|As Muggles Say: The Heart Wants What It Wants
Author: TheAvengingAngelsAreHere PM
Hogwartvengers AU. Clint loves life, his friends, Hogwarts in general. The only problem is the girl he loves, Natasha, hates him. After an encounter this all changes, and everything he loves is threatened by the rise of a Neo-Death Eater group, led by Loki. Through the sadness and fear, Clint begins to grow closer to Natasha. Eventual Clint/Natasha, Loki/Natasha briefly, Steve/TonyRated: Fiction M - English - Romance/Angst - Hawkeye/Clint B. & Black Widow/Natasha R. - Chapters: 26 - Words: 73,501 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 10-21-12 - Published: 08-20-12 - Status: Complete - id: 8448284
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A/N Alright so this is the chapter I'm so excited for you guys to read. It's quite dark at the start. I have to warn you. Like...okay you've read what I'm capable of. I've written some dark stuff already. But this and the next chapter are the darkest it gets.
So enjoy! (With that warning) and enjoy your surprise at the end!
I Owe You Everything
Loki sat in the basement of the manor, watching Barton struggle. The paralyzing curse had just about worn off, and Loki had just finished chaining Clint to the wall. He smirked, happy that he was finally winning. That he would finally be exterminating the pest.
Clint pulled against his binds, trying to get free, "Loki. Stop this," He pleaded, tugging at his wrist. Now that the spell had worn off, Clint was free to squirm. The chains were too strong though, "Merlin." He panted, his eyes widening as he watched Loki snap his beloved wand, "Please!"
Loki tossed the wand into the fireplace, watching it go up in flames. He smiled deviously, obviously satisfied as the wood split and crackled.
Clint watched helplessly as his wand got tossed in the fire, "No!" He looked at Loki with a pained expression. "Stop please."
"Stop? You wish me to stop? The fun has just begun, though," He laughed maniacally. He loved the sounds of his begs, but turning them down was almost as great. He pulled his wand up to Clint's neck. "Now then, what first?" He trailed the tip of the wand along Clint's collarbone, before resting it under his chin.
"Fine. Just…get it over with. Kill me," He whispered, daring to meet the Slytherin's maniacal gaze. His breathing became slightly more erratic though.
"Like I would ever make it that easy for you. I intend to watch you die slowly, painfully. You're going to wish you met your end like that pathetic teacher!" Loki smirked, knowing that every word harmed Clint, as much as the spells would.
"He was not pathetic!" Clint snapped, wanting to defend Coulson's honour, "You're a monster, you-"
"Crucio," Loki hissed, the red sparks from the wand lighting up his crazed features.
Clint's defence was cut off by the curse, white hot pain coursing through his vains. "Stop!" He shouted.
Loki grinned happily, letting the curse flow out of his wand for a few more seconds before halting it. "You were saying?" He asked sarcastically, pacing around in front of him just to assert his dominance.
Clint panted, his hair sticking to his forehead, "Coulson was ten times the wizard you'll ever be," He spat, trying desperately to get free.
"You are not helping yourself at all, Barton, spitting your pointless words at me. He plunged a tight fist into his midsection, digging it in deep. The fist connected with his already sore ribs and Clint had to bite down on his lip hard to suppress the scream, "No. I am not dying a coward," Clint replied.
"Beg to die," Loki instructed, removing his fist and sending another crucio his way.
Clint couldn't help but scream in that, the pain almost overwhelming. It was like nothing he had ever experienced before.
"Born a coward, die a coward," Loki chanted, putting a little more heart into the curse, not stopping for anything.
Clint shook his head, "Not...a...coward," He said through gritted teeth, before letting out another scream.
Loki lowered his wand, "I don't know, is crucio painful enough? Perhaps I should slash you, drain you of blood with Sectumsempra, and as you slowly die, I'll aid the process with a few more crucios. How does that sound?" He taunted.
Clint shuddered, slumping forward in his chains, "Why are you doing this? What have I possibly done?" He asked weakly.
Loki glared at him, "Crucio," He snapped, wanting to shut Clint up. Loki wasn't really sure himself. Perhaps it was the Mudblood thing. Or maybe because he stole Natasha from him. There were many reasons really. He couldn't help but laugh coldly, as Clint whimpered at the spell.
One of Loki's minions ran in, "Loki! We have a problem!" He shouted. Loki groaned and cancelled the spell. "Thor is here. Along with others." He spat, casting a disgusted look at Clint, who lay panting hard, trying desperately not to break down.
Loki sneered. "Damn them all. They'll ruin everything. Go ahead first, tell the others not to hesitate to kill," Loki instructed fiercely. He turned back to Clint with a smile as his minion ran out. "Looks like your friends have decided to tag along. They make this easier and easier," He grinned, sending another painful curse his way and turning to the door. "Don't go anywhere, promise?" He asked sarcastically over his shoulder.
