Name: Lady Charity, Goddess of the moon, stars, sun, fire, ocean, war, creativity, acting, writing, and chocolate.

Age: 1000

gender: ...if you don't know by now...you're more idiotic than i thought.

I eat: desserts

I drink: water

I watch: random pinpoints in front of me which cause people to wonder if I went back to my la la land again (which is true)

I live in: Neverland

I look like: me!

I kill: YOUUU!

Real life quotes

Something funny in real life happens, I write it down. Simple as that.

Tony: Screw you Waldo, go find yourself.

Me: And now...i will have to use The One to decide such drastic decisions...a technique used by my forefathers to help them when the wrong choice will be dire, when all hope is lost, The One will always be there to help you when it is needed...EENIE-MEENIE-MINEY-MOE!

RiKuna: So what'll we get him?

Me: What about the man's best friend?

RiKuna: Beer?

This is during gym when it's really hot in the gym

Mr. H (gym teacher): no, we can't open the doors outside. We could let things in like dogs, or guys with guns or...

Marge: snowflake fairies!

Mr. C: ...for example, if someone ate a whole can of pork n' beans and had some gastral difficulties, we'd all be experiencing DIFFUSION. Unless he had serious problems and it became osmosis...you know i shouldn't have said that...

In gym doing gymnastics

Marge: What if we run into the wall?

Mr. H: Just don't hurt the wall and we'll be fine.

Denny: Lyndsay, can you hear me? I am your conscience speaking...

The little thief! I made up that line before he did!

Deb: Hey A, who drew Mona Lisa, again?

Me: Leonardo DiCaprio..

(silence)

Deb: You mean DaVINCI?

Me: That's what i said...

Deb:...

Mr S: Sissel is being very proactive.

London: Dude, that's ACNE TREATMENT.

Mr. S (To K): Is this your book?

Kayla: Our school library's.

Mr. S: I'll take it for now, thank you very much. I'll return it to you after our lesson. (looks at cover) Senior Year? Is this some chick flick book?

Kayla: Kinda.

Mr S. (opens to random page and reads out loud): Conner looked down at her WHOAH!

Mr S.: London, are you in track?

London: Yeah, why?

Mr S.: Cuz they don't have any competitions to run your mouth.

about our Egg babies

Mr K (choir teacher after on the phone): This is very serious...Jaleel. (dramatic pause) Your child is waiting for you in the guidance office.

egg babies again

Miss W: if i see you guys playing with your eggs i am going to kidnap them and eat them for ransom!

Movie day at school

Mrs. G:...today we'll be watching Princess of Thieves, starring Keira Knightley--

Us: (cheers)

Jason: Ooh, Keira Knightley...

Mrs. G: (over loud din) or we could watch something educational...

Jason: (eagerly) Is Keira Knightley in it?

movie day again

Mrs. G:...and while you're watching the movie, use this paper to take notes on the Middle Ages facts we learned about...NOT things like 'Keira Knightley is Hot'...

Jason: Protest! PROTEST!

Mr. H. is frustrated because David is messing around when he is explaining rules about baseball in gym class

Mr. H: Lyndsay, do you like it when people throw things at you?

Lyndsay: (confused)...no...

Mr. H: And would you get mad if they did?

Lyndsay...sure...

Mr. H: And if they did, would you punch them in the face?

Lyndsay:...er...

Mr. H: Because David was throwing junk at you (all eyes at David, who is truly guilty) So if you want to hit him, be my guest.

David: I missed...it didn't really hit her.

Mr. H: David, if you want to ask Lyndsay out on a date, just say it to her!

David: HUH?

Mr. H: Just go up to her and say..."Lyndsay, i think you're beautiful. Will you go out to the movies with me?"

David and Lyndsay!

Same day on gym. David is doing poorly.

Mr H: David! Get your mind off of Lyndsay and get in the game!

Mr H.: You know, I could pummel your head with this kick ball ten times...but I can't do that because then your head will hurt the ball.

Mrs H. (Home Ec Teacher): Why do I feel like I'm talking to a wall?

Dan: Because Jake's in your direction.

during science

Michael: (showing small model of a loon) And this...is a loon.

Mr C: Really...? Is it a female loon?

Michael: Uh...(flips loon over)

Mr. C: DON'T CHECK THAT WAY!

At Alive Music Festival

Lead singer of Relient K (Matt Thiessen): ...I think that mosquito had friends...that didn't like that I killed it...they're all attacking me now...uh oh...

Either Hawk Nelson's lead singer or Starfield's: Now, this song we're going to sing is the best in our record...'CAUSE WE DIDN'T WRITE IT!

TobyMac: Now, before I begin the next song, I want to ask you all something...it's been on my mind for a while...ARE THERE ANY JESUS FREAKS OUT THERE?!

Debbie: So what do you want for your birthday?

Me: Lucas Grabeel ain't bad.

Me: Look at Toffee's (dog) ears! They're so POOFY!

Debbie: Unlike Ryan (High School Musical)

Me: ...why would Ryan's ears be poofy?

