Author: Detective88 PM
Sora becomes the sherrif of a runtown town called Dirt where he'll find out the secret to the water supply. Will he save the day or not?Rated: Fiction T - English - Western/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,726 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 06-23-12 - Published: 07-25-11 - id: 7218093
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Here is the first chapter of my "Rango" parody. I am so sorry this took so long, but please forgive me anyways. Read and review.
Chapter 1: Setting the Stage
Detective88 Stories Presents
A Detective88 Production
We see a dark screen until spotlights turned on and some rocks shone on them. The rocks turned around to reveal the title of the parody that the authoress is typing. Then we hear singing and there were figures going to the stage.
Singers: Sorango, Sorango
The spotlight shone on the figures revealing themselves. The first was a humanoid orange squirrel with a tuff of blonde hair on his head, white fur on his tummy and part of tail, buck teeth with a gold tooth on the left, white gloves and he was holding a trumpet; he's Screwy Squirrel.
The second was a humanoid woodpecker with red feathers on the top of his head, white on his tummy and blue feathers on his body, a yellow beak and feet, white gloves and he was carrying a violin; he's Woody Woodpecker.
The third, fourth and fifth were three dog like creatures(two boys and one girl) with red noses, white faces and black fur. The first had brown pants and was carrying a guitar. His name was Yakko. The second wore a blue shirt and a red cap and he was carrying a accordian. His name was Wakko. The third was had a flower in her ears and a pink skirt and she was carrying a claranet. Her name was Princess Angelena Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Bobesca the Third or Dot for short. Call her Dotty and you die.
The last was a 10 year old boy with a big nose, beady eyes, red hair, a red baseball cap, a white/blue shortsleeve shirt, blue pants and sneakers and he was carrying a harmonica; he was Billy. Together this band was called "The Screwballs."
A bullet hit the "O" in the title, making Dot duck and cringe.
Screwballs: Sorango, Sorango
After they sang, the title turned back around and the spotlight just shown on the mariachi band members.
"We are gathered here today to immortalize in song the life and untimely death of a great legend." Yakko said to the audience. "So sit back, relax and enjoy your low calorie popcorn and assorted consessions while reading this on your computer and we tell you the strange and bewildering tale of a hero who has yet to answer his own story."
"So grab a box of tissues if you cry." Billy said.
"And throw out your trash into the recyclables and whatnot." Screwy added before the scene turns to black.
The scene then switches to someone who is meditating. He was a 15 year old boy with spiky brown hair, blue eyes, a blue shortsleeve shirt,a black vest, fingerless Keyblade gloves, red sweatpants and yellow Mickey Mouse like shoee. Since he hasn't gotten his name yet, we're gonna call him "The Stranger" until later on.
He was meditating until he got an idea for his acting scene. He finished meditating by saying, "Crunchy creamy, candy cookie, cupcake."
He grabbed some tree leaves and uses them like curtains and he says, "The stage is set. The night moist with apprehension." The Stranger narrated dramatically, taking the leaves out of the way, "Alone in her chamber, the princess prepares to take her own life."
He moves the leaves to reveal a Barbie doll with no right arm, waist in the sand.
"It is far better to nourish chocolate than to live without love." the boy impersonated the woman as he pushed a glass of water to her arm.
"She reaches for the poisoned chalice..."The Stranger continued, "Meanwhile, the wicked Malvolio plots his ascension to the throne!"
We then turn to a water setting where a orange clownfish with a nervous expression was seen swimming underwater. The boy made evil laughter. "While her aging father lies gravely ill."
We then see a dead cockroach in the pool of water.
"Yes, I'm gravely ill." said the Stranger, impersonating the 'princess's father'.
Then, daring music came on as the boy said, "Who goes there!" The Stranger jumped out from behind the palm tree with his vest like a cape and carrying an olive toothpick like a sword. "Tis I, the most aniticipated hero returning to rescue his emotionally unstable maiden!" He posed as if he was ready to fight the enemy, "Unhand her, you jailers of virtues, or taste the bitter sting of my vengeance!"
"The sting of my..." the Stranger repeated, but trailed off as pointed his sword at the dead grasshopper.
"Molt?" The Stranger said. "Molt, I'm not getting anything from you." He groaned in annoyance as he put his vest back on. "People, we've talked abou this. Acting is reacting." He turned to the palm tree, "George, you were wooden! There, I said it." he pointed to the toy fish. "Marlin? You were good."
The toy fish, by the name of Marlin just swam.
"Perhaps a little too good." said the Stranger. He turned back to the tree and said, "What's that, George? My character's undefined? That's absurd. I know who I am. I'm-I'm the guy, the protagonist, the hero. Every story needs a hero. I mean, who else is better qualified to bask in the adulation of his numerous companions?"
There was still a moment of silence. The Stranger was shocked. What was he? Why is he in this type of situation and most important. Who is he? The boy went to the other side, breathed the glass and made a square out of it.
"The stage is waiting." he said as the background starts to move around him and change. "The audience thirsts for adventure. Who am I? I could be anyone."
The Stranger smiled as the background changed into a sea sailing scene.
"I could be the sea captain, returning from a mighty voyage to reclaim his mechanical arm." the Stranger said in a pirate accent, making salute. His arm then bent back and started hitting him on the head over and over again.
"Or I could be the rouge anthropologist, battling pythons down in the Congo!" The Stranger continued in a British accent as he wrestled with a rope which started to move like a snake and it started to strangle him. "Down, Chongo down."
The Stranger then appears again as romantic disco music turns on and he waves his vest around saying in a Spanish accent, "If you desire romance, I will be the greatest lover ever known. He took his shirt off and a tiny chest hair popped up.(A/N: Scream all you want fangirls, but he's Kairi's boy).
The Stranger took out a guitar and played it. "Hola." he went to the doll, smoothed back his hair and sat down next to it. " I couldn't help but notice you noticing me noticing you." He took the dust speck off of its neck and flicked it away. "You know, the womens find me uncomfortably good looking, but you seem remarkably at ease."
He made the doll put an arm on his leg. He pushed it away saying, "Stop it." He did it again. "No, really." He put the doll's arm on his leg again. "Well if you must. What are you doing?" He continued on, laughing for a bit.
"Are those real?" he asked the doll, pointing at its...chest.
The doll slapped him in the face. However instead of screaming in pain, the Stranger had remembered and said in his normal voice, "That's it! Conflict!" He turned to the palm tree. "George, you were right! I have been undefined."
He took the glass of water and said, "People, I've had an emihany. The hero cannot exist in a vacuum! What our story needs is an ironic, unexpected event that will propel the hero into conflict!"
Just then a car horn sounds off as the Stranger turns and hears. The camera zooms back to reveal that he's in a pet cage own by giants who were driving a car minding their own buisness until a green light flashes with them. Just then, they swerved over and over until in brief slow motion, the cage the Stranger was in fell out of the car, making him land onto "the sky."
The glass broke and it slid all across the road until he slid close to the doll's arms. Luckily he wasn't hurt.
There was a moment of silence. For our story begins on the road with the hero in the sort of conflict he just got himself into.
End of Chapter 1
The next chapter is where Sor-I mean, The Stranger, gets some help from Rafiki in order to get to ther other side where he is chased by a dragon. Read and Review.
Here is the chapter where Sora meets Rafiki and then heads to the other side of the desert where he goes to find shelter for the night after a crazy crazy dragon chase.