Author: Mechanical Oven PM
After having a little fit, Bowser is forced to take anger management classes in order to control his anger. Will he and the others taking the class be able to control their anger? Or will they get in another stupid fit?Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor - Bowser - Words: 3,643 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 02-22-12 - id: 7862525
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Sometimes people find anger scary. However, sometimes anger can be hilarious, hence why I'm making this in the first place.
I think I had an idea of something like this a couple of months ago, but originally, it only had just Bowser in the anger management class. I thought that I should make it a little different by adding some more characters in the class as well. Anyway, I'm not going to say much here. Enjoy!
And also, nothing is owned by me, if anyone cares.
It was a normal day back in Bowser's Castle. Bowser was still making another scheme to kidnap Princess Peach, and his underlings were busy watching for any intruders coming into the castle. Two of his minions were massaging his feet, and boy, were they not enjoying it.
"Ugh… How long do we have to massage King Bowser's feet?" a Goomba asked, using his head to massage Bowser's foot.
"I don't know... Maybe around... Wait… Why are you using your head?" the Koopa asked. "In fact, WHY are you even doing this in the first place?"
"'Cause I ordered him," Bowser stated as he glared at the Koopa. "Now shut up and keep massaging my foot, ya wussy!"
"Eeeeugh… why do your feet smell like my grandma?"
"You have a grandma?" the Goomba gawked.
"Well duh! What are you, stupid?"
"Didn't I tell you two to shut up? !" Bowser growled, smoke coming out of his nostrils. "If you keep yapping like that, I'm going to fire you!"
"…PLEASE!" the Koopa begged, getting on his knees before getting fried by Bowser's fire breath. "Wait, I thought you said you were going to fire me?"
"I just did. Now get back to work!"
While the two minions continued to massage Bowser's feet, he took out a piece of paper that included his scheme.
"Ah, yes! Here we go! Project I-Kidnap-Princess-Peach! Yeah, I know that sounds clichéd, but I'm sure that this will work! This will require us to get a couple of airships and other stuff I don't remember to uplift Peach's Castle and send it up into space! Then, we'll… Hold on a second…"
The minions in Bowser's throne room froze as Bowser looked more carefully at his plans.
"WHO TOOK MY AWESOME PLAN? !"
"S-Sir…? Why do you always have to y-yell?" a Paragoomba gulped.
"'CAUSE I'M ANGRY! DEAL WITH IT!"
"Hey, Papa! Are we going to go out and kidnap Mama Peach again?" Bowser's youngest son, Bowser Jr. came walking in with a wrench in his hand. "I got all the robots ready to capture her!"
"Junior… I've got some bad news…" Bowser sighed. "Apparently SOMEONE took my awesome plan from before and replaced it with a previous plan that failed! You know the perpetrator?"
"Papa… I don't even go through your stuff…"
"Then who's the idiot responsible for this? !"
"Uhh… Sir? I think I might have an idea…" a Koopatrol trailed, raising his arm.
"Really?" Bowser gasped as he accidentally stomped on the Goomba massaging his foot and knocked the Koopa away while running over to the Koopatrol. "So spill the beans! Who's the idiot?"
"Well… It's more 'idiots' than an idiot. But, I'll tell you… It's…"
"Pbbbbbbbbth! Look at this crappy plan! It's like the same plan Bowser always makes!" a red Ninjakoopa snickered as he held a flashlight over a piece of paper in a dark room. A black, green, and yellow Ninjakoopa were snickering beside him as they looked at Bowser's plan.
"All it's about is kidnapping Princess Peach and forcing her to marry him!" scoffed Black. "When does he ever learn?"
"I mean, that scientist shaped like an egg at least thinks of different things besides kidnapping someone!" Green remarked.
"My mom's cooking is better than this!" Yellow declared until he received looks from the others.
"Yellow… We all share the same mom…" Red grumbled. "Look, long story short, this plan sucks."
"Are we going to give it back?" Green asked.
