
Jade West purposely crashes her car in the middle of the night, and is left with low blood flow, and several injures. The doctors say she won't make it, and Beck is there through her final moments. Bade Songfic.
Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Angst - Beck O. & Jade W. - Words: 2,765 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 3 - Published: 04-22-12 - Status: Complete - id: 8048099
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Disclaimer: I do not own Victorious, or My Last Breath by Evanescence.
Hold on to me, love
You know I can't stay long
There had been a car accident. Twenty minutes later, Jade West was lying in a hospital bed, expecting the worst. Her body, bandaged bruised, and her eyes, they just couldn't shut. Her mind was telling her this was the worst idea she had ever had, but her heart, in a slow rate, was telling her it was the easy way out. Out of everything she had been through this past year. What point was there going on in a life she was surely not needed in? That's why this 'car accident' hadn't been an accident at all.
Beck Oliver held her cut hand, sitting beside the hospital bed that his five-year girlfriend had been lying in, for what seemed like ages, but in reality, it had only been a couple of minutes. Tears slowly poured from his eyes, making clean streaks down his cheeks. He knew that Jade had lost a lot of blood tonight. Beck knew that she was injured severely, and could barely breathe. Beck knew he was losing Jade tonight. And it was no accident.
"Why...?" Beck asked, not looking at her face, that was now getting more pale as the minutes passed. "You made that turn...on purpose, and, now, there's no coming back. Jade, you had so much ahead of you, but you have gone and thrown it all away...why?" He asked, not realizing he had asked the same thing three times. The cardiac monitor's sounds were getting slower, but fast enough for Jade to hang in there for a couple of hours.
"My life's not what it was in high school. My mom always there beside me, having plenty of friends, straight A's, being able to face this cruel world, and, you deserve so much better..." Jade said in a whisper, while breathing heavily. Tears stumbled down her face and landed on her soft, but hard, hospital bed. "The cutting wasn't enough. I needed to just get rid of the pain permanently."
Beck bit his lip, knowing that Jade had been going through tough times, with her mother passing away, her father treating her like garbage, and Jade had slowly lost touch with Cat, André, Robbie, and even Tori as college went on and on. Nothing Beck said could stop her from cutting. "I love you, Jade, you're the best thing that's happened to me. Just don't die..." Beck softly said, breaking into more tears.
"I have to leave Beck, face it, just move on when I die. Don't spend you're life weeping over me. You have more of a future than me. Marry a girl, someone like Vega, who will keep you happy." Jade said in another whisper, holding back her own tears.
All I wanted to say was
I love you and I'm not afraid
"Jade, I'll never move on from you. I'll never forget anything you've said to me...you're the only girl I've wanted to be with. I could have helped you...we could have talked through this. You could've lived..." Beck said, with his grip on her hand grew tighter.
"I don't want to live. I never wanted to talk this over, you were already worried enough with my cutting. But, Beck, I've want to let you know...if it hadn't been for you, I would have done this months back. I love you, never forget that." Jade said in a stronger voice. It was a sincere tone that Beck had almost never heard from her anymore.
Beck's fingers circled on her palm, calming her a bit. "I love you, Jade. But...don't you regret it by now? If would have talked to me, or anyone else, you would be okay, we could be still living happily, and we could have our very own fairy tale ending." Beck had choked up on the last part, memories coming back to him on how many times Jade had joked about that.
"I'll never regret it."
Can you hear me?
Can you feel me in your arms?
"But, Jade, why do you want to leave me? If you loved me so much, why did we end like this?" Beck's voice had changed it's tone, from a more calm, tearful voice, to a scared, innocent, depressed voice.
Jade couldn't hold it in any longer, she let out all her tears at that moment. "I love you Beck, please, please, never question that. I couldn't stand to see you get all stressed over me, you have a life, like I said earlier. But, unlike you, I have no purpose. My singing career had it's years, but it's over now. I never made it past callbacks on a single movie audition. My grades are lower than average, the only time I talk to Cat is when she's not busy with her rehearsal schedule. And, right now, I just want to be with my mom. But, at this moment, just hold my hand, hold it until I go limp. Please." Jade begged, something she doesn't do often.
