Author: AzureKnight2008 PM
The only difference is that there is nobody here beside me. The chilly wind blows harder, bringing with it memories of a love that I never know. If only...Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Words: 3,562 - Reviews: 9 - Published: 09-09-11 - Status: Complete - id: 7369211
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
AzureKnight2008's Foreword: Okay, everyone. So this is an old KDZ fic, say... being written almost TEN years ago  by an Asian KDZ fan. I've asked her for permission to re-post her work in Kishin Douji Zenki category, where it should have initially belonged. In addition, I offered to do this revamped version for her since her original work existed some problems concerning Japanese words / phrases that made it a little hard for readers to understand and appreciate. All I did were to make the dialogues flow smoothly by translating the whole Japanese stuff, then correct some minor errors, etc. Hopefully, all of you would find some enjoyment... during your reading. ;)
Well... NOPE! This fic belongs to its respective owner by the penname of Ryuuen Kurai ("About Ten Yens"? O_o) :lolz:
You can read her original work here, btw:
STANDARD DISCLAIMERS apply. No copyright infringement is intended by the author in writing this fanfiction.
This is a fic I wrote more out of nostalgia and boredom and frustration over Goki/Akira being underrated and Chiaki being paired up with Zenki. Zenki was aired here in the Philippines when I was like, in the Fourth Grade, or so… Oh, only five or six years ago. I accidentally stumbled upon this site featuring the series and thought of writing a fic. Basically ChiakixGoki so if you don't like the pairing, you are warned. This is my first time writing a fic for a series that doesn't have its own category so I don't expect much feedback for this one. But, hey, for old times' sake, why not? Inspired by one of the best tracks in the Kishin Douji Zenki Character Song Collection, this is a fic on confusion, regret, what may have been and what will be… Please read and review...
by Ryuuen Kurai
The moon is watching over all.
The stars are twinkling.
Even breathing from the far reaches of space...
I can hear you. It's true.
The fighting has ended.
You cast your eyes down upon the earth...
And see that all the hurt has stained it.
It's night, ah...
Does heaven unfold...
In time... You'll embrace love.
In time... Hatred will be swept away.
Now... You cared about losing.
You bring your heart with you and give it.
I wonder where the enemy is.
I wonder if he's standing next to you.
It's strange. The fighting begins,
And I am here again.
At night, oh...
Do you go and vanish?
Folding your wings.
If you are still alive today,
If you keep going today,
Again... Below you...
Let the earth sleep silently.
[from Senshi-tachi no Tsubasa (Wings of the Warriors)]
Twilight. Dusk. Sunset. Whatever one calls that fleeting moment between light and dark, it becomes all the more beautiful for its allure. I slowly walk down the familiar path to the Enno Shrine… that sacred place with which I seem to have this bond… that special place where I was born…where I grew up… where I once lived… where I once loved… where I once lost…
I sigh, hefting my duffel bag over my right shoulder as I start up the long and winding flight of stairs towards that deserted place of worship. Or, so I was told. It is sad how much things change… how much things and places once greatly revered slowly fade away with time… I almost feared reaching the top. Almost…
It is slowly getting cold, a chilly autumn wind is rustling through the treetops as though bringing with it long-forgotten memories. Dark clouds loom in the distance, eventually overshadowing the silvery glow of the moon. I hasten my steps, not wanting to be caught in the upcoming drizzle. Getting drenched by the rain isn't part of my agenda.