Debbie: I mean his HAIR.

Me:OHHHHHHHHH!

Me and Deb: (in tune of We're All In This Together) We All Will Die Together, Because School has begun, No More Sun, Or Freedom, We all Will Die Together, As We March, Hand in Hand, To Our Death Sente-e-e-e-ence!

T'is True, the Terror Has Been Released. Not to mention this little number...

Me: (In tune of What Time Is It?) What Time Is It? School Time, No More Vacation, What Time Is It? The End Of Our Lives, Summer's Out, Cry and Pout!

Me: I can't find Chris Daughtery's song Home on iTunes! I type in his name, but so far all I got is this dude named Chris DAUGHTERY...when I type Chris Daughtry...

Dien: ...

Me: That is the guy I'm looking for...isn't it...?

Dien: Yeeaahh...

Mr G. (Math teacher): Sorry guys, I keep forgetting that I'm an idiot.

K: Hey Mr. Gbr.

L: Did you call him (Mr. G) Mr. Gbr?

K: Yeah, so?

L: He's Mr. G

K: Yeah, well, there's a resemblence between them!

J: No there's not. Mr. Gbr is like, six feet, and Mr. G is like five...

Mr. G: Yeah, and I'm a hundred times better looking than that guy too.

Mr W: (holds up a magazine) Lindsay Lohan arrested! Now that should be on someone's American History poster!

Mr W: Are you guys on drugs?

Mr G.: I will be reviewing word problems with you, and I apologize to you in advance because one, it's a Friday, and two, I'm in a tutu trying to teach math to people who won't take me seriously.

Mrs. B: Okay, so here are some safety rules during trick-or-treating. 1. don't go alone, 2. don't take candy from strangers-

us: ...isn't that...the whole point of trick or treating?

Mrs. B: Hey, don't ask me, I'm just reading off the flier...

Mr G.: So, complete this worksheet and after you're done, you're free to use the restroom. If you have any questions, ask me and I'll be happy to ignore you. Did I say ignore, I mean help! (shifty eyes)

(Seventh grade bell rings and seventh graders go crazy in hallway during math)

K: Do you want me to close the door, Mr. G?

Mr G.: Nah, Leave it open. I like to hear the idiots roam.

Me: There's too many Chinese people in this school.

Mr G.: You think this place has too many Chinese people here? You should see China, that place is packed...

Bethany: A, I made a terrible mistake.

Me: What's that?

Bethany: I came to school today.

Deb: No. NO. You sing another Sweeney Todd song and YOU WILL DIE.

Deb: What is that?

Me: It's priest...'ave a li'le priest...is it really good? Sir it's too good at least...

Deb: NOOOOOOOOO!

Dad: What's wrong with her (Deb)?

Me: Must've been all those doggone cocoa beans. (cheesy grin)

Mr. G: (answering the phone) GIVE ME SOME GOOD NEWS.

Mr. G: (On the phone again) You want to know where he is? Okay, I'll just use my super psychic powers to find out. Woooaahhhhooohhh Oh wait! I just remembered! I DON'T KNOW!

Mr. G (On the phone...again). Can you PLEASE stop calling me? I've got students taking tests! Look, there's a little girl crying (points to a guy trying to take a test)! Her whole future is depending on this test and you're disrupting it!

Kevin: I'm not a crying girl-

Us: Who keeps calling you and asking you where some kid is!

Mr. G.: ...my mom. Get back to your tests.

Me: I found out that Tim Burton hangs fake dead babies on his Christmas trees.

Deb: ...dead babies!

Me: Uh huh!

Deb: ...something is seriously wrong with that man.

Mr. G: Here's your test, you have forty minutes to complete it. If you have any questions, ask me and I won't help you. I refuse!

RJ: Hey, Mrs. V, how do you say 'gray' in Spanish?

Mrs. V: Gris. grees

RJ: Ew, no, I'm not talking about grease, we're not having a barbeque.

Jerry: Grease? I love that movie!

Emily: Didn't Mr. V dress as one of the characters from that movie for Halloween?

Emma: Speaking of Halloween, did you see Mr. G's costume last year?

Megan: Yeah! He painted his whole body blue!

Me: ...wait...what was RJ's question again?

RJ: ...good question...

Megan: I really don't like health class. We learn how to make babies!

Me: Think on the bright side. At least Mrs. A doesn't make us do hands-on-activities...

Megan: Dead puppy!

Me: WAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!

(don't ask...)

Emily: You think you're great? Then try dissing me.

RJ: F-fine! Uhh...umm...your jacket...uhh...your jacket is so big, even Mr. S can't wear it!

Emily: ...

Jess: If it's really big...don't you mean that Mr. S can wear it?

RJ: Ehehe...oops...

(After watching Finding Neverland)

Me: So, how did ya like it?! (I already watched it once)

Deb: Meh. It wasn't as good as you said it was. You exaggerated.

Me: Wha?!

Deb: I mean, I already guessed that Sylvia was gonna die right from the beginning anyways, so I didn't care.

