He was the leader of the most powerful empire in the world. His
empire spread over almost every scrap of land throughout the entire map. He
had furnished wonders of the worlds from the pyramids to Marco Polo's
embassy, conquered the Chinese, Americans, and Romans. He had discovered
the Alphabet, Masonry and even Gunpowder. He had so much money he didn't
know what to do with it. He was Emperor Nerdo of the mighty Squeaky Empire,
and he was bored.
He called a meeting of the high council. They stood in front of him
in his cave that passed for a throne room, waiting patiently. They all wore
white togas and smiled at him. He sighed and pointed to the first man, a
fat, bald guy with a bloodstained sword and a maniacal glint in his eye.
"Report," the Emperor said importantly.
"All is well, noble leader, and that pleaseth me mightily! HAHAHAH
AHA HA HAAA HAAAA!!!" He threw his head back and broke out into peals of
"Good," said the important leader lazily. "Next."
A thin, wild-haired man wielding a bone abacus and shaking with
excitement crawled forward. "Excellency, we are the most enlightened empire
in the world! I salute you!" He did, shakily and grinning ear to ear.
"Fine," the Emperor said. He pointed to a suave looking man with a
confidently smug smile. He pointed at him and sighed again.
"The empire runs well, Excellency," he said in a businesslike manner
that hinted he wanted your money. "Though additional taxes would hurt no
one." He added hopefully.
The science and luxuries advisors glared at him with pure hatred.
"The gods adore you noble leader, and distant lands favor our mighty
"I concur, you Excellency," piped in the science advisor.
"Sounds good. Next."
"No complaints. noble leader," said the luxuries advisor.
"Great. Foreign lands happy, war going good, trade flourishing, yadda
yadda yadda." Grumbled the king. "But something's missing, or something. I
can't put my finger on it.
"Perhaps not enough money, sire?" asked the trade advisor with
"No, no, plenty of that."
"Perhaps not enough science?"
"No, we've got enough going funding towards finding the cure to
pimples. I think they're calling it Theology. Perhaps it is time, yes,
maybe I will."
"What is it, sire?" asked the foreign minister.
"Yes. might as well. nothing else to do. Then it's final!" The
emperor jumped out of the throne. "Follow me, ladies and gentlemen, I've
He ran through palace, going left and right and through a maze of
wide corridors finally stopping right in front of the war council room, two
doors down from the room they had just been in.
"Now, I've always been tempted to use this, but I haven't, but now I
shall. Gather round, everyone and look!"
Under a secret compartment under the table he brought out a small
square metallic plate, onto which was inscribed a single world.
"The cheat button? Are you sure you want to use this?"
"It. it will go into your high score!"
"You'll regret it!"
"Perhaps. Perhaps I shall, oh my brainless followers, but I will
chance it. Things are going to be a whole lot different around here."
"But wait, maybe you should consider." started the trade advisor.
The emperor was beyond reason. His eyes lit up with what was either
greed, pleasure, insanity, or some combination of all three. He reached out
and with a trembling hand pushed the cheat button.