Author: DearSweetPapercut PM
"If she couldn't trust her own judgement then what did she have left to count on?" set post 13x17. Previously one-shot now more.Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - O. Benson & N. Amaro - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,053 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 08-08-12 - Published: 05-14-12 - id: 8115789
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Set post 13x17
Hope you all like it- please review.
(My first Law & Order: SVU story- I'm usually hiding out in the CSI corner for FF)
Disclaimer: I own zilch.
The night air felt comfortable on her skin, settling like an old companion as Olivia made her way towards the cab. It has been such a long time since she'd felt this weak, this exhausted, this drained. One shift had changed everything- or at least that was how it seemed.
As she glanced at the reflection of herself in the window as they cab crawled through the streets of New York she wondered where her self confidence had gone. The one thing that she always been able to rely on no matter what had been the fact that she was good at what she did. She often found herself being saddened by the things that she had missed out on over the years- marriage, children, a settled life. But when she compared it to what she had achieved- the fact that she had been able to put some monsters away- she would remind herself that perhaps those scarifies had been worth it.
When did that stop?
Olivia wondered when it had become that what she was doing wasn't enough- that there were still cracks that some of the guilty fell through. If she couldn't trust her own judgement then what did she have left to count on?
It felt as if she doubted herself in almost every way, not just professionally but also personally. Her relationship with David had ended, and her attempts to comfort herself that nothing else could have been done made little impact. Olivia couldn't deny the sinking feeling that was becoming a comfortable part of her life. And as the bright lights of a passing car blinded her she realised that she once again found herself alone.
While with David she had attempted to push aside the memories of returning every night after a hard shift to an empty home. To have no one to share the small insignificant details of her day with, for no one to be pleased to say that she had made it through the day. Those memories seemed all too real in the front of her mind as the cab pulled up outside of her apartment.
Taking a deep breath she prepared herself for another evening alone- another evening spent with her thoughts. She paid the cab fair and made her way to the stairs of her apartment building noticing someone familiar leaning against the door; Nick Amaro.
He had a bottle of Merlot in his hand and a pizza in the other- with a small smile Nick shrugged his shoulders as if explain that he didn't know where the idea had come from but he was there.
"I thought you could use a friend." He said replying to the confused look she was wearing as she climbed up the steps.
With nothing but a nod Olivia let him in not fighting against the opportunity to make a friend when she'd just lost a lover.
It was time to put herself back together.