"No," Clint whispered, panicked at the idea of his friends in trouble. They could all get tortured of killed, "Fuck you," was all he could reply before screaming again as another curse came his way. The door slammed shut and he took a deep, shuddering breath.
Clint bowed his head, squeezing his eyes shut as he tried to think up the best memories of life. He wanted to die happy. Thoughts of his childhood, parents and brother sprung to mind. Seeing the circus for the first time, watching the amazing archers and being inspired to take archery lessons. Then the day his Hogwarts letter came, and the visit from Coulson. He was so delighted when he discovered he was a wizard. Then he focused on his friends, focusing on all of them, Steve, Tony, Thor, leading up to his best friend Bruce. The shenanigans they got up to, and helping the boy come out of his shell. He swallowed as he finally allowed himself to think of her, "Tasha," He breathed, thinking about how close they had gotten. At least he could die knowing she didn't hate him. That maybe, just maybe, something could have happened. But it never would. He was content, knowing that she cared for him. Part of him just wished that he could have spoken to her, the last time he saw her. That he could have said goodbye.
Natasha hid in one of the rooms as she waited for Loki to pass, knowing she was as good as dead if he found her. The strangled screams were horrific, and now she doubted Clint was even alive. The thought terrified her. She rushed into the hall, making an attempt to pull open the door. Locked. She stepped back, having no time for petty games. She cast a spell that set the door to explode off the hinges, rushing inside once the path was cleared.
Natasha looked around, eyes widening as she saw him chained to the wall. He looked like hell, worse than he ever had before. She was relieved that there was no blood, but then she saw the look in his eyes. The haunted look that could have only resulted from one curse.
"Clint... Oh my god, Clint..." She whispered, rushing quickly towards him. She could feel water in her eyes, a mix of relief and fear. If his condition was as bad as it looked, he would be lucky to be around still. "I'm so sorry, I should have stopped them before all of this happened..." She worked quickly to release him from the binds, kneeling beside him.
"N-Natasha?" He whispered, struggling weakly against his bonds, "Am I dead?" He asked, unable to comprehend how she got here, and why. Maybe she was an angel. Here to take him away. He slumped forward further when the restraints were removed.
"No, you're not dead," Relief was evident in her tone, and she pulled him into her arms to keep him from falling. "I'm so sorry," She rested her chin on top of his head, her cheeks wet. She blamed herself for this. If she was more powerful she could have stopped them.
"Tasha, you're really here?" He breathed, his arms shakily wrapping around her waist, burying his head in her hair, "Don't apologise. It wasn't your fault." He shuddered a little.
"Yes. I'm here. It was my fault. I was weak, and I let you go," Natasha mumbled, squeezing her eyes shut. She felt him shake in her arms, and right now she was honestly just happy he was alive. If she had lost him, the guilt itself would have kill her.
"You couldn't have done anything. They would have hurt you too," He stared up at her with wide eyes, "And I'd rather go through years of torture than know that you were going through one second of similar pain," He stroked a hand through her hair, seeing the tears in her eyes.
Natasha shook her head. "Don't say that, ever, okay?" She whispered, stubborn as always about the matter. "I would never wish this on you. I care about you too much..." She continued to hold him close.
Clint clung to her, shaking his head a little, "It's the truth," He stared down into her eyes, her green ones filled with fear, his own grey pain-filled, "No, and of course you wouldn't. You're a good person," He whispered, "And I care about you so much too. Far too much. More than I care about myself,"
Natasha couldn't find the words to say, for a moment wanting to stay in his arms forever. She knew they couldn't, though, it was far too dangerous for him to go without medical care. She gave him a gentle squeeze before releasing the hug, staring up at him and locking eyes. "We need to get you out of here." She stated, still holding him up.
"I know we do," Clint nodded, before resting his forehead against hers. "Your eyes are kinda red, surely pain-in-the-ass Barton isn't worth crying over?" He let out a weak laugh.
Natasha automatically reached to wipe her eyes, but their foreheads were already touching. "It's dust.. This place, it's just really old and dirty," She said, obviously making an excuse. "You are a huge pain in the ass, though."
Clint shakily reached up to brush a tear away with his thumb, stroking her cheek, "Yeah...yeah it is," He allowed, knowing she was lying, "Thank you for that. Sense of normality."
Natasha managed a smile at that, even through her tears. "Well I didn't want to weird you out with all this niceness..." She whispered, her throat rough, finding herself leaning into the brush of his hand a little.
"No, good idea," He breathed out shakily, dropping his gaze, "Thank you for saving me," He added quietly.