"Nah. This is better off in Yellow's nose."
"Wait… You wanna put that up my nose?" Yellow gawked. "But… Will it fit?"
"If I just put it at the right shape, then we can fit it in. Although, if King Bowser saw us walking around and noticed Yellow's nose looking a little different, he's sure to know that he's got something hidden."
"I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE, KOOPA BROS.!" All four Koopa Bros. gulped as they heard Bowser banging on the door.
"Grrrrrrgh! At a time like this? !" Red whined. "You've gotta be kidding me… We've gotta hide the plans, and fast!"
"Put it in Yellow's nose!" Black suggested.
"Hey! I love my nose!" Yellow retorted.
"Then… Why don't you eat it?"
"But when I go to take a dump, it might be hard for me to get it out!"
"Then… Uhhhh…" Red pondered, walking back and forth in the room. "You know what? We need to keep it somewhere where he'll never find it. We'll just… Wait, what's with you, Green?"
"I think I have to go to the bathroom…" Green winced. "I think I drank a little too much soda…"
"All right, that's it!" Bowser roared as he knocked the door down. "WHERE ARE MY PLANS, KOOPA BROS.? !"
"Here ya go," Red handed Bowser his plans back. However, it was wet, and from what Bowser could smell, it wasn't pretty.
"What did you do to my plans?"
"I peed on it," Green stated as he gave a smug look. "That's my present to you!"
"Oh, I'll give you a present… When I'm done frying you up!"
"And this is where we run, Koopa Bros.," declared Red as he and the rest of his clan ran out of the basement and ran out of the castle. They could hear the loud sounds of Bowser's feet behind them.
"Hold on… Is that guy following us?" Black gawked.
"Yeah! And he's moving pretty fast!" Yellow gulped.
"I told you you shouldn't have peed on the plans, Yellow!" Red scolded.
"Wh-What? ! But I didn't…"
"Shut up already!"
The Koopa Bros. continued to run from Bowser, who didn't look like he was breaking a sweat as they left the Dark Lands and began to make their way straight for Toad Town.
Yoshi was the first to notice the Koopa Bros. and Bowser heading straight to Toad Town. Being the helper that he is, he went to the most reliable person that he knew.
"So, Luigi… Do you have any fours?" Mario asked as he and his brother were playing a game of Go Fish at the table.
"Go Fish, bro," Luigi replied as Mario drew a couple of cards, annoyed. "Do you have any threes?"
"Right here," Mario handed Luigi a three, who happily smiled and took the card from him. "Gee, Luigi… Whoever knew that I would lose Go Fish to you?"
"Wait… What do you mean?"
"Sometimes people expect me to win in games rather than you… I'm not saying that you're terrible at games."
"Are you saying that I'm just the underdog?"
"Why would I ever say that to you? You're my bro! I care about you! Remember when you were in trouble that one time? If I didn't care about you, then I wouldn't have come to rescue you!"
Before Luigi could say anything else, Yoshi busted through the door.
"Yoshi! (Mario! Bowser's heading to Toad Town!)" Yoshi warned.
"What's Yoshi saying?" Luigi asked.
"I think it's something important…" Mario pondered. "Well, maybe I should go and follow Yoshi. If it involves Bowser, then I better stop him right now!"
"But… What about me?"
"You should come along, Luigi! We haven't had something to do in a while, so why not?"
"All right! Now that's something I like!" Luigi grinned as he and Mario did a brofist. They both got on Yoshi (who could barely hold both of them) and headed straight for Toad Town.
"Now, Princess, you cannot just stay in your room fixing yourself up," Peach's old steward said as he stood by the door to Peach's room, waiting patiently. "Bowser could break in and grab you at any minute!"
"You need to stay calm, Toadsworth," Peach assured. "I want to look my very best when we go visit Mario at his house. I'm actually really excited to go see him!"
