Who Wants to be an Evil Over Lord with Geese Howard
I do not own any characters from the King of Fighters. SNK does. But DAMN, I WISH
I DID! Anyway, I am borrowing them for a bit, and promise to bring them back
sparkling clean. And no, I am making no money off of this production. This is done
only for entertainment purposes.
And I am borrowing the show title of "Who Wants to be a Millionaire". No, this does
NOT follow THAT show… So, even though this fic really has NOTHING to do with the
show, I decide to just say I do not own that either, and STILL am making no money off
This is also a continuation of sorts to "King of Fighters Television". I have had many
people ask me to continue it, but specifically, Geese Howard's part. And so, I dedicate
this to all you Geese Howard fans out there. I hope this is satisfactory to you.
We see an over view of an audience. The area is mostly dark, and suddenly we hear an
Announcer: LIVE, FROM GEESE TOWER IN SOUTH TOWN! "WHO WANTS TO
BE AN EVIL OVER LORD WITH GEESE HOWARD"! AND HERE'S YOUR HOST,
THE SHADOW KING OF SOUTH TOWN HIMSELF… GEESE HOWARD!!!
Suddenly, a spotlight turns on, illuminating Geese Howard, who is standing behind a
podium with a microphone in it. Geese flashes the camera with one of his award-winning
Geese: HELLO, and welcome to my show…
Audience: WHO WANTS TO BE AN EVIL OVER LORD WITH GEESE HOWARD!
Geese: Right… Now, let me introduce my guests for tonight's program. Contestant #1.
From good old South Town, we have former King of Fighters champion, master of the
pole, and my right-hand-man, Billy Kane!
A spotlight turns on and illuminates Billy behind one of the podiums. Billy starts
blowing kisses at the audience.
Billy: Hey, hey, HEY! Love to see you all. (Blows kisses at camera). MUAH!
Geese: BILLY! STOP THAT! It reminds me too much of Benimaru…
Billy: Oh… Sorry boss…
Geese: Anyway… Contestant #2! All the way from Hong Kong, an illegal arms
smuggler, and assassin for hire, and a man that gives Iori Yagami a run for the title of the
"Insane Orochi Warrior", Ryuji Yamazaki!
A spotlight goes on and we see the illuminated form of Yamazaki behind a podium. He
runs his left hand through the blonde hair-dyed part of his hair. He smiles at the camera.
Yamazaki: Eh heh heh… Hello out there in TV land…
Yamazaki starts waving at camera. He takes out his dagger and twirls it around in his
hand for effect.
Geese (Stares at Yamazaki): … Show off…
Yamazaki does his Serpent Slash attack at Geese, but Geese catches it and counter
attacks with a blow to Yamazaki's upper body.
Yamazaki (Clutches his chest): GAH! THAT HURTS!
Geese: Then don't attack the host… (Looks at the camera). ANYWAY, contestant #3.
Also from South Town, a police officer, bounty hunter, and a blonde bombshell, Officer
'Blue' Mary Ryan!
A spotlight turns on and illuminates Mary behind a podium. She's tied up, and two men
in black suits point AK-47s at her.
Mary: LET ME GO YOU SICK SONUVABITCH!!!
Geese (Chuckles lightly to himself): Well, well… Ms. Ryan… What brings you on
Mary: Oh… I don't know… Maybe… BECAUSE YOUR MEN BROKE INTO MY
APARTMENT, TIED ME UP AND DRAGGED ME DOWN HERE!?!?!?
Mary spits at Geese, but it falls short of her intended target, and lands a foot in front of
Geese (Stares at the loogey on the floor): … Somebody clean that up…
A person comes by and cleans Mary's spit off the floor. Camera then zooms in on Geese
Geese: Okay, you know how to play. I ask the question, and you all give an answer.
The person that gets the answer correct gets the points. And the winner gets to be an Evil
Over Lord Now, let's begin…
Audience: WHO WANTS TO BE AN EVIL OVER LORD WITH GEESE
Mary: … Where do you get these people?
Geese: They're back-round characters from all those Capcom games. Anyway, question
#1, for 100 points. Back in '94, the King of Fighters became a 3-on-3 event. Who hosted
the tournament that year?
Billy: Um… Was it you boss? Sorry, I wasn't in it that year…
Yamazaki: OOH! OOH! THAT RED-EYED GUY! His name was… Um… Regal…
Raglan… Um… Was it Reagan?
Mary: A MUCH BETTER HOST THAN YOU COULD EVER HOPE TO BE, THAT'S
FOR DAMN SURE!
Geese (Stares at all of them): … I'll give it to Yamazaki that time…
Yamazaki (Raises arms above his head): WOHOO!!!
Geese: Okay, Question #2, also for 100 points. After the King of Fighters '95
tournament, there were some strange goings-on in South Town due to two brothers
looking for two Sacred scrolls. Who were those two people?
