|Oh My Shattered Dreams
Author: RoseLeBlanc PM
Not romance but complete AU and it doesn't relate to my other fic. Emily is fiften and has been put in foster care by her parents. JJ meets her in an unexpected place and can't stop thinking about the poor girl with hollow eyes and a dark past. Ch 5 has been reposted.Rated: Fiction T - English - Angst - E. Prentiss & Jennifer J./JJ - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,633 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 09-08-12 - Published: 04-22-12 - id: 8051279
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
DO NOT OWN CM! This applies to the whole fic. If I did would Em be leaving? NO! She wouldn't! Anyways have fun reading and I thank you for doing so. Please review if you have time :)
I opened my eyes to an unfamiliar room. I blinked slowly, almost lethargicly, my eyes felt dry and they itched. Slowly at first but then like a dam breaking open my memories of the night flowed back into my brain.
What the hell had I done? Why had I agreed to stay with a lady I met at a woman's clinic after openly sobbing into her open arms? Where had my logic gone? My commonsense?
I up on the couch, tucking my ratty hair behind one ear. I pulled the blanket JJ had placed on me off and folded it into a neat little square. I adjusted the cushions just so and straightened out the pillows.
There was no way I could stay here; not after that embarrassing display of emotions. Not to mention I didn't know the lady. Although I couldn't shake the feeling of deja vu. I swear I had seen her eyes before. They glittered with emotions selflessly. There was something so imploring about them. Something so familiar.
I shook my head trying to make the thoughts go away. I floated across the room with well placed steps; I couldn't wake her up. JJ would surely insist I stay and eat. I couldn't though I needed to get away. I couldn't handle her caring about me. No one did. I was numb to it. But when someone did I couldn't handle it. If I let one person in others would follow and undoubtedly one of them would hurt me. That's why I built up my walls; to protect myself.
Bending over to lace up my shoes a gut wrenching pain raced through me. Everything burned with the searing pain of a malicious intent.
Grunting animalisticly through clenched teeth I curled up into a ball on the floor. The kitchen tiles were cool on my burning forehead but my salty tears that ran into my mouth were much to warm. You may suffer minor pain or a burning sensation; the doctor's words ran through my head. All of a sudden I was so fucking angry at those stupid doctors who preyed on young vulnerable girls. The ones that said they would help,the ones who said my parents wouldn't find out. They did find out so they illegal abortion; ya kinda stupid. The pain started to ebb along with the anger.
I sat up and propped myself against a cabinet. When I felt like I could move again I stood up. Rummaging around in her kitchen drawer I found a notepad and pen. I scrawled down some stupid excuse for leaving and thanked her for her hospitality. I also apologized for going through her drawer.
Once I was outside by the bus stop I lit up a cig. The putrid smoke filled my mouth leaving a bitter taste but it filled my lungs with warmth and stopped me from picking at my nails.
I thought about the poor unassuming woman up in her apartment. Honestly I felt bad for leaving when she had been so nice but I knew I would just be a burden for her.
I smelt the stench of diesel fuel and heard the screaming of badly maintenanced brakes. I reached into my pocket for change as I stepped towards the bus in front of me.
"Emily!" Her small hand closed around my arm. My cigarette dropped onto the cracked pavement beneath our feet.
"JJ?" Her hair was lopsided, she wore oversized sweatpants and a wrinkled white tee shirt; she looked like she had just been asleep.
"Please Em, don't go back there. I looked them up last night." She admitted sheepishly.
"I don't need a ride. Sorry." I mumbled to the bus driver.
"How do you know about them?" I asked as I turned to face her.
"You said something about being shipped off by your parents. So I got a friend of mine to run your name through the system. That foster care place; it seems pretty bad."
"They can be a bit demanding sometimes." I said choosing my words carefully.
"Enough people have hurt you already." Her voice was different. It was steady, not a question but a statement.
I sighed and bit my cracked bottom lip. My eyebrows mashed together.
"I could take care of you, you know? If you want I mean. I've always thought being a foster parent would be great."
I wanted to say yes so badly but I just met her. A small voice inside my head told me I hadn't even met my current foster family before going there. But what if she just felt obliged to? I looked her in the eye. Her bottom eyelashes were clumped together with a paste of tears and mascara. She hadn't gotten much sleep, her eyes were bloodshot; covered with a maze of tiny red veins. Her face was soft and kind.
"I think I'd like that." A grin broke onto her face.
It was infectious and soon I was smiling too. Then she laughed.
"I can't believe my neighbours are actually seeing me like this!" She motioned to her wild hair and baggy attire.
I started to chuckle but stopped when an all too familiar truck rolled up. The paint was cracked and rusted. The window squeaked as it rolled down.
"Emily what the hell are you doing! We were looking for you all night!" Fucking right I thought. "Get your ass in here now!"
"Excuse me, who are you?" JJ asked in a cool voice even though it looked like she wanted to sock the guy.
"That brat's dad."
"Foster dad." I interrupted. He glowered at me. I met his gaze evenly and squared my shoulders.
"What are you doing with my daughter?" He asked JJ even though he was still looking at me.
"Well you see, sir, she's actually my foster daughter now. Sorry." She added unapologeticly. His fat stubble covered chin dropped as his mouth fell open. The grease stain on his wife beater became more prominent as he shifted uncomfortably in his seat.
His distorted face was now an ugly red colour that shined from the sweat on his brow. "We"ll see about that." His voice had taken on a dangerous lilt and his beady round eyes had darkened.
JJ stood her ground fearlessly in all of her five foot two glory. "You can't hurt her anymore." She turned her back to him then and put her thin warm arm around my shoulders. She led me back up the flight of stairs to her apartment.
"Thank you." I whispered so quietly I wasn't sure she had heard.
"That's what families do. And believe me we both could use a family right now." I couldn't control the smile that plastered it's self onto my face.
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