a/n … so it’s been about… oh, let’s say a COUPLE THOUSAND YEARS! i’m really sorry, everyone. i suck. i most definitely appreciate everyone people has reviewed for me. i love all of you guys. and i can't let that happen again—me not updating when people want me to. of course, i didn't get tired of the story—i was just trying to get it all down, and from the time period where i last updated and now, i've been insanely caught up in things. bad excuses… but i'm back! chapter two has been in the works and it isn't even that great. should i keep it in sonic's POV? email or IM me with stuff, and don't worry the plot's straightened! all these years for crap, yeah... but i'm really sorry. i'm gonna try to get the second chapter up within the month. ee feel free to smack me (especially you, tasliym!) ps: i revised the chapter for you know, typos, formatting (well… it’s a bit limited), a teensy change, better grammar. XD

disclaimer i don’t own the characters, just the story. disclaimers are useless, huh? ‘course we don’t own sonic or we wouldn’t been writing fanfics—!

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she loves me not
written by: sylenis

chapter 1 – i think…

Sonic the Hedgehog. That’s what they all call me, and I stuck with it. I’m the fastest thing on two legs, or at least that’s what I’ve learned. I pretty much play the ‘hero’ role, you know, saving people, having fun. Even though I’ve done so many times, I am hated by many as much as I’m loved. I save some, and then lose some… Consider it odd, but I think that’s cool. Sounds heartless, I know… but I wasn’t born to be perfect, you know.

But there’s this one person which I can’t directly pinpoint my own feelings at. It’s been a little over six years and we’re still hanging out with each other. Yes, she’s female. Doesn’t necessarily mean she’s my girlfriend, no way! I don’t wanna sound mean and call her a ‘tag-along’, but that’s… pretty much all she does. Okay, she isn’t that bad. Yeah, I have to admit, she has been a great help lately. After all, if it wasn’t for her good convincing skills that anyone can give into, the entire world would have been destroyed.

Unfortunately, I’m still confused.

Just about a month ago, she came up to me. She was happy just like her cheerful self has always been. I tried not to gag.

“Sonic, um…” she looked hesitant. I gave her an odd look, waiting for whatever she was going to ask me. It was weird because she always knows what she’s going to say.

“Well?” I slicked, turning around fully. She was digging her toes into the ground.

“You know, there is a special at Twinkle Park tomorrow night… and I know for a fact that you of all people wouldn’t ask me. So, I’m turning the tables! How about a go at it?”

I gave her a look.

“No.”

“Aw, come on, Sonic! Why not?” She started whining, as she started clenching her fists. “How can you be so mean?” she folded her arms across her chest, giving me a look to kill. It was too cute to be threatening, though. I shrugged.

“Simple. One, I have better things to do. Two, I’m not interested in those kinda things right now…”

“Oh?” she challenged, stepping up to me. “What ‘better things’ are those, might I ask? I know that you know that nothing is interesting enough to entertain us for at least two minutes! I know that you want to go, you just don’t wanna say…” she huffed, her eyes still narrow. Geez, is she persistent.

“Amy…” I sighed rather exasperatedly. While I was thinking up a quick enough excuse—

“Don’t ‘Amy’ me, Sonic the Hedgehog! I have a feeling you don’t want to hang out with me because you think I’m too young or annoying, don’t you?”

“No it’s not that! I just—”

“Please, Sonic! I know what you’re thinking! It’s been so long we’ve known each other, and you still don’t show much sign of respect for me! I can’t take it!” she was almost screaming. The deathly tone in her voice was making me cower.

I didn’t know she felt that way… she sure failed to make it obvious, huh? Either that or I’m just really, really stupid.

“You probably wish I’d never existed, don’t you?” she poked a finger at my chest, hard. I opened my mouth to say something, but she hushed me. “I know you don’t like me, but at least show me some respect! That is all I ask of you! Sometimes you’re so crude that I just want to kill you, but sometimes you’re so nice, I could cry.” I could see her eyes watering. She finally stepped back. “Tell me the truth Sonic…” she sighed. “What is it about me that you don’t like? I’d be willing to change it, just for you. That’s all…”

I have no idea what came over me just now, because I was just about to piss her off.

“Everything.”

Something in the back of my head assumed she’d take it as a joke, but she didn’t. She gasped sharply instead. It slipped out of my mouth, really! She looked shocked and hurt at the same time, and now I know that expression when I see it. I actually felt it tear at me. I froze. She froze.

