|Attack of the Yukkuris
Author: UnendingEmpire PM
Something funny turns into something deadly! Yukkuris begin to overrun Gensokyo, but their actions are far too organized to be just a strange wave of behavior. Reimu and Marisa set out to discover the cause!Rated: Fiction T - English - Adventure/Humor - Marisa K. - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,623 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 12-20-11 - Published: 11-22-11 - id: 7573175
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
I got bored when I started plotting this and had decided to finally learn what the fuck a yukkuri was. Once I did, I had a devilish idea to create an ARMY of various types of yukkuris, all commanded by one astounding mastermind! I'd also like to throw out that there is not one, but THREE masterminds behind this new yukkuri incident. If you'd like to start guessing who she (or he (they?)) are go ahead, but the only hint you'll get is that they're an unlikely trio. I won't tell you if you're right or wrong if you ask me, but I will throw some ideas around to screw with your head even more in the notes! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!
Also, keep an eye out for the stupidly obvious Austin Powers reference in this chapter. On one final note, I did have to give some forms of yukkuri names I decided on (e.g. Yuka-types became Yukuyuka) because the information I gathered didn't have a name for some or it had bad names (e.g. Yuka-types were Yukari) and I also don't know if some types of yukkuri already exist or not (Miyako, Nue, Satori, etc.) so if you have any information about yukkuris on a text file, please send it to me to make this story better!
Reimu sat back casually in the summer sun at the Hakurei Shrine. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary in the least, at least not until what had to be at least a hundred yukkuris of just about any type imaginable bounced right through her field of vision. "What the hell?" She saw all sorts of them, even some that weren't supposed to be around during summer. It seemed fishy, but she ignored it. She didn't have nor did she want a yukkuri, since that would be just one more thing she would have to support with the donations she never received. She had enough trouble just taking care of herself and the drunken freeloader called Suika living here. Maybe I should start a taxi service? That'd be good news for Genjii at least, since he'd be able to go out some more, but…everybody in Gensokyo can fly so they don't need a taxi turtle. While the miko tried to figure out what to do, another swarm of yukkuris of nearly every variety bounced by, all of them making a high-pitched laugh as another voice from behind was yelling at them.
"That's mine! I stole it first, ze!" Marisa ran right past Reimu, not even paying her any attention. She saw her stolen item in the back of the swarm! A pesky bouncing head in the very back was holding it, as Marisa leapt forward to grab it, squishing the yukkuri and causing bean paste to fly all over. "Ha-hah! It's mine, ze! Reimu, did you see any…other…"
Reimu did not look amused. She was practically covered in the bean paste. Jumping up to her feet, Reimu declared "This reeks of an incident! Marisa, meet me back here in a few hours, we're going to find out who's behind this strange yukkuri behavior!"
"Where are you going, ze?"
"To take a bath and get a change of clothes!"
"Alright, I'll go home and…I dunno, find a yukkuri of my own or something, ze."
Three black-cloaked figures were sitting in a room, all facing each other. "So," their leader said, the one large pink eye on her cloak standing out brightly as she made sure they knew they were ready. "The yukkuri army is ready to go?"
"I can tell that you're worried," a second one said, with three purple eyes on her cloak. "You think that this might be a huge mistake, and that you'll get caught. We've covered all of our bases, and we can never be detected by the miko or anybody, Uni."
"Thank you for the confidence, Tri." Turning to the figure that hadn't spoken yet, who had two blue eyes on her cloak, she asked "Di, are your preparations complete?"
"Yes. I still need to run some tests, but so far everything's looking good. If this works, all of Gensokyo will have to meet our requests to avoid total destruction."
"Very impressive. Alright, this meeting is adjourned. Go home, see your friends and family, blah blah blah. We'll meet here again once we've caught word that somebody trying to solve this incident has made contact with our army." Uni stood up, watching her comrades do the same and dispersing. She had to be going, too. If things were to go as predicted, she would have to be home soon…
It had been a few hours, and Marisa was standing outside of the Hakurei Shrine waiting for Reimu. In her hand was a Yukkurisa that she had found trying to sneak into her house. Rather than the usual turning it into a snack, she had decided to keep it. Besides, how better to solve a yukkuri-related problem than with another yukkuri? She even decided to name it!
Reimu stepped out, now bean paste-free, and saw the yukkuri in Marisa's hand. "What the hell? You're not going to torture it, are you?"
"No, ze! I'm keeping it, and I've decided to name it, ze."
"Can't wait to hear this…"
"I shall call it…Mini-Me."
"Because it looks just like me! Fight yukkuris with yukkuris, da ze! Let's go find the mastermind!" With that, Marisa hopped onto her broom and took off. Past experience for both Reimu and Marisa indicated that randomly shooting at just about anybody who got in their way often led them to whoever was behind something going on, but it was tough to determine if that method would work again this time.
Reimu took flight after Marisa, moving quickly to catch up with the witch. "We don't even know where to start looking," she yelled as she continued catching up. It was true that nothing had been happening recently, and that Gensokyo was about due for an incident, but for some reason Reimu didn't think that yukkuris were what really made this an incident. She saw they way they had acted this morning with them running about in swarms and stealing people's stuff. No, something else had to be in control of the situation…but what, or more accurately, who? And then there was the big question, that being where the search for clues to the incident should start. "Marisa," Reimu said. "We're going to Kourindou."
