|Mon espoir, mon amour
Author: thewhitespirit PM
There was nothing left to live for. Yet, tiny sparks of hope gleam in this big existence, like pearls in the murk. He could grow wings and fly away from this dim location, though he knew it wouldn't be possible. Flashes of horrifying images exploded all around him. First a monster, laughing. A beautiful ocean. She's trying to grab someone's hand, and an electrifying golden light…Rated: Fiction M - English - Romance/Adventure - Lightning & Hope - Chapters: 17 - Words: 41,752 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 08-12-12 - Published: 04-09-12 - id: 8007459
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Oh, dear. I'm pretty sure you all know my now that whenever I upload a chapter nowadays, I have a very long explanation/excuse/story to tell about why I'm not uploading a story everyday or even twice a day like I used to. But this time, I really don't have an explanation! I've just not been feeling well, and that I'm going to try to sleep it all away. I was gonna start eating again so they (the doctors who have surprisingly grown quite fond of me!) took my IVs off but I fell asleep and I woke up with the IVs back on, my brother gone, and my friend there with me telling me that apparently its Thursday, when I last remember it being Monday, lol. But yeah, overall hospital overview if your still with me! You're all pretty much knowing the gist right now so I'm primarily just going to say that I am ever so slowly recovering! I've never really had a good immune system, and overall natural healing is better than getting a ton of medication. And really all I do is drink water and sleep.
Oh! Right! I'm out of the ICU now! Yay! After a week of sitting in an isolated room I get into a room with a television. Pretty sweet! And no, I have no idea when I get to go home…
On to the story! I have a pretty large amount of energy, not physical energy, obviously, but more mental. So I hope you like this chapter! I'll be subtly adding a quote from Noel in here. Just 1 sentence. 10 bonus points if you can find it… Heheh…Tell me in a review if you can! I'm going to try to make the chapters longer. :)
Oh, also, I virus infected my computer, so now I have to rewrite this story all over again. I'm hoping I won't rush it, but I am pissed (pardon my language but it's the best word to describe it lol) cause the chapter was almost 4,000 words and I worked SO hard on it this morning. Grrrrrr… :)
"We need to sleep. We'll think about other plans in the morning." Lightning said. Everyone nodded without any hesitant thoughts and went to sleep.
"Lightning…" Lightning jumped at the sudden break of silence, and looked at Hope, who now was staring deeply into her eyes. Lightning stepped closer to him and kneeled down to look at him.
"What is it?" Hope blinked a couple of times to regain his bearings. He realized he didn't know where he was, but ignored it and grabbed Lightning's shoulder, pulling her closer. Lightning's eyes widened.
"I… I need to tell you my focus." Lightning nodded, preparing for the worst. She tightened her grip on his cold hand and began to become impatient. Hope took a couple of seconds to make sure he could explain it as clearly as he could. His heart clenched up in fear and he tried to stop himself from containing any sort of nonclarity in his sentence.
Lightning had never felt so horrible in all her life. Ever. She hated seeing Hope like this. Serah and Vanille, she hated seeing them like this, too. Even Snow. They all were exhausted, scared, mortified, even. Hopeless feelings drenching their hearts, making them too heavy to carry on without frustration. Lightning had to attempt to shut out her pain and focus on her goal. But somewhere beneath those layers of numbing pain, she wanted to disappear from this world completely.
"There was – are… you okay?" Hope whimpered weakly, Lightning jumping out of her trance to remember she was talking to him. She quickly responded back, making sure not to worry him.
"Oh, no, I was just not paying attention. Please, what's your focus?" Hope nodded shakily and took in an exhausted breath.
"There was… a river… and I saw –" Hope gasped in an abrupt amount of air and stressfully yelled out in agony. He could barely hear the echoes of Lighting screaming his name and shaking him. Snow was quickly awaken and alert when he saw Lightning screaming and Hope practically hyperventilating. What was happening now? As soon as he began to walk over he looked at Vanille to ask for help.
She was shaking.
"Vanille…" Snow whispered, approaching her cautiously. She suddenly cried out something and curled into a ball and shutting her eyes tightly, her fists clenched and her heart beginning to beat faster. Snow instantly changed his cautious walk into a sprint over to her. He grabbed her hand and tried to look into her eyes. He started to faintly begin to see her brand begin to glow, and he went into a panic.
"No, no, no… Please! VANILLE!" Vanille's closed eyes suddenly became relaxed and her fists unclenched, becoming more delicate.
"Vanille, are you okay? Why were you freaking out earlier? Hope's gonna be ok, I promise." He noticed that she chose not to answer. Snow quickly checked her brand, waiting to see an advancement like Hope.
But it was exactly the same as before. Snow drowned out the screams of Lightning and began to look at Vanille. It was then when he realized something that he begged to not be true.
He gently placed the back of his hand on her neck, feeling for a pulse.
But it was as silent as a windless lake in the dark of night.
He tried to prevent his breathing from becoming unsteady and put his hand on her stomach and his ear by her nose and mouth.
But she was as stiller than she could ever be on her existence in this world. Snow's eyes began to tear up as his normal strong, self – centered being began to tumble down under his feet. He whimpered out a cry of defeat. Vanille was gone. He couldn't let it happen. He unconsciously began to tilt her head back and pressed his lips against hers, blowing in as much air as he could. He threw his hands on her chest and began to try to make her heart beat again.
"Vanille… wake up. Please don't do this to us. Please don't do this to me… Vanille!" Snow let out grunts of anger as he waited for Vanille to come back.
