Part two

Delenn is putting on a fairy costume. Suddenly a spooky figure appears. It's wearing a long robe. D

Delenn says, "Argh!"

Spooky figure says, "Delenn! I have returned."

Delenn falls down.

Spooky figure says, "See ya later."

Three kids are sat on a seat. They are dressed as G'kar, Londo Mollari and Delenn. The girl being Delenn is wearing a ballet cardie and a floaty dress. The boy being londo is wearing a black jacket and cheesy broom wig. NL The boy being G'Kar has on a brown Indian costume, with a knife in his hand.

Kid 1 (G'kar) says, "Guess what! G'kar met me. He said I looked an idiot."

Kid 2 (Delenn) says, "Guess what – Delenn spoke to me! She said I looked like an imposter."

Kid 3 says, "Londo saw me. He said I looked terrible."

Kid 2 says, "Yeah. If only they liked our disguises."

G'kar is dressed as an American Indian. Talia is looking at his costume.

Talia says, "I knew that costume was for you. Wait 'til everybody sees the totem pole."

The totem pole looks like a bunch of Centauri. BL Talia laughs.

G'kar says, "Raargh! How am I ever going to live this down?"

Talia says, "You don't like the outfit?"

Na'toth says, "I'm ready!"

G'Kar says, "Na'toth has become a girly!"

Talia says, "I get it."

Na'toth says, "He he he!"

She spins. Her ballet dress may be brown but it looks so silly that anybody would've thought she'd been forced to wear such a thing. WA Then on the Control Centre some guy is looking after all the controls and a man in a cloak is getting closer to the guy. He hits the guy on the head. BOO In the Zokalo the main crew are about. All of a sudden the man in the cloak appears. Everyone steps back.

Sinclair says, "What do want?"

The man lifts up a stick. Sinclair takes a look at it.

The man says, "You will be a fire."

Sinclair says, "I am…" The man zaps him and all of a sudden he really is a fire, with Sinclair's face. "…a fire!"

Man says, "I'm the Rook King."

Sinclair says (looking at his stick), "What is that thing?"

Man says, "Your worst nightmare!"

He zaps a lady in a bat costume. She turns into a bat. G

Sinclair says, "Hey! How dare you come onto my station and start turning people into things!"

Man says, "Remember me…"

He reveals his face to be the man who tried to sell them the aquatic amusements.

Sinclair says, "It's you!"

The man smiles. He lifts up his stick and zaps up. The zap spreads over the station. In the sickbay G'kar suddenly starts behaving like an Indian. TL Talia begins licking herself, like a cat. NL Na'toth grabs a man that's not in costume and starts dancing with him. Talia sees herself shrinking and growing fur. Before long, she's turned into a cat. G'kar runs out into the Zokalo, still behaving like an Indian. Delenn is walking out her quarters when she discovers she can fly. Franklin starts running round aimlessly and Vir realises he can see through himself. He pulls a very scared face. However, as he tries to exit publicity, Garibaldi, alongside a team of firemen, runs into the Zokalo.

Garibaldi says, "Calm down everyone! We're here to put out the fire!"

Vir says (frightened), "Fire!?" After looking, he says, "What fire?" NL

Garibaldi says, "Don't panic! We'll save you!"

Sinclair is about to tell the man off when he teleports away.

Sinclair says, "What did you do?"

He looks around to see a crowd of all sorts of creatures.

Sinclair says, "I think this calls for a staff meeting."

Ivanova runs down the Zokalo, with her wand in hand. She notices that Babylon 5 visitors have started to look like ghosts.

Ivanova says, "What is going on?"

Lennier runs to her.

Lennier says, "Lieutenant Ivanova! Everyone's turning into ghouls and animals. What's happening?"

Ivanova says, "I do not know."

Lennier says, "And my wand has started working."

He demonstrates and then finds he's turned Ivanova into a Centauri. G She pulls out a mirror and then nervously laughs. The laugh fades into angry laughter and then growls. BL Susan gets out her wand and tries to turn Lennier into…well, we'll find out. Lennier shoots back, turning her into a Minbari. Ivanova feels her head and gets really angry. She turns Lennier into a child. Lennier notices his unfortunate shrink and zaps Susan again, turning her into a Narn. Sinclair appears (still on fire) and pulls an incredibly frightened face.

