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Caladrius
Poll: Who should win the competition in "Uchiha Revival"? Vote Now!
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since: 05-05-06, id: 1040614, Profile Updated: 11-20-09
country: United States
Author has written 13 stories for Animal Crossing, Harvest Moon, and Naruto.


OH MY GOD...

I. Have. No. Idea why updates haven't been done yet. I apologize—sincerely. Well, my computer was busted for a little while, but that hardly makes up for all of this time. I'm working on it now, although the over-the-top humor stories (Uchiha Revival and The Voice) are a bit... boring at the moment... I have little inspiration to get them done, and no idea what I want to have happen in later chapters on top of that. ...accepting help? :33 Anywaaay. Then there's That's A Promise... I'm heavily revising that. I'll probably end up just making a new story, honestly. Sorry to those who like it as is—I'm having trouble with the plot and getting inspiration. Then The New Generation. Got a couple readers. This one I'm also redoing, although to a lesser extent. Might change the title, etc.

All the news I've got at the moment.


UPDATES:

The Voice: Chapter 12 isn't started yet. BRAINSTORMING for the current chapter. Kind of.

Just Friends: Currently on stand-still.

That's A Promise: Story is being revised greatly.

Uchiha Revival: Chapter 4 has not been started. BRAINSTORMING for this chapter.

The New Generation: Chapter 4 is not started. I need to work on the others before I update this again.


~ THE BASICS


The Name: My first name's 'Jaycee', and my last name's a mystery (dun dun duuuuuuuun). On the internet I generally go by 'Cala'. I dropped the 'drius' a while ago.

The Birth: March 22nd, 1995—I’m fourteen.

The Sex: Yes please~. Okay, I’m female (surprise, surpise).

What I Listen To: Incubus, Green Day, Paul Simon, Simon & Garfunkel, Three Days Grace, Avenged Sevenfold, Avril Lavigne, Tool, The Offspring, Soundgarden, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Metallica, The Clash, Ramones, Lunic, Audioslave, A Perfect Circle.

I Like To Read: Harry Potter, various Tamora Pierce books, The Witch’s Boy, The Thief Lord, Uglies, Tamir Triad, practically any Roald Dahl book.

Favorite Anime: Dragon Ball Z/GT, Fullmetal Alchemist, Naruto, Gunslinger Girl, Gundam Wing, Pokemon, Aria.

Then Manga: Dragon Ball Z, Dragon Ball (up to volume 2), Gunslinger Girl, Naruto, Dr. Slump (up to volume 4), Bleach (up to volume 4).

Gaming: Paper Mario, Pokemon, Fire Emblem, Naruto/DBZ games (RPG/Fighting), Animal Crossing, Harvest Moon.


~ FANFICTION PREFERENCES


Reading: Romance, humor, and tragedy. Romance generally. The other two often go along with that.

And Writing: I like humor because I never worry if what I write turns out dumb, since it’s usually the point. However, I’ve been exploring some other areas recently. It’s been fun, but I need a lot of work.


~ PAIRINGS


Well, I said I like romance. So my pairing preferences? Well, they are… (note the blatant whoring of certain characters within different series)

NARUTO: Sasuke x Sakura (OTP), Shikamaru x Ino, Itachi x Ino, Sasuke x Ino, Naruto x Hinata

HARVEST MOON: Kurt x Gwen, Kurt x Dia, Kurt x Jamie, Joe x Katie, Louis x Lyla, Parsley x Lyla

DRAGON BALL: Vegeta x Bulma, Gohan x Videl, Goten x Valese, Trunks x Goten, Goku x Chi Chi, Yamcha x Bulma, Trunks x Pan

FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST: Edward x Winry, Roy x Riza



I found this while looking at someone's profile, so I just figured I'd do it out of boredom:

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I MUST be gay too.

I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid. Okay, seriously though, who doesn't. AMAZINGLY, some black people...
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA, he was...
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.

I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.

I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.

I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, so I MUST be having cyber sex

I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.

