|Marik and Bakura Read ITS MY LIFE!
Author: sailorblaze PM
Takes place during "Marik and Bakura: 333 Ways". While in the hospital, Marik and Bakura MST a really bad Portal fanfic. Abridged Personalities.Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor/Parody - Marik I. & Yami Bakura - Words: 1,632 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10-04-11 - id: 7437574
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
While in the hospital, Marik and Bakura did some more MSTs. This… was one of them. (Again, Abridged Personalities are used.) This takes place sometime between chapters 16 and 17. WARNING: MAJOR PORTAL AND PORTAL 2 SPOILERS AHEAD.
Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Portal is owned by Valve. IT'S MY LIFE! is owned by MarrisatheWriter. The MST3K theme song is owned by Joel Hodgson and Best Brains, Inc. California Gurls is owned by Katy Perry.
Bakura groaned, as he was unable to turn around in the hospital bed, being mostly injured by Joey. "What is it now, Marik?"
Marik asked, "Bakura, do you know about the Portal series?"
Bakura responded, "Marik, I do, and yes, the cake is not a lie."
Marik yelled, "I didn't mean that! It was just that I found this fanfic the other day about someone at Aperture. I thought we could do… AN MST!" Marik then began singing:
In the not-too-distant future
In 2011, A.D
There were 2 guys: Marik and Bakura,
Somewhat different from you or me –
Bakura then stopped the music. "Marik, I'm bloody familiar with the theme, and in fact, I know this from beginning to end. Now, what exactly are we – "
AN: Hi guyz this is my first story its what I think happens iin Portla 3!
Bakura groaned, "Oh bugger, not this story…"
Marik replied, "Oh yes, Fluffy, it is that story!"
ITS MY LIFE
CHAPTER 1 RETURN TO PORTAL AN A SUPER HUGE SUPRISE!
Marik clapped his hands. "Oh, I love a good surprise! I think it will be that the cake exists!"
Hi my name ish Marissa Roberts and I was doing tests with that other gurl Chell but she escaped.
Bikinis on top!
Bakura, on the other hand… "Oh great, an OC. At least her handwriting's barely legible."
Marik stopped singing, and yelled, "GO AWAY! We want the player character, not you!"
Glados had captured me in the science lab places and made me do bad tests. There was no thing fun bout thetests an Glaods would never let me sleep or eat or bathroom or any thing.
"I immediately take it back: her bloody handwriting's terrible."
Marik had more points. "First off, it's called APERTURE FRIGGIN' SCIENCE! Next off, everything is fun about the tests! You get to fly and stuff! I bet she's only read the wiki."
"FOR THE NEXT TEST YUO WILL WORK WITH ROBOTS!" Glados screemed to me. Some robots came out of weird tubes and looked at me and I looked at them.
Bakura murmured, "If only we could play a drinking game…"
Marik then pointed at the EXTREME – SIZED! computer screen, yelling, "YOU'RE NOT GLADOS!"
The robos were one a blue ball an the other was a orange line thing. "THERE NAMES ARE ALTAS AN P-BOY NOW LEAF ME ALONE IM SAD." Then Glados started to listen to some Avril Lavinge music and cry. Ever sinse she realized she was a humon before she became a goth emo and was always gettin on my nerves.
"HOLY FRIG! It's that fanfic that everyone hates!"
Bakura asked, "Which one, Marik?"
Marik responded, "The one with the Goths in it! Bakura, get out of here before Tara Gilesbie shows up!"
Bakura then realized, "Didn't she delete Caroline?"
"Hi b**** we are here to test you." Atlas shrugged (GET IT IT'S A MOVIE!). I was shocked at the bad words and glared to Altas.
Marik then started yelling, " BITCH!"
Bakura just shrugged. "No, I don't. Are you going to have a bloody explanation?"
P-Bod was just starin' at my bobs so I kicked him his robot place. That made him angry so he shot a portal at me and made me fall into it over and over and P-Boy and Altas were lolling at me.
Marik laughed. Then, he commented, "I'd be laughing, too. I love that trick!"
Bakura then had another realization. "Isn't P-Body a girl?"
Altas took out some drugs and he an P-Boy STARTED TO SMOKE them. I was fedup with all of portal labs and jumped from teh portals. I ladled onto my lung fall boots and glared mean at Altas and P-Boy.
"And then she died, because she forgot to reinsert her lungs. The bloody end."
Marik yelled at the screen, "IT'S APERTURE FRIGGIN' SCIENCE! And also… RANDOM WORD EMPHASIZING!"
I was soooooooo mad at those jerks for portalling me an calling me a b**** (AN not even gonna say that word LOL) so I portaled them too and I saw how they like it they didant. Altas angered at me an P-Boy said "You broked are drugs now you will pay!"
Marik had a lot to say. "First off: BITCH. Second off, it's funnier when they do it to you. Thirdly, I'd like to know how you can anger at someone."
Bakura just facepalmed.
Ann he punched me right in the face!
I started cryin from the pain and those jerks just lolled at me an tried to beat me up some more with there portal gunz.
Sereal ours later I was cryin in a pool of blood while THOSE JERK ROBTS did more drugs and drank beer an past out.
Bakura asked, "Is she dead yet?"
All I wanted was my companion coob to comfort me but Glados was makin it do other tests an we didn't see eachother in moths.
Bakura angrily noted, "I don't know how an inanimate object can do stuff."
But most off all I wanted Wheetly. He was the only nice robot I ever met an he had a super sexay British aksent, but Glados body turned him evil an he got shot in space by Chell.
Marik turned to Bakura, and cried, "Hey Bakura, this 'Wheetly' guy sounds a friggin' lot like you!"
Bakura asked, "Marik, did you even play Portal 2?"
"I only played the first game."
I rubbed my stomach and rembered my secret. Noone knows this, but Wheetly an I shared one secret night together an now I could tell I was pregnant with his robot ball/human baby.
Bakura slammed his free hand on the table. "You. Bloody. IDIOT! That isn't even possible!"
Marik said, "I agree."
There was a window above me an I looked out an saw the moon where Wheetly was. I missed him so much like a guy I missed a bunch.
Tears droped down my face so Altas an P=boy started lolling at me again an calling me names like "Fat Uguly B****!"
Marik yelled, "Why can't you just shout an EFF!ing curse word already?"
Bakura answered, "Because the authoress doesn't curse?"
I stared rite at their lauffin' feces and said my first words!
Bakura's eyelid twitched. "Ok: EW. How does that even laugh?"
Marik, however, started to geek out. "OMGSHE'SGONNASAYHERFIRSTWORDS-"
"OMFG YOU GUYZ ARE SOOOOOOO RUDE I HATE YOU!"
There was an awkward silence. After 7 days of staring at the screen in said silence, Marik finally stated, "Wow, she's a whiner."
An I ranned off holdin my portol gun in one hand an holding nothing in my other hand because it was empty. My hare was streaming behind me an all the robots were saying how pretty an hot I was so I yelled at them too an said a lot of cusses so they stopped yellin at me.
Bakura commented, "Which, of course, she didn't post in the story, because she's so bloody perfect."
"Why cant I jus be a normal girl going to high school an have a boyfriend that isn't space lost!" I cried an hugged the place were the baby was going to be was.
Bakura cursed under his breath. Marik turned over, and asked, "Bakura, what's wrong?"
Bakura turned to Marik. "Marik, we're dealing with a bloody Sue."
Marik screamed, "NOOOOOOOOO!"
There was a strange noise coming from the necks room and I looked in a saw…. Glados was cutting herself!
Marik angrily said, with his voice heavily laced with sarcasm, "Oh great, it's Not-GLaDOS again. And look! Not only is she completely out of EFF!ingcharacter, she's defying reality! What an excellent writer!"
Bakura could just yell, "IS THIS EVEN BLOODY POSSIBLE? How can a robot cut itself? They don't even have any blood!"
"CHELL IM SOOOOOO SORRY I NEVER TOLD YOU YOR SISTER'S NAME IS REALLY MARISSA ROBERTS AN SHE HAVE SPESHUL POWERS AN CAN SAVE THE WORLD IF SHE BELEEVES!"
"See? I told you that she's a bloody Sue!"
Marik just gaped. "The player character's name is CHELL?"
Bakura turned to Marik. "Did you even play this series?"
"I gave up after 5 friggin' tests, so I looked up the rest of it online!"
Then robot blood started goin everwhere and I realized that….. Glados had sewisided!111!1!
"HOW IS THAT EVEN FRIGGIN'/BLOODY POSSIBLE?"
Marik suddenly realized, "Hey! We synchronized!"
THAT WAS A HOLE LOT OF TWISTS, IF I GET SOME GOOD REVIEWS ILL MAKE MORE CHAPTERS MAYBE WHEETLY WILL COME BACK AN IS GLADOS REALLY SEWISEDED? FIND OUT NECKS TIME!
Bakura sighed. "One down, 17 bloody more to go."
Marik could only scream, "FRIG NOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Yeah. I know, I know, it probably ain't funny, but I did want to show you guys what else happened at the hospital after Yuma's visit. And the crossover should be up by now.