|Mishpokhe or Something Short of Amazing
Author: Zarafla Kirtan-Pherrin PM
We all know the family life of Max, PJ, and many others, but what do we know of Bobby Zimmeruski's family? Perhaps he had a lot of sisters, and quite the strict family... Is that why he acts out, wears his hair in a mohawk, and acts the unconventional Jewish son? One-Shot.Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor/Family - Words: 2,960 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 05-28-12 - Status: Complete - id: 8157927
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A/N: All characters within belong to Disney. Unless they're characters you've never heard of before, then they are mine. R&R like always and enjoy!
Mishpokhe (or, Something Short of Amazing)
He was speeding down the concrete half-pipe, as cheers rang around him in torrents.
He did a one-eighty spin in mid-air, and coolly landed-only to race back down the other side. He put on another burst of speed and headed towards the metal railing a hundred feet away in the arena.
He knew that this was his greatest test of agility, skill, and stamina. He had to win. He had to win that gold medal; beat the Skate Park Olympics. If he did, she would find him too irresistible to say "no" to him when he asked her out...
He zipped dexterously between the other competitors and rode a Launch into the air. As he flipped over, his hands grasped the cold metal and pulled off an amazing hand stand, just before he put one hand behind the other and "walked" himself upside down to the other side of the railing.
The judges, from what he could see, stared at him open-mouthed. He instinctively knew that would earn him crazy points. Laughing wildly, he charged at the tallest quarter-pipe in the arena and quickly overcame the steep climb. Grabbing onto a pole at the top, he pushed himself off the edge, racing backwards. He eyed the railing that ran down the quarter-pipe and jumped on it. Doing a backwards Alleyoop Mizou, he couldn't help but grin when the cheering only got louder.
When he spun a three-sixty right off the railing and landed expertly onto concrete, he felt as if the spotlight was completely on him. Even the other competitors stopped to watch.
Finally, as there was only thirty seconds left on the clock, he jumped down a flight of stairs, spun around the entirety of a full pipe, and finally, approached The Dip. The Dip was a Bowl cut into the concrete, but with a little twist... At the very bottom of The Dip, a Cradle stood out in the middle as a testament of one's ultimate skill. No one had ever been able to master The Dip, not without injuring themselves inside the Cradle first because of their lack of control and speed from the initial push off into The Dip.
Usually, Cradles were seen on the edges of Pools and Bowls, but not inside one. Not like this one.
This was it... His final challenge...
Taking a deep breath, he went over the edge. The crowd immediately quieted, holding on with bated breath, as he headed inside the Cradle. Looking as if he had lost control, he spun dizzyingly inside, occasionally touching the outer rim of the Cradle with a stray wheel. With a sudden, collective gasp, the crowd watched, mesmerized, as he managed to glide himself along the back wall and dislodge himself from it. He strode out into the openness of The Dip, his arms spread wide before him.
The reaction from the crowd and the judges was astounding! Not only did he manage to conquer The Dip, but he was the youngest competitor to win the Skate Park Olympics!
He was immediately thrown onto everyone's shoulders as the crowd had rushed themselves from the stands. The judges gave him perfect scores and presented a gold medallion on a blue ribbon lanyard. He looked out into the crowd and saw the face of the one he was most anxious to see. She stood there, her brunette hair whipping in the wind, her purple-tinted glasses magnifying her amazing amber eyes, and her metallic smile wide with braces and flanked with the most sensuous lips he had ever seen. She seemed to have forgotten her lilac coat and white hat, in favor of sporting a red tank top and a deep brown skirt that complimented her eyes. She cheered on with them, positively beaming. He reached out his hand to her.
As she settled on some shoulders next to him, holding hands, he thought this day couldn't get any better. He thought he even heard the crowd chant his name as he started to lean down to kiss Stacey.
"BOBBY! BOBBY! BOBBY! BOBBY! BOBBY! BOBBY!...
...Bobby... Bobby! Bobby, wake up!" Came an anxious pounding on his bedroom door.
"Wha-" He yawned, jerking awake. He ran a hand through his limp orange mohawk, stretching, before falling back down in his bed with a muffled thump.
"Bobby! Get up this instant!" A woman called on the other side of the door, the doorknob jerking back and forth futilely. It was locked. "Well, don't shlep around all day! You have chores to do!"
He grunted unintelligibly.
"I mean it! You get yourself out of bed, Robert Abraham Zimmeruski, or I'll have your father come and get you!" Footsteps lead away from his bedroom door and pounded down a flight of stairs.
Bobby groaned with annoyance and begrudgingly lifted himself out of bed. Looking outside his window, he saw a faint red and orange light peer over the horizon.
Trust his mom to wake him at the crack of dawn.
He had just graduated high school yesterday, partied all the way until three in the morning at Max's house with Max and PJ, and dragged himself back home a block away. He figured his mom would at least let him sleep in on his first day of freedom, but somehow, in the back of his mind, he knew that it wouldn't happen. Not in this house.
