Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing or its characters.

Abraham hummed to himself as he flipped through several files he carried, making note of new missions that should be scheduled, and information retrieval units that should be deployed. He strode briskly toward his office, having just briefed a new squad of units. The human paused, feeling an oddness of the shadows around him. He smiled, shaking his head as he continued toward his office.

"Have you nothing better to do but stalk me, vampire?" Abraham called over his shoulder as a mass of shadow moved oddly.

Alucard stepped from the shadows, a smirk rising up the side of his face.
"Since the vermin of the streets have decided to hide away in their holes, no."

Abraham chuckled, stopping at the doorway to his office and shifted the files in his hands as he fumbled through his pockets for his keys.

"There may be a mission for you soon, but so far everything has been too weak. It would be overkill to send you out. And a bit taxing, as for the past several missions you have proven untrustworthy and more costly than human units."

He slid the ancient key into the lock, turning it until he heard the loud click. Abraham backed up a step to swing the door open and felt his back collide with the cloth covered wall of granite that was his servant's chest.

"Alucard, your pestering is beginning to tax my nerves," Abraham sighed, turning to place a finger against the black cloth of the vampire's suit and push him back slightly. "I'm not in the mood to deal with your childish antics tonight."

Alucard allowed the old man to move him, though his smile grew with each step back he took. He was feeling playful, and perhaps a little suicidal since he had chosen his master to pester. If Abraham wanted to lock him in the manor, without even being able to lean out a window or perch on the roof, then Abraham had better be prepared to deal with a bored vampire.

Abraham narrowed his eyes, turning and opening the door to his office, and made a point of shutting it in Alucard's face, hoping to deter the creature from continuing with his behavior. This action didn't even slow the vampire, as he phased straight through the wood with little cares.

Abraham sighed as he heard the vampire's chuckling follow him across the room. He whirled around to confront the creature, only to find nothing but an empty room and a closed door. His irritation growing, Abraham whirled back toward his desk, eyes narrowing upon the vampire perched lazily in his master's leather chair. Abraham choked at the beast's audacity as Alucard perched his feet upon Abraham's desk, mushing up several stacks of paper.

"You're getting brave," Abraham stated, his voice darkening as he approached his desk slowly.

Alucard only grinned at him, tilting his head back. His eyes shone brightly. He was baiting Abraham, and they both knew it. Abraham did not enjoy being toyed with in the least. He strode forward, reaching the vampire and pushing his feet from his desk, sending papers scattering to the floor.

With a sound of irritation, Abraham tossed his files upon the now messy desk. Alucard watched his master's frustration build, his face splitting into a grin. Abraham did not enjoy seeing his servant's mirth at his own expense. The human leaned over Alucard's grinning form, reaching out to grab a handful of the creature's hair, pulling his head back.

"Do you really want to challenge me, servant?" he hissed in the vampire's face.

Alucard's answer was a throaty chuckle. "You are as bored as I," Alucard commented, eyelids falling half mast as his eyes darkened, smoldering. "You never did follow through with your threat of your lovely riding crop."

Disgusted, Abraham scoffed. He kept his grip upon Alucard's hair and pulled him from the chair. Alucard offered no resistance, sliding from the creaking leather as he was forced face first to the floor by Abraham's strong arm. He could have fought back, but where was the fun in that?

Placing a foot between the vampire's shoulder blades as he released his grip upon Alucard's hair, Abraham rested upon his knee, forcing his weight onto the vampire's back. He leaned over to the vampire's ear, a deadly smirk running up his face.

"Do not tempt me, Alucard. You won't like me right now."

Alucard smirked as his cheek was pressed into the stone floor. A demonic glint in his eye flashed when he met Abraham's.

"Promise?"

Sighing, Abraham straightened and returned to his desk, leaving the vampire lying upon the floor, immersed in his own mirth. Once Abraham had retrieved his fallen paperwork and settled himself at his desk, he considered the matter over. Unfortunately, the vampire did not share the feeling.

Abraham leaned over his desk, his ignoring of the vampire evolved to complete forgetting once he immersed himself into the files. A strange tugging at his foot brought him back to reality, and he shoved himself back from the papers, and looked under his desk.

Alucard had managed to crawl unheard across the floor, under his master's desk, and now held a loose shoelace between jagged teeth. He looked almost like a puppy, unlacing his shoes with his teeth. Abraham's grip tightened on the worn wood of the edge of his desk, not in anger, but in forced control.