"Ahem… Yes! You definitely do! But, at any rate, Bowser could come! Don't you remember the other times he came out of nowhere?"
"So I believe it's best you come out right now before…"
Toadworth's eyes widened as he heard a crashing noise somewhere in the castle. Even Peach heard it and came out, looking worried.
"Toadsworth… Do you think Bowser's here again?" she gulped.
"Nonsense! It was probably just a vase! Carry on."
She was about to go in until they saw the Koopa Bros. enter the hallway they were in and come their way.
"Are those Bowser's minions I see there?"
"GET BACK HERE!" the Koopa Bros. stopped for a minute and looked at one of the vases on one of the drawers. When Bowser came charging at them, Red took the vase and threw it at his head.
"Bulls-eye!" Red smirked.
"What was the point of that anyway? Was that even supposed to hurt?" Black asked.
"You really think a vase is going to do anything? !" Bowser roared as he slowly rubbed his head. They could all see the rage in his eyes. They were like they were on fire!
"Bowser? ! What are you doing here? !" Peach exclaimed.
"Uhhhh… What do you think he's ALWAYS here for?" Red scoffed. "What are you, a ditz?"
"I'm going to RIP YOU APART FOR WHAT YOU'VE DONE!" Bowser roared, breathing fire at the Koopa Bros. "And you know what? I'll make sure that every single bone in your body is broken when I'm through with you!"
Bowser turned around and saw Mario, Luigi, and Yoshi coming their way.
"Ugh… Just great. Now I have Mario and Green 'Stache to worry about! This day is getting better and better by the freakin' minute!"
"Hmmmmm… Looks like someone's in a cranky mood today." Mario noticed.
"I AM NOT!"
"Yoshi? (If that doesn't show, then what does?)" Yoshi questioned.
"Errmmm… Yes… So, Bowser… Care to explain why you're so angry?" Toadsworth stammered.
"You guys don't care what I think. Besides, I'm too ticked at these guys to kidnap Peach anyway." Bowser grumbled.
An idea suddenly struck Toadsworth. "Hmmmmm… Perhaps you could take a little anger management class?"
"Why would I need anger management class? ! I'm fine just the way I am!"
"Dude… You tried to burn us…" Red trailed.
"And I plan on doing that too."
"For peeing on your plans? Come on! Quit overreactin' for once!" suggested Black.
"You know, I do have an anger management class starting this next week," Toadsworth remarked. "I've got a couple of people from different worlds that requested to take this class to control their anger and be a little more mature over reasonable matters."
"Maybe you should take it," suggested Peach.
"When's the last time I've ever gotten as angry as that?" Bowser asked.
"Remember when I flicked you on the nose for a joke?" Mario remarked. "You went ballistic over me. I think you need it."
"No way! Anger management classes are stupid anyway! You gotta listen to the teacher babble about stupid stuff, and they're usually annoying and…"
"I'm the teacher, you know…" Toadsworth trailed.
"Well, I'm not doing it!"
"Please, Bowser? For me?" Peach smiled, giving him a sweet look.
"No. I hate classes."
"Well, here's a deal," Mario started. "You can kidnap Peach for a whole day if you can actually sit through an entire week of anger management class."
"Wait… Mario? ! I don't want to be kidnapped!" Peach gasped.
"What? For real?"
"Well… I guess that's the only thing that'll convince him…"
"Oh, yeah! This is going to be SO worth it in the end!" Bowser fist pumped as he turned to Toadworth. "Relax, old man! I'm going to be at your class next week! For now, I'm not kidnapping anyone!"
"What a relief," Luigi sighed.
"But I'm still burning the Koopa Bros.,"
"Wait, what? !" Red gaped as they got engulfed by Bowser's flames.
Out in the gardens of Peach's Castle, Toadsworth was just finished with getting the chalkboard in. Mario, Luigi, Yoshi, and even Wario and Waluigi helped get all the seats ready. There were a couple of flags of Mushrooms on the walls, and there were even a couple of trees with apples. One of them contained Mushrooms, surprisingly.