I reach the top of the stairs in time before the first raindrop falls and I rush headlong into the shrine not even bothering to stop and give it a look-over. I think it would have been for the best. Fumbling for a moment, I flick on the light switch. Nothing happens. I sigh. Of course. We had the electricity cut off when we moved. Racking my memory for some sort of map of this place, I feel my way towards the main worship room, remembering that that was where the ceremonial fire usually burned. Reaching the place with only minor hindrances, I am surprised to find the place alight with warmth from the flickering flame in the hearth that shouldn't have been there. Not bothering to ponder on the matter longer, too thankful not to mind, I grab a few blankets from my bag and snuggle close to it facing the entrance overlooking that ancient shrine where five years ago I discovered something that changed my life entirely… the Demon God Zenki…
Somehow, after that time, everything that happened was because of him… the dangers I've faced, the changes I've undergone, the sacrifices I've been forced to make, the people I've met… My life centered on him… and I loved him, more than a master does her servant, if she ever does… that is, I thought I loved him… which was a mistake… too late did I realize that… for that was when he left…
When I first met Akira Gotou with his mentor Kazue, there was only one way to describe him… a wuss. I mean, with the lithe frame, the all-too-girlish looks which made me believe he was a girl for some time, and the way he seemed to be hiding behind Kazue all the time… Little did I know that in him flowed the blood of Zenki's faithful comrade… the God of Light, Goki. It was really a surprise to find how much different those two were, brothers though they may be. In as much as Zenki was fierce and violent, Goki had this certain calculating side to him, never seeming to go into battle without a plan. He had better manners in contrast to Zenki's sloppiness and he acknowledged me as his master willingly, which is more than I can say for Zenki. They were as different as day and night, which, I guess, was the way it was supposed to be. After all, Goki had some sort of human nature that Zenki never had. A human nature that was more predominant than his demon side at times… A human nature that permitted him to feel what, as a demon god, he should have been immune to… something I wished I had never learned to do as well…
It was on the night of the final battle. Everyone had been too exhausted and went straight to bed… that is, everyone but Goki and I. Not that I didn't try. I retired to my bed, same as the rest, but for some reason, I couldn't sleep. After almost an hour of tossing and turning, I finally gave up and decided to get a drink. On my way back, I noticed that the ceremonial fire was still burning in the main worship room. Drawing my thin robe closer, I set off to put it out just for caution. I was surprised to find someone else in there… Goki… I wondered why he hadn't reverted back to being Akira… He was clearly submerged in thought. I walked over slowly and he glanced up, sensing my presence.
"Master," He began, quite startled. "What are you doing here? I assumed you had gone to bed with the rest."
I nodded. "Yes, but I couldn't sleep."
He smiled. "Neither could I."
I smiled back. "I figured out as much. However, why are you still in your true form? Wouldn't it be easier for you to rest as a human?"
"It just feels right to be as I am tonight while there is still time…"
I blinked at him.
"Forgive me, Master…"
"Nani? For what?"
"For not being of more help than I should have been."
I blinked once again. That was strange. "Goki, why are you telling me this?"
He smiled again, though this time, a hint of sorrow could be detected in his voice as he spoke. "The battle is over, ne?"
"That means there would be no more reason to keep me and Zenki here…"
"What?!" So this was what it was all about. "No. I wouldn't want to do that." /Would I?/ "What if something happens and you're not… what if… I couldn't… even if I could, I wouldn't… because… because…" I broke down crying, the thought of losing a very good friend and the one I loved too much to bear. Just then his arms encircled me, pulling me into a reassuring embrace. I was shocked.
"It'll be alright, Master. Please don't cry. It'd be all for the best…"
I wanted to shout at him, tell him that he had no right to say that. At least he wouldn't be losing anything. After all, he did what he did just because it was his duty… nothing more, nothing less… /And isn't that the same reason why Zenki did his part?/ No, it isn't. It couldn't be... or could it?
"Zenki gets restless after a while, you know."
I looked up at him. "But I could control him, right?"
He looked away. "Pardon me, Master, but even our former master had difficulty dealing with him. That was the reason why he was sealed away."
"Oh…" Curiosity set in. "But what about you, Goki? Why were you sealed away?"
Disconcertingly, his eyes met mine this time. "I chose to… I had lost my reason to do otherwise…"
He sighed. "After Zenki was sealed in and Master Ozunu foresaw no major threat, he allowed me some liberties. I met this young shrine maiden in a neighboring town and fell in love with her. With my former master's permission, we got married and she bore me a child. Months later, an epidemic spread and my wife contracted it. Hesitantly, I returned to Master Ozunu with my son in the hope of finding a cure. I never did. My wife died and…"
"You chose to be sealed away because you couldn't bear the pain of living without her…"
He nodded. "And I am afraid things would have to repeat themselves this time around."
"What? Goki, what do you- "
I was silenced as his lips brushed against mine in the softest of kisses before he released me.
