Yo. I am seventeen, and I write. I go by the name of HOOTIE and am SUPAFLY.

I am single, built out of awesome bricks, and I have never taken a long walk on the beach. I don't like Mondays, thoroughly enjoy dancing, have many friends, and am a little more than a slight romantic who is a little more than in love with Mr. Darcy. And Captain Wenworth. And Batman. Also, Mr. Sheffield and cucumbers aren't that bad either. Anyone who disagrees with me on any of these points is to be boiled in oil at sundown, which totally happened way-back-when 300 years before Darcy was born and therefore the world was in turmoil. Seriously.

CURRENT FIC
Um. I am a retard who doesn't update anything. At all. I have no motivation. Feel free to throw rocks at me. Kind of like the ones Charlie Brown got for Halloween.

FUTURE FICS
They're happening. Plot wolverines are still hanging around. I really just thought that since I had a 'current' and 'past' section, I shouldn't leave future out. I mean honestly. Check out the sick alliteration.

PAST FICS
I'm ashamed of my RLNT fanfiction. ASAHMED. But I can't part with it for some weird emotional-attachment sort of thing. But really? I looked at The Courtyard and cringed. It's scary. And I thank everyone who followed along and thought I was good, that was really good of you and I love you and I hope you stick around now that I don't write total complete waste-worthy-of-being-flushed-into-oblivion.

PERSONAL AD!
I live in a town that is very rural and very often very boring. I enjoy living vicariously through my characters but I must say that I thoroughly enjoy my life as it is. Not counting acquaintances, I'm pretty sure I have exactly 15,000 friends who are all really awesome and funny and nice and we get into craploads of trouble every time we get together. Last time we hung out as a group ... oh, dear lord, you don't even want to know.

We have some really interesting conversations and interactions, too. And no, that doesn't mean thought-provoking/deep/in depth/meaningful. It means interesting. It means running around with twelve ice cubes in your hands shouting "WHERE SHOULD I PUT THEM NOW?" and playing Jenga with our eyes closed. And discussing how to fit various musical artists into boxes so we can kidnap them and take them home. Also, we discuss bottling certain schoolmates and selling them as perfume.

I am Straight Edge, I want a tattoo, and I'm close friends with my mother. I love Mr. Darcy, Knightley, and Wentworth, and I really want to find my own. Emos sometimes make me laugh, I only pretend to support anarchy, I actually have a lot of faith in our political system, and every morning I wake up to a witty phrase uttered by my badass butler clock. When that doesn't work, my mother just comes in and shouts at me.

DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU, AND DAMN ANYONE WHO DOESN'T PUT A LIGHT IN THEIR WINDOW SO THEY CAN STAY UP ALL NIGHT, DAMNING YOU!

As much as I loathe that series with all my heart, I also effectively loathed the Darcy for the first few episodes, which has actually never truly happened before. Plus, Bingley totally one, even though Amanda totally deserves a stake (steak) through her chest for various reasons. I mean ... beaver hunting? Seriously? Or was it otters. Meh. Either way. Movie sucked, Bingley wins, I'm a sucker for a good Darcy. Love Colin Firth, wasting 6 hours of one's life always wins, maybe I should actually write something for you people to read. Currently thinking of a story titled "The Engagement" ... be afraid.

Love you all,

Eat a Taco

No seriously eat it. I dare you.