"So, why did Wario and Waluigi come here in the first place?" Luigi whispered.
"Because I bet that if he couldn't help set this up for Toadsworth, then he wouldn't be able to receive my ten coins," whispered Mario.
"You made a bet? !"
"Relax. Ten coins isn't much anyway."
"Heh heh heh! I'm almost done!" Wario cackled as he got the last chair. "Hey, Waluigi! You ready to catch this thing? !"
"I'm ready when you lose your B.O.!" Waluigi snickered.
"Yoshi, (Watch him miss,)" Yoshi said.
Wario tossed the chair to Waluigi, but he ended up missing the catch and injuring Waluigi in the process.
"D'oh, I missed!"
"Yoshi? (See? What'd I tell you?)" Yoshi grinned slyly.
"Good work, gentlemen!" complimented Toadsworth, who put the last piece of chalk near the board. "I appreciate the work you've done for me!"
"It's no problem, Toadsworth," Mario assured. "Let's just hope this actually changes Bowser for the better."
"And let's hope I can get my money! So, Mario… You going to hand it over?" Wario asked, having his hand out.
"But you were actually just throwing the chairs to Waluigi for the most," Mario noted. "…But, a deal's a deal."
Mario took out a bag of ten coins and dropped it in Wario's hands. With that, he grabbed the injured Waluigi and left the gardens.
"Is this all you need?" Luigi asked.
"I believe so!" Toadsworth assured. "The students should be coming here anytime now!"
"All right, we'll see you later then," Mario said as he, Luigi, and Yoshi waved goodbye to him.
"Tally-ho!" As Toadsworth finished waving goodbye, he heard the loud sounds of someone stomping.
The first one to arrive was Bowser, who had an apple with him. When he put it on Toadsworth's table, he noticed that there was a bite mark on it.
"Uhhhh… Thank you for that, Bowser…"
"All right, when are the others coming here?" Bowser asked. "Let's just get this stupid thing over with."
"Patience, Bowser. They should be coming any second…"
"Aw, come on, Escargon! Do I REALLY have to take this class?"
"Well, Your Majesty… You do tend to blow a fuse once in a while… …OK, I take it back. You always blow a fuse."
"Oh, I'll show you…"
"Wait… What are you…? OW!"
Bowser noticed a penguin wearing a red robe come in the gardens, along with a lavender snail with a big bump on his head. From what he could see, the penguin was probably the one that came here for the class.
"Ah, yes! You must be King Dedede from Dream Land, is that correct?" Toadsworth asked, looking at his list.
"Yeah, that's right! I'm a king in my world! And you better treat me like one here!" King Dedede growled, slamming his hands on the table. "If not, I'm gonna give you a good whoopin'!"
"Hey! I'm the king in this world!" Bowser retorted.
"How about you prove it?"
"It's on!" Bowser raised his fist, ready to punch the king of Dream Land.
"Now boys… We're not here to fight!" Toadsworth said, standing in the way. "This is an anger management class, remember?"
"…Fine," King Dedede said as he turned away and sat at the seat farthest from him.
"OK… Now we just need to wait for…"
"Sonic, seriously! Why an anger management class? And from another world? You're nuts!"
"Well, you're the one who's obviously nuts if you keep yelling for dumb reasons…"
A red echidna came into the gardens with a blue hedgehog. Obviously the echidna looked like the one with the annoyed look.
"But why are we going to our rival's world? We're supposed to compete with them in the Olympic Games! Not take an anger management class with them!" Knuckles growled, shaking his fist at Sonic.
"Take a chill pill, Knucklehead, geez…" Sonic sighed.
"Not until this fist hits your face!"
"Ehhhh… I don't think so. I have a certain 'Baldy McNosehair' to go after right now." And with that, Sonic ran off, leaving Knuckles to go over to the table.