"Forgive me, Master. I know I shouldn't have but..., I just have to let you know before I leave…"
He looked at me with a sad and longing expression, something akin to those long pained glances I spared Zenki when he was not looking. "I know it isn't I that you love but my brother and I see that you have no intention of sealing us up…" He smiled and touched my cheek. "Be happy with him, Chiaki, but remember that I will always love you…" That was the first time he had addressed me by my name. He approached me one last time and kissed my forehead. "And that I shall return to you… someday… if you'll ever need me…" I reached up to place my hand against his that was resting on my face, only to find that it was no longer there.
"Goki?" I looked around. He was gone. Unconsciously, two teardrops trailed down my cheeks as I collapsed onto the floor, the ceremonial fire flickering in the distance. It took me a month to realize what those tears meant.
He hmphed. "Yeah, what is it?" It was the day before I was to perform the sealing ceremony on him. He had, as Goki predicted, become restless through time and I was advised by Granny Saki to do so. It was difficult but necessary… /It would be all for the best…/
"Are you sure you're alright with this sealing-up thing? I mean…"
"Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Just leave me alone. Will ya?"
"Zenki…" I sighed. This was the last day he'd spend with us and he still acted this way.
Then I was surprised when he turned to face me.
"What is it?"
"Zenki, what's wrong?"
"Chiaki… that is… arigatou gozaimasu…thank you very much."
My heart skipped a beat. Did that mean… I sprang up and enveloped him in a hug.
"Hey, woman! Geroff! Geroff! Need… to… breathe…"
I release him. "I'm sorry, Zenki, umn… I… I…"
He hmphed once again. "I am not taking back what I said BUT that doesn't mean you have the permission to glomp me."
I sadly smile at him. So much for confessing my feelings for him. "Right, I understand. I'd leave you alone now."
"Err... Chiaki… about that baka brother of mine…"
Strangely, my heart once again skipped a beat. "Goki?"
"Heh, the one with long blue hair who calls you master, the baka… Of course, it's Goki. Who else?"
I sweatdropped. "Well, what about him?"
"This may mean nothing now but I've noticed how much disturbed you were after he left. He may not have told you this but I think the baka has gone and fallen for you, which is such a disgrace if you ask me, but well, he did. And from the looks of it…" He eyed me smugly. "You seem to like him, too."
"What?! Well I... but… Hey WAIT! Zenki COME BACK HERE!" He had already gone off on his morning hunt.
I sigh at the memory. I never did learn how Zenki knew about it. I didn't really care. It was only then that I realized my loss. I cried all night and I wasn't really paying attention when I performed the ceremony the following day. We left the shrine a month later.
I stand up and approach the entrance, leaning upon the railing like I did that fateful night. The only difference is that there is nobody here beside me. The chilly wind blows harder, bringing with it memories of a love that I never know. If only…
The ceremonial fire flickers behind me, and as I turn to face its warmth, I find myself staring instead into sapphire blue eyes blazing with emotions that weren't there the last time I saw them.
I gasp, disbelief at the familiar sight of a handsome long blue-haired youth before me who has grown inches to pass my height. I ain't dreaming...
"Go..ki…" Tears flood my eyes as I reach up and hug him in spite of myself. "You came back…"
"I had to, Master…"
"No," He smiles. "For both of us, Chiaki." He comfortingly replies, running his tender fingers through my violet lock.
I blink back the tears and manage a smile upon hearing my name flow smoothly in that gentle tone of his, once again. "I see."
Maybe it isn't too late after all.
"Gomen nasai... please forgive me, ne..."
He looks surprised. "Whatever for, Chiaki?"
"For being a complete bakayarou…"
"For being foolish and stupid and…" I feel so nervous that I break our eye-contact.
I gather my courage to look up at him once again, only to find his beautiful blue eyes still gazing at me with so much intensity.
"Aishiteiru... I love you, Goki."
His tense features soften into a smile. My heart skips a beat.
"As I always have…"
"As I have, as well… though I never did realize it until after you left…"
He pulls me into a more substantial embrace and nuzzles against my hair. "I'm glad to be home."
I clasp his face to mine. "So am I, Goki. So am I." More tears being squeezed out as I close my eyes to savor his warmth.
The ceremonial fire burns ever so brightly as we settle next to it, as though even it rejoices in our reunion. Outside, the storm rages on.
Again... Below you...
Let the earth sleep silently.