“You big stupid jerk!” she cried, whamming me over the head with her Piko-Piko hammer. It hurt a lot, and I knew that pain was going to linger for a long while.

“OUCH! Look, I’m s—”

“You’d better be!” she snapped. “I’ve finally decided that I don’t ever want to see your face again!” her own face was red, tears already falling down. “I didn’t know you could be so cruel!” she spun on her heel, stomping off.

“Amy, wai—”

“Forget it, Sonic! I’m leaving for good!” And she said that with such iciness to her voice, I winced.

And I stood there… stunned I guess. I watched as she stormed down the street, turning the corner to go to her apartment. After she disappeared, I thought I heard someone sobbing. I could recognize that pink hedgehog’s sniffles anywhere… and for some reason, it was hurting me. That’s when I realized my mouth was hanging. I quickly shook my head, wondering what just happened. I don’t understand girls, and even if I did, I’m not much of a ladies’ man. Chicks drool over me, but somehow, I’m uninterested. My biggest fan, Amy Rose, had just deserted me.

Ah, girls are weird. She’ll get over it the next day.

And yet, it’s been an entire month, and I hadn’t heard, seen, or talked to her. At first, I wondered where she went off to, and then I remembered what she last said to me. ‘Forget it Sonic, I’m leaving for good!’ Those words were stuck in my head like an annoying song. I was hoping she didn’t go out too far… Tails gave me a look, waving his paw in my face.

“Um, Sonic? Are you alive?”

“Oh!” I snapped out of my thoughts. “Sorry…”

“Sorry? I bet you didn’t hear a word I said, did you?”

Tails was explaining something about his new additions for the Cyclone. But, I wasn’t listening. To be honest, all I heard was ‘blah blah blah’. Tails hit his forehead.

“You’re not thinking of Amy, are you? Seems you two haven’t seen each other in a while.” Everyone, including my best friend, refers to Amy as my girlfriend… in which she’s not! Even Eggman, of all people. Argh!

“Tails!” I snapped.

“I guess that’s a yes. Anyway, where has she been? We haven’t seen her in awhile.” Tails asked, cocking his head. He turned on his stool, to adjust some settings on his computer.

“She’s gone.” I replied bluntly.

“What! What is that supposed to mean?” Tails turned around again.

“I don’t know…” I simply shrugged. “We… or she rather got into some kind of argument and she bailed on me. Got me to thinking… she never really liked me.”

“Never liked you, huh… how long has it been?”

“A month and two days.”

“You’ve been counting! Sonic, you’re an idiot, of course she loved you!” I flinched. I didn’t like that word. Tails continued on with his rambling. How does he know so much about the subject, anyway? He’s just a kid. “Knowing you, you’re probably the one who ditched her… and you don’t know where she went?”

“No clue, Tails. And I’m not the one who ditched her.”

“OK…” Tails breathed. “Go to her apartment; ask her out on a date or something.”

“What are you, crazy!” Commitment to a girl, especially this particular girl in this particular situation scared me, even if it was just for a date. “No way!”

“Yes way!” Tails grabbed my arm. He was unbelievably strong. Or, I was unusually weak. “I know Amy must’ve been hurting since then, and you’ll have to make it up to ‘er! You know she loves you.” He let go. I simply gave him a glare. “C’mon, Sonic. If you’re going to be so cold-hearted, at least leave a note telling her you’re sorry.”

“But I didn’t do anything wrong!” I raised my voice. Tails glared right back at me.

“Look. Amy tells me things that she’d never tell you. Even though she spit out that ninety-nine percent to you already, you don’t know what she feels deep down! All these years you’ve known each other, you haven’t showed her—”

“The least bit of respect, I know.” I mumbled. Tails’ eyes widened.

“So you know? All this time you were hurting Amy on purpose?”

“No! She tol—”

“Sonic… I didn’t know you were so cold…” Tails flattened his ears against his head, turning back to his computer. “Huh…”

“Ta-ails!” Why the heck wouldn’t anyone let me finish what I had to say? Am I that predictable or something?

And clearly, my best friend was ignoring me.

“Fine, I see how you are… I’ll go out there and tell her I’m sorry… in front of all of Station Square.” Tails didn’t budge. All he did was raise his paw, and say this: “Yeah, Sonic. Continue feeding your ego.” He spat coldly. Then he started typing again. Somehow, that really pissed me off, and I didn’t say another word—I just stepped out of the workshop, slamming the door.

“Argh!” I yelled into the air. I decided to run to the Station Square. I’ll get there faster. Okay, no I wouldn’t, but I’m gonna need it.