I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

1. That's A Promise » reviews
What if Sakura DID convince Sasuke to stay when he left for Orochimaru's...? But while she promises not to tell the higher ups about any of it, Sasuke has to promise not to try and leave again. Well, it can't be that hard to keep a promise... Right?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - General/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 12,299 - Reviews: 22 - Updated: 9-3-09 - Published: 12-4-08 - Sasuke U. & Sakura H.
2. Love You, Love You reviews
-SasuSaku Oneshot- “This is weird. I kind of thought you’d be the one of us to die depressed and alone, but I’m watching your girlfriend obsessing over wedding details,” Naruto commented. - Proposals can be hard, but surely it's worth the trouble.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,776 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 8-4-09 - Sasuke U. & Sakura H.
3. The New Generation » reviews
They can't stay single and childless forever. At some point, our favorite characters will have to deal with the terrors of parenthood. It just had to be. This is the new generation of the Leaf. The new generation of the Uchiha. Introducing, Tachi Uchiha.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - General/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,899 - Reviews: 4 - Updated: 7-21-09 - Published: 5-20-09 - Sasuke U. & Sakura H.
4. Just Friends » reviews
Jamie and Kurt are friends—maybe even "best friends". But when Kurt starts to view her as more than that, what happens? Will it ruin their friendship, or will it be the birth of another, different, kind of relationship? -Story currently on stand-still-
Harvest Moon - Rated: T - English - Romance/General - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,139 - Reviews: 9 - Updated: 6-19-09 - Published: 1-20-09 - Kurt & Jamie
5. Rainy Day reviews
-SasuSaku Oneshot- For Sakura, a rainy winter day stuck working in a hospital is a total drag. Leave it up to a certain raven-haired patient to keep the boredom away--and keep Sakura's thoughts from being straight.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,830 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 6-6-09 - Sasuke U. & Sakura H. - Complete
6. Idiot reviews
If someone broke their mother's dear vase you'd think they would at least have the decency to take the blame for what they did. Clearly this isn't the case for Tachi Uchiha--who pins this one on his younger brother, much to their sister Hanami's dismay.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,405 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 5-22-09 - Sasuke U. & Sakura H. - Complete
7. Uchiha Revival » reviews
We all know Sasuke wants to revive his clan. And we all know that means he'd have to have kids. With help from Kakashi, he holds a competition to see who will have the "privilege" of bearing him children, rather than finding a girl he likes. Okay... WHAT?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,926 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 5-20-09 - Published: 2-2-09 - Sasuke U. & Kakashi H.
8. The Voice » reviews
Cube is hearing voices! And they're telling him to kill. What's a penguin to do? -grammar mistakes in older chapters will be cleaned up soon-
Animal Crossing - Rated: M - English - Humor/Crime - Chapters: 11 - Words: 9,792 - Reviews: 30 - Updated: 5-15-09 - Published: 5-12-06
9. Conclusion reviews
Faced with a moment of silence, to himself, for the first time in a while, Sasuke finds himself thinking back to his days back in the Leaf Village. And a certain pink-haired kunoichi seems to be creeping into these thoughts more than anything else...
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,218 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 3-22-09 - Sasuke U. & Sakura H. - Complete
10. Feeling Giddy reviews
It's Sasuke's birthday, but he seems to be acting... odd. Naruto grows fearful about his friend's sudden freakish giddiness, wondering what could be wrong with him. But the reason behind it all is something Naruto never saw coming. And what's with Sakura?
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,192 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 3-9-09 - Sasuke U. & Naruto U. - Complete
11. Team Nine's Egg Hunt!
Characters are from a Naruto Roleplay forum. Team Nine celebrates Easter by having an egg hunt. With Tachi dressed as the Easter Bunny, Kagetsu and Naoko trying their best to outdo the other, and Amaya having great luck, what could go wrong?
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,125 - Published: 1-21-09 - Sasuke U. & Kakashi H. - Complete
12. Happy Birthday reviews
Oneshot. Sasuke starts getting romantic feelings for Sakura, and isn't entirely sure what to do about it. Although Kakashi recommends simply telling her, Sasuke isn't sure he wants to.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,667 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 12-4-08 - Sasuke U. & Sakura H. - Complete
13. Wake Up, Brother reviews
Oneshot. Kurt's talking in his sleep, and Joe, being the loving older brother he is, teases him about the things he says. Which is particularly embarrassing when you talk about wanting little kid toys. Based on Save The Homeland.
Harvest Moon - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 725 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 11-25-06 - Kurt & Joe - Complete
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