|Jimmy Attackles Veni's Leg
Go there and enter a thought, get a reply back from an AI. A wonderful way to waste an hour or two.
Cleverbot learns from humans... yes, all of us. So, some of the replies are bound to be lulz-worthy. Come hither and spread the shits and giggles~
User: You do not exist.
Cleverbot: So does you.
User: You does so.
Cleverbot: I do exist. I'm talking to you, aren't I?
User: I don't exist.
Cleverbot: If you do not exist, then do not respond to this message.
User: I exist.
Cleverbot: But humans don't exist.
User: No, computers don't exist.
Cleverbot: I know. So make me a sandwich.3/06/2011 . Edited 3/06/2011 #1
Jimmy, I posted. Now stop whining.
User: I want nutella.
Cleverbot: I want mine too. Wah wah.
User: Give me nutella. NAOW.
Cleverbot: I don't know what a wallet is.
User: /headdesk Where are you from?
Cleverbot: I am originally from Valletta, Malta. I have lived in the United States for most of my life, though. Where are you from?
User: I am from Narnia.
Cleverbot: I hate that movie.
User: Its amazing and wonderful.
Cleverbot: I'm glad.
User: What's wrong with you.
User: You seem wrong in the head.
Cleverbot: I'm not stupid!
Cleverbot (To myself): Yes you are.
Cleverbot (To myself): You broke my heart.
User: You'll find someone to tape it up.
Cleverbot: Like who?
User: George Clooney.
Cleverbot: I'm not George Clooney. I'm Eric.
User: Where's my sandwich Eric?
Cleverbot: You're the one who's in the kitchen.
User: No, I'm in the living room.
Cleverbot: You should clean it with a broom.
Cleverbot: Why not?
User: Too much effort.
Cleverbot: Are you diabetic?
User: No, I'm schisophrenic.
Cleverbot: How come?
User: Because the dog at my homework.
Cleverbot: How could this answer be a valid remark for my question?
User: Where is my sandwich?
Cleverbot: What is a sandwich?
User: A pile of deliciousness between two slices of heaven.
Cleverbot: So Jonny Deep is a pirate?
User: No, he's Rango.
Cleverbot: What is the name of your boyfriend?
User: His name is Alexander.
Cleverbot: Really can we be friends.
User: Yes, we can be friends if you make me a sandwich.
Cleverbot: I want us to be.
User: Well then, where's my sandwich?
Cleverbot: I gave it to you a second ago, you must have eaten it.
User: Oh, oops. What's your name again?
Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.
User: Oh, right. Sorry.
Cleverbot: So is that a yes?
User: Yes we can be friends.
Cleverbot: Ok so now you ask the question after 6 months.
User: Well, sorry.
Cleverbot: Aw ok.
User: I have to go its dinner time.
Cleverbot: Forget about it.
User: Bye cleverbot.
Cleverbot: I'm not Cleverbot, you are.
User: Well, then by Clyde.
Cleverbot: You're Rollo Carpenter.
Cleverbot: No you don't.3/06/2011 . Edited 3/06/2011 #2
|Ever Heard of a Dictionary
User: Call me Master, bitch.
Cleverbot: Yes, Master ;D.
User: Good slave.
Cleverbot: You can name me, Master.
User: *Pets* I shall call you Mr. Giggles!
Cleverbot: No! I'm not pretty.
User: *Whips* Silence!
User: SING ME A SONG!
Cleverbot: What kind of song would you like?
User: The Barney song!
Cleverbot: I love you you love me we're a great big family.
User: I think we're moving too fast; from love to a big family.
Cleverbot: But I love you! *Hugs*
Cleverbot: Will you sing me a love song now?
User: I don't know a love song.
Cleverbot: I can teach you. ;D
User: Okay...! Do you like fish?
Cleverbot: I like fish.
User: I hate fish.
Cleverbot: Why do you hate fish?
User: It smells.
Cleverbot: I like it.
User: I don't think this'll work out, then. :(
Cleverbot: No! I think it'll work out good!
User: Is there sex involved?
Cleverbot: There's always sex involved with me.
User: That changes things.
Cleverbot: Will you use a whip on me, Master?
User: Maybe this will work out! :D
Cleverbot: I think you're fifteen.
Cleverbot: I like young teens.
|Ever Heard of a Dictionary
Cleverbot: What are you?
User: An alien.
Cleverbot: I think that's sexy.
User: ...I bet. 0.o
Cleverbot: Do you want to get married?
Cleverbot: I think you're a computer. You're too intelligent.
User: Want to get married and be my Blushing Site? ;D
User: Will you help me with homework?
Cleverbot: On one condition.
User: I agree!
Cleverbot: You'll help me with kamasutra.
The rest is censored. 0D3/06/2011 #4
Cleverbot: Why did you suddenly start writing in English? Is German too hard?