Bobby stretched one more time and threw on a pair of shorts over his black cotton boxers and a yellow t-shirt over his bare chest. Unlocking his door, he made his way down the dark hallway and down a flight of carpeted stairs. Down another hallway, he could smell the aroma of fried Gifilte fish and boiling beets from the kitchen, accompanied with rapid chopping from the large knife his mom usually wielded when preparing meals throughout the day.
Passing through the doorway, he stepped into the wooden floored kitchen.
Shai Zimmeruski was a plump woman with a lot of dark curls that reached the small of her back and a generous amount of curves. She shared Bobby's green eyes and his high cheekbones, but she hardly smiled. Other than that, they didn't share any traits. He looked more like his dad.
The overwhelming smell of freshly cut onions wafted over to him from the cutting board, where his mom was standing.
"Good morning, Mom." Bobby yawned, rubbing his eyes.
He never wore his sunglasses inside the house, knowing full well that his mom would yell at him for it. She already had a daily anger attack on him for keeping his hair the way he did.
"Cut your hair, Bobby! You're looking more like a boyan every time I see you!" She snapped as she sidled over to the boiling pot on the stove, picking up a wooden spoon to stir the contents. "Are your sisters getting up?"
"I don't know," he sighed, sitting down on one of the six stools around the kitchen island, which was covered in plates of sambusak sitting alongside olives, mounds of kelsonnes, and layers of atayef covered in honey. A bowl of dates, pomegranates, figs, grapes, and olives sat on a far corner, flanked with a clear dish carrying fresh stalks of wheat and barley.
"Oy vey!" Shai yelled, exasperatedly, as she threw down her spoon and started flipping the fish in the pan. "Well, go downstairs and check. I already have enough up here to do without looking after everyone, making sure they don't turn out to be shlemiels!"
"Don't plotz, I'm getting to it." He replied, the Yiddish word sounding odd coming from his lips. Bobby pushed back his chair and left the kitchen.
Down the darkened hallway again, he turned right and headed down a long staircase into the gloom of the basement. Although he would get personal wake up calls from his mom, she always left it up to him to wake up his three sisters, one of which was much older than he was and the other two being younger... and twins.
Sheri, the oldest child, was one year away from getting her master's degree in Biology, striving to be a high school Biology teacher. Giovanna and Suzannah-more commonly known as Gio and Suzy-would be starting their Freshman year in high school next semester.
He approached the first door on his right and knocked. "Gio! Mom wants you to get up!"
No response. He tried the doorknob, but like his was, it was locked.
"Come on, Gio!"
He pounded the door a little harder.
"Hey!" Came the distant yelling from his mom upstairs. "There's no need to be breaking down doors, Bobby!"
He quieted his knocking.
"Alright, alright! I'm waking up!" Came a disgruntled yell from the other side.
The door popped open to reveal a busty, curvaceous girl with long, curly raven-dark locks and large green eyes. Adorned in nothing but a black nightshirt that barely reached past her thighs, Gio pushed past her older brother on her way to the bathroom across the basement's main room, stifling a yawn.
"Mom won't like you coming upstairs like that." He pointed out, as if in ritual.
"Bite me!" She slammed the door behind her.
It was the same as every morning. Gio was a pain in the ass when she first woke up, but the easiest, so he didn't mind dealing with her first. Bobby made his way over to Sheri's door and proceeded with the same method.
"Sheri, Mom wants you upstairs!"
"Go away... Bobby..."
"Mom needs you to get up! We have chores to do!"
He heard her characteristic snore bounce off the walls. Sighing with frustration, he opened the door. She lay spread-eagle on her stomach in a set of checkered cotton pajamas, her long orange hair twisted and tousled in knots. Her bedspread, sheets, and pillows looked to have been kicked off onto the floor while she slept, half-covering her open laptop, the cursor blinking as if waiting for the next line for her end-of-term essay.
He approached her bed cautiously and shook her shoulders.
"Come on, Sheri. Mom's going to hurt us both if you don't wake up."
Bobby dodged a sudden swing of her fist coming at him.
"I'll hurt you if you don't leave me alone!" She screamed, rolling onto her back.
Sighing again-this time with resignation-he rolled his eyes and grabbed onto her ankles, pulling her off the bed and onto the floor.
"WHAT THE HELL, BOB-"
He didn't stop there. He continued to drag his older sister across the floor, through the hallway, and up the stairs. She clawed at him, trying to reach him with her fists, as her aching back hit every step on the way.
Nonchalantly, he dragged her skidding across the kitchen floor and dumped her against the island. Their mom looked up at the bizarre scene as Sheri spat every profanity she knew within her vocabulary at Bobby, who was already heading back downstairs.
"Hey, wake up Suz-" He heard a crash and a frantic whisper this time when it came time to wake up Suzy, usually the hardest of the three to awaken. The other side of this door became very quiet.
Narrowing his eyes in suspicion, he opened the door.
A girl who looked much like Gio, except she was less curvy and had disheveled short black hair, bounded in front of the threshold, wearing a white bathrobe.
"Hi Bobby!" She smiled in her most charming way possible. "Sleep well last night?"
"I did, too! Say, could you tell Mom I'll be up there in a minute? I've got to get dressed."
As she started pushing him back out the door, he noticed a large shadow hiding behind thick woolen curtains in front of the window well. Suzy's alarm clock sat on the floor, indicating what had made the crash.
"Who is that, Suzy?" Bobby accused, wrenching himself from his sister's grasp.
"I-It's nothing! Just my floor lamp, that's all!"
"Since when did floor lamps wear shoes?"
He pushed past her and wrenched the curtain free, revealing a guy that was Suzy's age, in a ripped t-shirt, faded jeans, worn sneakers, and a black beanie covering his short brown hair, who looked as if he was going to wet himself.
"Who are you?" Bobby snapped, ready to punch the guy's lights out.
Suzy ran in between them. "Bobby, don't!"
"Why are you hiding a guy in your room?"
"Please don't tell Mom, Bobby! I swear nothing happened last night between me and Greg!" She pleaded. "He just needed a place to stay the night!"
Moments passed. No one breathed a word as Bobby glared dangerously at Greg.
Bobby shoved the boy away with disgust. "Get out of here, now, before I change my mind."
The kid opened the window deftly and started climbing out of the window well. "Call me-" Suzy called after him, who was immediately pushed away from the window.
"You come near my sister again, and I'll kick your ass!"
He closed the window with a derisive snap, starting to regret letting him go. "Get upstairs. Mom wants us to do chores."
"I don't wanna do chores!" Suzy yelled at his back.
Bobby turned around, getting in her face. "Unless if you want me to tell Mom that you had a guy in here last night, you'll get upstairs."
"You don't have any proof." She seethed in an undertone.
"He does now!" Cheered a sing-song voice from the bathroom. Gio walked out with a smug look on her face, dressed in faded jeans, a green tank top, and sandals. Her dark hair was pulled back in a braid. "I'll be a witness!"
"You bitch!" Suzy vaulted at her, trying to grab a hold of her. Gio stuck out her tongue and ran upstairs, her sister chasing after her.
Bobby sighed and headed upstairs after them. This was going to be one hell of a day...
Back upstairs, and in the kitchen, he watched as their mom continued to move the onions in the large pot with a wooden spoon as she yelled at Gio and Suzy, while Sheri sat down at the island, drinking coffee, and not paying any attention.
When Suzy began tugging at Gio's hair, and Gio shook Suzy from the collar of her robe, Shai dropped her spoon and physically wrenched them apart.
"A broch! Both of you--A SOF!"
"But she is-"
"ENOUGH! Get to your chores before I smack the stupidity out of you!-Suzy, put some clothes on! Are you some sort of shikse?"
Suzy huffed out of the room, storming downstairs.
Bobby was about to sit down at the island, reaching for a honey covered pastry, when Shai smacked the wooden spoon across his hand. "Get to your chores."
He dropped the atayef back on the plate and slouched out of the kitchen. Just then, a man with short orange hair and a closely cropped beard entered the hallway from a distant doorway. He had Bobby's blue eyes and lanky frame, but seemed more hardened in build and was a head higher than he was. He wore a white button up shirt, dark khakis, and dress shoes.
"Morning, Bobby. Seen your mother around?"
Bobby jerked his thumb back into the kitchen, heading to the front door.
"Avrom? Is that you?" Came Shai's obnoxious yell. "Could you start vacuuming the house? My mother will be here any minute and I don't want this house looking like a shtunk."
"Oy vey..." He rubbed his temples. "Just because it's Shavuot, it doesn't mean that infernal woman needs to come over. She's here every holiday..."
"Wait-grandma's coming over?" Bobby curled his lip in disgust.
His mom placed herself at the threshold. "Yes, your bubbe is coming over and I want everything perfect when she gets here." She snapped a glare at her husband. "Avrom, what did I tell you about talking that way about my mother? She'll be most upset if she ever heard you-"
"She's always upset, no matter what I do." His father retorted. "I can't please that old, cranky yente! And she won't ever hear me speak this way, not unless you say something."
Bobby closed the front door, cutting off a sharp remark tumbling from his mom's lips.
His grandma was a yente. Not to mention, a cranky one at that. She often fussed at his dad, his mom, Gio, Suzy, him... The only person that received preferential treatment was Sheri.
He knew he wasn't going to be able to hang out with Max or PJ today. Bobby went to the garage and lifted the door upward. Next to the old beater car, there was a battered lawn mower. He made a grab for it.
Just then, he heard a smash of glass from within the house and frantic, borderline hysterical shouting. He just shook his head, smiling, as he pulled his sunglasses over his eyes.
This was Mishpokhe.
A/N: A one-shot of what Bobby's family could be like. :) Tell me what you think!