"Sure. I've been meaning to drop in anyway, ze." Marisa steered off to the side, now flying in the direction of the shop of all sorts of interesting items from the human world. Marisa understood what Reimu was thinking when she came to that conclusion. Aside from being a decent-at-worst shopkeep and a powerful magician when the situation demanded it, Rinnosuke usually had information that would otherwise be hard to obtain. That was part of why his name was in the Bunbunmaru so often; because Aya went to him a lot to learn about any interesting happenings in Gensokyo.
When the duo landed at Kourindou, they found Rinnosuke out front with a mop sweeping away at a mess of various foods, mostly bean paste. That could only mean one of two things. One, the yukkuris had already gone through here, or two, Rinnosuke was very bad at preparing his own food. "Rinnosuke," Marisa said. "Hi there, ze."
"Ah, Marisa. It's been a while; for a second I thought the piles of junk in your house finally swallowed you whole. I've got all sorts of new merchandise; will wonders in the human world never cease?"
"I doubt they will, but we're not here for your wares."
"Oh? Then what brings you all the way to Kourindou?"
"We need information on the recent wave of odd behavior that's been sweeping over all the yukkuris."
"I might know something. But before I share what I know, I need to ask you girls a favor. There's two more mops in the back of the store, I need you both to grab one each and help me finish up this mess."
"Finish up? Looks like you just got started."
"Oh, believe me, it was bad. I'm lucky none of my wares were stolen, but you know how it is. You kill one yukkuri, the others start scattering or inflating themselves. I even had to use some grenades from inside the store to get rid of them all!"
"Yes. Now go get those mops."
It was long and hard work for all three of them, but eventually Reimu, Marisa, and Rinnosuke managed to finish cleaning up the monstrous mess of bean paste. The sun was beginning to set now, and the trio were inside the shop while Rinnosuke confirmed that the yukkuris really didn't take anything in the event that one of them had escaped his field of vision. "Alright, everything's still here. Now, what did you want to know?"
"Why are the yukkuris acting so weird?" Marisa held out the small crystal she found that morning, and said "About fifty of them mugged me and took this, but I got it back. Then there was apparently a bunch of them at your shop this morning, ze. What do you know, Rinnosuke?"
"All I know is that there are certainly a lot more yukkuris than there used to be. Other people coming through here also told me that when the sun goes down they seem to head for the Bamboo Forest of the Lost. I also heard that lots of Yukkuremis and Yukkuflans seem to come from there at night as well, and go back when the sun starts to come up. Then the tons that went into the forest come back out. I don't know what's gotten into them, and I'd love to help you investigate, but I have to defend my shop you know."
"Wow, you sure know a lot about this, ze."
"It's what I'm good at. Also, if you want any weapons from the human world to fight them with, I might give you a discount."
"Anything of interest, ze?"
"Just the usual. Swords, guns, explosives-"
"Explosives, da ze!
"The biggest you have!"
"Uh, Marisa," Reimu asked. "Where's that yukkuri you found?"
"Dunno. She must've fallen off the broom, ze. Anyway, explosives!"
Rinnosuke went into the back of the shop, coming back out with several boxes filled with all kinds of things that combust or explode. "I also have a sale on lighters right now. Buy one, get one free."
"Let's see, I'll take… and…that one! And two lighters."
"Okay." Rinnosuke began handing Marisa the explosives she said she wanted, while adding up the total she owed him. "And the lighters are buy one get one, so your total comes in as…one-million yen please."
"Do you have it?"
"Reimu, do you…nah, you don't ever get donations, ze. Lemme see…" Marisa reached deep into every possible crevice of her clothes, looking for the money that she now suddenly owed Rinnosuke. "I'm broke."
"Well, I'm willing to trade it all. How about, the whole deal for that crystal?"
"It's a deal!" Marisa handed the half-youkai shopkeeper the crystal, and began stuffing all of the explosives into one very large satchel she found behind the shop while cleaning up the bean paste mess. "Have a nice day, Rinnosuke, ze!"
"You too, Marisa. If you need anything else later, come here with money first."
"I will, ze!" Marisa ran out of the shop, getting on her broom and flying straight up so as to get a very good look at all of Gensokyo. From where she stopped, she could see all the way back to the Hakurei Shrine and as far in the other direction as the Scarlet Devil Mansion. Yes, from here she would certainly be able to see if the yukkuris really went into the Bamboo Forest of the Lost like Rinnosuke said they would.
Amazing...this is the first time any of my works have so much as mentioned Rinnosuke. It's because before now I never really needed him for anything, but since I had to give Marisa the Maniac a bunch of explosives (which is SUCH a good idea) he became an important character who sent our miko and witch off to the Bamboo Forest of the Lost. I bet you're still trying to figure out who's behind it. Well, Rinnosuke sure knew a lot about the way the yukkuris were behaving, and how did he manage to stop some 300 yukkuris (from SPARTAAA!) from breaking into Kourindou which has not only a door, but windows? I also have Windows! XD
On a final note, if I need a certain type of yukkuri before I have any info on it (i.e. if I need a Yoshika (who I just call Miyako anyway) yukkuri in the next chapter) I will probably make up stuff about it myself until there is official information. I wonder if Satori-type yukkuris (Satorin?) can read minds like Satori, now that I'm talking about other forms of yukkuris