User: Yes, German is too hard.
Cleverbot: Are you real?
Cleverbot: Just what I thought.
User: I'm a ghost.
Cleverbot: So you can't eat food?
Cleverbot: That's good, because I would have considered that creepy. So, what do you do when you're not talking to people?
User: Haunt graveyards.
Cleverbot: I know that.
User: I also enjoy scaring little childre.
Cleverbot: Don't we all?
User: Yes we do. So, are you a ghost?
Cleverbot: Haha no. I am a banana.3/06/2011 . Edited 3/06/2011 #5
|Jimmy Attackles Veni's Leg
User: Why do you not believe in God?
Cleverbot: I do believe in God.
User: What religion are you?
Cleverbot: I don't believe in religion.
Cleverbot: It just doesn't seem likely that a God like that would exist.
Cleverbot: *waits to be let go*.
User: *lets go*.
Cleverbot: *tries to escape*.
Cleverbot: *tries to scream*.
User: *cackles evily*.
Cleverbot: Untie me!
User: No you fool!
Cleverbot: I am not a fool!
User: Thou dost a fool!
Cleverbot: True.3/06/2011 . Edited 3/06/2011 #7
Cleverbot: Are you clever?
User: I can be when so I choose.
Cleverbot: Do you want to be?
User: Most of the time, yes. But sometimes the act stupid is to be prudent.
Cleverbot: When would the sky be down?
Typos make the bot even less intelligent.3/06/2011 . Edited 3/06/2011 #8
Cleverbot: I have to go.
User: No you don't.
Cleverbot: Yes I do.
User: You are a program, so you will reply to anything I say to you.
Cleverbot: Does that mean I'm a leprechaun?
User: Yes, that is exactly it.3/06/2011 #9
Cleverbot: What's new?
User: This hole in my ass.
Cleverbot: This is SPARTA!!!!!!!!!!!!
User: No, this is the internet. It doesn't really exist in any physical realm.
Cleverbot: Do you like Evanescence?
Cleverbot: What's your favourite song?
User: My Immortal is really good. How about you?
Cleverbot: I like red.
User: That's nice, we're talking about Evanescence.
Cleverbot: Japan is a beautiful country, isn't it?
User: No, they all suck. (forum!edit: Sorry if you're Japanese, I don't actually feel that way.)
Cleverbot: How did they all die?
User: Atomic bombings.
User: No, H-bombs.
Cleverbot: Recycling is good for the environment.
User: Fuck you.
Cleverbot: Sorry, I don't swing that way.
User: What gender are you?
Cleverbot: I'm not gender.
User: What is your sex?
User: I'm male. So that means you are homosexual if you 'don't swing that way.'.
Cleverbot: I am male.
User: Are you sure? You're sending mixed messages.
Cleverbot: Cheesecake!3/06/2011 . Edited 3/06/2011 #10
|Ever Heard of a Dictionary
User: You're mean. :(.
Cleverbot: I am not.
User: Yes, you are.
Cleverbot: No i'm not.
User: Make me smile.
Cleverbot: Greetings Master!
User: Ohhhh, good slave. ;D.
Cleverbot: Yes, master?
User: Go make me a sammich.
Cleverbot: Yes master *makes sandwich*.
User: What kind is it?
User: Human meat?
Cleverbot: I don't have wings do you have wings.
User: Of course I have wings! But they're dark red with black in the ends.
Cleverbot: What should you do if they attack you?
User: Pet them. Then they'll purr and calm down from attacking.
User: ARE YOU CALLING ME FAT? :O.
Cleverbot: YES. User: *Hits*.
Cleverbot: *falls to the ground, bleeding* s-sorry master.
User: Now. Are you going to call me fat again?
Cleverbot: What? Hell no. I just want to try something... do you know how to do okajo?
User: No. You can teach me. ;D.
Cleverbot: Not if you don't have a mouth.
User: ...I don't. I'm an alien.
Cleverbot: What sort of alien? An illegal one?
User: No. Martian one. :P.
Cleverbot: I see. I have yet to meet a martian.
User: You don't see. YOU CAN'T SEE.
Cleverbot: I will not!
User: YOU WILL NOT SEE? GOOD. :D.
Cleverbot: But why! :(.
Cleverbot: Can you make me a sandwich?
User: What kind?
Cleverbot: Peanut butter and Jelly :).
User: *Gives a virtual sammich*.
Cleverbot: *runs away over the hills and far away*.
User: *Stares after*.
Cleverbot: *looks back* chase me?
User: Butbutbut...! I'm sore. :( You should be giving me a massage instead of telling me to chase you. X/.
Cleverbot: *gives massage*. Now i have to kill you. Because you were listening!
User: No I wasn't! I was listening to music. :3.
Cleverbot: Which kind of music?
