|In My Life
Author: jillygurl777 PM
First fic ever and my summary is absolute crap but the story is much better promise! For as long as I can remember John Lennon has been in my life, he has been my rock, my consoler, but most of all my brother at heart.Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 15 - Words: 19,031 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 05-13-13 - Published: 01-28-13 - id: 8956879
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
When I got home that night I was greeted by my father passed out on the couch with a bottle next to him and a broken lamp not far away. With a sigh I cleaned up the lamp and I learned my lesson about touching any of my dad's drinks so I left the bottle there. I went upstairs and took a long shower. I usually tried to take a very quick shower and get dressed twice as fast because often times my dads "friends" crash here and try to take a peak and sometimes a grab. But it seems as though the house was empty so I just let the warm water run down my skin and I just shut my eyes.
I thought about what John said to me. I thought about every is single word that came out of his mouth, and just considered what he was saying. Should I leave Josh? I know he probably shouldn't hurt me or sleep around for that matter but I know he loves me, or I think he does at least. You usually don't hurt people you love at such a level. I need to see him so I can sort everything out. Before I make any decisions I have to see him.
The next morning I got up, got dressed and did my hair and make up. I was going to pick up some lunch for Josh and I then stop by his house and talk to him.
I went to a local deli and got us a couple of ham sandwiches and some crisps. I started to make my way down to his house. I let myself in, as I always did by his request, and started to make my way upstairs when I heard moans. I bulleted up the rest of the stairs and swung his door open. He was in bed with another woman.
I knew he did it. I just never wanted to see it. I also thought he only did it when he was drunk and he never went out for drinks before seven it was only noon.
I stood in horror, then I backed my way out of the room and as quietly as I could, shut the door. I decided to stay and talk to him about it. So I went downstairs and waited. It took everything in me not to cry. I knew if I cried I wouldn't be able to stop then be would come down and see me crying, he always got angry when I cried so he would probably just hit me.
When it was finally over I heard footsteps coming down the stairs and then Josh leading whoever that girl was to the door and what he said to her made my insides go numb,
"I missed you so much and that made up for it, can't wait to see you again, I love you"
Now I knew he had not just had sex with other women but he had an ongoing relationship with at least one other. And he loved her.
I went from confused to angry to sad. My confidence is very fragile, I am insecure about lots of things. Lots of my insecurities rooting from Josh's harsh words. But now it just shattered into a million pieces. I am not enough for him, I'm not good enough, that's why he has to get other girls.
Then it hit me. I don't love Josh. He pushed me, hit me, made me feel like a load of shit and on top of that, slept with other women. If I stayed with him much longer I will be ruined, physically and mentally.
I still have had a warm feeling in my heart, an excitement for a long time but it wasn't for Josh it was for someone else, someone who cares about me, someone who would never hurt me, someone I have known all my life; John.
I am in love with my best friend. I guess I always have been but I just hadn't realized it. Thinking about him gave me butterflies when he looked at me my day would become better.
My thoughts were interrupted by a voice,
"Now what the hell do you think your doin' here?" Josh said annoyed
"I have something important to tell you," I said and then took a deep breath
"We'll hurry up and tell me I have stuff going in,"
"I'm leaving you," I said sternly
"No," he responded plainly
"No your not leaving me" he said as if it was the simplest thing in the world
"Yes I am, have a nice life Josh," I said while grabbing my bag and heading toward the door
I was stopped by a firm grip on my arm
"I said your not leaving me and that is what your going to do, so stop being a bitch and listen," he said through clenched teeth.
He was about to strike me but somehow I managed to get free and run down the road. He was gone. I don't have to put up with his abuse anymore. For now at least. I decided to walk and I found my way to a familiar place. Strawberry Fields.
I stepped through the gates and sat down under the same tree I had when I first went there. I closed my eyes and thought about everything and when my thoughts wandered to Josh I started to get very emotional. I felt tears forming in my eyes. Whether they were tears of joy from getting away from him, of tears of sadness from all that he has done to me, I do not know.
I couldn't hold them in much longer and I let out a sob. Then I just went into hysterics when I felt a familiar arm wrap around my shoulders.
I looked up to see John staring down at me with worried eyes. I wanted to reassure him that I was fine so I gave him a weak smile, he still wasn't convinced. So I decided to tell him.
"I left him,"
He looked greatly relieved then he pulled me into the biggest hug on the planet and kissed the top of my head.
That's another reason why I love John so much, he knows how to take care of me. It makes me sad knowing he probably doesn't see in me what I see in him.
Well hoped you liked it! Review please and tell me if you like where the story is going or not. I'll update as soon as I can (if you want me to keep going). Oh and sorry for such a short chapter