Sinclair says, "Is that you, Mr Lennier?"

Lennier nods.

Sinclair says, "Is that you…um…who is that?"

Ivanova says, "It's me, Susan."

Sinclair says, "You're not going to believe this…"

Scene turns to the staff room…

Ivanova yells so loudly the station quivers, "WHAT!?"

Garibaldi says, "Calm down! I've got the fire under control!"

Londo is sat on a wall, looking even more like Humpty Dumpty. He falls down. G'Kar is doing a silly rain dance.

Ivanova says, "You're saying Mr Irrelevant has come back to get vengeance?"

Sinclair says, "It is the only reason I can think of."

Na'toth is dancing with Lennier.

G'Kar says (doing hand sign), "How?!"

There is a small pause. HL

Sinclair says, "I've not a clue!"

Vir accidentally walks through Doctor Franklin, who's running around with a candle.

Ivanova says, "Where did he get the idea? I mean, you don't go around to someone's station and think, 'How will I get vengeance? I know! I'll turn them into their costume.' It seems Mr Irrelevent has a reason for doing such a crazy thing!" (She pauses.) "So I'm a witch, Lennier's a wizard…both our wands work…speaking of which, could you turn me back?"

Lennier sends a bolt at her and she turns back into a Minbari (!).

Ivanova says, "Thank you. You're a fire…careful, you're scorching the desk!" BL

Sinclair says (moving his arm), "Garibaldi thinks he's meant to put me out…Talia has turned into a cat." (Talia strokes Garibaldi's chair.) "Londo's Humpty Dumpty…" (Vir walks through the desk.) "And we know what Vir is."

Ivanova says, "Wait a minute! Perhaps this madman has an inspiration!"

There is a huge 'crash' and everybody turns to see that Delenn has flown straight into the doorframe.

Delenn says, "Excuse me Commander but I think I'm getting fed up of these wings."

Ivanova says, "I'll search the data files."

Delenn says (to Sinclair), "Who was that?"

Ivanova walks to a computer and searches the net. She turns round to see Delenn, Londo and G'Kar.

Ivanova says, "Delenn, what are you doing here?"

Delenn says, "Um, excuse me, you are never going to believe this of course, but I'm not Delenn."

Ivanova says, "Who are you?"

Delenn says, "Um, actually, I'm called Susie and these are my friends Jay and Robin."

G'Kar says, "We went as the ambassadors for Halloween."

Ivanova says, "…and you became them."

G'Kar says, "Exactly."

The computer yells that it has found files. Susan turns to read them and her face goes white. Back in the staff room, Sinclair is fighting with Garibaldi.

Sinclair says, "Don't put me out!"

Ivanova steps back in the room in the nick of time.

Ivanova says, "You'll never believe what I came across."

She puts a file into the computer. Up comes a very old video of a 90s programme called the Magic Key. We see some of the theme, with Biff and Chip and Kipper doing all sorts of interesting activities e.g. falling down a wormhole, getting zapped, being chased. Then it goes into the episode. Chip and Kipper are dressing up when they, their dog Floppy and their friend Wilma get thrown down a wormhole. They land on a farm where a humanoid rook wearing a cloak and a wizard hat magic's them into their costumes. Kipper is a scarecrow, Floppy is a frog (well, he didn't dress up as one, but the rook king mistook him for one), Wilma is a cat and Chip, who refused to wear a costume, vanished! (They could still hear his voice, they just couldn't see him.) Once the rook king has gone, they meet a scared farmer and make a trap for the rook king. It consists of a net with ropes specially designed to grab hold of rooks, which come down to eat some food they have thrown on the ground. The rook king comes to save his rooks but he trips over and falls in the net. The rooks start flying and carry him away. The kids go home and Chip makes a costume of the rook king.

Sinclair says, "You're thinking he's seen that. The man called himself a Rook King."

Ivanova says, "Is there any better theory?"

Sinclair says, "Do you think if we make a trap for the rook king, as did the kids in the programme, we could get rid of him?"

