Disclaimer: I don't own the boosh.

Warnings: A swear word toward the end and it gets a little slashy but nothing too bad...:0

Bored.

Vince was bored. Bored out of hell. Howard had gone out three hours ago to his Jazz exercise thing with Lester, and Vince was bored. He'd spent an nearly an hour on the phone with Leroy slagging off the latest hair braiding craze before he realised that the phone bill cost would mean the he couldn't afford the genuine alpaca wool jumper he'd seen in topshop and he'd quickly hung up. Having wandered around the flat for a bit he had settled on painting but he couldn't find anything to paint and he wasn't in the mood to sit and work at it so he'd walked away leaving it unfinished. Howard had mentioned something about tidying his side of the bedroom but having picked a few things up and stood looking around with them still in his hands he'd then put them back where they were because the prospect of actually having to sort through the piles of stuff scattered around his bed was just too daunting, Vince had gone back to padding around the house mournfully. The Cheekbone Ninja's were on strike over road accidents, far too many were being sued for running into the backs of cars, so there was no magazine to flick through. Vince had even thought about baking before he realised he didn't know how to use the oven. And now he was bored.

Howard always preached that you were never bored until you believed you were. That there was always something to occupy your mind until you thought about being bored and then, and only then, you would not be able to think about anything else and consequentially become bored. However, right now, he could not be doubting his words more. The actually Jazz exercise hadn't been too bad besides the point that they had had a new leader who completely messed up the be-bop warm up, but now, sat opposite Lester in the organic coffee shop he'd insisted they go too, Howard was bored out of his mind. Lester's voice had once again become a dull monotone in the background as he rambled on about the importance of anti hair loss cream, 'for men our age Howard, because healthy hair is key to a healthy lifestyle'. Coming out of anyone else's mouth Howard would have been certain that the last bit was directly quoted from Vince but out of Lester's mouth it was just a bit creepy. Even Lester's monotone would have been ok because Howard could have simply tuned out and thought about something else but every now and again his thought trail would be interrupted by Lester asking his opinion or him slapping Howard a little too hard as he wheezed at his own Joke. And because of this Howard was forced to pay a vague attention and consequentially he thought he might actually scream in a minute.

"Umm... Lester..." He coughed and dragged Lester back to the present "Yeah, umm Lester, much as this has been great I've just realised I've left Vince in charge or a casserole and he can't actually use the oven... So, er, I have to go..." The casserole may have been a slight improvisation but the rest was 100% true

"Course Howard, I understand your needs" Howard wasn't sure he understood Lester's meaning "I'll see you later at the Jazz club Howard, we'll continue this then to the sweet sounds of scat"

"Sure... Bye" Howard walked out before Lester had time to say anything else.

The sounds of the shop door opening Jolted Vince from his thoughts and Immediately he was bored again.

"Vince?" Vince glanced at the clock, nearly two hour's since Howard said he would be back.

"Yeah? I'm up here" Although truthfully he was half way down the stairs by now.

"Hey little man" Howard smiled when he saw Vince

"Hey Howard" Vince hid behind his hair, suddenly and unexplainably shy

"Vince, I-"

"Howard..." The two had quite without meaning too gravitated toward each other and now they were really very close

"Yeah?" Howard breathed, keeping as still as possible like he didn't want to scare Vince into moving

"I... I think I... Oh, fuck it!" He leant in and kissed Howard. Hard. Howard froze before responding, teeth clicking together as they grabbed feverishly, running hands over whatever part of each other's body they could get too. Vince shoved Howard into the wall

"What..." Kiss "Did... you... do...today" Howard managed between kisses. Vince drew back slightly, panting and looked at him incredulously before answering, leaning in so Howard could feel his cool breath on his ear

"Chatted to Leroy, got bored and thought about you. Or rather what I want to do to you."

"Oh, really, and what is that?" Vince pulled further in, arms coiled around Howard's shoulders, Howard's arms around his waist, all tension gone. Vince wispers in his ear, low and seductive. Howard splutters and then giggles in a rather unmanly way. Vince pulled away to look at him and smiles,

"What about you?"

"Oh, the same" He smiles and closes the distance between his and Vince's lips again.

*** -Later that evening –

"Why did we stop doing this?"

"Not sure. Let's not let it stop again though."

"Umm..." Vince leans into Howard as he kisses him, slowly.

"You know, I was meant to be meeting Lester tonight..."

"What again?"

"Yeah, He's as bad as you when it comes to hair talk- even two hours in the coffee shop wasn't long enough for him to convince me never to wash mine ever again."

"You don't mind listening to me though" Vince chuckled, imagining Lester preaching Howard about hair

"Hey!"

"What it's true!"

"Still..."

"Still what?"

"Still nothing."

"Exactly."

"What are we talking about?"

"No clue."

Ok, not sure where that ending came from... It was going to be a fairly short fic... :/ Anyways... yeah... hum...

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