The vampire gazed up at his master, his eyes glowing brightly with indescribable lust.

"What in God's name are you doing?" Abraham growled deeply.

"My Master," Alucard purred, dropping the now loose lace and working Abraham's shoe from his foot. "Trust me. This has nothing to do with God."

A knock at the door distracted Abraham for the moment, and he had no choice, unless he wanted to explain why his vampire was under his desk pawing at him, but to carry on as if nothing…odd was happening.

Alucard was going to be quite sorry once his guest left.

"Enter," Abraham called, clasping his hands in front of him as he felt Alucard's cool fingers tugging the sock from his shoeless foot. Abraham kicked out, hoping to strike the creature with no such luck. Alucard's hand around his ankle was like an iron manacle.

He could mentally order the vampire away, or even use the seal to persuade him to leave with sharp stabs of pain. But Abraham felt the odd air coming from Alucard, and was himself curious of what was happening. He had to wonder if vampires went into heat. But then again, Alucard was always odd. Maybe he was looking for rough sex in the only place he knew he would find it.

Abraham's head general entered the office, saluting as he approached the desk. "I have tonight's mission report, Sir," the man stated as he set a file before Abraham.

Having no other choice at the moment, Abraham opened the file, and crossed his legs. He was sure he heard a distinct huff of irritation from under the desk, but the other man didn't seem to have heard, or suspected anything as he waited for Abraham to review the file.

Alucard nuzzled at his master's foot for several moments, kissing and licking his way over the surface. Slowly, he began nuzzling his way up his master's leg until Abraham crossed his legs. With a hiss of frustration, the vampire nipped at the man's leg, earning a sharp kick into his chest. This did not deter him though, and he nuzzled his way over Abraham's outer thigh, sighing cool breaths over his flesh in hopes to get his legs uncrossed.

Finally, Alucard managed to pry his master's legs apart and quickly moved to rest his chin on the space of leather chair between Abraham's thighs. He could hear the two men conversing about a meaningless mission, and grinned, wanting to test his master's self control.

Abraham's eyes widened, then snapped shut as he felt the cool breaths of his servant breathing against his inner thigh. He slowly opened his eyes, blinking as he met the confused gaze of his general.

"Something wrong, Sir?" the man asked.

"Not at all, I have so much to attend to today, and I just remembered something else I needed to do." Abraham grunted when Alucard began working open the buttons of his trousers with needle teeth. If the creature slipped, he swore to personally pull every tooth from its mouth.

Alucard didn't slip, however, and delicately worked his master's pants open. Softly, he purred another cool breath over the now exposed heat of flesh. This would be most enjoyable. His master put at such a disadvantage. He couldn't have planned it better if he had tried. The pain after this little scene would be most exquisite. And Alucard was quite sure there would be plenty of pain.

Abraham winced, shifting in his chair as Alucard began a calculated measure of actions. His frustration was obvious, and put his general a bit ill at ease.

"Perhaps, Sir, I should return later to finish the report?"

Abraham winced, clenching his jaw muscles as he tried to close his legs, but the bulk of undead flesh squirming and teasing him prevented that action.

"I believe that would be best. The only main issue was that no men…were lost," Abraham clenched his teeth again, shifting as best he could, but Alucard wouldn't relent. If anything, Abraham's discomfort fed the creature's actions and he intensified his efforts.

The man snapped his heels and saluted. Turning sharply, he strode from the room. Once in the hall he shook his head. The commander was acting very strange.

Once they were alone, Abraham planted his feet firmly upon the floor, and stood up so fast his chair nearly toppled to the ground. Catching a handful of his servant's hair, he plunged down the beast's throat and let out a soft moan.

"You are going to pay dearly for that," he hissed, shoving the vampire to the floor away from him.

"Promise?" Alucard asked again, the lustful glow burning brightly in his eyes.

In an instant, the vampire shed his clothing into shadow, and Abraham was upon him, hauling him to his feet. The man swept an arm over his desk, sending carefully stacked files fluttering to the floor. It would take hours to sort out the mess of papers, but Abraham's mind was somewhere else entirely.

"Scream for me, Alucard," he growled in the vampire's ear, throwing him over the desk. "Purr for me."