"Consider it payback..." Natasha averted her own gaze. She moved and draped his arm over her shoulder for support. "Come on, you need to get out, and soon."
"You never needed to pay me back," Clint replied, trying to stand on his own, despite his shakiness.
"I will never stop owing you, so it's really worth an effort to make it up," She said quietly, pulling him along the dark stretch of hallway.
Clint paused, leaning against the wall. "What do you mean? Never stop owing me?" He asked, slightly confused.
"You endlessly save me and ask for nothing in return, Clint. Even when I was a massive bitch to you. I called you coward, and a Mudblood and hexed you, and yet you still helped me. Saved me from Loki, and from myself. And then, you changed me for the better. I owe you a debt," She finished, softly carding her hand through his hair.
He shook his head, moving a little closer to her, "You owe me nothing." He said firmly.
"I owe you everything." Natasha's voice was just as firm. This was one battle she wouldn't let him win.
Clint grasped her shoulders, "You don't. Please don't think that way," He pleaded, "I don't want you caring out of...guilt."
"I don't care out of guilt. Not at all," Natasha explained, shaking her head. "This isn't guilt. I care about you because I like you." She finally admitted. "I want to make it up to you. And hopefully I'll find a way to..."
"Well I'm glad," Clint studied her for a moment before taking a step back. "You don't need to make it up to me. Not at all."
Natasha looked at him. "Please. If not for you, then for me. I can't just go on with my life knowing how much you have done for me, yet what I do is nothing in return."
"Look what you just did! You just saved my life!" He exclaimed, though his voice was soft.
"You saved my life and changed it," Natasha retorted. "It could have been anyone here to save you, Thor, Bruce, but you were the only one who changed me, okay?"
"I'm just...content in the knowledge that I saved the one I love. I'm happy," He pulled her into another hug, holding her close, "Knowing you are safe."
Natasha eased into his hug, keeping her grasp on him gentle as he was probably still in a great deal of pain. "I'm safe..." She repeated, here, in his arms, was probably the most secure she had ever felt in her entire life.
Clint pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head, a friendly gesture, "You are," He nodded, trailing his hand up her arm and shoulder.
Natasha's tears blinked to a stop, her managing a small smile up at him. She rubbed her eyes gently on her sleeve, looking back up at him. "Damn allergies..." She kidded, knowing he saw through her lie before.
"Shh...it's fine. My own allergies are threatening to act up," He whispered, running his thumb along her jaw and tracing the shell of her ear. He did have tears in his eyes though.
Natasha smiled lightly, gingerly wiping a single falling tear from his cheekbone. "Don't mock me, Clinton," She warned, though it didn't sound like one at all.
Clint shook his head, "Don't call me Clinton," He whispered, his lips inches from hers. He looked into her eyes, seeing all the emotion she had kept buried and took that as confirmation. He leaned down and pressed his lips against hers. Natasha wasn't the slightest bit shocked from the kiss, his body language screaming his want to before it even happened. Their lips met, and she found her arms snaking around his neck and pulling him gently closer. She was never one to be timid, after all. Clint was relieved that Natasha didn't pull away, and continued to kiss softly. He let her control the kiss, not wanting to scare her off, and was surprised when she wrapped her arms around him. His hands automatically went to her waist and he leaned in closer to her, kissing more firmly.
Natasha slowed the kiss only a little, remembering they were actually in danger here. She pulled away, unsure how she should feel. Sure, the event intensified her feelings for him, but she didn't know if she had taken it too far. She looked at him, their faces still close, his arms around her waist still.
When she pulled away, Clint breathed out, unable to believe that just happened, "Tasha..." He murmured softly, resting his forehead against hers. He didn't want to press the matter, in case she decided it was a mistake.
Natasha was still taking it all in when he said her name. The situation was so unusual, yet it felt so right. Hating a guy one week and kissing him the next wasn't normal, though. "What?" She asked softly, tone curious.
Clint just shook his head in response, "Nothing," He whispered, his lips parted a little as he studied her.
She moved her head away from his slowly, not regretfully. She wouldn't take it back, not ever. "We should really get out of here..." She finally said, moving a hand through her hair. "The rest may need my help, but we can get you back first."
"Yeah. You're right. I'd stay and fight but Loki broke my wand and threw it in the fire," He admitted, annoyed by the fact. "Shit, forgot about that."
"You're not exactly in fighting condition, anyway." Natasha noted, pulling out her wand. She reached for his hand. "Well, you ready?"
Clint accepted her hand, squeezing gently, "I'm ready. How do we-" Clint was cut off when he heard a sharp howl echoing through the corridors. He froze, "No!"
A/N Okay...so I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
I know I was awful and mean and cruel for doing that to Clint. I love him so much and yes that was evil but...I made up for it.
They finally kissed!