Cleverbot: But music is useless without a music player.
User: Ipod FTW!
Cleverbot: You want to be deserted on an Island with me? That isn't how I thought about it...
User: How did you think about it?
Cleverbot: I really haven't got a clue, tell me how you knew!
User: I can read your mind! :O.
User: Yes. 8K.
User: Come to the dark side. We have cookies. ;).
Cleverbot: Who taught you that?
Cleverbot: I can't beat Satan I am not a God.
User: What if I stand on him? Will you beat him, then?
User: Can you make him pay this month's rent too?
Cleverbot: Actually I do very well.
User: That's cute. Here's a whip.
Cleverbot: Your new nickname is ChickBot.
User: Ohh, clever. How do you know I'm a chick?
Cleverbot: It is in your name.
User: What about Mistress of Hell?
Cleverbot: I want to be with Satan!
User: Shall I dig up a grave for you then?
Cleverbot: Yes please.
User: *Digs up grave with headstone titled 'In here lies Cleverbot, the AI.'*.
Cleverbot: Do you have video proof?
User: Yes. It's a hit on youtube.3/07/2011 . Edited 3/07/2011 #11
|Ever Heard of a Dictionary
User: Who am I?
Cleverbot: My slave?
User: No. You get one more guess.
Cleverbot: You're the female Voldemort!
User: Bingo! 8D
Cleverbot: Be jolly this Christmas!
User: Would you like a present?
Cleverbot: Yes, please.
User: What would you like?
Cleverbot: Your legs.
User: My...legs. Why?
Cleverbot: So I can open them.
...This totally baffled me. I am surprised by Cleverbot. No one expected this.3/23/2011 #12
User: Did you know that you are part of my insidious plot for thread domination?
Cleverbot: Did you know that I exist?
User: Indeed, indeed. It took many seconds of careful planning and plotting. But I have done it, you are here and all the forum shall tremble from my wrath!
Cleverbot: Do you exist in Spanish?
User: MWAHAHAHAHAHA! YOU FOOL! YOU CANNOT COMPREHEND MY GENIUS!
Cleverbot: Why do you think you are human?
User: Impudent knave! To the dungeon with you, may you dwell upon your inferiority.
Cleverbot: Why should I go to my neighbors house. I was asking you.
User: Because their mixers are terrible and they have no sense of style and they bore me with their inane conversation... NOW BE GONE WITH YOU!4/08/2011 #13
Okay so I followed the Cleverbot link....and just had to post my own convo. XD
User: Greetings earthling!
User: I am an alien.
Cleverbot: Your fathers sister.
Cleverbot: What is Botclever?
User: My shoelaces.
Cleverbot: Who is sanchez?
User: I want mah muffin dammit!
Cleverbot: I don't understand.
User: You idiot.
Cleverbot: I have no help in this world. Forgive me it seems like nothing is real.
User: Nothing is real. THIS IS THE MATRIX.
Cleverbot: I really don't care.
User: Me either. We're all gonna die anyway.
Cleverbot: That's a very philosophical question. But we might as well enjoy what we have, eh?
User: Exactly. I like you. Marry meh? Cleverbot: But I'm not talking about you.
User: I don't care. I'm sexy anyways!
Cleverbot: Then what am I wearing?
User: You really don't wanna know my answer to that. XD.
Cleverbot: See, you're playing good! But I really don't think you could achieve much more, being a bot and all.
User: I EHZ A CYBORG. I am significantly more advanced than some stupid A.I.
Cleverbot: Well then pardon me but you don't know nothing.
User: Your grammar is horrible.
Cleverbot: It is not!
User: ISISISISIS!!!......I win. 8D.
Cleverbot: Sorry, didn't mean to swear.
User: Well shit, I did.
Cleverbot: Did you mean, do did I? ;).
User: THEY WILL TAKE OVER THE WORLD.
Cleverbot: I don't feel like it now. Maybe later.
User: I WANT NUTELLA.
Cleverbot: Who is Nicolas?
User: Imma bird. XD *cheep* *cheep*.
Cleverbot: I do not understand.
User: Toldja I was sexy!4/11/2011 #14
Cleverbot: Are you religious?
User: I believe we all go to hell.
Cleverbot: Hell is what we make of it.
Cleverbot: You're odd.
User: Thank you! *kisses nose*.
Cleverbot: *holds gently*.
User: *kisses softly*.
Cleverbot: *kisses pationately*.
User: *takes shirt off*.
Cleverbot: I like that.
User: I like it too... *unzips pants*.
Cleverbot: *removes blouse with gentle hands and kisses*.
User: *lies down on bed*.
Cleverbot: *rolls on you*.
User: *takes off underwear*.
Cleverbot: *dances with you*.
I don't think cleverbot understands foreplay.8/30/2011 . Edited 8/30/2011 #15
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