"I wasn't planning on letting go." Beck redeemed his calm, tearful attitude.
Holding my last breath
Safe inside myself
Are all my thoughts of you
Sweet raptured light, it ends here tonight
The cardiac monitor kept it's slow beat, but both Beck and Jade knew that it wouldn't stay like that for long. It would get slower and slower, until it's flatline. And after that there was nothing, it was all over.
Jade wondered how this world would be without her. She knows it won't be different considering she never had that much to give to the world anyway. Jade knew that Beck would never be the same, though. Not only had Beck tried to help Jade, she had helped him in return, with his parent's divorce, his cousin's death, and helping him with his acting career. Now, Beck was famous, everyone recognizing him as he walked down the street. He couldn't have done it without Jade. And, she knew that.
But, it wasn't a good enough reason to stay, she thought. Everything else overpowered. Who knows, this life could be better without her.
The realization hit them both though. The breaths she was taking now, were the last breaths she would ever take. Jade's vision had been getting a bit messy, her eyesight blurry one minute and almost normal another. But she could see Beck, with his free hand on his forehead, attempting to cover his red, bloodshot eyes.
He didn't want her to leave obviously.
But she was ending it tonight.
I'll miss the winter
A world of fragile things
The weather was weird. It didn't usually get this cold in California, even if it was Winter, Jade's favorite season. She loved the pitch black sky nights, with only a couple of stars shining in the sky. She loved Beck's arms around her, when they were outside, and Beck thought it was too cold. Sure, she shrugged him off all those times, but that doesn't mean that she didn't like it.
She had known from the start of the season that this would probably be her last Winter. And last week had been her last New Year's Eve party. And her last New Year's kiss.
Beck was certain that Jade would miss this world, no matter how much she denied it. But now, Earth will never be walked on again by Miss Jadelyn West.
But, then, she said something unexpected. "Say something Beck. Anything, a story, memory, anything. I don't want to die in silence." She said softly, still lying down flat on her bed, but holding Beck's hand.
He had to think for a moment, but came up with something perfect, that even Jade would love.
Look for me in the white forest
Hiding in a hollow tree
(Come and find me)
"Remember, when I first moved here from Canada, and I was only ten years old..." Beck started, trying to smile for his girlfriend.
A ten year old Beck walked through a snowy forest, with nothing but a jacket on. He didn't expect it to snow in California, all he thought it would be was a bit chilly, that's all. But he was lost. And the worst part, he had to be home for dinner in exactly fifteen minutes.
Then, he heard it, a sound behind a nearby tree. He looked in the direction of it, and he swore that he saw a small hand leaning at the bottom of the tree.
Slowly, he walked towards it, hoping to find someone that could help him. But, when he looked, the brown-haired girl crouched up against the tree with a book, had hissed at him.
"What do you want?" She asked bitterly.
"Um...hi, I'm Beck, I was just wondering, if you could show me a way out of the forest." He had said, a bit shy.
The girl took a good look at him before responding. "I'm Jade. Now leave." She said sternly.
"You don't understand, I really need to get home. Please?" Beck asked with pleading eyes.
Jade sighed in distress before responding. "Fine, whatever." And with that she got up, and Beck followed Jade the whole way.
They didn't say a word to each other the whole way, except when getting out...
When they had reached the outside of the forest, Beck had somehow grew fond of this Jade girl. He thought it would be fun to push her buttons a bit, later, if he ever saw her again.
"Um...I guess I'll see you again soon." Beck said awkwardly.
"Whatever. Bye." Jade said, turned on the heel of her small foot, and walked back into the forest.
Jade even smiled at that memory, it was funny at that time, they had no idea they had no idea they would be in this situation. One of them was dying, while the other was the one standing by her as she takes her final breathes.
I know you can hear me
I can taste it in your tears
She started to feel funny, her body felt even weaker, and she grew paler. The cardiac monitor's sounds got a bit slower this time. And Jade's vision seemed to play with her again. She could feel her blood-flow starting to get slower and slower.
No, no, no, she can't go now! Beck thought, his eyes widening, and his grip on Jade's hand getting even tighter.
"You can't leave me...not like this." Beck said, even more tears rolling.