Wings © Ryuuen 22 June 2002
All Rights Reserved.
What a sweet ending when the young Priestess and her Blue Guardian God reunited in the stormy night, isn't it? They finally realized the toll of living without each other, especially Goki as he seemingly returned to their place even prior to Chiaki and has been waiting there for her ever since. :)
Btw, I recognize that some parts of "Wings" still weren't polished and several faults existed due to the lack of reliable information in the authoress' days. Now a brief remark about the original version by Ryuuen Kurai:
Well... Goki calls Chiaki by her real name only when he's Akira, otherwise it's just "Master", NOT "Chiaki-sama" or anything as such. In the Spanish dub we found him sometimes call her "Ama Cherry" (Master Chiaki), it's INCORRECT, too. u_u Despite all this, I deeply appreciated Ryuuen's impression for AGo&Chia's relationship since, according to my guess, she hadn't once touched the Manga, that's why she mentioned in her original text that Master Ozunu used to be Zenki & Goki's "creator", and that Goki had only ONE child in the past. ):D Actually, our two Demon Lords existed long before they met Ozunu-sama (YES! It's "Ozunu" Enno, NOT Ozuno!), and I'm sure the authoress would be totally FREAKED OUT if she ever learnt that the Blue Demon Lord had not ONE but FIVE kids with his human lady, :giggle: at the same time chose Mount Oomine as his permanent resident where he had been honored as the leader / protector of Master Ozunu's disciples of Shugendou (the Shugenja or Yamabushi) from then on.
The common thing is that Goki's pastlife is often viewed as *tragic* by most fans, as in Ryuuen's "Wings" following the Anime story, or in my "Secrets" pursuing the Manga, etc. Why? There is a certain reason.
We all know the lifetime of a divine god obviously surpasses us human... for how many more years? Only God knows. u_u Goki-sama must have already accepted this bitter fact when he fell in love with his maiden and asked for her hand in marriage. But then he just disappeared in the year 700 AD (or 702) on the exile / death of Master Ozunu, exactly after 28 years of serving the great Bodhisattva of Japan. It's strange, indeed, since being entitled as the leader / protector of Ozunu-sama's disciples and considering Goki's character, he couldn't possibly abandon his duty on the call of *personal affairs*, right? (Well he actually did in my fic, but since Enno Chiaki *is* Enno Ozunu's descendant, it's FAIR! XD). Uhm, yes... Goki couldn't betray the trust of Master Ozunu, unless some terrible event occurred that made him no longer wish to be part of the living world and thus chose to seal his soul in one of his kids; as Chiaki once said, "It would be all for the best."
Still, I couldn't help wondering WHY ON EARTH the Blue Demon Lord was so eager to meet his new master and has been too attached to her ever since. He isn't the type who likes flirting with girls, so why? Remember his inner thought at the end of ep29 Anime while they were kneeling next to each other in front of the corpse of his faithful servant? "I'm not alone... anymore.", he said. Surprisingly, in Chiaki's character theme [Watashi no Takara-mono] as if it were her turn to reply: "Remember, you're not alone." - another *mere* coincidence, perhaps? :D
In the Anime, he couldn't be more happy as he quickly recovered from his adoptive father's death and dedicated his time to crafty sculptures as well as beautiful artworks having lived with Chiaki under the same roof. Even Abbot Jukai didn't spare it any thought when the idea of "Chiaki undressing herself to be Akira's model" occurred in his twisted mind. ^^; Chiaki, too, has treated him with complete respect and trust whereas tending to be somewhat violent and rude to Zenki. She has scarcely been seen doing anything without Akira in both Manga and Anime. Trust me! KDZ dialogues often cause lots of misunderstanding concerning Akira/Goki & Chiaki, as in vol 11 when the young Priestess expressed her wish to have a long hot bath, then she said: "Akira! Let's go together!" ^_^; Later we saw them walking side-by-side out of the hotel's hot spring. LOL BLAME THE EVIL CREATORs! XXDDD
Lastly, have a RAPTUROUS APPLAUSE to Ryuuen for accompanying her fic with the best song in KDZ Collection, namely "Senshi-tachi no Tsubasa" or "Wings of the Warriors"! Her wonderful translation helped set the story mood nicely, of which the end came an infinite love. :thumbsup: