Author: LoxusXV PM
Kid has a new TV show and as the title states it talks about symmetry! The much procrastinated eighth and final episode is now here!Rated: Fiction K - English - Humor - Death The Kid - Chapters: 8 - Words: 4,069 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 12-23-12 - Published: 10-19-11 - Status: Complete - id: 7478504
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Perfectly Symmetrical Waffles – Endorsed by Death the Kid!
"Hello and welcome, today I shall explain to you the importance of symmetrical waffles," Death the Kid said into the camera for his short show on symmetry as he held up a perfectly symmetrical waffle, "See how beautiful this waffle is! Perfect symmetry! No flaw in sight!" he exclaimed happy to be around something so symmetrical then he held up another waffle, "Now this waffle is hideous! No symmetry at all!" Kid's smile turned into a scowl as he threw the asymmetrical waffle onto the ground, "It makes me sick! How can people stand to put such garbage into their bodies? It's disgusting! Makes no sense at all! People who can stand to eat asymmetrical food are pathetic! I hope they all perish! They've got no right to live!"
As Kid continued his OCD induced rant Liz appeared at his side and whispered in his ear, "Hey Kid you aren't doing a great job at selling your 'symmetrical waffles.'" With that Liz went back to help Patti with the camera.
Death the Kid held his fist to his mouth and coughed, "Oh right, I am very sorry, please excuse me for my outburst. Now for those who have been wondering, obviously all of you must be curious by now, how do you eat a symmetrical waffle symmetrically? It's rather simple." He grabbed a plate, butter, syrup, waffle, and knife, "First place the waffle exactly in the center and make sure to spread the butter on it evenly; make sure not to ruin its beautiful symmetry. Then you must cut the waffle evenly into eight perfect pieces. Once that is done, very carefully and symmetrically pour the syrup on evenly. Now it is ready to be consumed," the asymmetrical boy smiled to himself at his excellent work. "If any of you would like to try symmetrical waffles, then go to your nearest mirror and call this number '888-564-4242'; these perfect waffles come in packages of eight so that we may keep to the beauty of symmetry. Please call now and I shall deliver them personally."
As he was about to finish his show, Black*Star burst through the wall, "Yahoo! The great Black*Star is here!" the loud mouth moron exclaimed snatching a waffle from Kid's hand then taking a giant bite out of it, "Wow! These waffles are amazing! Perfect for a god like me! Ahahaha!"
Kid slowly turned toward Black*Star with a glare so scary, Black*Star himself was terrified, "Black*Star you moron! How could you ruin the symmetry of my waffle! It was perfect! Now you will pay!"
Black*Star gulped then started to run away with Kid chasing him on Beelzebub.
Liz sighed and went in front of the camera again, "Well that concludes this episode of 'Symmetry Talk,' please join us next time when Kid explains the importance a symmetrical household."
Author's Note: ...I keep getting crack ideas from my friends...also I believe that random crack is more important than math homework...meaning I've been writing crack rather than doing math homework...