Summary: When Usagi has a heart attack, Misaki realises just how much he means to him.

Disclaimer: Junjou Romantica is not mine. I am not profiting in any way from this story, it is just for fun.

Contains Yaoi, boy/boy. Also please excuse my awful science knowledge. I tried!

Heartache

"Usagi-San I'm home," called Takahashi Misaki cheerfully as he bustled through the apartment door carrying a large bag of groceries. He was met by silence and an array of different sized teddy bears staring at him blankly. Usually upon returning home he would hear the gentle clacking of computer keys, the soft sound of snoring or the shuffling of papers. Placing the bag down at the kitchen counter he called out again: "Usagi-San?"

He must have gone out.

A low moan came from the other room. He stepped into the office. The computer was on, papers littered the floor and among them lay Usami Akihiko.

Good grief...

With an impatient sigh Misaki placed his hands on his hips and frowned disapprovingly at the silver-haired man. Finding Usagi passed out on the floor was becoming a regular occurrence.

"Baka, Usagi! Get up; you're making the place look untidy." Misaki bent down and poked him in the centre of the back, producing another low moan from the older man. "For goodness sake..." With difficulty he managed to turn Usagi onto his back, but as he flopped over, Misaki realised that something was gravely wrong. Those usually seductive violet eyes were glazed with pain, his face was worryingly pale and covered in a glistening sheen of sweat.

Oh no...

He winced. "Ugh... Mi..saki...I can't breathe."

The younger man felt himself begin to hyperventilate, hot tears stung his eyes. "What is it? Where does it hurt?"

"My chest...I think it's a heart attack."

Misaki had warned the older man that this might happen one day if he didn't change his slovenly ways. Sweating profusely, he ran to the other room and called for an ambulance, his voice trembled so badly that he could barely get his words out.

"I think he's had a heart attack, yes he's breathing. Please come quickly!" He returned to Usagi's side and held his trembling hand.

"The ambulance is on its way. Hold on." Heavy lidded eyes began to drift close. "Usagi-San stay with me!"

This was it. He was going to lose him. It seemed to Misaki that everyone was leaving him-first his parents and now Usagi... The thought that he might not ever see this man again terrified him, and he realised that he could not live without his Usagi-San.

"He's stable," said Doctor Toshiro, "but we'll need to keep him in for a few days. He was lucky you found him when you did."

"What caused it?" asked Misaki, clutching onto a cup of coffee that a nurse had given him; drinking it however, was the last thing on his mind.

The doctor inspected Usagi's file. "Stress and smoking."

That makes sense, thought Misaki. Usagi didn't exactly take care of himself.

"As a result his blood pressure was dangerously high, but luckilly the damage to his heart is minimal."

"C...can I see him?

"Yes, but not for too long he needs to rest."

As he entered the ward, Misaki nearly burst into tears at the sight of Usagi-San lying in the hospital bed, connected to a multitude of tubes and wires. He looked so frail, his silver hair matted and ruffled. Sitting himself down by the bed, Misaki took Usagi's hand and massaged the palm gently with his thumb, as if hoping it might bring some life back into him.

"I thought I'd lost you. If you had died I don't know what I'd have done because...because I would never have told you that...I love you."

One lavender eye cracked open. "What did you just say?"

Misaki jumped up. "Yahhh! I thought you were asleep!"

The older man gazed at him from beneath long lashes. "Just resting my eyes. Come here."

Misaki embraced him, being careful not to put too much weight on his chest. It was good to hold him again to feel the heat of his body, though he'd never admit it out loud. Misaki felt him swallow a lump in his throat.

"Misaki?"

"Yes?"

"Did you just say what I thought you said?"

"No, you must have misheard me..." The brunette mumbled into Usagi's shoulder.

"Please," Usagi breathed desperately, "say it again, so I know I'm not dreaming,"

Misaki sighed, This is it, clenched his fists and said in a small but sincere voice, "I love you."

There I've said it out loud and it feels...good.

A shuddering gasp came from the older man's lips-he was crying.

"Usagi-San?" the younger man leant over in concern. "Are you alright?"

"Do you know how long I've waited for you to say those words? It has felt like a lifetime," the older man gasped through his tears, then added with a laugh, "I should have heart attacks more often."

Misaki drew back, fighting the impulse to hit him. "Baka Usagi-San! Don't say things like that! You almost died!"

A week later and Akihiko was well enough to return home. The apartment was filled with gifts which he had received from friends and family; chocolates, cards, flowers and...more teddy bears... For the first few days of being home, visitors came almost daily to visit Akihiko and Misaki was very strict about who came in and for how long. Aikawa-San was the most persistent and Misaki eventually had to push her out the door to get her to leave.