Ashley: I got sad when Barrie and Peter talked at the end.

Deb: I didn't feel sad. I was just thinking how freaky Freddie Highmore's eyes were.

(After watching Finding Neverland)

Me: You didn't feel sad at all?! You didn't even get wet eyes?!

Deb: No. I only cry when I watch happy movies. If I watch a sad movie, i have no reaction whatsoever, but when I watch nice and happy movies, I blubber like a baby.

Me: Why?!

Deb: I don't know...maybe because I find out that there's someone happier than me...

Lyndsay: I have ODAD. Obsessed with David Archulata Disorder.

Me: Well I have OJDD. Obsessed with Johnny Depp Disorder.

Megan: I have OFD. Obsessive Friends Disorder. I heard it's hazardous for your sanity.

Mrs. V: This song was written twelve years ago. You know, twelve years seems like a really long time.

Megan: Yeah, that was back when Britney Spears was actually a normal person!

Me: I has a cookie. Nom nom nom nom...

Deb: You 'nom' one more time and I'm shoving something down your throat and it's definitely not a cookie.

Me: Megan! Guess what?! Guess what?! Guess what?!

Megan: What?

Me: ...shoot. I forget.

Deb: Playing Halo is definitely not manly, Peter.

Me: Yeah, you need to be more manly and stop playing Halo. Like Peter Pan. Peter Pan is much more manly than you are.

Peter: Yeah, because a flying kid wearing green tights is incredibly masculine...

During choir rehearsals using risers

Summer: Wouldn't it be funny while we're dancing to Heart and Soul one of us trips and falls on you?

Me: Well, if you trip, I'll dodge. And when you crack your head open I will laugh at you and then call 911.

Carrie: No you wouldn't.

Me: You're right. I'd just laugh.

Me: We saw a lot of skinny squirrels in our class trip to Washington D.C.

Deb: Really? That's surprising, considering there are so many nuts in the White House.

Deb: Almost all the scariest horror movies originated in Japan. The Eye, The Grudge...tells you how scary about Japan, eh?

Me: Yeah, especially with those happy Hamtaros and Hello Kitties too.

The following couple quotes are from the Alive Christian Music Festival

tobyMac: I just ate microphone!

Lead singer of Casting Crowns: We got a lot of our inspiration from pray-Oh look! A kitty!

Lead singer of Eleventyseven: Now in this song I want you all to go crazy! Except don't do it in front of the safety guards, because they'll eat you. Seriously.

Magician: (to little kid) I want you to take this piece of string. Put it under your pillow tonight and in the morning...it will STILL BE THERE.

Lead singer of Skillet: Hello everyone! We're Skillet and we're named after a frying pan! WOOH!

At a family friend's house

Me: Mom took lots of pictures of chickens at Jamestown.

B: Yeah, where we went, we saw lots of chickens too. a lot of pairs. A rooster and a hen.

Me: In Jamestown, there was only one rooster and a lot of hens.

B:...they must be Mormon chickens then.

(insert line break here)

(Girl playing My Heart Will Go On during choir on the piano)

Mr. K: The ship sunk. Get over it.

(insert line break here)

Deb: I don't think Letters From Iwo Jima is the most appropriate Thanksgiving movie.

Jeff: Are you kidding me? I'm thankful I wasn't there...

(insert line break here)

Mr. K: The choir was absolutely phenomenal with their facial expressions. I thought they were out of this world.

Ezzie: You know why I think they're out of this world? Because they're ALIENS.

Mr. K: Haha, aliens. Yeah, one of them was my DAUGHTER.

(insert line break here)

Natalie: Someday I want a dog that's a cross between a bulldog and a shih tzu just so I can call it a bullshit.

Mr. H: I can't believe you just said that.

(During Math)

Mr. S: Okay, so which problem from problems number eight to ten do you want me to do? Yes, RJ?

RJ: Okay, uh, can we do number eleven?

Mr. S: ...

My Stories:

Sweeney Todd: Sickened Soul, The Mysteries of the Past, My Love, Rain, Separated for Eternity, Imprisoned in Nightmare, Nightmares, Epiphany (7)

High School Musical: Captive (collab fic with DPSG-1), Run for your Lives Ryan and Gabriella, Lost in a Sea of Faces, A Letter to Heaven, Caesar's Brutus (written by my sissie), Gone (6)

Fruits Basket: Is it Too Late?, These Chains, Alone, Risking it All (written by my sissie, possibly discontinued) (4)

Lord of the Rings: LoTR's Trip to Canada! (1)

Peter Pan: Timeless (written by sissie) (1)

Avatar: The Last Airbender: Fading Flame Flickers Free, Lotus in the Game (written by sissie, discontinued), End (3)

Pirates of the Caribbean: How to Be a Pirate (written by sis), A Disappointing Life (written by sis) (2)

Harry Potter: Choice of Peril (written by sis, discontinued) (1)

Hetalia: Axis Powers: The Boston Massacre, Little Marie, Red Snow, Traitor (4)