Billy: Um… Ryu and Ken?
Yamazaki: The Jin brothers! Those two paid me to find their scrolls and get the third.
Mary: I'm not sure, but… TERRY BEAT THEIR ASSES IN JUST LIKE HE
ALWAYS DOES YOURS GEESE!!!
Geese: Yamazaki gets the points.
Yamazaki: YEAH! (Starts dancing in place) I RULE, I RULE, I RULE…
Geese: … Okay… Question #3, for 300 points. Back in 1982, I had opened the first
King of Fighters tournament… What was my outfit for that year?
Billy: Um… I don't know… I didn't come into your service to '86 boss…
Yamazaki: HOW THE F*CK SHOULD I KNOW!?!?
Mary: You had this crappy blue tux, a horrible white vest, white-suede shoes, a red bolo
tie, and you had long hair. Basically, YOU HAD HORRIBLE FASHION SENSE!!!
Billy and Yamazaki stare at Geese.
Geese: … What do you expect? It was the 80s… And how the heck did you know I
wore that Ms. Ryan?
Mary (Smiles): I saw the pictures of you after Ryo Sakazaki had beaten your ass in.
Geese (Mutters): Stupid Sakazakis… (Out loud). Well, you get the points Mary…
ANYWAY, onto question #4, also for 300 points. My business, the "Geese Connection",
was not always called that… What was it known as before I took over?
Billy: Um… 'Howard Emporium'.
Yamazaki: Was it 'Geese R Us'?
Mary (Stares at Yamazaki and Billy): YOU IDIOTS! IT WAS THE
Billy: It can't be the 'Organization'! That sounds too cheesy.
Geese: Actually… She is correct…
Billy & Yamazaki: WHAT!?
Geese: What do you expect? IT WAS THE 80S!!! Anyway, Mary gets the points.
Now, question #5 for 500 points. Leona Heidern is known to be of the Orochi bloodline.
What is her elemental?
Billy: Um… Ice?
Yamazaki: Blood. She always seems to end up covered in it.
Mary: I don't know… BUT IT'S NOT YOUR PLACE TO TELL PEOPLE SHE'S OF
Geese: … Billy gets the points. He's not exactly right, but he's the closest.
Geese: Question #6, for 500 points. What is my favorite food?
Billy: OH, STEAK!
Yamazaki: I'm gonna say steak.
Mary: IT'S FRIED STEAK, AND I HOPE YOU HAVE A HEART ATTACK
BECAUSE OF IT!!!
Geese: Geez Mary… What's with you? I invited you here to participate, and this is how
you repay me?
Mary: … "Invited me"? YOU DIDN'T INVITE ME, YOU HAD YOUR GOONS
KIDNAP ME FROM MY HOME!!!
Geese: Same thing. Anyway, you get the points Mary. Now, question #7, for 1000
points. In the King of Fighters 2000 tournament, we saw the Anti-K' weapon from
N.E.S.T.S. Cartel, which had the powers of ice. What was the name of this weapon?
Billy: The "Zero Cannon".
Yamazaki: How the he'll should I know? I don't give a rat's ass about that failed Kyo
Mary: Are you talking about Kula Diamond? YOU MEAN THAT LITTLE GIRL WAS
Geese: … Well, Mary gets the points. Now for question #8, also for 1000 points. What
is my fighting style?
Yamazaki: Secret techniques from the three sacred scrolls.
Geese: … Actually… You are all correct in a sense… SO NO ONE GETS THE
Mary: Listen, I don't care about the points. I JUST WANT TO GO HOME!
Geese: Well to end the first segment… Yamazaki has 200 points, Billy has 500 points,
and Mary, surprisingly, has a WHOPPING 2100 points. And now it's time for the
lightning round… And I do mean lightning…
Orochi Shermie walks into the room. She has sparks trailing across her fingers.
Geese: Now… Same rules as before, but… If you get a WRONG answer… (Smiles
wickedly). You get shocked…
Billy, Yamazaki, & Mary: WHAT!?!?!?
Shermie: Come on down!
Lightning comes down from the sky and strikes the area in front of the contestants.
Billy, Yamazaki, & Mary (Stare at the charred ground): ……… Damn…
Shermie: Can I electrocute them now?
Geese: No Shermie… Only if they get a wrong answer… Now… Round two, question
Suddenly, the door bursts open with a kick and Terry Bogard comes running in.
Mary (Eyes are little hearts): TERRY!!!
Terry (Ignores Mary): GEESE!!!
Geese: Ugh… Not this boy again…
Terry: GEESE, YOU KILLED MY FATHER!!!
Geese: Oh please… HE ADOPTED YOU! You had no blood relation to that old geezer
Terry: I DON'T CARE, HE WAS STILL A FATHER TO ME!!!
Suddenly, Terry's brother Andy comes running in, and runs pass him.
Andy punches Geese, but Geese catches his punch. Geese then walks over to the side of
the tower and holds Andy over the edge.
Geese: Special question. What are Andy's chances of surviving a fall off my tower?
Billy: Slim to none.
Mary: Might as well get a cemetery plot ready for his corpse…
Geese: Well… We'll find out…
Geese let's go of Andy and drops him.
Andy (As he falls):
Suddenly, Mai Shiranui, and Joe Higashi stand up in the audience.
Joe: OH MY GOD, HE KILLED ANDY!
Mai: YOU BASTARD!
Mai runs up to Geese and performs her Kacho Sen, which is basically throwing little fans
at her opponent.
Geese (As little fans pummel him): Hey! ! OUCH! ! STOP,
THAT HURTS! ! HEY STOP IT! !
Mai: MEANIE! YOU KILLED ANDY!!!
Geese: DAMN IT! HELP ME SHERMIE!
Shermie (Making out with Yashiro): … I'M BUSY!
Geese: DAMN! RIPPER, HOPPER! SHOOT MARY!
The two men in black suits take aim with their guns at the tied up Mary. Mai throws fans
at their guns, and they lodge themselves in the guns' nozzles.
Mai (Makes a pose): JAPAN'S FINEST!
Geese: Well, this taping's gone straight to hell… (Turns head towards the camera).
Well, that's all for today. I hope to see all of you next week on…
Audience: WHO WANTS TO BE AN EVIL OVER LORD WITH GEESE HOWARD!
Geese then jumps off of Geese Tower.
Billy: Crap… I better get the squeegee…
Yamazaki: Well this has been a waste of time… I'm leaving.
Yamazaki grabs his white mink coat and walks out of there.
Terry (Teary-eyed, smiles, shakes his fist): At last… Geese is dead…
Mary (As Joe unties her): Um, Terry-kins?
Terry: Yes Mary?
Mary: Let me ask you this? How many times has Geese fallen off of this tower?
Terry: Well, um… Gee… That's a good question… He's done it so many times I lost
Mary: Exactly, so…
Terry (Eyes widen with realization): DAMN IT!!! Oh well… Let's go get a hot dog…
Mary (Shakes her head): Sigh… Terry, Terry, Terry…
Mai (Cries): WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! MY ANDY IS DEAD!
Eiji Kisaragi walks in and looks around.
Eiji: Hello? Is Billy here? We were supposed to go bowling and talk about the good old
days, like when Iori simultaneously kicked our asses.
Billy: Hey Eiji. Sorry, but I gotta go check on the boss.
Eiji: … Fell off the tower again?
Eiji (Shakes his head): Sigh… Well, see you latURK!!!
Mai has tackled Eiji.
Mai: OOH! EJI KISARAGI, THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR OF KISARAGI-RYU
NIJITSU! I'M ONE OF YOUR BIGGEST FANS!!!
Eiji: Re, really?
Mai (With sparkles in her eyes): OH YES!
Eiji: Um… Maybe you should get off of me before your boyfriend sees…
Mai: Nuh uh! Andy got thrown off of Geese Tower.
Eiji: … SWEET! LET'S GO BOWLING!
Mai: … You get me as a girlfriend, and you want to go BOWLING!?
Eiji: Um… Yeah…
Mai (Sweat drops): … Sigh… It's a start…
Eiji and Mai leave the place with arms locked. Terry offers a hand to Mary, and the two
leave hand-in-hand. Joe is left to stare at Yashiro and Shermie who are still Making out.
Joe (Teary-eyed): … I never get the girl…
Lily (Stands up in the audience and waves): Hi Joe!
Joe (Eyes sparkle): LILY!!!
Billy: HEY! LEAVE MY SISTER ALONE!!!
Billy swipes at Joe with his rod as he chases him. Lily sweat drops. Shermie and
Yashiro are STILL making out.
Meanwhile, in an apartment in Japan, a certain couple in bed watches all this on the
Iori: I can't believe they actually show this crap on TV…
Leona: Sigh… Well, it's better than Springer, that's for sure…
Iori (Smirks): Hey Leona… I know something that's MUCH more entertaining…
Leona (Eyes Iori with curiosity): Oh? (Eyes widen with realization). OH! (Smiles).
You naughty boy…
Iori: You know you wouldn't like me any other way…
Iori then gets under the covers and Leona joins him.
Outside of Geese Tower, on the streets of South Town…
Geese (Lies on the ground): … Well, still kicking… (Gets up, wipes the dust off of his
shoulders). I survive this three more times and I win that bet with my half-brother
Krauser… So, how do you feel Andy?
Bloody-pulp: … Gurgle…
Geese (Smirks): I thought as much… Heh… I love being the "Immortal Geese
Well, that's it for "Who Wants to be an Evil Over Lord with Geese Howard". If you
actually want more, just let me know.
Send questions and comments to Ryutsurugi@yahoo.com
-This is RedPriest17, signing off.