|Finn & Kurt
Author: GirlInTheMirror121 PM
Basically, a spoof of the semi-old Nickelodeon show "Drake & Josh". Finn and Kurt's adventures as stepbrothers. Crackfic/spoof/parody. Let me know if you want me to continue this; otherwise, it's complete.Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor/Friendship - Kurt H. & Finn H. - Words: 1,074 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 12 - Published: 07-19-11 - Status: Complete - id: 7197101
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or anything that is a concept of Nickelodeon.
Note: I don't even know. Basically, I was watching an old episode of Drake & Josh the other day and it reminded me of the relationship between Finn and Kurt. You can guess who is who. Crackfic/parody/spoof. I will continue if you want.
"And the Tony Award for Best Actor in a Musical goes to…Kurt Hummel!" Kurt stood up and pretended to cry. "Oh, no, you shouldn't have," he faux-composed himself. "I'd like to thank the little people who helped me get here…my agent…my friends and family…my wonderful boyfriend, Blaine, I love you, baby…it means so much to win this award at the young age of twenty…" he pretended to sniffle some more. The door to his room flew open.
"Dude, what are you doing?" Finn demanded, looking at Kurt standing in front of his collection of action figures and various cardboard cutouts holding Finn's old baseball trophy.
"Um…accepting my Tony?" Kurt looked embarrassed.
"Yeah, sure, whatever. Look…are those my X-Men figurines?"
"Yes," Kurt picked one up. "I kind of like this one. The claws are very GaGa."
"…that would be Wolverine," Finn took it from Kurt.
"Right. Anyway, so I hear that Dad and Carole are going on a date tonight. You know what that means!"
"Yeah, dude, party," Finn smirked.
Kurt rolled his eyes. "No! It means movie night!"
"Party, party, party," Finn chanted, flopping on his bed and picking up his guitar.
"But…The Notebook is on tonight!" Kurt pouted.
"Aw man, that's a chick flick. If you wanna watch that with Blaine, cool, whatever, but I'm not watching it with you."
"Fine," Kurt sulked towards the phone. "I'll call Blaine and see if he wants to come over tonight and watch it with me. Date night. Which is more than you can say…"
"I'm between girls, okay?" Finn tuned his guitar.
"You dumped Quinn, and Rachel doesn't want you," Kurt reminded him.
"Oh shut up and call your boyfriend," Finn threw a pillow at his stepbrother.
"Finn, what do you want for dinner?" Kurt called, puttering around in the kitchen.
"I dunno. I think I'm just gonna make something later for myself, okay? The boys and I are going out for some shenanigans."
"Shenanigans?" Kurt raised his carefully tended eyebrows. "The boys?"
"Yeah. Me, Puck, Mike, and Sam. Oh, and Artie, him, too."
"…and is there a perk for me in all of this?"
"You get the house to yourself…and Blaine," Finn pointed out.
"Fine, fine. I'll just make him a nice, romantic dinner then. Hand me the saffron, please." Finn gave him a blank stare. "Oh, I'll get it myself," Kurt huffed and reached for it on the spice rack.
"Mmm…Blaine," Kurt moaned softly.
Kurt jumped back from where he was tangled up in his boyfriend. "FINN!" He straightened his shirt. "What are you doing?"
"Watching you play tonsil hockey with Blaine," Finn remarked. "So I think I'm just gonna sit here on the couch with you two while waiting for my mac 'n' cheese to cook." He squished himself between the two boys. "Yep, that's more like it."
"Oh my God," Kurt buried his face in his hands.
Blaine looked amused. "Nice to see you, too, Finn."
"Yeah, whatever," Finn yawned.
Kurt sniffed the air. "Is something burning?" He leapt off the couch and ran towards the kitchen. "Finn!" He stopped the microwave and opened the door, smoke pouring out.
"Oh, I guess I set the microwave a little too long," Finn said.
"You're supposed to pull the film back to vent it," Kurt groaned, grabbing the oven mitts and taking the smoking macaroni dish out of the microwave.
"Oh," Finn looked sheepish. "Well, guess I'll grab a bite to eat with the boys, then," he grabbed his coat and started to leave. "Oh, and you two use protection!" he yelled in the general vicinity of the living room before going out the door with a stifled laugh.
Kurt's face turned bright red. "I'm so sorry about that," he apologized to Blaine. He quickly threw the burnt cheesy pasta away before sitting back down on the couch. "So…where were we?"
"Kurt!" Finn pounced on Kurt's bed.
"It's two in the morning," Kurt groaned. "Go back to your own bed. If you want to snuggle, go snuggle with Mr. Teddy."
"Mr. Teddy is not for snuggling," Finn scoffed. "And I didn't want to snuggle."
"Well then, go back to bed," Kurt said, muffled by his pillow. "Need my beauty sleep."
"But I want pizza," Finn whined.
"There's some in the freezer," Kurt swung an arm out in an attempt to smack Finn.
"Yeah but Mom said I can't cook now 'cause of what I did last night," Finn explained. "And I don't want to cook a pizza. It's two a.m."
"My point exactly," Kurt said through gritted teeth. "Go to sleep."
"You can drive. You have a car," Finn put his face next to Kurt's. "And you're my wonderful, amazing, awesome, cool brother."
"Don't suck up to me. Go to bed."
"Pleeeeeasssssse?" Finn begged.
"You want me to drive…you…to get pizza…at two in the morning?"
"Pretty much, yeah."
"What's in it for me?"
"I won't tell Mom and Dad that I found that condom in your bed the other day."
Kurt sat bolt upright. "Pizza it is," he shuffled to get his shoes on.
Finn smirked, glad he'd gotten his way. It wasn't easy having Kurt Hummel as his stepbrother. But what was the fun in having a brother if you couldn't blackmail him from time to time?
Kurt rolled his eyes. He couldn't believe he was about to drive at two in the morning just to get pizza for his always-hungry stepbrother. Living with Finn Hudson was a downright pain in the ass. Then again, it was better than being an only child. Living with Finn meant never-ending adventures…whether Kurt wanted to go on them or not.
Do you want me to continue? Also, yes, before you ask, they do share a room. Review this, fans!