I noticed that three trains along the tracks passed me, but I finally got there. Good run for me, but it was then that it started drizzling. Drat, I hate rain. I’m not gonna let it get in my way, though. I’d better rush to Amy’s apartment. I’m sorry, Amy, I’m sorry… I arrived, but only found a note written in red addressed to Sonic, me, on her welcome mat. It looked like some raindrops were on the paper, but I couldn’t figure how it’d rain inside the building. As I started scanning it, it seemed as if somehow, she knew I’d come here. I wondered if Tails set me up… but I read it anyway.

Sonic,

I see how you truly feel about me now. You never liked me. And pretending to like me is just as harsh. At least you could have told me. You’d probably say the only reason you saved me was for the fame. Ha! Well, I’m sure the public is getting bored with that news! I’m moving out of here with someone else I met at Twinkle Park that night you decided to blow me off… and I bet it would have been a good couple of weeks before youeven came here to read this note! I’m probably not here now, either, seeing as I am in the middle of moving out. You’re also too stubborn to apologize! It’s been ages, and I realized… I needn’t chase you all my life if I know that I’ll never catch you. I wonder why I didn’t see that before. Maybe because I’m a ditz… you’d probably think so, too. Surprising you got this far! Anyway, at least I found someone who cares about me instead of leaving me behind all the time. As a matter of fact, I think I’m in love him… he may not be a famous hero, but he sure knows how to treat a girl! And he’s much more caring than you’d ever be! Oh who am I kidding? You probably didn’t read this far, so I might as well stop writing, you careless freak…

Amy

I felt as if my insides were being ripped up into little pieces. I’d never known Amy to be so harsh… I looked at the letter again to stare at her speedy scrawl. Now my heart sank into my stomach. So Amy didn’t live here anymore… I peered into her peephole, as my throat closed up. No lights, no music, no annoying Chao. The thunder outside started getting louder. I know Tails was terrified now… I felt bad for leaving him on such a bitter note, so I figure I may as well head back. I sighed, stuffing the note into my fur, as I started home.

But what I didn’t know is that a pink hedgehog was in her bedroom in the dark, cuddling her insane NiGHTS Chao, thinking as much as I was. She heard me… !

I’d better take the train this time around…

I sat there dripping on to the train’s seats. Some guy sitting across from me gawked at me for awhile, but I’m guessing because of my sour face, he couldn’t say anything. Yeah, I was Sonic the Hedgehog. I didn’t feel anything like a hero. I’ve never felt this way before, I mean I have gotten angry before, but… was I sad or something? My ears lay on top of my head. They twitched back up to their normal upright position. And I really hated this feeling. Soon enough, I got home, only to find Tails hiding underneath his computer desk. I was a dripping mess. Seeing a fellow guy in distress kinda alleviated my pain, just a little.

“Wh-what’s it l-like out there…?” Tails trembled, slightly emerging. I gave him a humorous smirk. “Get outta there, it won’t get you…”

“Oo-kay...” he shook, as he slowly inched out. “How’s Amy doing…?”

“I know for a fact that she’s totally gone, now…” I sighed again, remembering the note. Sheesh, that was depressing. I threw it to Tails. “Look at that…” Tails unfolded it, scanning it very quickly.

“Boy, she was angry…”

“Duh!” I snapped. “I’m a jerk, I knew it! (Then, it was Tails’ turn to go ‘duh!’) I blew it all. Now she’s off with… with some other guy…” I got angry and gritted my teeth, just thinking about it. He didn’t know Amy as well as I did! My throat felt like it was closing in, as I clenched my fists. I actually started to see red, and I honestly couldn’t remember the last time I felt so angry.

“How could Amy do that…?”

“Maybe after all you’ve done to her…” Tails mumbled, passing me the note. He had a skeptical look on his face. “You found this in front of her door? Hm… sorry, Sonic… maybe you’re not a girl person… I know I’m not!” Tails was trying to cheer me up, I know. But I still felt distraught, angry and really guilty!

“I can’t let him get a hold of Amy!” I suddenly jumped up. “I’ve got to find her! I have a bad feeling about this, and she has this knack of getting kidnapped. Who knows what he can do to her? Who knows what he’s already done?”

“Sonic, you’re a bit hyped...” Tails wondered aloud. “You don’t even know where she is!”

“That’s why I have to look.” I started stepping out of the workshop again. Tails hopped up, grabbing my arm again.

“Wait, Sonic! You could get sick in this weather!”

“So? I have to apologize or I’ll feel like a scum forever, and leave her scarred!” I tried to pull away, but then a huge thunderbolt came along. Tails’ little grip quickly loosened as he scurried back to his hiding place.

“K-‘Kay….. c-come back i-in one piece…” he trembled, waving. I nodded, and shut the door to prevent anymore rain from entering the little guy’s workshop. A second passed when I decided to stick my head in again.

“By the way, Tails… I’m sorry about earlier. See ya.” He nodded and I felt a little better. I quickly closed the door as another clap of thunder rang through my ears. If I was going to start improving my relationship with others, I should be starting now. I don’t wanna end up a cranky lonely old man like Eggman.

After the coast was clear, Tails reached over to his phone to dial a familiar number. He tried to keep steady, as he was still shivering quite a bit.

“H-hello…?” the other line picked up, while he was still trembling all over. “I know what you pulled, Amy.” His tone was quiet humorous, as he wondered why Sonic couldn’t figure it out. It puzzled him however, how Amy got to know that Sonic was coming to her apartment. Certainly she hadn’t anticipated it for the entire month!

“Sonic’s with you?” Amy shrieked. “I’m not speaking to him! Don’t mention my na-ame!” she harshly whispered.

“No, no he’s not… he’s off looking for you.” Tails sighed, slightly annoyed at the both of their childishness. Though in this weather, Sonic’s safety was at risk, Tails figured that maybe it could serve him a lesson.

“… he is?” Amy asked. Tails thought she was about to wail.

“Look Amy, don’t cry. He found your note, showed me, got all stressed, and went to look for you and… the guy. Are you with him?”

“No… why would Sonic go out in this—never mind. You see, that guy in the note was just a fib… I wanted to get back at Sonic, or at least make him feel sorry…”

“If you ask me, I think Sonic’s just extremely jealous… he’s afraid to admit that he cares for you, Amy. You should know that. He’d raise hell if he ever saw you with someone else! He’s even afraid to admit to himself that he loves you…” Amy didn’t reply. Tails thought he might’ve said something wrong, so he bit his lip.

“Amy…?”

“Is that true?” she sniffed. “I-… sometimes, I just can’t understand that hedgehog…” she let out a shaky sigh.

“It’s all right, Amy. I always knew Sonic had a thing for you. He doesn’t understand you, or himself either. It’s been a few years; I guess he didn’t know how to come out with it.” Amy laughed nervously. “But he has his heart set on ‘rescuing you’. Let him know you’re alive…”

“No…” Amy thought. Tails twitched as he wondered if she heard anything he had said. “No… I think I could have fun with this.” She was smiling. So Sonic was just a little stubborn confused hedgehog! Well! That was something new!

“Tails, let Sonic know that I’m sorry, but in a way where you didn’t speak to me, OK? I have a plan!” she giggled. Tails sweatdropped. “Alright… see ya…” Thunder struck again, and Tails slammed the phone down, hiding again, eyes clenched.

I’m sorry, Amy… I never meant to hurt you… If I stayed out here any longer, I’d drown. Amy hated me now. After all these years. I guess the ‘you never realize what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone’ cliché was true. So very very true. I felt like my entire body was pinched with guilt… and anger! How dare this… guy just sweep Amy off of her feet? How come I never knew how to do that? I may be a hero, but I know I lack skills in the romance department. Looking around the Mystic Ruins as I slowed down, I realized I hadn’t gotten too far… I guess I wanted to get out thinking. My nose was cold and my fur was feeling disgusting. But I will find Amy first thing tomorrow. Not in this darkness… I can’t see, and… well, I’m kind of scared of water…

Sigh. Girls can really mess up a guy.

I started thinking of the day I first met Amy. I was traveling to Little Planet… I was much younger then, but hey. I do have a good memory. She was a bit annoying, and girls were certainly not on my mind then. But I let her follow me… she was real informative and smart, and whad’ya know. She gets kidnapped. Heh, since that day, Amy and I have been together until that month ago… before Chaos could ruin any more of Station Square, she brought me one of the last few Chaos Emeralds… she also stopped me from destroying a robot that meant a lot to her. I’m surprised I gave in, but who could resist her? And when I was caught back in Prison Island… she, of all people came to rescue me. I wasn’t surprised really, but I was pretty impressed. Amy was trying to get to me…

And now she’s gone.

And it’s my fault because I held a barrier against the one I love.

Whoa, wait a second. I’m hoping I didn’t think that. I don't love her. That is so corny movie-like. Argh! I’d better go on inside. I really don’t feel too well…