"Usami San is very tired now, thank you for the chocolates, no he won't be making any ammendments to the manuscripts, goodbye!"

"That was a bit rude," snorted Usagi who was carefully selecting which chocolate to eat from the box Aikawa-San had just given him. "I'll need to get back to my writing at some point, I have a career to think of, bills to pay. Besides I have a new idea about two star crossed lovers who finally confess their feelings to eachother in a hospital ward..."

Misaki ignored him and picked up a notepad that was lying on the coffee table. "OK Usagi San, I've made a list. Firstly, no more smoking." He picked up a packet of cigarettes from the coffee table and threw them in the bin, where they landed with a satisfiying clang.

Usagi looked rather pained for a moment, like dog deprived of its favourite chew toy.

"Second, you need to get more exercise."

"I get plenty of excercise with you around," replied Usagi with a suggestive waggle of his eyebrows.

Misaki ignored him, "and thirdly, no more going to bed at five o'clock in the morning."

"But I'm a writer, that's what writers do."

"Not anymore. You can make a proper writing schedule and get your manuscripts to Aikawa-San on time, that way you'll be more organised and less stressed."

The older man ruffled the younger man's hair and laughed gently. "It's so cute that you care about me so much."

"Baka Usagi, of course I do!"

"But you missed out one very important thing on that list." Akihiko put both hands against the wall either side of his lover's head, and leaned so close that Misaki could feel his heated breath tickle his nose.

Misaki blinked his green eyes in confusion. "I...did?"

"Yes."

Misaki swallowed nervously whilst trying to keep his breathing even. He moistened his lips, unaware that doing so made Usagi even more aroused. "What?"

"My daily dose of Misaki."

The younger man paled and gulped. "No...but wait..."

Grinning to himself, Usagi-San craned down to kiss him fiercely whilst sneaking a hand slowly down his lover's chest towards his midriff and began expertly unbuttoning the trousers, pulled down the zip and found what he was seeking.

Misaki gasped desperately feeling the warmth of Usagi's hand against his burning desire and bucked his hips forward. "Ah! don't..."

A single eyebrow arched coyly. "Don't? But you said you loved me. You can't protest anymore Misaki. Tell me you love me."

"I...love you."

"Again," he whispered in the boys ear as he pumped furiously. That soft, deep voice and the waft of heated breath against his neck nearly sent Misaki over the edge. He clutched tightly onto Usagi's forearms. The pressure built steadily until he could no longer hold it in.

"I..."Usagi...I...I love you!" he cried desperately as he came. Dishevelled and panting, he stared up at his lover.

Usagi smiled down at him devilishly. "Still too fast, but that's what I love about you. Now, if you love me as much as you say you do, then show me. Let me feel your love Misaki."

Misaki turned a deep shade of crimson and shakily lowered himself to his knees before the man. He was nervous and a little afraid, but he wanted to do this, to show him how much he loved him, to make him feel good. With fumbling hands he unzipped the older man's fly and after a moment's hesitation, took him in his mouth.

Usagi breathed a trembling sigh of pleasure. "Oh God Misaki...It feels..." His eyes fluttered closed at sensation of his lover's mouth on him for the first time, hesitant, clumsy, but endearing and so good. He rested his weight on the wall behind to steady himself and tenderly ran his fingers through Misaki's silken locks with the other.

"Is...is it ok? Am I doing it right?" asked the younger man with uncertainty. He was just copying what Usagi normally did to him.

"Yes...Misaki... it's perfect. That's it." With a bestial groan he came hard. Misaki swallowed obediently and wiped his mouth with a shaking hand, grinning sheepishly.

That wasn't so bad and Usagi-San looks so happy.

Usagi brought the young man up and kissed him full on the mouth tasting his own essence on those boyish lips, driving him wild.

"That was wonderful Misaki. Say it once more, say you love me," he breathed.

Misaki rolled his eyes. He was never going to hear the last of this now. "I love you." They held each other in a tight embrace for a moment, as they caught their breath. "Usagi?"

"Hmm?"

"Promise me you'll never leave me again."

With a soft chuckle he ruffled Misaki's mop of brown hair. "I promise. Now," he said, his eyes gleaming with anticipation, "where we?" He grabbed the young man by the arm and threw him onto the sofa among the teddy bears and chocolates, before pouncing on him.

"Usagi-Saaaan! You mustn't over exert yourself!"

"But I want too. When it comes to you Misaki, I just can't quit."

The End :) I may write a sequel or decide to extend this story a little if people like it enough, so please show some love and leave a review xx