss.