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Wilson and Watson: A How to Guide for AntiHeroism
Author:
CrosserX PM
Meet Abby Watson. Cousin of Mary-Jane Watson. Abby has a minimum wage job, a jerk of a boss, and a crazed killer after her. Meet Deadpool. Deadpool is a Merc-gone-detective, doing some odd jobs on the side. Like protecting Abby Wilson from a crazed killer. What more do you want? Guest starring Spider-Man, Wolverine, and the rest of the Avengers! Yahootie!
Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 13,704 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 63 - Updated: 02-24-13 - Published: 06-10-12 - id: 8203958
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Abby slammed down a pile of books on her desk.

She looked around her new class room, at the high schoolers looking at her. She put her hands on her hips and walked around. She pointed at five different kids. "You, you, you, you and . . . you. Up front."

The kids looked confused, but went and stood in front of the class.

"Write your names on the board."

They did as they were told, and then turned back to Abby.

"William Shakespeare," she said. "What did he write?"

"Romeo and Juliet?" said the girl up there.

"Good," she said. "Put a point under your name. What else did he write?"

"Julius Caesar," said a boy matter of factually.

"Good, good. Point for you. Hmm . . . The Witch of Blackbird Pond?"

The class continued like this for a while, until an uppity looking girl in the first row raised her hand. "Are we just playing games in class?"

Abby raised an eyebrow. "Would you rather be doing book work?"

The girl sat up straighter. "It would help us prepare for more tests."

"I'm not usually the test giving type, but . . ." She looked around the room. "Just because of her we'll have a 50 question test with a written essay tomorrow."

The class groaned and moaned, and Abby smiled. "Just kidding!"

They all laughed, and Abby leaned against her desk. "Seriously, though. Be prepared to start reading Much Ado About Nothing tomorrow."

The bell rang, and as the class flooded out, Peter jogged in. He shut the door behind him and pulled the blinds down. Then he started unbuttoning his shirt.

"Buy a girl a drink first," Abby said, crossing her arms and leaning against the chalkboard.

"Ha," Peter said, ripping his pants off, revealing his Spider-Man suit. He took his clothes and shoved them into Abby's bottom desk drawer.

"Where are you going?" Abby asked.

"Downtown," Pete said. "Doc Ock is causing trouble. Listen, I need you to cover my last class, 'kay?"

"What?"

"I left them a note, they'll come here. Just make them read a book, or something. Noelle is down the hall and to the left if you need her." ***

There was a knock on the door, and Peter pulled his mask on and opened the window, swinging away.

Abby sighed and opened the door, letting her class and Peters flood her room.

"Wheres Mr. Parker?" One of his students asked.

"Family emergency," Abby said.

"But . . . aren't you his wife's cousin?"

Abby blinked. Damn kids. "I don't like this particular family member."

At that moment, there was an explosion. Abby was thrown back against the wall.

Dazed, she blinked open her eyes, and she coughed. Rubble and dust filled the air, and Abby straightened herself up. "Out!" She yelled at her students. "Get out!"

They did as they were told, some screaming and running from the room.

A tall, blonde teacher shoved her way through the wave of students and slid to a stop in the classroom. "What's going on?"

"I don't know!" Abby said. "The wall blew up."

"Ah, you've got to be kidding me," the teacher said, shrugging her jacket off and rolling her sleeves up. "Right in the middle of a test. This is just fantastic."

"You must be Noelle."

"Yeah. You must be Abby." Noelle turned as something landed at her feet. Frowning, she picked it up. It was beeping and blinking. "Aw, sh-"

It exploded, and Noelle was thrown backwards with such force that she went through the wall.

"Oh my God . . ." Abby scrambled backwards as the dust cleared, and a long, psychotic laugh rang out.

Abby squinted and shielded her eyes from the sun with her arm. A green figure loomed in front of her; it threw something, and it rolled towards Abby, some kind of powder was coming out of it.


Mary Jane shoved the door to Wilson Detective Agency open. "You son of a bitch," she said, shoving the lamp on Wade's desk over.

Wade frowned at his desk. "Uh, yeah, I just cleaned in here."

