Loser in Love: High School Edition

Chapter Six

"Danny, guess what?" says Riley on Friday of the first week back from Spring Break. I shove my books in my locker and slam it shut to turn and look at her. It's hard to look directly at her without feeling butterflies in my stomach, but I try.

"What?"

"Michael Cramer asked me out on a date tonight. Can you believe it? I don't really like him, but he's interested, so I guess I really shouldn't be picky."

"You have a date tonight?"

Riley has a date tonight. I feel a pang of something deep way down deep inside me. It's a burning, boiling, feeling. I really want to throw something.

"That's great," I squeak.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I have to get to class anyway."

I clutch my biology book and head off down a hallway going completely the wrong direction than my biology class. I run into the nearest bathroom and wash my face. I punch the trashcan. A boy comes out of a stall and looks frightened as he washes his hands.

"You're bleeding."

"I don't care."

"Were you dumped?"

"No."

"Did you get a girl pregnant?"

"No!"

"I know, the girl you like is dating someone else."

I look at him and punch the trash can again. The blood gushing from my knuckles is making me feel sick to my stomach. I stick my hand under the automatic faucet. Cold water feels good, but the soap stings a little.

"Do you want to tell the teacher you won't be in class?"

"Yeah, thanks."

I don't even know that guy, but apparently he's in my class. Hey, if he has my back who am I to question him. He grabs his gear and books it out of the bathroom before I turn into the Incredible Hulk. I don't blame him.

I don't go to class. I walk down to the weight room to take my anger out on an unsuspecting punching bag. When that doesn't help I run on the treadmill until my legs hurt, but that is nothing like what I am feeling over Riley.

When my legs can't take it anymore I collapse on the floor. I lay on my back trying to catch my breath and let my heart rate slow down. But my heart's not racing from the work out.

"Wheeler, what are you doing in here?" asks the beefy field hockey coach. She is big through, well everything. It's all muscle. She's probably the only woman around who can kick my ass aside from Riley. I find that arousing and terrifying at the same time.

I sit up. She extends her arm to help me up. She gives me a bottle of water and walks me to a bench. I sit down and chug the water until it's gone.

"Riley has a date tonight," I blurt out.

I have no idea why I told coach. I just sort of slipped out. Coach sits down beside me. She puts a massive hand on my shoulder, gives it a squeeze then hands me a towel to wipe the sweat.

"Do what you need to do, Danny."

"Thanks, Coach."

She gets up, but I don't want her to leave.

"Coach," I say.

"What?"

"What's wrong with me?"

She sits back down. She gives me another bottle of water. She brought three in with her. I guess she was planning on working out too.

"Nothing is wrong you with you, Wheeler. Why do you think something's wrong?"

"Because I have this burning, boiling feeling inside me and I just want to grab Michael and break his neck. I'm not a violent person."

"That's called jealousy, Danny. You're jealous of this boy."

"But I don't want to be because that would mean that I like Riley. I can't like Riley. She's lived across the street from me forever. She torments my brother. She's always been one of the guys."

She gives me a short pep talk about biology and growing up. It's not as awkward as the talk Mom and Dad had with me a couple years ago. This is different.

"Is this going to be a problem, Danny?"

"It already is, I sort of skipped class."

"I meant with field hockey. You're both on the team. Is her presence going to be a problem?"

"I hope not, Coach."

"Well, if you need to talk my door is always open."

"Thanks, Coach. Um, Coach, this conversation never happened."

"What conversation?" She asks smiling.

She writes me a pass to go back to class, but since I am all sweaty we both agree it would be the best option if I showered. The locker room is unlocked because of the boy's PE class. I sneak in and shower before anyone can notice me. I keep fresh clothes in my PE locker in case of emergency. I change into them and head to class.

The bell rings. Biology is over. I wonder what I missed. I spot Riley in the hallway chatting up Michael Cramer. He's a sophomore. He's in the marching band. What could Riley possibly see in that guy besides the fact that he can drive?

I don't bother waiting to talk to her. I just throw my stuff in my locker and grab my backpack for last period. I have math. Maybe I can sit in the back and take a nap, except Riley's in my math class.

"Hey, Danny, what's the matter?" Riley asks.

"Nothing, what makes you think something is wrong?" I ask a little harshly.

"You just seem far away. Look, you don't have to be a jerk."

"Go tell it to someone who cares," I say.

Riley sits in the front of the class as far away from me as she can get. I slam my head down on the desk. When the teacher starts the class I hide my face and hold back the tears that so desperately want to come out.

Dear Diary,

Girl X has a date tonight and it's not with me. I didn't think something like that would bother me this much, but it does. Coach helped me figure out that the boiling feeling deep down inside me is jealousy. Yeah, I'm actually jealous. If that guy so much as tries to kiss Girl X I am going to rip his arm off and beat him with it. She's mine. Well, maybe she's not, but she's definitely not his. I have to do something about this.

The inside scoop from Bonnie Wheeler:

Well, Riley has a date tonight. Danny was not a very happy camper when I picked him from school. He got into a fight with a boy named Michael something. Apparently, this Michael is the one taking Riley out. I swear I am going to have to lock my boys up until the teenage years are over. This is ridiculous. I don't even want to think about how Ben will be. Boys will be boys, as they say.

Song associated with chapter: "Quit Playing Games with My Heart" Backstreet Boys