"Ah! Knuckles the Echidna! So very nice to see you!" Toadsworth greeted. "I am Toadsworth, your teacher!"
"A red echidna? You've gotta be kidding me…" King Dedede trailed. "What makes him so special?"
"And I wanna know why I was forced to stop guarding the Master Emerald to take this glass!" Knuckles grumbled, steaming with anger. "If I could tear something up, I swear that I'd do it right now!"
"Yeah! I know!" Bowser nodded. "The reason why I'm even stuck here is because I wanna kidnap the princess!"
"Please, have a seat, Knuckles," suggested Toadsworth.
"Yeah, yeah…" As Knuckles took his seat, another person came. This time, it was a human girl. A human girl with hot pink hair, a blue sweatshirt and hot pink boots, that is.
"Ugh… All right, I'm here." she groaned.
"Ah! Kumatora! Have a seat!"
"Fine…" Kumatora looked at the rest of the group. "What the hell? I have to be here with a fat turtle, a fat penguin and a red echidna? !"
"Hey! I'm not fat!" Bowser whined. "I just have a big shell…"
"And look at you!" Knuckles snickered. "Who ever walks around with pink hair anyway?"
"You want me to give you a knuckle sandwich?" Kumatora growled, shaking her fist near Knuckles's face. "I hear that they're great for your teeth!"
"Yeah? Well how can you give a knuckle sandwich to someone who's named Knuckles?"
"Then how about I shove my foot up your ass? Then you'll be sorry!"
"Students! Calm down, please!" Toadsworth cried, hitting the bell. "I don't want to have any fights here!"
"Well, I shouldn't be here anyway," Kumatora grumbled, crossing her arms and sulking.
"We just have to wait for one more person and we'll be all set!" declared Toadsworth as he heard the steps of someone coming. A man wearing a space suit with an antenna with a red glowing bulb came walking into the garden, panting.
"Huff… Huff… I'm sorry for coming here a little late… I needed to use the size ray to size myself to get here…" the captain panted. "My name is Captain Olimar. I'm here because I have a Pikmin that needs to take this class."
"Pikmin? What the hell's a Pikmin?" Kumatora asked.
"Are they edible?" King Dedede asked.
"Are they easy to burn?" Bowser asked.
"Are they a good punching bag?" Knuckles asked.
"Errrrmmmm… Honestly, I don't know how to answer your question… I think I'll just drop him off and go!" Captain Olimar threw a red leaf Pikmin and ran out of the gardens as fast as he could. They noticed that the red Pikmin gave them all an angry look.
"That's a Pikmin?" King Dedede gawked.
"Well, he is someone who needed anger management…" Toadsworth trailed. "But, it just says 'Red Pikmin' on my list. What's his name?"
The red Pikmin walked over to his seat without a word.
"Let's call it Steve," suggested Knuckles.
"Nah, I think we have enough Steves around here…" King Dedede trailed.
"How do you know?"
"Uhhhhh… Well, I was thinking of calling it Dedede-Is-Awesome."
The red Pikmin slapped King Dedede before turning away from him. "Well… He doesn't like it."
"Uhhh… Red? I don't know…" Kumator shrugged.
"Uhhhh… All right, I guess that works." Bowser shrugged. "But not without burning it first!"
"Bowser! Wait!" Unfortunately, Bowser was not stopped by Toadsworth when he breathed fire on Red. But, due to its ability, it was still standing without a scratch.
"Wait… WHAT? ! It's immune to fire? !"
"Well, I'm glad that the Pikmin wasn't harmed," Toadsworth sighed in relief, getting his papers ready. "Now, let us get started, shall we?"
"Ugh… Well this is going to be a long day." Bowser groaned as he face palmed.
And indeed it would be.
Yup. An anger management class. I think these are characters that would need it because of how much they can get angry at times, especially Bowser and King Dedede. The red Pikmin, however, was something I wanted to put to make it a little interesting.
There's only going to be one more chapter after this, so stay tuned for that one when it comes!