"Beck, you'll have me...I promise. I might not be alive in about ten minutes...but I'll never be totally gone. I'll be watching over you, every day. But, I know when I have to say goodbye" Jade said, as the cardiac monitor went a bit faster, as she started to breathe a bit heavy.
Holding my last breath
Safe inside myself
Are all my thoughts of you
Sweet raptured light, it ends here tonight
"No matter how much I don't want to say goodbye, I have to say it..." Jade said, her voice going in more of a whisper. "I'm so sorry, Beck." She said, suddenly.
"Why?" Beck asked.
"What do you mean 'why?' I mean that, I'm sorry you have to go through this. I know if we switched positions, I know that this isn't easy...for both of us I mean. It's going to let the good things of life go." Jade said, trying to make her voice stronger, but it was obvious, she was in pain right now, dying slowly.
Beck squeezed her hand a bit, as if that would calm her down again. But then he wondered, "If you're going to miss me, and other good parts of life...then why die? Why couldn't you just hang on for a while, on me, on those cold Winter nights, on everything that I know you love. If you have to...pass...I just want you to be happy, but, why didn't you just bear through it?"
Jade simply answered, "I'm tired of being Jade West, the girl with the bottled up emotions. I'm not always the most courageous person in the world, to most people's surprise. I guess, I'm just sick of being sad, and being the only one who understands myself, I just think that wherever I'm going, it'll be a better place for me." Jade took a breath. That took a bit of energy out of her.
But she knew it was almost over now.
Closing your eyes to disappear
You pray your dreams will leave you here
But still you wake and know the truth
No one's there
"Jade?" Beck calls out in a soft whisper. She slowly turns her head more towards him. Beck started to take out something from his jacket pocket...it was a purple, small, velvet, box. He opens it, to a small, shiny ring. An engagement ring. "This has been lying in my pocket for the last week...and I needed to know the answer...would you have said yes...?"
Jade was tearing up even more. Her voice was almost gone. "Yes," she croaked out. "I would have said yes, but it's too late, I'm sorry again..." Now, she was crying into the bed railing.
"Maybe it was my fault...if I asked earlier...this wouldn't be happening wouldn't it? Would you have found your reason to stay?" Beck asked cautiously.
Her tears kept pouring as she weakly nodded. "Beck...I'm not sure if I have much time before I'm gone...but, I want you to know...I'm still happy with my decision. I want to be with my mom." She managed to say. "And when you wake up tomorrow morning, make your first thought of me...so I know you'll remember me. Promise me..." Jade had also managed to pull out.
Beck sighed and said, "I always think of you, you're always on my mind. I wouldn't dare forget you, ever."
Say goodnight
Don't be afraid
Calling me, calling me
As you fade to black
"One more favor." She said quickly. "before I die."
"Anything." Beck replied.
"Kiss me."
Without hesitation, Beck leaned in over the bed and gently kissed her, and murmured an "I love you." somewhere in the middle. When he pulled away, Jade's eyelids were very close together, and her skin was even more pale then a couple of minutes ago. The cardiac monitor was getting slower by the second. This was it. She was going to die.
"Goodbye, Beck." Jade said, as she slowly closed her eyes. I'm coming, Mom...she thought, as one final tear ran down her cheek.
(Say goodnight)
Holding my last breath
(Don't be afraid)
Safe inside myself
(Calling me, calling me)
Are all my thoughts of you
Sweet raptured light, it ends here tonight
The flatline sounded from the cardiac monitor, but to Beck, it sounded like a million guns, being fired.
"Goodbye, Jade." He whispered to her body, and let go of her hand.
Beck would never get the thought through his head...
Jadelyn West had just taken her last breath.
Okay, that was random, I know. The idea came to me tonight while listening to Evanescence, and I thought it would be a cool song-fic. Yes, I know both Beck and Jade are both very OOC, but it takes place in the future, so I guess their character might as well change a bit. And yes, the ending was rushed, and cliché, but whatever. I wrote this in the middle of the night out of pure boredom...and I'm way too excited so I'm posting it now.
Oh, and it's my first song-fic, so constructive criticism is appreciated.
Oh, and I know, I should be updating my Bade story Two People, One Mission, but that's getting an update soon, don't worry!
Rock and Roll,
GG
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