Serah heard strange voices, strange sounds coming from places around her. She hated this dream. It was becoming a nightmare, and she wanted out. Her eyes shot open and feelings of relief washed over her.
Until she realized it was real.
Screaming echoed towards the front of the cave; Serah's eyes gravitated themselves towards it, and saw Lightning. She squinted to try to see in the dark, and suddenly saw the moon shine on Hope's shimmery green eyes, unfocused and staring into nothing. Horrified, she then watched Lightning's eyes sparkle with shiny wet tears and then splashing onto her face; she continued to shake him, screaming his name.
"HOPE! HOPE! COME ON, FOCUS ON ME! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING? PLEASE! HOPE!" Petrified, Serah began to look for Snow. Why wasn't he helping her? What the hell was he doing that was more important that this? She suddenly heard the echoes of a cry coming from the back of the cave. Serah's expression became even more mortified when she saw Snow's lips pressed against Vanille's. Serah gasped slightly and tried to look closer, shakily and cautiously taking steps towards them. The rising sun made the sky blood red as it reflected off of Snow's face; Serah suddenly realizing he was trying to revive her. She covered a hand over her mouth to prevent a scream as she came up to Snow, who now had her wrapped in his arms. She watched as his body shake as he silently sobbed, clutching Vanille's body closer with every minute.
She hated seeing Snow sad. It wasn't really a common thing for him to be sad. Angry? Very common. But sad... almost impossible.
"S... snow," Serah whispered, her hand shaking as she went to touch Snow's shoulder.
"She – she's-" Snow didn't finish as tears began to flow down his eyes again. She heard his heard smash into two, and it echoed in her ears like a siren. Serah stared at Snow for what felt like years, waiting for him to calm down. A couple of centuries later he still hadn't stopped or gotten any quieter. Her eyes solemnly moved over to Vanille, who lay limp and lifeless, yet... peaceful in Snow's arms. And then she yet again had something pass into her mind. Vanille was gone.
And she was never coming back. Why didn't Serah wake up earlier? She could've helped Snow with the CPR... or she could've called someone if she didn't throw her phone on the ground when he tried to contact Lightning. Guilt washed over her. This was all her fault. She could have solved this. Vanille would've survived. Vanille. Sweet as vanilla, as tough as a rock when she needed to be. As beautiful as a rose, as delicate as one, too, but as mysterious as hot weather when it rains.
She suddenly snapped herself out of her trance and realized that Lightning wasn't screaming anymore. She left her mourning Snow to himself and stepped unconsciously over to her sister. She noticed that Hope's eyes were now closed, his breathing unrecognizable and his silver hair blowing softly in the slight breeze. She saw Lightning, who now was sitting with Hope lying in her lap. Her head was down with a look of defeat in her prayers and her eyes were closed as well, her breathing loud and steady.
Serah took a moment to look outside of the mouth of the cave. The sun shined brightly over the forest, making all the trees glisten and blow gracefully and the grass sparkle with an after the rain dew, green and lush from the rain the night before. Serah inhaled a deep breath and smelled the water and felt it lightly repair her heart on the inside.
It was then that she noticed that the usual obnoxious loud bird chirping she would normally hear was silent. Her pupils lifted themselves up into the trees and saw all the birds staring down into the deepest part of the cave, their eyes large and doll like. Serah didn't dare look back at Vanille or Snow again. She looked down at Lightning.
"Is what?" Lightning mumbled; Serah noticed her body shrinking in sadness.
"Is Hope... okay?" Lightning looked up at her little sister with a sympathetic, apologetic expression written on her face. She waited a couple seconds until she saw Serah's face on the verge of crumbling, then nodded. Both of their eyes shot back to Hope.
"His brand advanced again," Lightning said, her voice cracking with every word. Again? When was the first time? Serah felt guilt trying to drill its way from the back of her head to front; she continued to try to push it back and fill the whole it drilled with other feelings, but the drill kept turning back on and forcing its way through. Serah kneeled down and lifted Hope's clammy wrist, noticing arrows beginning to shoot out the side of his wrist. Serah wiped a tear and set his wrist down gently and waited for Lightning to say something.
"...Vanille, could you give me the map in the bag?" Serah's soul jumped as heard Snow flinch from the edge of the cave and she waited for him to say something. Great, she would have to say it herself.
"Claire? Vanille is..." she whimpered and grabbed Lightning's hand. Lightning shook it off as she picked up Hope and confusingly followed Serah towards Snow. Was he laughing? Wait... was he... crying? Lightning handed Hope to Serah and stepped over to Snow.
Then she saw something horrifying. She slid down on her knees and stared at Vanille. She noticed how unconscious she looked. Slowly tilting her head, Light's stomach lurched as she realized something.
"No." Lightning simply stated, tears welling up in her eyes again. She abruptly shoved them out of the way and looked up at Snow.
"NO, no, no, no, Snow... how?" Snow shakily stared into Lightning's eyes and as fast as he could he explained what happened. He looked like a zombie after. Setting Vanille down, he walked over to Hope.
"What's wrong with him? God forbid he got taken to." Serah shook her head then pointed to Hope's wrist, dangling from Serah's body. Snow grabbed it and noticed the large arrows and the microscopic eye that had appeared in the center. Trying to avoid anyone seeing his fury he turned around and looked at the front of the cave and saw someone standing in front of it, one of their legs casually bent and a staff in one of their hands.
"I can help."