Disclaimer: Touhou belongs to Zun.

A/N: Ehehe... I can't remember who it was that suggested Vampires! If it was you, please do say so!

Night, Keine's classroom, Keine's PoV:

Remilia should be here by now... She said she would come by as soon as it was dark enough, as per our agreement! She's getting docked a pint for this...

Just as I had decided to lower her payment, a scarlet haired woman slid open my door.

"We are here, as you requested, Miss Kamishirasawa." What's Meiling doing here? I've never seen her away from her post before!

"Booored..." Wait, that doesn't sound like Remilia...

After Meiling had cleared the doorway, Flandre Scarlet made her grand entrance soon after.

"W-w-what's she doing here? !" I hid behind my desk, as I had heard that that girl can destroy anything she can make eye contact with.

"...You know, if she really wanted to harm you, she would do so from the mansion... Anyways, Lady Remilia couldn't make it, so she figured it would be funny to send her sister in her stead. I'm simply here because... Well, need I say why...?" Funny, my ass! That girl could- wait, did she say that she could destroy me from their mansion? That's an enormous range!

"Ahaha... R-really?" The thought of the sort of damage that little Vampire could cause, yet doesn't, was enough to humble me.

"I don't want to make all my playmates go kyuu! That'd be boring!" ...Again, how is it funny to send her?

Just then, another joined us; she bounced her way through the door, arms reaching out before her, her head banging into the top of the door frame. "Ooooooww..." She tried to rub the top of her head, but was far too stiff to move any of the joints involved in the action.

"...A Jiang Shi?" Meiling, being from China, recognized the kind of Youkai that was before them. "...I wasn't expecting you to be so thorough with the sorts of Vampires you would teach about..." ...A Jiang Shi is a kind of Vampire? Well, you learn new things every day, huh?

"She's so quiet! I don't hear any thump thump..." Flandre seemed put off by the lack of the sweet tune of the dead girl's heart.

"That's because she's dead, Young Mistress." Meiling said as such matter-of-factly.

"...Where aaaaam I?" The Jiang Shi looked about while speaking in monotone. Well, more like hopped a bit, so as to turn, as her head can hardly turn.

"Ahh, this is the human village, and, to be more exact, my classroom." It was a bit awkward to speak with a corpse, even if she oddly didn't stink like one would expect. ...She was a bit bloated from the summer heat, though.

"...Can I eeeeat you?" The girl began to drool, while still speaking in monotone. ...Why would one ask such a thing?

"Nnno, but, if you teach about your kind of Vampire, I'll give you..." I thought for a moment, before turning to Meiling. "What do they eat?" My voice was hardly audiable.

"Souls mostly, but that one has the power to eat anything, I hear." ...Anything, huh?

"...Give me whaaaat...?" It seems I had confused the corpse, as she had a tired, yet confused, expression upon her face.

"Five Kilos of things to eat." Had to word that just right.

"...Ohh booooy, I love 'thiings'." Her voice had remained a monotone with every phrase, and her arms still out infront of her, as though she simply was unable to sound any other way, or lower her arms.

"W-well, would you like a seat? You look like you could use a rest..." She looked like she was about to keel over! ...Actually, as she's dead, she just might...

"...I'll staand; I'm not able to beeeend my baack." I wonder why that is? "I've got a baaaad case of rigor mortiiiis." ...Well, that explains it.

"I could help with that!" Flandre had a myschievous grin upon her face.

"...Reeeeaally? ...Do teeell." While her interest was piqued, the Jiang Shi still spoke in monotone.

"N-now, Flan... Don't break the poor thing...!" Meiling seemed warry of letting the little Vampire do as she spoke of.

"Don't worry, Meiling! I'll be gentle~!" Flandre skipped over to the stiff corpse, intent of helping.

"...Whaaat is it you plaa-" Flandre jumped up, and hugged the torso of the corpse, while using her legs to hook behind each of her upper thight, and instantly bend the stiff muscles of her back and thighs into that of a sitting angle. "...That huuurt a looot..." A single tear escaped the Jiang Shi's eye.

"There! All better!" Flandre hopped down with a grin of victory.

"...Are you... okay...?" Meiling didn't seem so convinced that her fellow countrymen had been helped.

The Jiang Shi slowly straitened her back back out. "...I don't remeeember the last tiime I was able to bend my baaaack..." The girl seemed happy, even if she didn't sound it.

"...'S that so..." Meiling thought a bit on this for a moment, before coming to a conclusion. "Hey, want help with bending the rest? With my help, it'll probably hurt less!" Meiling now had a way to pass the time before class, should the corpse accept.

"...Suuuure, I like this... flexability thiiing." The girl smiled slightly, while still maintaining the usual monotone.

"Yay!" Flandre seemed happy about being able to do things other than break people for once. "My name's Flan, what's yours? !" Flandre had a happy little grin stretched across her features, and held out her hand so as shake hands with the corpse she now felt a bit of a bond with.

"...The naame's Yoshikaaaa." Yoshika bent her now working, yet sore, back muscles, so as to connect hands. After contact was made, Flandre took it the rest of the way by helping her new friend move her shoulder a bit.

"Nice to meet you, Yoshikaaaa!" Flandre, ignorant to the pattern that was Yoshika's way of speaking, took the way she said her name at face value.

"...Drop the extra aaa at the eeeend." Yoshika couldn't help but make a few gasping sort of sounds, which was as close to a laugh as she could pull off.

The rest of the hour was spent causing Yoshika excruciating, yet needed, pain. By the end, she could actally walk which was utterly new to her, as she was without any memories of her life. However, she still preffered to hop.