Title: It Makes My Dome Hurt
Characters: R2-D2 and all your OT favorites.
Time Frame: ANH
Genre: dramedy
Summary: R2 recounts ANH
Disclaimer: It all George's jungle

Autours Note: This was originally posted on another site many years ago when FF.N was not even on my radar. It is the only epic, so to speak, I've ever written. I had a lot of fun with it and I hope you will too.

From a plot bunny by my friend Lola64

It Makes My Dome Hurt

I remember my brothers dying in battle around me…

I remember standing before the queen, being praised for my bravery….

I remember a little boy attacking a Trade Federation blockade…with me at his side…

I remember Anakin and the senator in danger…

I remember flying…

I remember Anakin and General Kenobi on Grievous' ship…

They needed me.

******

Now, the Princess needs me, and the name Kenobi has only a faint familiarity.

Our escape and subsequent crash was dramatic, but not as terrible as C-3PO would tell. We survived. We weren't damaged. He likes to fret. Sometimes, I think it's the actual fuel that keeps him going. Yes, we split for a while after we landed planetside. I knew where I was going and Goldie didn't. He knew nothing of the message. I tried to tell him, but he wasn't interested. I was not going to follow him this time. I had a mission.

As the Force would have it, we were reunited by the Jawas. That tazer, or what ever it was, hurt more than I thought it would. It does more than just put you to sleep. It shocks your systems into dormancy. I won't lie to you; I was as excited to see C-3PO as he was to see me when we found each other on that sand crawler. I didn't realize, no matter how capable I am, that being alone is not a comfortable existence.

I have to hand it to my partner. He did not hang me out to dry. He made it look good, but he wasn't gonna let me go. Maybe his six million forms of communication let him know ahead of time that the Orange Old Timer was going to blow a seal. Now the two of us are in the custody of a moisture farmer and his disaffected son. The boy looks unhappy to me. I wonder what makes his life so hard. It is hot here. Maybe that's it.

This little diversion from our original plan is making my dome hurt. I know the Princess was coming here. I know she wants me to deliver a message. I have to find this General Kenobi. C-3PO seems content with his new life. Like, being dropped on this desert planet was some kind of boon. He has always been adaptable, but we just left the Princess. How can he forget her so soon?

I have to find Kenobi…Why does that name sound so familiar?

It was cold when I left the Lars moisture farm. I didn't mind. As long as it wasn't freezing, I'd find Obi-Wan Kenobi. I didn't tell anyone I was leaving because no one wanted to listen. Luke had seen the Princess' message, and was intrigued, even excited, but he was not spurred to action. As I saw when I first met him, the boy seemed sad, even confined here on Tatooine. When I looked at him, something niggled at my memory circuits, but I couldn't make a connection. Goldie (He hates it when I call him that) harangued me as usual, repeating virtually everything the boy said. I knew what I had to do. So, when the two of them weren't looking, I went looking.

The desert was peaceful that night. At least, it appeared so through my optic sensor. I was happy not to be in the open desert. As C-3PO found out, sand gets in the most uncomfortable places. Even here, I doubt I will be able to avoid it. I was also pleased to be able to move freely along paths worn by travelers before me. Perhaps, one of these paths will lead me to Kenobi. There is that niggle again. It's like a very subtle stray energy surge. I've heard other humanoid beings call it a chill or hairs standing on the back of their neck. I'm not sure whether it's a warning or some sort of déjà vu? I'm a droid for Force sake. Why am I attributing these living being characteristics to myself? Kenobi-niggle-Luke niggle-Obi-Wan-niggle. My dome hurts even more, now.

I knew they would come after me once they noticed I was gone. The old man, Owen, had given Luke the responsibility of getting us cleaned up and on duty by this morning. I guess I threw a wrench into those plans. Luke will be scouring the desert looking for me. I'm sure C-3PO is right at his side bad mouthing me as usual. I really have no time for worrying about the needs of local teen. The fate of the galaxy rests on me getting this message delivered. The princess was desperate or she wouldn't have given me the information in the first place. The least I could do is get it to her intended recipient.

I had my sensors going almost constantly while I was out there. I'd been scanning for any inkling of technology. I heard a lot of strange noises, some closer than others, but I hadn't found anything. If something didn't happen soon, I'd be stuck; my only hope, another sandcrawler.

It wasn't long before two things happened. One, Luke's sand speeder hit my radar. He would be here soon and my mission would be a failure. He'd wipe my memory for sure. Niggle. This has got to stop. Secondly, those noises I was hearing were getting closer and, if I'm right, a lot less friendly. Just as I wheeled into a one in a million hiding place, Luke's speeder arrived…and there was another hit on my radar.