Author's note: dramione! dramione! dramione! more angst! another letter fic!

Disclaimer: I own nothing here. Characters belong to JK and the lyrics below are from the song 'As it seems' by Lily Kershaw.

tumblr: winchesterwings

Enjoy people!

Well I lost my innocence when in I let him dive
But the way that he looked at me
Made me feel alive
And now I know
Nothin' at all
But the release that comes when you're
In mid fall...

Well in this life you must find something to live for
Cause when the darkness comes a callin'
You'll go back to where you were before

Death: An Introduction

You always said that one day, you would like to see what impact you made on the world. Simple to say: you didn't make an impact on the world; in fact, you besmirched your family name for the rest of your, and probably your children's lives, you almost killed the greatest wizard of all time, and will always be renowned as "Ferret." That is your legacy Mr Malfoy; how does it make you feel?

Honestly, it made me laugh writing that down. And that is saying something because I don't laugh anymore, well, not much anyway. Draco, I don't know how to say this (I suppose, that's why I'm doing it in a letter). On the topic of letters, this will be the only one you get. There is no second letter or third, not even 1.2. This letter is the only letter. I hope, I do sincerely hope, that you get this letter before…never mind. Just visit me after you get this letter alright? No matter where I am, promise me you'll visit me with my favourite flowers in tow (I know that I have to remind you otherwise you just won't bring any).

Draco, I'm dying. This information is general and useless without a greater degree of specificity. It's a known fact that everyone dies eventually (you and I know this well), in one fashion or another, and often against their better judgement. I'm dying and it's against my better judgment. I've avoided death too many times to be considered luck: it has only been a matter of time before Death would find me again. I've got cancer; the doctor's say that it was because of the asbestos from the falling house in my last mission (you read about that in the paper I assume). I'm in the St. Mungo's as I write this. Even wizards don't have a treatment for lung cancer. So I suppose this is it. Death is introducing itself to me, it's not black but white but has iridescent colours surrounding it. He comes to me in my sleep and whispers something that I can never quite remember. I wake up crying.

Ron isn't coping too well. I don't blame though, how would you cope if Astoria told you that she was dying? Ron is trying to hold it together for the kids and I but I see right through it. I can see the tear stains on his cheeks and the bruises on his knuckles. We haven't told the children yet, seeing as Rose is at school and Hugo is just too young to know about thing like cancer. How is Scorpius going at school? Rose spoke quite dotingly of him in her last letter. I sense a budding romance.

Death doesn't scare me, it's leaving people behind. I've always been afraid of that. It's the people that are left behind that suffer the most, not the one leaving everyone. The person that has died is dead, unable to feel anything again but the living (you, Ron and everyone else) are left the grieve. Draco, I know that it has been years since we last spoke but I want you to know that I still love you just as I love Ron. I can hear your attitude from here Malfoy, stop.

I thank God for the life he has given me. The only thing that I wanted in life was do the best that I could and I certainly did that: I saved a generation from Voldemort, I inspired Viktor to continue his Quidditch career, I saved a Death Eater from himself and I loved and was loved in return. My faith was no ill-put with Him. Don't forget your faith Draco, as I have not and nor will He forget you.

Do you remember the moment that you fell in love with me? I remember it vividly: we bumped into each other in London one winter afternoon. It had been two years since we had last seen one another and you had, by all accounts, redeemed yourself. The circus was in town that night, do you remember the flashing lights and music? A gypsy tried to seduce you and then she stole your money while your transfixed on…her, I'm laughing just thinking about it. I still have the ticket stub from the circus, it sits in an old shoe box in the attic. I bring it out every now and then and look at it. The four of jacks will never be the same again, I can tell you that much. I still have that card, you know? Yeah, I do. It sits on my dresser and occasionally, I'll pick it up and twirl it between my fingers. It's faded now and the edges are torn but it's still the same card.

How is Astoria? Ever since she quit working at the ministry, I don't see her as often as I would like. Does she know about us? About you and I? I don't think she would - she is too kind to me, if she had known about our former-passings, I fear that Astoria would not have been as welcoming to me when I first arrived at my job. Speaking of jobs, Draco, how is yours going? Last I heard, you were gearing up to take the position as their boss. Congratulations! A promotion is always welcome and I suppose you cannot complain, what with the recession going on. The more money people have the better these days. You will take the job will you not Draco? I hope you do.

Draco, I love you. Just as I loved Ron. Hey, do you remember that time—