"Do you know what happened today, Wade?" MJ asked, planting both hands flat on his desk. "The Green Goblin got Abby. At school. You're supposed to be watching her!"

"What about Peter? And Noelle?"

"Peter got called away on a wild goose chase to distract him from Abby, and Noelle is being removed from a wall right now!"

MJ started pacing. "God only knows what that sick bastard is doing to her right now. He could be torturing her!" She wrapped her arms around herself. "I can't even imagine what kind of hellhole he has her locked up in . . ."


Abby opened her eyes, gasping. Her head spun for a moment from sitting up so fast.

She looked around. She was in a huge, feather bed, surrounded with cushy pillows and a soft down comforter. The room she was in had a beautiful antique desk and bookshelf, and was painted a light mint green with a white polished floor.

Sitting up, Abby bid her head to stop spinning. Finally, she stood, and shakily walked to the door.

It was unlocked, and she stumbled out into the hallway. She made her way to a lovely living room, but she couldn't make it any further. Her knees shaking, she collapsed onto the white leather couch.

"Headache, Miss Watson?"

Abby slowly looked up, and saw a face looming over her. She recognized the face as Norman Osbourne.

"What, do you want?" she breathed.

"I must apologize for your current state," he said as he sat across from her. "I had to put you to sleep. Don't want you seeing where we are."

"I can barley see anything." Abby lifted her hand to rub at the blurriness in her eyes, but the action proved to much. Her hand fell back beside her.

Norman chuckled. "I may have sprayed you with too much."

"Why are you doing this?"

"Let me explain. I have had a problem with the Spider-Man since . . . well, a very long time. I've wanted to create something, something that would be able to hurt him without him hurting them back. The obvious choice was your cousin Mary-Jane. But she's far too weak. She would never make it through the transformation. But you, you're much stronger than her. You could defeat Peter Parker, with my help." He leaned down in front of her, holding a syringe full of a green liquid. "I'm going to inject you with this new serum I have developed. It will give you the powers you'll need to defeat Spider-Man. After I'm sure your powers will work, we'll have to . . . well, work some things in your mind. New concepts, things like that."

"I hope that you choke and die."

"Now, is that polite?"

He removed the cap from the syringe. "Now, hold still. This will probably sting a good bit."

"Physician, heal thyself!" Norman was suddenly thrown across the room. Deadpool stood there, a bazooka in his hand.

"Are you alright?" Deadpool asked.

"No!"

"Good." He picked her up and spun around, running for the door.

There was an angry yell from Osborne, and then Deadpool felt Abbys body jerk.

"Abby?" He said as he ran from the building. "Abby, what's wrong?"

"My back. My back is on fire."

"What? Why?" He jumped rooftops until he was at the Avengers Tower, where he dropped down through a shaft and into the living room.

"Wade? Wade, my back! My back!"

Wade shook his head and turned her on her stomach on the couch. "Sweet salami on a stick."

"Master Wilson?" Jarvis asked. "Is everything alright?"

"Would I be talking about sweet salami if it was?"

He pulled his mask off, and Jarvis looked away.

The syringe Osborne had had in his hand was in Abbys back.

He plucked it out, and Abby screamed.

"What's going on in here?" Peter, MJ, Tony, Steve, and Jessica all ran from their bedrooms in their night clothes.

"Oh my God," MJ said, dropping down beside Abby. "Oh God. Pete, she's burning up. We need a doctor. Someone call Hank McCoy!"

"I'll get him," Steve said, running off.

"Abby? What happened?" MJ asked.

"This happened!" Deadpool held up the syringe.

"What is that?" Tony asked.

"Some kind of super serum. He injected her with it."

"Is she going to be okay?" MJ asked.

"I don't know," said Tony. "I need to analyze it as soon as possible. Jarvis, take this down to the lab for me please."

"Yes, sir."

"Abby?" MJ said. "Can you hear me?"

"I'm in pain, I'm not deaf."

"Well, at least she's still acting like herself," Peter grinned.

*** Read about Noelle a.k.a. Shadowshine in my Daredevil fanfic "Shadows Shine on the Devil".

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