Ivanova says, "It's the only thing I can think of!"

The Delenn, G'Kar and Londo kids appear.

Delenn 2 says, "Excuse me."

Delenn says, "Gasp!"

Delenn 2 says, "If the rook king goes, will we turn back into ourselves?"

Everyone looks at them before they realise…

Garibaldi says, "I've got a plan."

It's dark on the Zokalo. The man has returned. He takes a few steps forward when he hears laughing.

G'Kar says, "…and the man actually thought his spell was working!"

He laughs unashamedly.

Delenn says, "That man still thinks we're our costumes!"

The man takes a step forth. He can see Delenn has turned from a fairy to a Minbari.

Man says, "Hey! What on earth happened?"

He steps forward. Suddenly he steps in a looped rope, and goes shooting upwards like a star. The three ambassadors (who are, by the way, the three children…heck, this story's starting to blow my brain) immediately stop laughing. The real ambassadors gasp from a place in the corner. Ivanova jumps out of a corner and throws a net to them. The man dangles in the air, struggling desperately. He drops his cane. Little Lennier gets hold of it. The man then all of sudden goes hurtling into the net, screaming. The ambassadors tie it up.

Man yells, "Stop! What have I ever done to you?"

Sinclair says, "You turned my crew into their Halloween costumes." BL

Man says, "Alright! I guess that was a silly question."

Abruptly he cuts his way out with a sword. He jumps up and swings on the rope above him. Sinclair and Ivanova move out the way before he lands near a door. BOO The man goes rushing down a shaft.

Sinclair says, "Oh no."

The man is crawling through a Jeffry's tube.

Ivanova's voice says, "Ah, the rook king. Did I neglect to tell you that we have sealed all ways of escaping the shaft?"

Man yells, "I surrender! I guess I was never cut out to be a children's actor"

Sinclair says, "Children's actor? What on Babylon 5?"

Man says, "I always wanted to swim with mermaids, and dance with fairies. But everybody said I was a nutcase. So I came to Babylon 5, hoping to fulfil my hopes."

Delenn says, "Ow!"

Man says, "What?"

Delenn says, "I flew into a wall!"

Sinclair says, "I demand that you describe to us just what this thing does."

Man says, "My stick? It's a complex DNA reorganiser. I got it off some trader. All you gotta do is give it a tap and you'll make everyone back to normal."

Around B5 suddenly things turn into their own forms. Talia is prowling the zokalo, and she turns back into…Talia. Vir steps out a wall when he realises he's himself. The two skeletons (who now are really thin) become themselves. Sinclair discovers he's no longer a fire.

Sinclair says, "Get off my station and don't come back."

Man says, "OK, I will."

A door opens and the man walks out. He lands in the briefing room. A group of people are stood there. He lets Chief of Security Michael Garibaldi take him away.

Girl (who was Delenn) says, "Hi! I'm back to myself!"

Ivanova says, "Ah! At last! Everything's sorted."

Later Franklin is giving everyone a check-up.

Franklin says (to Talia), "Well, you're in good shape and there's absolutely no side effects."

Talia says, "Thank you, doctor. Wait…I feel a bit…I feel a bit-"

Talia sicks up a hairball.

Talia says, "Yuck." NL

Susan Ivanova starts to sing a different song. (Don't stop me now.)

Ivanova says, "Don't spook me now."

She does a silly dance with all the crew, jumping about.

"We're fighting 'gainst the rook king."

She points.

"We know he will fall. Don't spook me now."

She holds hands with Sinclair.

"If you wanna stop him, you'll have a ball.

"Don't spook me now. Don't spook me me now. Don't wanna spook at alllllllllllllllllllllllll."

Garibaldi says, "Stop the rook king!"

The rook king rushes past. Na'toth, who's dancing past, chases him but ends up tripping over Garibaldi's hose.

G'Kar says, "Are you all right Na'toth?"

Na'toth says, "WHAT AM I DOING IN A BALLERINA'S DRESS?" BL

THE END

Well, maybe not.

El Numbre says, "It is I, El Numbre. I am here to rescue you."

Sinclair says, "Oh no. Not another 90s telly programme."